User blog:JMitch25/Shantae vs. Alien Hominid - Occasional Rap Battles that Exist



Hello, and welcome to another installment of my shite series that only so many of you seem to view. And here we have another stupid fight, now using an unused character again. Shantae was already used by 0ShadowStories, so yeah. But hey, it’s at least the first time someone used her in a released battle as a main fighter. So, anyway, Shantae, the half-genie hero from the series of the same name, whips it against Alien Hominid, the first flash character in gaming, in a battle between well-praised-yet-not-so-noticed videogames inspired by other legendary games (Metroid for Shantae, Contra for AH) that would transition into the indie market. Yeah, that’s a stupid link, but I’m all about stupid, so whatever. Couldn’t find a backdrop of any of AH’s levels, so I had to cut corners and use a substitute.

Cast
Lily Singh as Shantae

JT Machinima as Alien Hominid (voice)

Dan Paladin animating Alien Hominid

Realio dealio
Occasional Rap Battles that Exist! vs... Press start!

Shantae

I shall wash up yellow ET with Dribble Stone flow

Because magic or no, in rap, I'm ret-2-go!

'bout to flip the Mighty Switch on some Person who's the Pits

Best watch me whip since my hair is known for sinking ships

I’ve got expansive islands, you’re a linear, short plow

Characters full of charm while your humor’s lowbrow

Facing me's Risky, and if you want Revenge, you'll get spanked flat

Since I withstand more pain; one hit kills you at the drop of a hat

Compared to your game, I think you'll be a TS in this brawl

Since you'll likely Monster Milk the verse and break like my fourth wall

Alien Hominid

I'm coming stacked with raps that cut through all like lasers

So gaming's Fresh Duchess of Bel-Air won’t Dance through this Danger

My sweet rhymes strike you down like a butterscotch blob

Call out my lowbrow humor? Your games have scanty chicks, you knob!

Dropping endless rap grenades as I rock the Lighthouse

Rumble in my Newgrounds, and it'll be lights out!

I'm a classic website's icon; you started off a game for hire

You'd need forms and pirate gear to try and handle me. Shots fired!

I've had my struggles in trying to get back my ship

But a half-genie beating me? Fat chance there, Kid!

Shantae

You say you have good raps, but we know your ammo's limited

These days, you're a has-been; in platformers, I’m definitive

You come with a knife, but I'll be one to cut this short

So it's best you move, bitch! Get out the WayForward!

Alien Hominid

You can't even keep your job, I'd say your fame's pretty brief

I'll climb under the ground and pull you six feet underneath

Say what you will; this Behemoth has a bigger legacy leadin'

I mean, it's not the first Smashing where you end up beaten

WHO WON?

WHO’S NEXT?

VOTE NOW OR LATER!

Occasional *gets shot down by rapid blaster shots and then gets sucked up by a lamp* *muffled* Rap Battles that Exist!

Did You Know Rapping feat. this perverted asshat
Shakira bellydancing - Bellydancing is a well-known gimmick in the Shantae games sans Shantae 3; also, Shakira and Shantae share the first 3 letters of their names

Bayonetta - She’s known for making use of her hair (mainly as a sexy jumpsuit) like Shantae, and she is also known for using guns like Alien Hominid; also, correlation with the Smash Ballot

Marcianito - Aliens

Donkey Kong - Donkey Kong’s source of strength is his hair (because) as seen in the show; to clarify this, I linked Hair by The Cowsills; Shantae’s main weapon is her ponytail

Hey, this battle came out before I used 10 hints, bizarre

Who was the least shit? Shantae Alien Hominid

GUESS THE HINTS AND WIN A HIGH SCORE ON SUPER PITFALL