User blog:DexterMaximus/Epic Rap Battles of History: NicePeter vs EpicLLOYD

I decided to write my own version of the Season 1 finale, Peter Alexis Shukoff vs Lloyd Ahlquist. Well then, let's go.

Cast
NicePeter as himself

EpicLLOYD as himself

MC Mr. Napkins as himself

Dante Cimadamore as himself

George Watsky as himself

Battle
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!

NicePeter!

VS!

EpicLLOYD!!!

BEGIN!

Peter-

Cool raps, Ahlquist

Try messing with NicePeter you'll be so pissed

How many raps does it take

To turn a series into a union of hip-hop distaste

It's a disgrace what you what you did to the US people

I beat your ass when you played Hitler, so evil

You bring shame to London, or Texas

So bow to to Peter Alexis

You midget motherfucker, messed in the mind

We built a super series, but you paid the price

With the endless destruction of beats & rhymes

You're a credit steal, but I beat you all night

You're a big dick, Ahlquist, so you get the prize

for biggest loser, just leave, and get a wife

Lloyd-

Look into my eyes, you power-crazed bitch

I am the original idea, you're a technical hitch

You think I give a fuck about me having no wife?

You've probably been single, all your fucking life

You got of easy when I called on Skrillex

Because these raps are much to complex

All the Streamy's, complex, all your dumb raps, complex!

All the times you called me a...midget? complex!

Crush you for days, till you call a truce

Stop making a racket, It'll be a deuce

Pride of Napkins, took Snoop outta the picture

Drop a hammer on you harder than I rapped as Hitler


 * MC Mr. Napkins jumps down from nowhere*

Napkins-

I have no pride for you

Who ruined everything my rapping skills where doing

For Sherlock Holmes!

I thought the Time Lord and Batman

And the rapping masses

have sent me here to shoot a beat against both of yo asses

Let me start with you there, Peter, so fine

Looking like something killed by Frankenstein

It's hip-hop power, I'll win, with my might!

Cause Pete's girl can't do shit tonight!

And Lloyd, you were supposed to be my best friend, man

But your loyalty shrivelled up like your fucking bell-end, man!

Series 2 was bright! You let your heart grow a dark notion!

And stopped the greatest thing since you didn't do motion!


 * knock knock knock knock*

????-

Did somebody say Dante Motion?

Dante-

Yo, I'm like a ghost when I beat yo two hosts

And you weird-hair assholes, with hearts of cold

Shook hands with both rappers

Either good or crappers, no doubt

If you rap in the series, time to get out

I have the balls to do the sound my way, playa!

Now we tear down that fourth wal. bitch yea!

You two need yoga (ya) you need to shuddup for an hour

And you all need to learn how to rap with fucking power

????-

Did somebody say rapping power?

Watsky-

Da, you want to mess with me

I spit fast raps so bow to me

I'm a pale kid, who spit bars

So all of you, get back in your cars

and get the fuck out of my neighbourhood

Bitch!

My name is Watsky, and I am a Time Lord

Slamming these bitches like Genghis' horde

I don't play by the rules, dont' make me Putin

ha!

Cause when Watsky raps your ass fast, you won't know what your doing

sucka!

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

EPIC epic RAP rap...


 * two voices at the same time*

BATTLES OF HISTORY!!!!

Message From Da Author, Bi-Atch!
Look, I know it wasn't my best, and Watsky was a little hard to form lines for, but, meh, who the fuck cares?

Poll
Who Won? NicePeter EpicLLOYD MC Mr. Napkins Dante Cimadamore George Watsky