User blog:Hippie Rat/Marvel vs Team Fortress 2

The spiritual successor to Deadpool vs Scout, this battle features the entire Team Fortress team going against Marvel characters that relate to the respective class. Deadpool battles Scout once again as the two loudmouths, Captain America and the Soldier battle as the patriots, Human Torch and the Pyro battle as the two firestarters, Nick Fury and Demoman as the black dudes with eyepatches, Hulk and the Heavy battle as the giant brutes, Iron Man and the Engineer battle as the technologists, Wolverine and the Medic battle as the healers, Hawkeye and the Sniper battle as the sharpshooters, and Spider-Man battles the Spy as the masked "Spi-"s.

Lyrics
Announcer:

Epic Rap Battles of History! Marvel vs Team Fortress 2! Begin!

Scout:

Grass grows, birds fly, I hurt people,

Even if you can't die, my raps are lethal.

Soldier:

I spit it cold enough to freeze a superhuman,

Finish you like the war and Harry S. Truman.

Pyro:

Yo I'm the igniter and the nightmare,

I giveth and I taketh, make you fight scared.

TF2 Offense:

We bring pain and destruction wherever we go,

We'll beat your ass faster than I push a payload.

Deadpool:

Hola, me llamo pescina de la muerte,

How can you fight me if you can't even fight your brothers?

Captain America:

You belong in a zoo. Art of War by Sun Tzu:

I don't have to fight to subdue you.

Human Torch:

Flame on! You're a psycho maniac, can't douse me,

I mean, you sound like that dude from South Park, Kenny.

Marvel Offense:

We're fantastic! Can't quite avenge that,

Badasses kicking bad asses while you capture the flag.

Demoman:

Aye, you wanna assemble motherfuckers, do ye?

Well the fable may be grim but me bombs are sticky!

Heavy:

So you think you're a smart little scientist, outsmart bullet, bitch,

Now I am hungry, I need sandvich.

Engineer:

I put my sentries out, bring the offense havoc,

Please, people care about you more when you're a song by Black Sabbath.

TF2 Defense:

We can just sit back and watch as we torment,

As you fail to push past our assortment of reinforcements.

Nick Fury:

I hear you rapping, but given that you're stupid I'm going to ignore it,

You're a drunken, black, Scottish, cycloptic, little bitch.

Hulk:

Hulk smash little communist clown,

Defeat puny Misha in any showdown.

Iron Man:

Just like the suits, I make my rhymes in bulk,

You have an army? We have a Hulk.

Marvel Defense:

Your little war games, are Call of Duty, but less sophisticated,

You dumb motherfuckers can't beat the Avengers Initiative.

Medic:

I'll X out this X-Man, make you see stars,

Your little cat claws do nothing when I'm übercharged.

Sniper:

Sniping's a good job, got the rifle and the huntsman at my pick,

Go back to flogging to pictures of that Black Widow chick.

Spy:

I'll stab back backstab, the dead ringer liar,

Quicker wits than your spidey sense, I'm not scared of spiders.

TF2 Support:

Le petite chienne, Jarate piss jar!

You'll need the support cause I'm fully charged.

Wolverine:

Oh please, what you gonna do, shoot me with medicine?

I don't need that shit, I got that adamantium skeleton.

Hawkeye:

You're cheap, camping, killing players from across the map,

You're a piss jar, either that or a sack of crap.

Spider-Man:

I'm Spider-Man! I do whatever a spider can!

You're a disgrace to Redmond and Blutarch Mann.

Marvel Support:

Persistent, vigilant, we're superhuman,

You wannabe mercenaries could never match up to these mutants.

Team Fortress 2:

Step to the Fortress Team, we'll leave you pumped and leaded,

We know what you have planned just by watching after the credits.

Weapons? Check our inventory, we got a farrago,

We'd rather read Detective Comics than watch for Stan Lee cameos.

Marvel:

Oh please, you'd be banned for spamming chat,

You think we're threatened by a bunch of dudes obsessed with hats?

You're a mod and an expansion, your cartoon's free to play,

You guys have reached your expiration date!

Announcer:

Who won? Who's next? You Decide! Epic Rap Battles of History!

Poll
Who won? Marvel Comics Team Fortress