User blog:TJBoyd/ERB of TJBoyd 3: Paris Hilton vs Ronald Reagan

Ronald Reagan:

Hello America. It’s your favorite president actor.

I’m about to address this badly dressed acting detractor

You got fame and high class cash and fashion.

But you lack in basic human compassion.

On the inside your empty, cold, and narcissistic

I don’t know ‘bout your life, but your brain is simplistic

I’m a conservative legend who ended the Cold War.

The toughest enemy you had to face was a cold sore.

Paris Hilton:

You didn’t win the Cold War. Russia chose to retire.

You’re not a Great Communicator you’re just a great liar.

I’ll ruin you faster than you ruined the Golden State

I got a bank account that’s bigger than the Golden Gate

You don’t stomp on Pinkos. You just thump on your bible.

You got a big black list full of slander and libel.

I put 5 K on my dog who got lost without a collar.

When all your social programs failed you wouldn’t spend a dollar.

Ronald Reagan:

I’ll defeat you in a landslide like my second election.

I watched your sex tape and didn’t even get an erection.

You’re just a bimbo blonde without a college education

I’ll abort you on behalf of the conscience of this nation

I respect all faiths. Presbyterian to pentacostal.

I’d rather stay in the Watergate than your filthy hostel.

I don’t know what’s flatter, your body or personality

Both are shaped like a wall. I’ll tear you down with brutality.

Paris Hilton:

Appointing the first woman supreme justice. That’s hot.

Saying it’s a great time for botulism. That’s not.

You gave to the military and took from the crippled.

Your Reagan economics left our deficit tripled.

Half your administration quit after one single scandal.

The publicity I get you could never hope to handle.

I’m a supermodel but I’m not just here to look pretty.

Call me richer Paris. I’ve got more money than the city.

Who won? Paris Hilton Ronald Reagan

Who’s Next? John Kerry vs ??? Dolly Parton Elton John Emmylou Harris Fabrizio De Andre Francesco De Gregori Gordon Lightfoot James Taylor Justin Timberlake Leonard Cohen Yusuf Islam