User blog:NeoBranwen711/J. Jonah Jameson vs Jimmy Olsen. Detective Comic Rap Battles Series Premiere

you're too slow clock

Hello and welcome to the series premiere of me and Legion's new very original series that is basically DC comics characters vs history.

but it's not avatar's

the title is different, see.

Today we have J.K Simmons best performance in anything except maybe Portal 2, boss of Peter Parker, J. Jonah Jameson, facing off against reporter for the Daily Planet and Superman's biggest pal/fan, Jimmy Olsen, in a battle of a reporter who works with the alter ego of the superhero he loves against a reporter who works with the alter ego of the superhero he hates. Also, J names!

we don't have a beat, i think.

or title cards or cover

maybe later

lets go.

DETECTIVE COMICS RAP BATTLES

J. JONAH JAMESON

VS.

JIMMY OLSEN

BEGIN!

Jimmy Olsen:
Superman's Pal Jimmy Olsen, stepping into Action, Man!

Lit on this fag like the fags he lights shortening his lifespan

You'll Cave, Mr Johnson. Your city needs an Accountant

Trumponomics is solid next to the bills the Spider-Slayers are mounting!

Daily Planet prints Pulitzers in force as a matter of course

But the Bugle only exists for you to blow your own horn!

Your putrid prejudiced rag is a blast to the past

Media used for indoctrination by another man with that 'stache!

J. Jonah Jameson:
Quit your gab, Parker, and bring me pictures of Spider-Man!

We're on the tail of that menace! He's already got red hands!

I'll show the world he's a fraud, catch his villain friends in the act

Wait! You're not Parker! You're that ranga shill for Superman!

I knew the Daily Planet'd come crawling back to the DB

But DC's too weak-kneed! They twice erased Amalgam history!

And where do you get off comparing me with a racist prick?

Snyder blackwashed that punk Perry, he's probably anti-Semitic!

And people complain we're your ripoff, but why bother?

After all! Look what I did to my actual father!

We crushed the Globe, so what do you expect, red?

It's Superman puff pieces against Urich Daredevil spreads!

Jimmy Olsen:
I'm sure to expose you for all your shady backdoor deals

The Bugle hasn't been the Frontline since you lost your Leeds!

Jimmy'll rustle your jimmies, Olsen'll give you an ulcer!

Did you suck Stark's repulsor to give your sales a bolster?

And I can tell that you source your ire from why I'm good at rap

Ask Supergirl or Spider-Man - you hate me because I'm black!

Half your staff are terrorists yet you declare the hero one?

So run to space, away from your abuser - just like your son.

J. Jonah Jameson:
Jacking off a boyscout entitles you to rag on a national hero?

John became a god! You grew up to be a sharkjump tranny weirdo!

I'll have none of that in my establishment! You belong in TMZ!

Jimmy Olsen pictures: Superman's crotch and his cousin's titties!

This vapid vigilante is morally void, encompassed in sin

Fighting the JLA to debauchery with that debutante Harley Quinn!

Your flows are overexposed like your two-bit photography

Where's that runt Parker? He can teach you camerawork properly!

Who's next?!

You Decide!

Detective Comics Rap Battles!

Who won? J. Jonah Jameson Jimmy Olsen