User blog:SkeepTieel/Scrapped PvAs - Epic Rap Battles: Ponies vs Anything

As you know, I own a rap battle series called Epic Rap Battles: Ponies vs Anything that originated on the wiki but soon became a YT series which produced five battles. Unfortunately due to having to work on CMRB + laziness and loss of motivation in the series, I've decided to scrap the series and make a new YT series in collaboration with my cool friend.

So what does a Skeep do with all these spare pony battles clogging up his Google Documents? He goes back to his roots and posts them on the wiki.

Monster Kid vs Scootaloo
yeaaah an Undertale battle for my MLP series. neat

Beat
http://picosong.com/QdtR/

Written by SkeepTieel and Eddie

Scootaloo
Prepare for a beatdown, ‘cause Scootaloo is here to school

this kid whose greatest use to Frisk was being a footstool

I’ll leave you to Waterfall in my flows that’s just 1 out of 3

So Scraggy should better CHECK himself before steppin’ to me

I’ve a Heart Stronger Than Horses that would make Aaron flex out

Don’t need your Free EXP, my scooting skill checks out

Seems you’ve came in un-armed, with nothing but Cutie Re-Marks (ha!)

I’m Asriel as it gets! You’re Show Stopped by Diamond Tiara

Monster Kid
Yeah, I’m disobedient, it’s ‘cause I’m not a handicapped chicken

This reptilian’s quick to block the path of thick heads to kick in

Yo, I’m giving you the boot and embracing your Love of Pain!

Your Gast-ly perverts on Rule 34 leave me Shades of Gray

Step forward to me? Dude, I’ll make you quiver anxiously

‘Cause man, your verse made me want to faceplant intentionally

I’m throwing more shade when what I spit throws you under

I have Undyne to protect me! This flightless Plane’s plain Tsunder

Rainbow Dash
I’ve got to hand it to you, kid, you sure are one to antagonize

Your behaviour’s more puzzling than who you like to idolize

I’m loyal and modest, you’re a fan of sushi who’s quite haughty

No offense, this ain’t a battle ‘til this freshwater gets salty

If you can’t handle the heat; ya should’ve picked a better idol

I’ll beat this child and his hero who’s in unbridled denial

I’ve got a Letter for Undyne, what I’ll address is plain and true

When it comes to the toughest, Gerson’s a Tank compared to you

Undyne
NGAAHH! Get your own diss material! A Battle Against a True Hero

Land hits perfected like Papyrus, send you flying through my window

Brittle Gerson pony person, hibernated permanently

Even the Flowey Fan Club sounds less sickening than you’ll ever be

I spit Undying disses that leave you more burnt than how I cook

Step into my neighbourhood and I’ll intimidate you more than Napstablook

Compared to this salty hothead, Hotland I’d way prefer more than you

How does it feel when kids represent your Element better than you do?

We Bare Bears vs Rock Pie Sisters
Written by SkeepTieel and Matthew (STOC)

Beat
http://picosong.com/83Pw/

Grizzly
I’ve got this! Just one and the odds are still stacked against you

When it comes to battling, we’ll be there to take down all three of you

We bring raps like a picnic, you bring raps animals wouldn’t eat

I’ll devour ya like pizza, but you’re only worth the backseat

Panda
Pass the mic Grizz, and I’ll leave these three crying to their mother

We better Brother Up, in order to smother these rock lovers

You can’t compare to our Tote Lives, so leaving this is a must

Since it won’t take forty five man years to crush these rocks into dust

Ice Bear
Ice Bear spits pure poetry when pitted unprepared ‘gainst pebbles

Ice Bear will heckle feral rebels ‘til these snowflakes don’t feel special

This Ice Bear spits so feverishly, you could say Ice Bear’s spittin’ sickly

You’re deemed so unimportant, you share a page on your wiki

Marble
Uh, you bet-

Limestone
Move it, punk! This is my turf and my win!

You better find a way to shut that trap like the fridge you sleep in!

I spit lyrical Holder’s Boulders and it’s way too much to handle

You being brothers is as silly as being related to an Apple

Marble
I’ll speak for myself, these ‘primal beings’ are too underwhelming

But seems we all need a Big Mac to keep our sanity from bending

Sure we’re all not well-rounded, but all your edges are imperfect

You’ll surely be Occupied when you’re sent deep underneath the surface

Mmhm.

Maud
Spit some more fault lines, ‘cause you’ll be the one at fault

Leave you more washed up and crushed that’ll you’ll just be pure salt

More wildlife than domesticated that it just bewilders me

I have rocks more interesting than this mix of me and Trixie

Grizzly
We’ll bring ya down when our rap’s weight gets to you when we’re finished

Your use in the series is as important as your business

Panda
Dominate an Amish family, so to the Road you’d start to run

But these rocks can’t really talk, they’re just as cushy as Miki-chan

Ice Bear
Keep running your one-liner lips and Ice Bear will rip them straight off

Feeding Ice Bear a burger won’t help Ice Bear to go soft

All
We spit fire so hot, we’re sending you back to where you came from

We see more of a diamond in the rough than you guys in Tom

Limestone
They say home is where the heart is, yours is structured rock to paper

So let me unleash my rage and call me a Hearthbreaker

Marble
Sorry, but sneezing on the mic won’t really help you defeat me

Not a Meme-Con or cute comp, in rap you need to be Grizzly

Maud
Sedimentary, hollow; your living space is more lively

You three are all about as tasteful as rock soup could ever be

You say you have it in the bag; I’ve got this simply in my pocket

All
We’ve shook this Ponypalooza-

Maud
...or Rocked it, to be honest

Marble
Mmhm.

Johnny Appleseed vs Applejack
Written mostly by my friend named Kris. Helped by Zander Peers and SkeepTieel

Beat
http://picosong.com/KPd2/

Applejack
YIHAA! Ready for your Last Roundup? Here´s the Mane Attraction!

An “American Legend” ‘gainst an Equestrian legend ain't even a fraction!

Applebuck Season, nursery rhyming rock gardens that left me stolid!

I put your rhymes Pot-in-Pot, since they grow pothead solid!

Generous? Kind? Simple, your ways are as kind as a Rarity Gem!

Your legacy’s censorship’s like a tradition when it was Hem!

Crazy Dave, It's time that I plant this zombie running Everfree!

And I´ll call my bro to present your future, you´re past, see?

Appleseed
Who´s a silly alcoholic pony? Her name is Apple-Teeny!

I found your Apples to the core, with a “Golden Delicious” Victory!

Take ya back to the Stars light where you weren't a background character!

Take a bite and chuck out yet another really bad ‘spitter’

Who can’t voice hard bars; while I spit them hard as my cider

This horse’s hide better hide or go cry on the inside, liar

Unlike myself, you don’t seem so down to earth, pony

Cash cow who is treated like my 176-year-Old Tree!

Applejack
You're making a battle of bonkers but I´ll show y´all how the Apples won!

Or I´ll turn it to a Sweet Apple Massacre, to the church run!

Cranky´s Slice of Life was lonely even if he jumped the shark!

Another Flim & Flam dead, just a walk through Appleseed Park!

Appleseed
This mare didn't do well to hide her mask of pure negation!

Sis is Blooming as a McEntire Reb-ell for such Cyrus Inspiration!

Your writers must have Spiky Trouble Shoes, like your family!

Without Derpy you ain´t funny, that's the real element of Honesty!

DHMIS vs MLP
The intended finale for PvA. Disclaimer: This battle was written prior to DHMIS 6 so my choice for the final character doesn't really make sense

Beat
http://picosong.com/ECJe/

Written by SkeepTieel, Robotic Operating Apple, Austin Green, GIR 5 Life, TruthBrood, Anthony Perry, Zander Peers, Iamthelegion, Walkthroughepicness, Eddie and Jimmy Painter

Twilight
Welcome to Equestria! Show Stoppers to make your clocks stop

Inflated ego-filled hot-aired heads like yours are surely ones to pop

Pinkie Pie
Your practical effects ruins any horror that it uptakes

Cook your rhymes up like raw chicken and bake you like my cupcakes

Rainbow Dash
A race against the clock, but the results will be anticlimactic

Wouldn’t waste ten seconds with you, I find more fun watching static

Twilight
You surely got us shocked, especially with your weird Padlock!

All
These clowns will be nothing than a wasteland 'cause these nursery rhymes are for Mock!

Yellow Guy
Wow, look, girl toys! They're lonelier than me

You’ll really be needing HELP if you try to beat us DHI-emcees

Bird Guy
I’ll squish these pesky fillies and then eat them up for lunch

Don’t even run away and cry, or these chicken’s I’ll have to munch

Red Guy
Stop mucking around, your personalities are wood stiff

Looks like there’ll be more logs in the trash bin by the end of this

All
The gorey lore driven force that break these ponies To The Core

Each time we beat you more and more to send you back to the drawing board

Rarity
There’s nothing tackier than what you call your digital fashion

Applejack
So end with this act, or we’ll knock you all the way to Manehattan

Fluttershy
You’re the real raw chickens, but I’d like to see you Cocka-try

Rainbow Dash
And we’ll be robbing Robin’s life when we take this to the skies!

Pinkie Pie
I’ll make that Pesky Birdie become cupcakes on this Part-

Beat stops for a moment

Nah, It`s not worthy...

Twilight Sparkle
We may be Little Ponies to you,

Rarity
But we ain’t afraid to get dirty

All
Stacking the hate with dead-lines. so cryptic messages we’d start crackin’

THIS IS IT! You're the less Ap-Pelling worst thing that could Happen!

Bird Puppet
You all spit Baked Bads! We can’t see any fashion behind Rarity’s door!

Red Puppet
These whines were a bore, I can’t stand them anymore, we’ll show you true gore

Yellow Puppet
We’ll make you our Minions, then serve these whinny whiners with oats

Red Puppet
Your Rule 34 is more appalling than your mistreatment of goats

Bird Puppet
We are going to miss this show, it’s watched by men without brains

Yellow Puppet
Then we’ll roast this marshmallow pony over King Malcom’s remains

Wow.

Red Puppet
Those raps were pretty boring,

Bird Puppet
we don’t mean to be rude

All
But your fan creations are abominations, a weirder side of YouTube!

Discord
I could say the same about you but that would make too much sense

You’ll need a “Kickstart” to your raps when I patronize this pamphlet

Forget your shock factor, I petrify ponies ‘til they’re stiff and white

But I’d love to see you try, so let’s put our creative differences aside

Spitting blue as flu and create a little grimdark genocide

I’m spreading more than just a Cough, though, better run away and hide

This was a piece of cake, but I doubt you have the guts to deal with the hell that is myself

But, why, why ruin a completely perfect portrait of yourself?

Notepad
Let's get creative! Not like your immoral pandemonium

Grab a bucket filled with ink and shove it down your brain and cranium

A tiny Glass of Water is your weight in gold and sprinkles

So slow it down my friend, ‘cause your “friendship attempts” are fickle

What can you see? If you open your mind, you’ll see your defeat

So learn to take an inside joke, ‘cause your humor is set in concrete

Your antics are like my facial expressions, never ever changing

I could hardly call you an inspiration; you're uncreative like green and Changelings

Chrysalis
Go appease your king, sleaze, beating me will prove to be less than a breeze

I’ll hex, perplex and slice this pesky bee like a piece of cheddar cheese

I’m a criminal, subliminal individual, you’re naught but a butterfly, common

Show you the downside of love, when I come at you faster than the Secretariat Comet

Chrysalis disses with viciousness, you overdid the photosynthesis

Once again skinning this caterpillar with my Canterlot dissidence

This Day I’ll tell you that I’ll suck all your love to destroy

When I deploy my Changelings, run back to your special one, Roy!

Shrignold
Tryna battle me? This lonely bug’s an amorphous travesty

Your verse has more holes in it than you do in your anatomy

Metamorphous aborted failure fried like her skin in the sun

Your “invasion” is hardly a crisis; while your identity is one

Wedded failure, Mrs Dead? We can understand what you’re feeling

But compared to this ugly, weak freak, Michael seems more appealing

This victory’s rigged, welcome to our cult, Mrs Shrig-alis

Our only conditions is that you must most forcefully forfeit this

Trixie
You wish to challenge The Great Trixie? I'll school you in rhyme and magic,

I'm sure that the loss of all of your lives in this duel will be abruptly tragic

Rapping you is time misused, my win’s a hat-trick I’ll produce

So it’s Time to Boast Bust you, but you’ve already got some screws loose

You’re jealous, ‘cause it seems better logic gets you pissed

This unicorn’s gifted; while you’re just like a cheap birthday gift

I can make this clock a Grandfather without needing Snips and Snails

I’m out, I don't have time for these unbearable major fails

Tony the Talking Clock
There's not enough time for me to stand that limerick

Fluttershy, grow up and quit that timorous gimmick

You're running out of time I suggest you lose quicker

Rainbow Dash, be honest, you're just a flank licker

You don’t fool me; your magic tricks needs work on their deception

Don’t be stupid, friendship’s just a construct of human perception

Tell Applejack this is cereal business, Trix are for kids, you’ll get smoked

When Tony pours a grrreat load of oats down your throat

Princess Luna
You’ve been graced with the presence of the Princess of the Night

Against mannequins that wouldn’t even startle Fluttershy

I’m truly a Night Mare, though I’ve turned the other cheek

Make this colt’s cult love me, like his name was Pipsqueak!-

Gilbert
DJ, spin the beat, just like how I spin around

Make an April Fool out of you without making a sound

I get you've been banished to the moon, but please calm down

I'll teach you a lesson on how to turn that frown all the way rou-

Nightmare Moon
You insentient foals! How dare you interrupt me!

What an error to participate in this event so buggy

You dropped the bar for your planet, while I raise the moon up high

I reckon you’re a bit jealous, I’m the Princess of the Night

I’ve stepped up my Luna Game, so it’s best if you forfeit

Have you glitched and screaming and leave your bodies distorted

You’re just Flying in Circles; my rap’s gravity is limitless

My door leads to success; and I don’t need to repeat this

Colin the Computer
Hello, my name’s Colin, a computery guy

Computing this bouts results with a blink of my eye.

Results: You’re the type to be banished to the blood moon

I'll need some info from you, my raps will pop this blue balloon

Go back to "horn play" with your sissy! You can't diss me!

Your rhymes miss me! Hands of missy! ...DON'T TOUCH MEEEEE!

It seems that Loony and her Pals will face a true fright!

‘gainst Sloan’s Pro Puppet army. Just call THIS your Nightmare Night!

Can
Are you desperate? Cancellations where you’re headin’!

(Doo-doo-do-do-do) You’re even worse than your fandom!

Meat
Starting beef with meat? That will make your teeth go all grey!

No unhonest rumors will compare to the outcome of this fray

Both
You’re a “nightmare” to stand! We “can” not take these lun-y kiddie toys

One joke later and your fans are still middle aged boys!

Fridge
Your rhyme scheme seems to need some healthier alternatives

We’ll turn these horses into glue, throw them out like garbage

Diamond Tiara
I’m certainly “Filthy Rich”, but I’m most definitely not garbage!

Discarding devious scraps of food that make the rich like us go starving!

Silver Spoon
This Silver Spoon’s ‘bout to blow off your lid, but it seems you were born with it

So don’t talk about “fancy show-offs” when you are ones, you hypocrites

Spoon/Tiara
We’re royalty with loyalty here to Spoon-feed you the essential:

TOP STORY! Best thing since sliced bread? You winning is Confidential!

Babs
No spelling mistakes could match the accent of your ignorant selves

I’m raining on your parade; no cliffhanger to know that you fell

King Sombra
Corrupted; I’m toxic; locked in; mics; I rock them

Plan’s to control all of Equestria and there’s no way you will stop it

My heart’s pure crystal, while your gravelly core just fuels my rage

Haunt Crystal Ponies to this day while your fame is fading away

King Malcolm
Enough of your dabbling for I’ll leave you in shambles

Thou must feed me gravel, or my anger shall unravel

You’ve haven’t needed to prop yourself up, but the tables have been turned

As the scene closes for the credits, my legacy shall always burn

???:
(MONEY, MONEY, MONEY, MONEY)

Lord Tirek
I am the centaur of attention, a godly entity

You’re just a janitor who smells of dead rats and gasoline

You’re reluctant on abducting me, I intimidate ‘til you cease to function

Is he friend or is he foe? Doesn’t matter, I’m a god of destruction

Failed Snuff film director posers ain’t even close to being horror

I damn you to Tartarus, where you’ll find true pain and torture

Sporadic spastic hacks won’t even dare to hold a hammer

You’re about to be Ti-rekt, and your manner fuels my anger

Money Man
This Mortal’s Kombat method sucks, go back to your brother Scorpan

So, fuck off, Kneesocks, or meet this garbage man’s garbage can

I’ll show you a twist when you’re tied down in your dad’s basement

You got banished by Skittle magic, then sent back to containment

Demented tongue twister twisted, you’re not an a grade wiz-kid

Heckling ponies with lack of friendship…? Oh, I’m so threatened!

So, feeling unlucky? Check the date: June the 19th (eeee)

There’s many lessons to learn, but you’re not invited to the party

Sweeney Todd vs Pinkamena Diane Pie (Ponypasta Royale)
Ponypastas vs Anything:

Pinkamena vs Sweeney

Fluttershy's Lullaby vs Hypno's Lullaby

Rarity's New Dress vs Ed Gein

Apple Peeler vs Leatherface

Rainbow Factory vs Dr Bright

The Experiments of Twilight Sparkle vs Dr Alphys

Beat
http://picosong.com/APxh/

Only lyrics written:

Apple Peeler
I’m spitting the sickest disses that’ll burn through your thick Leatherface

Can’t get through my core when I obtain more masks for this masquerade

No need for cannibalistic pastries when I eat your flesh like a virus

Rarity’s knows what up, but Mr Leatherface ain’t that stylish

Leatherface
Let's hitch-hike up the ratings by taking this Southern

It's a Texas Chainsaw Massacre though I bring it in sullen

You took down a Derpy messup, that's nothing big about that

Supposed to be horrorcore? You still get bronies to Applejack

You really can't sew, can barely stitch together a verse

I'm sure you'd try to rope me in but you don't get what hurts

Chainsaw lines are really cutting, I'll have you with a hook

Here's the Shocking Truth: I could never fear this sook

Beat
http://picosong.com/hSrX/

Starlight
You’re steppin’ in Our Town, I present equality abundant

It seems a talentless bare-flank is my puppet like his fake governments

Spare me your sentimental nonsense, this Mayor’s sure to leave a Marx

Had more impact than your Bolshevik wrecks in a two episode story arc

I’m known for dissing the dissident, what I’m spittin’s harsher than discipline

Shine bright than Star-light, fright like a shadow in the Twilight, while your future’s looking grim

-

So ill-tempered and self-centered, yet others do your dirty work

Stalin
-

So let me take the lead and release a Cold War in your wasteland

See this warfare take effect once you’re left more pale than your residents

If you weren’t granted mercy, let’s see how you’d Amend your Fences

Starlight
Oh, how unintelligent are you, even thinking of trying to compete

For all your verse you tried so hard, but is filled with ego-filled deceit

What differs our similarities and sameness is your saneness

Authority you usurped and wasted, then this sadist became nameless

Stalin
Seem so eager to flee from here, but you’re cuffed in to stop Russian

As punishment, I’ll leave you muffled out with your own muffins shoved in

Seen more devious plans made by this dimwit from Sunset Shimmer

-

Celestia vs Ra
nothing for this battle was ever made except for this pretty cool beat lol

http://picosong.com/AssS/