Abe Lincoln

"I never told a lie, and I won't start now!"

- Abe Lincoln

Abe Lincoln battled against Chuck Norris in Abe Lincoln vs Chuck Norris and battled as a third-party rapper against Barack Obama and Mitt Romney in Barack Obama vs Mitt Romney. He also made a cameo in Nice Peter vs EpicLLOYD and Hitler vs Vader 3 as one of Darth Vader's bodyguards. He was portrayed by Nice Peter.

Information on the rapper
Abraham "Abe" Lincoln (February 12, 1809 – April 15, 1865) was the 16th President of the United States of America. Born in a log cabin, he is most known for leading the Union States through the American Civil War, eventually re-uniting the country as one and freeing the slaves through the Emancipation Proclamation. After a series of debates in 1858, Lincoln lost the Senate race in Illinois to his arch-rival, Stephen A. Douglas, but he secured the Republican Party presidential nomination in 1860. With almost no support in the South, Lincoln swept the North and was elected president in 1860, becoming the first Republican president. His election caused seven southern slave states to secede from the Union and form the Confederacy. The Confederate States were defeated in the Civil War after the surrender of Robert E. Lee. Lincoln was later assassinated by John Wilkes Booth on April 14, 1865, 5 days after the end of the war. His face is on Mt. Rushmore in South Dakota, and he's also on the penny and the $5 bill. Lincoln is often considered by historians as one of the greatest presidents of the United States.

ERBoH Bio
Good afternoon, I am the 16th president of these United States. Pleasure to make your acquaintance through this future machine! Besides my top rail beard and first class hat I also saved the Union of our federal government and kept this country afloat. Luckily, I’m a goldarn good orator and in 1863, I gave a speech at Gettsyburg Pennsylvania about human equality that was so darn aces it got my mug on Mt. Rushmore and the penny! Look around, Abraham Lincoln is everywhere! Bully for Honest Abe! Unfortunately, some curly wolf Confederate sympathizer named John Wilkes Booth shot me while I was watching the play, “Our American Cousin.” The play wasn't that great, but I would like to have seen the end. Yours truly and fine as cream gravy, Abraham Lincoln. P.S. Since I get asked all the time, four score means eighty years. You’re welcome.

Verse 1
Four score and 65 years in the past,

I won the Civil War with my beard! Now I'm here to whup your ass!

I've read up on your facts. You cure cancer with your tears?

Well, tell me, Chuck. How come you never sat down and cried on your career?

You're a washed-up has-been on TV selling Total Gyms,

And you're gonna lose this battle like you lost Return of the Dragon!

I'll rip your chest hairs out, put 'em in my mouth.

I'll squash you like I squashed the South!

I never told a lie, and I won't start now!

You're a horse with a limp; I will put you down!

Verse 2
I've got my face on the side of a mountain. You voted for John McCain!

I've got a bucket full of my head, and I'm about to make it rain!

You block bullets with your beard? I catch 'em with my skull!

I'd make fun of Walker, Texas Ranger, but I've never even seen that show!

Barack Obama vs Mitt Romney:
By the power invested in me by this giant bald bird,

The President shall not be the shiniest of two turds!

You! I wanna like you! Don't talk about change, just do it!

I fought for what was on my brain until a bullet went through it!

And you, moneybags, you're a pancake; you're flip-floppity!

It's a country, not a company you can play like Monopoly!

I'll properly reach across the aisle and bitch-smack you as equals!

Of the people, by the people, for the people!

Eagle!

Trivia

 * Abe Lincoln is the first American president to rap in a battle.
 * He is the fourth character to return from a past battle, and the first to rap as a third-party rapper and appear as a cameo.
 * He is also the only participant to be a main participant, a third-party participant and a cameo in three different seasons.
 * He is the second third-party rapper to appear, the first being HAL 9000, and the only one with a title card from the previous installment he appeared on.
 * In Hitler vs Vader 3, Lincoln is seen carrying an axe behind Hitler. He then pushes Hitler towards a plank, attempting to push him into the Great Pit of Carkoon as a Sarlacc awaits with an open maw, parodying Star Wars - Episode VI: Return of the Jedi.
 * He is the only person to have rapped to appear in every season as himself.
 * He and Chuck Norris are the only rappers to have a cut-off title card.
 * They, along with Cleopatra are the only rappers to have different fonts for their title cards.
 * He is the first rapper to appear as a title rapper, a third-party rapper, and a cameo.