User blog:Hippie Rat/Mike Tyson vs Rocky Balboa

The Italian Stallion battles Iron Mike in a match that isn't exactly boxing.

Lyrics
Announcer:

Epic Rap Battles of History! Mike Tyson vs Rocky! Begin!

Rocky Balboa:

I got the eye of the tiger, lightning-fast martial artist,

While this oldie should stick to fighting those damn rape charges.

The Italian Stallion is battling as valiant as a whole battalion,

And Rocky's the champion meandering away with the medallion.

Come in swinging and dissing all you want, I got that granite chin,

Fucked up Mr. T, I'll take Mike T and banish him.

I'll make sure all those hits you take won't let you move forward,

I'll beat you so hard you won't remember like Hangover.

Mike Tyson:

Challenging Mike Tyson is gonna be Rocky's folly,

I kill in the ring like Drago, hot-headed enough to knock out Ali.

While this the guy played a spoof of himself boxing Raging Bull in Grudge Match,

And he's got the same speech impediment as that dude from Caddyshack.

Suckers stepping up to stomp Tyson sends me to insanity,

I'm scarier than spiders, don't sell me short, can't smoke me with any strategy.

Like jab, jab, cross, hook, uppercut,

I bang your face like Dynamite, Tyson'll fuck you up.

Rocky Balboa:

You're one to talk about parodies, you won't make it out of this ring alive,

After fighting Fifty Shades of Grey in Scary Movie 5.

I'm swift, skilled, and stealthy like Assassin's Creed,

And I come back and win like fighting Apollo Creed.

While you rock a tattoo and broken teeth, biggest failure boxing's ever seen,

Teaming up with a pigeon to solve knockoff Sherlock Holmes mysteries.

Cause now you can't fight, you're old, rusty iron, Mike,

Blind in one eye, I can still knock out Kid Dynamite.

Mike Tyson:

Psh, you're fighting porn stars, crossed the Mason-Dixon, chugging against Smirnoff,

I'm spitting disses that'll leave you wishing I'd bite your ears off.

I'm a savage motherfucker, faster caster and master of peek-a-boo,

I got beef like Tyson Foods, fool!

You're a joke, I'm a tiger, mauling this Italian mare,

You don't know shit I go through, for your bullshit, Mike Tyson don't Care.

And I can thank Allah for having me win this rap bout,

Because Rocky Balboa just got Punched Out!!

Announcer:

Who won? Who's next? You Decide! Epic Rap Battles of History!

Poll
Who won? Rocky Mike Tyson