User blog:Dark Cyan/CyGIR Rap Battles 6: Hannah Montana vs Poppy

Hello, everyone. And welcome to CyGIR Rap Battles!

We're off our hiatus! Time to celebrate! Or just nod, go 'cool.' and don't click on this. Either's fine.

This battle pits fictional Disney Channel Popstar Hannah Montana against fictional Youtube Popstar ThatPoppy. A lot of you you may not have heard of Poppy. Stop reading this, go and watch her videos, then come back. You're welcome.

If you don't get a lyric, ask about it in the comments. Links mess with the colour scheme and we cannot be arsed with rap meanings.

Enjoy!

Beat: This

Hannah Montana is this colour, Lilly Truscott is this colour, Poppy is this colour, Charlotte is this color, a tiny doll in the likeness of Mikayla is this colour

Hannah Montana
(starts at 0:09)

Let’s get crazy! It’s time for a Hoedown Throwdown, Poppy!

I’m the Princess of Pop! You’re just an Albino Boxxy!

It’s like Uncle Earl said; City folk are mighty strange to a country girl

Half Banksy, Half Thisisit. You’re the worst of both worlds!

I’ve got the hits to eclipse your small-time channel. You’re getting pwned!

Your fans are like your audio, Queen Bee; Too many creepy drones

I’m not entertained if you repeat your name whilst dressed like a bird

But I’ve got some facts to dish out if you wanna get served!

No! Ya think? You’d be queen of the mannequin challenge

Because the only people you talk to are inanimate! Awkwaaaaard!

Poppy
(starts at 0:35)

Hello Internet, I’m Poppy! Your name is Hannah Montana? That’s Cool

From what I’ve heard, everybody wants to be you in your small town school

And that’s nice. Really! I’m not lying to you! It’s nice to receive web affection

But Oh No! It’s raining Pop Rocks, Miley! You should go…and get Protection

Because I’ve heard that’s something lots of rock stars need when things get Thicke, and

You don’t want that so STATIC Oh! Here comes a Transmission!

Hello Poppy, Charlotte here. One question: Do you Think Hannah has changed?

Well, Yeah, but I don’t hate her! It’s just been a while since she’s hit the stage….

And that’s Okay! Poppy prays that soon she gets back to the show!

But certain phrases may get said like “Why won’t they Listen? Where’d everyone Go?”

Hannah Montana
(starts at 1:01)

ThatPoppy say WHAAAAT? You’re a laugh riot honey!

Repeat after me, sweetheart: You don’t make art; you make Money

And that’s a Lowlife to live! Stringing your fan’s around like view puppets!

Delete your Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and then you’ll see I’m Jumping!

Girl, you’ll never walk a mile, if you’re asking stuff like “What are shoes?”

Mud Crunkies! By the way those lines sunk, did your director write your lines too? OOOOOOOOOH

Oh yeah! I went there! Sinclair will drop this project faster than the Mars Argo affair! Chiiill!

Lil, I will once Melanie Martinez here downs those cleaning products she shills!

Poppy
(starts at 1:21)

A rival popstar has invaded my market niche, airtime and space

I will mock the popstar who I do not agree with to their face

I’m standing up for myself by laughing when they get bad reviews

Even though we’re friends in real life. Miley, you hate me, don’t you?

“Sweet Niblets” as a catchphrase? But that’s incomprehensible!

Awww, I thought these 3D glasses worked but you’re still two dimensional…

I’m growing so large, even Pewdie’s viewed me. Not even you can stop me

I don’t want to be like American kids, but they all want to be Poppy

WHO WON? Hannah Montana Poppy