User blog:Bobdave/Bob and Loyg's Too Swaggy To Handle Rap Battles of Too Swaggy To Handlery - Tupac vs A Six Pack

I'm sorry

So very sorry

Announcer:
SWAGGY OF AND BOB HANDLE HANDLERY RAP TOO LOYG'S TO BATTLES TOO TO SWAGGY!

TUPAC

VS

A SIX PACK!

GEBNI!

A Six Pack
Starting off flabby, then slimmin' it down, but keeping it phat at the same time

Licking your nuts until you scream! I'm like you, but better by three times!

Six pack of beer? Drinking it! Six pack of doughnuts? Eating it!

Sick raps of fears? Spitting them! Your tight little ass? Beating it!

You got shot and died, bitch!

Tupac
I'm Pac to the two, and I'm crapping a poo

Be right back, I got rapping to do

Oh wait, that's right, I'm doing that now

When I got shot, I was like.....

...

...

Owwww!

'Six Pack shows off his amazing muscles. A group of turned on women appear to rap against Tupac'

A Woman
Hey, you! Yeah, the black faggot!

Didn't you die? Leave us alone or your tight little ass, we'll slap it!

This six pack is so hot, I feel like taking off my clothes!

Me too! I just wanna feel those muscles on my toes!

Six Pack
Uh, what the fu-

Loyg
I don't know shit about Tupac, so here's some more horny women

Women
Your music is shit, but these abs are THE shit!

I'm extremely aroused, just look at my stiff tits!

I'm the ugly one, but I'm still in the mood for that six pack

And I'm a straight up whore, getting ready for a lick sack!

Ooooooh~

Fuck yooooouuuuuu~

Six Pack
Seriously, what the fu-

Biggie Smalls
Yo, it's Biggie!

Tupac
My niggie!

Biggie Smalls
I'm 'bout to switch on this bitch

When I jump in my car, I drive to mall

And go shopping for dresses and try on them all

Got my eye on the balls when I'm at the male strip club

Now come here, six pack, I wanna smack your tits up

Lil Wayne
Now hold up a minute, niggas

I won't let you rappers get all the fun and sniggers

I got a gun, I pull the trigga

Now you're dead

NIGGA

Nicki Minaj
Auyfkytdwe

pesrsths

rtg

zrthkzhpkh

YAARWAYA$RAK

Jay-Z
I agree

Snoop Dogg
420, 420, I be gettin' all them ho's'es

My flow's jizz, got a long staff like Moses

When I part ladies asses like the red sea

They be like "damn, that six pack is sexy"

...

So I'm like...

"Bitch ass six pack, get in my vanizzle!"

"You going for a ride, tied up in the canizzal"

And then these ladies will be sucking on my toes

Now I gotta go guest star in some montage videoz

Nice Peter
It's us again, back for fun in this rapping shit!

EpicLLOYD
If there's one thing our dicks get, it's a lot of clit!

Zach Sherwin
It doesn't fit!

Dante Cimadamore
Cause it's too big!

Zach and Dante
Push it in a bit!

Mike Betette
While I'll be busy burying my face in their tits!

EpicLLOYD
That's right, Mike! Now let me spit a sick diss!

Nice Peter
Yeah, Snoop probably has a wrinkly dinkly sis!

Zach Sherwin
Drink my piss!

Dante Cimadamore
Then drink this!

jerks off

Zach and Dante
Afterwards, you'll get no kiss!

Mike Betette
I'll shoot my load on their faces, you can bet I won't miss!

Eminem
Sama lama duma lama, It's eminememinemem

Inseminating women in the bathroom again and again

Sending a friend to penetrate your feminine end

My bellend is tender, wait, you're 10? I've commited a felony then

Gonna gel up my penis, you ready to eat this?

You're telling me you're seven? Well I'll never believe it!

Your cleavage is tight, your clit's smelling like cheesits

If I'm a Rap God then is Hailie Rap Jesus?

I'm a pedophile, I creep on childs

Then lube my dick up with their fecal pile

I need their smile to fuel my boner

I ride round town with a dude called Jonah

We rented a van, I went to the can

Then when I came back, I lent him my cam

So he could take pics of children in the nude

Jude
Is this going too far?

Barry
Fuck no, Jude!

Watsky
It'sWatskyrappingfastandpoppingacapinyourassI'mverywhiteindeedbutIcanstillrapfastasfucksosuckmynutsIalwaysplaythefastrappersbecauseyouallsucktoomuchtorapfastasfucklikemeeventhoughI'mwhite!

Kanye West
Kanye... (Choir: Kanye!)

Kanye! (Choir: West!)

There's only room for one asshole! (Choir: And that's Kanye!)

I take Eminem- (Choir: And he removes his panties!)

Kanye has a choir! Kanye gets the bitches!

Eminem takes little kids and gets into their breeches

Now excuse me while I fondle Eminem's sweet daughter!

(Choir: Kanye's going to fondle her until her boobs are hotter!)

Hailie Mathers
You wanna fondle me? Well first you gotta get lubed up!

Cause I'm tight! Tiiiight! We'll do it in the bath? Rub a dub dub!

Eminem
Goddamnit Hailee, I thought I was gonna be your first!

Well, if you can't beat 'em, beat off! I hope you have thirst!

Joe Jonah Jameson
Wait! Are we having a rapper royale?

What happened to six pack?

Six pack
My name is Val!

Joe Jonah Jameson
I don't even fucking

Roll the credits!

Lisa Nova
WON WHO?

NEXT WHO'S?

DECIDE YOU!

BOB COULDN'T ARSED TO COME WITH ANOTHER WORD MASHUP FOR THIS SHIT!

TUPAC'S GAY!

Lil Wayne
Tupac backwards is Caput!

Tupac
Lil Wayne backwards is Enyaw Lil

That'll be all

WON WHO? A Six Pack and his Women Tupac and Biggie Lil Wayne Nicki Minaj Jay-Z Snoop Dogg The ERB Crew Eminem Kanye West Hailie Jade Scott Mathers Joe Jonah Jameson Lisa Nova My Erect and Throbbing Pinecone Stephen Fry A Penis Fly Trap An Unlikely Team of Professor Layton and Adolf Hitler

I think I just lost a couple million brain cells and several IQ points