User blog:Celicious/Celicious vs Mortal the Punk full Saga

Prelude: I challenge you all for a rap battle
I am looking for a challange, a rapper worth my time

I'm a savage, a lyrical mastermind

A master of words, my angles hurt

Poetic master of the universe

Improving my skills is essential to me

See the potential growing in me

Feel the power, save the hour

Be prepared, coward, or get devoured.

Celicious Round 1
Mortal, you're a bitch you bitch

Now face a god, have you had enough?

I send you through a portal to the  edges of the universe

I crush your soul and begin my second verse

Feel the hurt, the pain, spit and swallow

All the hot bars I drop while you hang on a gallow

You bitch, now face the music bitch get wrecked

Get used to the bars I spit in your neck

Man man man, what you're doing dawg

While you're picking like a chicking I'm diving like a hawk

I killed u, with verses hotter than the sun

Now please bring your rhymes, the battle's just begun bitch

Mortal round 1
Get your kids gloves off, child, cause right now I'll shock the earth with diss time.

Looked for a rapper worth your dear time so here's a rapper to birth your decline.

Celicious, please just know I'm well viscous.

Deliver hits to make yours back hunched, and that is not from Cell-ish use.

Its just that your selfish use of blogs creates issues.

But you will face dog bite marks when I will set the bitch loose.

So now disease infesting of self-proclaimed kings is now this Cell's issue

While I spit so sharp I am cutting through Cell's Tissues.

Bitch thinks he is Chris Brown the way he freely busts hits.

But unlike Chris Brown, the mob will deliver its justice.

So prepare to pop confetti when I drag his weak ass through dirt.

He will cry to his druggie momma that his pussy ass got hurt.

But it's not my fault this rascal wanted attention to get his ass blasted.

So, if I put you in the spotlight, you get exactly what you asked.

Just don't be surprised if that spotlight comes with a couple sniper dots.

The Wiki will scroll through another troll, who thought a Cell would be swiped the most.

But if you caught me lying in death bed with brain dysfunction and a writer's block.

I will still have more bars than this prick in his prime has got.

How can you claim I aint got sure wins when I tore through a mod, man.

I'm the rawer Zach Sherwin, you spit softer than Moleman.

They say to diss you might callback opponent's lines but here I must decline.

Cause ehh, your shit's too wack to be placed in words of mine.

Into the WC I dump wack MCs with relevancy of AWC.

Pickaxe at please when I pick at a weaselly sleaze and double what they see.

I'm bringing heat that even when he hits old age and Zheimers he wont forget it.

References YouTube clips with 7k views and then's surprised when no one gets it.

And don't even allow yourself to think so far,

That you're privileged enough to get these raw bars.

I'm just using this to show that any bitch who thinks I aint Tsar.

Will end up in a hood of car after they're crippled with a crowbar!

So don't fuck with me, I wrote Will v Em, but if to the Russian you are beefing then.

I will bury a bitch underground til in a month no one will hear from them.

Celicious round 2
The bitch delivered a response, it was delicious

When you see Licious, you get withered by this bread winning

neckspitting, headsplitting, black-whipping

bitch I am vicious

Oh? You’re just acting black, I’m getting results

A mortal’s in the crossfire; they be checking your pulse

Your heart’s pumping in a weird way, it seems it’s a given

You’re not BLACK, Mortal, of course your heart couldn’t keep to a rhythm

Check my dickstain dropping bars, I am winning

The only repeating sounds you will here is my asswhipping

Stop your gangster talk, stop your tough act, damn it, you’re white

You’re white and into movies, and apparently black stereotypes

You won a tournament? I think you’re lying bitch

Or maybe you won in the Paralympics

When you battle me, I ain’t trying shit

Cell-this cell-that, whatever you’re Cell-ing, I’m not buying it

So wannabe slave you better flee now

Before Fedor the bitch gets a beatdown

Damn, you’re soft. Softer than a virgin with Virgin Mary socks

I’m up in space, you’re Team Rocket James, just blasting off

Bitch, keep your wordplay at third base

Your life is useless while mine’s great

While I am on the mic giving throwaways

You give away your butthole on the freeway

I’m too advanced; I’m a super human in a fusion dance

Together with Goku and then I’ll hit you with a ‘ok boomer’, damn!

Acting like you’re all grown-’up’, then I’ll knock till you’re ‘down’

You fought Bantha117? Bro, why are you still monkeying around?

You’re salty, so here’s some sugar; I’m a good neighbor

Your sister? I won’t deflower her, I’ll bouquet her

It’s hammer time, you’re a tool, I’m a tool maker

I’ll follow you on Instagram, just to unfollow you later

You’re like “I’m Mortal” while I’m an immortal god

Spit in your neck and you’re like… what?

I talked to your mom about her boring son

Then searched for your mom on RussianPorn.com

Please bring me more, you fucking dummy

Please try harder for me honey

Please give me a run for my money

I’ll wrap Mortal up like a mummy

Mortal round 2
I'll now bite again, boy, I hit when I aim, boy.

Can you handle this pain, boy? I'm loose off the chain, boy.

So just use your brain, boy, how between you and me there's a selection.

When your shit sounds like its written in the Rhymezone Near Rhymes section. (Aargh!)

Which troll you're supposed to be again, son? Reign, Meat, Devil, Reson?

He's only butthurt cause Silent Mocker's dick is something that he stays on.

You'll be remembered as the boring troll to praise the fun ones before it.

Send this kid getting fucked in Death Note Wiki, a certain person there'll enjoy it. (Aye!)

And if we talk bout black and white don't critique me on the stuff I did

When your shit was written like Nas but sounds like its came from Sam Smith

Fucker cries cause he was a shit boyfriend and somehow that's where she fails?

Those supporters of yours are millennials, trapped their life inCells. (Rargh!)

A corny rapper beefing for attention who blames the women? I see the truth's revealed!

Get up Scooby gang. You're just Hopsin standing in the Walmart Employee Rapper field!

You've started here 4 days ago and still managed to waste all hits.

Cel will only Ring for seven days and death comes at the end of it.

First comes at me with Jake Paul beats then comes at me with no beats.

See, Paul beatings are rigged, in rings Cel lands no hits.

You aint winning when it comes to pictures, there's no fire in [BLANK].

So its to no one's surprise that you're firing blanks! (Brrah!)

I'd kill you myself but with how you're popping lean I see you do that plenty.

So I'll turn a buyer of Fentyl into Tyler Clementi. (Aargh!)

But there won't be no riots when Cel's killed, you wish you were like Emmet Till.

You wish all that attention but in truth your corpse will lay still.

Cause he thought he would find his worth here but only found his reign's killed.

So go head and slay pills, its your only chance to stay ill.

Mediocre pretentious writers who think they're the greatest? Well that answers all!

Cause if Cel thinks that he's Perfect he should latch on Dragon's Balls! (Yup!)

To me, child, your win, child, will only be cause you're a bitch, child.

So if in skill you are my still child, I'll go Casey Anthony wild!

Killing your ego I have sure tried, but I think a holiday will cure pride.

Take a trip to Mother Russia. I'll be your Gulag Tour Guide.

Celicious round 3
‘Good writing practice’, it may be your probable cause

But with your weak rhymes, you will not beat this unstoppable force

Who’s keeping scores? Celicious be mopping the floor

With this second best bitch, why you’re acting like a Luigi for?

On a Ouija board, I’ll be chopping you soon

Eating you for dinner, and shit you out by noon

I’m new in town, beating this champion clown

Next time Logan Paul visits Japan, he’s going to see you ‘hanging’ around

I am a neckspittin’, rap-winning killer, that put’s a shell in ‘em

Of all these wannabe g’s, you’re the best victem

I crash systems as I eat bitches for dinner

I’ll beat your ass that’s more useless than animefiller

Your verse was weak, your faillure is evident

The more you struggle, the more you become irrelevent

I’ll put the Cell into celibate

and get your cock chopped off by the caliphate

I am the dog that killed the ISIS leader

You’re a chicken, while I’m a Ceasar

I’m too agressive, I’m like Goku on Namek

I’ll smack yo u so hard, we be shaking the planet

Your bars  are slow and shaky like a seizure

I’m not even trying, dissing you while beating Freezer

Destroying the ground that you stand on

Leave more blood on your face, than on your sisters tampon

I’m Celicious, my entire name is wordplay!

While your name is what edgy nice guys wear on a first date

‘Fedor’, time to get sore, I rap better, I’m a trendsetter

Who are you? Nothing but a bitchass bitchy bedwetter

Your mother? I’ll slap that donkey right into her coffin

I’ll call you both a bitch 300 times without stuttering

I’m taking this bitch from behind, cancer

Everyone's gonna follow me like linedancers

Celicious round 4: Freestyle
Mortal is a cocksucker, he loves to touch dick

If you have a dildo, he has a place to put it

He is afraid to battle me, after he was destroyed

He ran like a puppy, now he is all alone

Fuck you big big blob

Hope you choke on cock

I hope ISIS shows up

And blows you up

cocksucker Dont @ me

Celicious round 5
Mortal, you’re a punk, you live in a lie

You think you’re black, but you don’t know what the struggle is like

Please send your punkass to prison for life,

So you can get fucked in the ass by 40 blackas tonight

Your mom is a bitch, I'll stalk her

Wanna be a movie star? You'll crash like Paul Walker

Your lines are too long and you're playing pretend

It's like you being an actor, doesn't make any cents

Won a tournament, but can't structure lines properly

The thought of me on top will be reality as I drop these beats

Honestly, half your shit doesn't rhyme, I'm in control like Babidi

Stomping this Russian commie as I own your property like Monopoly

I pit pit spit  in your neck and you can never burn me

Comments said I won, you didn’t deserve to win the tourney

Firstly, when you heard me, you gave me props and respect

You tried your best to come up with shit at the top of the head

But all those boys and childs makes nobody go wild

I didn't know you were searching for pedophiles

Please stop acting like you're tough, getting mad at what I say

Then brush it off the next day like 'He's just a troll, it's okay"

If I was a troll I'd go back under my bridge, but still

You should jump of a bridge because a troll just got you killed

I might transfer some of my talent to you

but you’d just use to it to get some penis as food

Check how I do raps these bars, you’re lazy and soft

Even Muhammad Ali would find it hard to be shaking these off

Let me tell you a story, about how you’ll never be man to me

I’m not just Jekyll and Hyde; I’m Jekyll, Hyde, Sam and Anthony

Choosing to battle me was a worse mistake than your mother made

In that period where she could’ve set an abortion date

Only big booty bigfoot bitches are ever allowed to touch me

Ultimately, you tried but you never should have trust me

See? It even spells out my name if you look at the first letters

It’s over! This is what a ‘tourney winner’ curse gets ya!

You're ordinary, a Mortal, nothing you do is special

The ERBWiki is a desolate wasteland, that's why you won a medal

Your battles are mundane, your bars are a joke

I make people laugh, you make them re-read what you wrote

Intricate delivery? You don't have it

Creativity? Yeah, you're lacking

You think you're so clever, that's barely believable

Cause unlike your bars, your actions are readable

Cause you're Fedor, a brittle little hip-hop nerd

With writtens nobody gets it, looking like a signature

You look like you're about to save the whole of Middle Earth

With your miniature army, you've been cursed since your birth

Incell lookalike, I guess chicks don't dig your words

So you've become a goblin looking ass like a poor Mister Burns

You would watch a YouTube video just to comment a witty 'First!'

You've dealt with a lot of opponents, but Celicious is the worst

Mortal please stop your bitching

I went to Russianporn.com and bought a whole subscription

Mortal round 3
How's it poppin, get your condoms out your pockets, it's a robbing!

Now we ain't fucking around but from me I see Cel’s throbbing!

I could easily mind torture any wack rapper so their rap skill will ascend.

But teaching Cel to spit some bars? Its easier to teach Weinstein consent!

Cause you might think these are some hot bars that you’re writing.

But Michael J Fox could not shake em up to be exciting!

Is there a single thing exciting about this boring Caveman add-on?

The only way that you’re Super is cause you pffh don’t have a leg to stand on!

Bitch, I always dom like Kirkburn despite “acting blacker”.

So I’ll be spanking your childish ass Fifty Shades Darker!

Call me MortaThanos cause I half lives when I go hard as a rock.

I would tell you to go fuck yourself but you’ve already been on CE’s cock.

Describing your pathetic verses? That's a shitpost!

Mailing horse manure to you? That's a shit post!

Delivery only came after a month? That's a shit post!

Using manure to compost your Sunflower? That's a shit Post!

Get your diapers ready cause I’m the one who shits most!

So swallow the truth, Cel, cause you will never spit most!

I bet when you play Smash Brothers you play Pit most!

You uneducated swine, it is clear Toon Link beats most!

I’ll separate your limbs all over the place, so they’re like sand.

Your simpleton! My verse is too high IQ for you to understand!

I write complex stuff, you fuck! I sacrifice lyrical bloodshed!

And your response was "that's too long"? Well that's what she said!

What a murderous second verse! I’ll do third for the record.

Cause I killed it this time! I am slaughtering seconds!

You caught that wordplay, you butt-plug loving butt?

Bitches will call me Big Dick Jigsaw when I seal your trap shut!

Aw fuck, the ERB came out, I’ll first go see it then get this rap done.

Because I’d rather see two clowns rapping instead of just one.

I wish this was 1944 so you could take an Auschwitz trip for me.

But there ain't no spitting in your neck, I don’t want the noose to be slippery.

Celicious round 6
A respond, what a mess you’ve made

I’ll slap my balls across your chin to shut your face

You’re a punk, a loser, a bitch bro

You only got a stomp where you once got a dick bro

I let the monkeys loose, they are free to choose

Will they bite you in the nuts, or eat your ass as food

Mortal be on the loose, running for safety

He hears the dogs closing in, as they keep chasin’

He has nowhere to go, Celicious sees him through the scope

One shot one kill, from your neck through your throat

When you’re kneeling down, Ill take you with me

Stab you with a dirty needle now you have HIV

Put you in a cage, cut out your tongue

no more battlerapping for this wannabe punk

Shoot your little balls off with a shotgun

Blow dirty smoke through a pipe into your lungs

When we’re done, there will be nothing left

Smearing smegma on your nose and ya neck

Give me the respect, that I deserve

You bitches better learn, who beat this nerd

This senile BITCH, uberweaboo with autism

After this battle, your balls will be missin’

Skipping dimensions, beating you with no tension

Put a meter long dildo into this freshman

Still got big words? Be my guest man

After next period you’ll be dead, not questions

I’ll hit you in your blasted nuts, with my Flintstone club

Then hit up your mom and call her Jabba the Slut

I’ll send your punkass ass to heaven

Watch you crash and burn like it’s 9/11

I’ll hit you with my piece, I bring peace to the Middle East

Then take a shit in the streets, Call them arabs and dirty their sheets

Bitch I ain’t lyin’, soon you’ll be dyin’

Then set your ass on fire, your balls will be fryin’

Guys, I’m taking down this Warhammer loser

Before he transforms into a school shooter

However, we will probably be fine

Since this BITCH misses his targets all the time

I am a lyrical genius, beating this lost cause

Bringing more fire than the Holocaust

Mortal is a failure and a mess

His Bars have volume but no mass

I’ll take his throne, we will all be free

When this Mortal punkass troll gets banned from the wiki

Mortal round 4
I am a brave, spiritual lyrical individual willing to beat women up for cash.

I'd say that you rap good, but you're not black like Nash!

I'm the Ruski Kamasutrski, you're just kind of lonely

Kitana slid in my DMs last night and friendzoned me

Are you and Frank together? That's very gay.

You got some great verses. I hate my life, JK.

Swoosh,boosh, your penis has no bush!

I'll scream at you like you were giving birth. Push!

Bloody fucking hell, we got this *demonotised* who thinks he is not a sock

Of that Frank troll and his not massive cock

You're just a horny flapper from the 1920s decade

You should have called me if you and Frank wanted to get laid

Very funny that you say that my date skills went to hell

Cause I'm a marriage counsultant, could book you two a hotel?

Or maybe its a room for one! Fuck, those jokes are overdone

I should have stuck to the parody instead of doing my own lines, this is not fun!

I am not even sure you even dissed my date skills, Cel

I guess I am just jealous that your magic stick stands

Took you a minute to realise its a self diss but its not

Cause it stands against Frank Haha! I got you (not)

Seriously, lets grow up, this is a waste of time

We could concentrate on world hunger, Hong Kong or Amazon Prime

I can indeed confirm that I regret saying we should have three verses

Instead of this I could have just wrote one of my guest verses

See I'm so tired of this shit I cannot even bother rhyming

The parody is even gone too, I'm not even trying

Because I dont know shit about you man, I guess judging is a man's habit

But this fight to prove whose dick is better only proved that we both dont have it

Don't even say stuff like "Ehhhhhhhh, its a fucking shitpost and a joke, you broke!"

But man where we at right now still dont have any worth

Man, this would be much better if the rhyming wasnt forced

So if you do another verse kid, go suck Roman Polinski's cock.

Celicious round 7
​​​​​​​Try to fight with Celicious and it’ll turn to danger

There are certains ways players earn their paper

You don’t got no wage so don’t deserve a wager

You’re a Star impersonator while I’m Ursa Major

I’m more shocking than touching a circuit breaker

Befriending your mom then fucking her like a dirty traitor

You probably wear blazers, I’m fighting thirty raiders

You’re surely a concerning hater; let me return the favour

Why don’t you juggle my balls like a circus trainer

You’re not serving me like you’re a worthless waiter

I’m a slayer, stunting on you like an urban skater

I’ve got game on lock, big key like I’m turning mayor

I’m greater compared to this nerdy gamer

I’ve got layers like cake-baker, I’m a worthy savior

It’s curtains, you’ll always be a quirky failure

While I’m metal to the bone as the Terminator