User blog:Hippie Rat/Eastern Animation vs Western Animation

Hello once again. As you may have figured out by my hints, my next battle, the season 2 finale of my series of battles, will be a Super Smash Brothers rap battle. Not just a few fan favorite characters getting verses though. Absolutely everyone is rapping. And this battle is taking so much of my time and energy to the point that I had to completely take a break from writing it to finish writing this. So, here's this battle.

My take at Epic Rap Battles of History's Eastern Philosophers vs Western Philosophers comes in a suggestion that is ever so popular, yet may never come to be with ERB. This of course is Cartoons vs Anime. Personally, I don't watch a lot of either. They both have their pros and cons that I can make fun of. So I had some fun writing this one. Homer Simpson faces off against Light Yagami as the more adult-themed representatives of their teams. SpongeBob SquarePants and Ash Ketchum fight as two very popular characters from their respective sides, two prominent modern shows with a children target audience. Mickey Mouse and Goku go against each other as both are the most influential, pioneering shows in their teams. Following the lead of ERB, the cartoons and animes turn on each other near the end. As usual, we have a key that I had no fun coloring. Now let's get on with the battle!

Key
Mickey Mouse

Homer Simpson

SpongeBob SquarePants

Goku

Light Yagami

Ash Ketchum

Lyrics
Announcer:

Epic Rap Battles of History! Light, Goku, and Ash vs Homer, Mickey, and SpongeBob! Begin!

Western Animation:

Haha! Well hi everybody! It's the animated OGs,

From the most humorous cartoonists. I'm ready!

To decimate these ungodly-drawn pawn-offs of our style,

You're the deformed forms of what I pioneered right down to your triangle smiles.

I can see your future, he satirizing all you punks,

All your shows will be over by the time that we're done.

With the exception of Superboy here, training for days before he starts rapping,

Are y'all ready to cream these trashy freaks? Aye Aye, Captain!

Eastern Animation:

I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear that from Reed Richard's retarded cousins,

We tug heartstrings like cardiac arrest on this glutton.

We're memorable kinds of TV, while you guys grow unfunny,

Got the itty bitty creatures to zap, burn, and bury your stretchy heinies.

We're the go-to shows for punches, blood, and explosions,

Destroy any fools who step to Goku, I'm Dragon Ballin'!

We're timeless, hilarious, dramatic, while you're a close step to,

Dropping dead, fainting, and vaporizing from Light, Ash, and Goku.

Western Animation:

I'm porous and gorgeous, I'll *dolphin sound* you up like a porpoise,

I surfed the Hoff by Neptune's crown, so kneel before us.

I was created by a scientist and backed by the lot of them,

Bring your fire types to me, I got flow like a Water Gun.

Betcha never saw this coming, over twenty five years, fat man's been running,

Leave you looking like Griffin, put my balls on your face, and I'll call it "d'oh! nuttin'".

And I don't do nothing, except be the best when I step to fight Light,

With all that blood and glitter you're like the animated Twilight!

Yo, Geeko, your rapping is the only thing worse than Evolution,

I kicked out Oswald, and your luck ceased to be existing.

And now I bet you wishing that you ain't be dissing the M-O-U-S-E,

If you quit now, you can just pretend you're choking and Freez.

We rock cheap tweening so our flows go smoothly,

While you rock an annoying team of tween dweeb weebs.

Y'all overdraw or underdraw, it's like my movie or mee-hoy-mee,

There's no meet in the middle, just fuck up and then roll it crunchy.

Eastern Animation:

Quit pulling "my leg", I'll turn my hat and turn your tides,

Any walking talking animal is one I gotta add to my,

Pokedex! Ah! Now you're captured; Ah! I'm your master!

Ah! Your rapping is more torturous than hearing your laughter!

Yo, Light's the name, don't wear it out,

Or I'll Note yours and bring Death on your house.

I'm a god wiping away these drawings like chalk,

You're an anthropomorphic, endomorphic laughingstock.

Have you still not figured it out? We read it forwards and backwards,

Kamehame over here, and watch me suspended blast ya.

You're armed with a key, Mickey? Just Saiyan, my Ki is superior,

You act like Asia so bad, y'all are drawn in Korea!

Western Animation:

Well at least our cats ain't just straight-up humans. W e l l. ..

You'll be wide-eyed when you see what happens if you mess with The Simpsons.

Because there's no mofo mo' mellow and yellow in the house! Hmm?

You send a rat to do your fighting, are you a man or a mouse? What?!

I don't see how that's any of your business Mr. Yellow Beer Belly,

When this mouse is ranking higher in popularity every time you turn on the telly! D'oh!

Uh, yo, Disney dude, I don't mean to be rude,

But you need to focus more on beating these weeaboos!

Oh, so now the talking cheese is going to rap me?

I figured you had no backbone the way you "bring it around" the screen.

Oh yeah, rodent? I have a bit more of an abrasive side than you think,

Your only feat is getting your ears to face every place outta sync.

Eastern Animation:

Ha, I knew it wouldn't take long before their teamwork faded.

Yo, Light, pass the Note, they're going to do a lot more than fainting.

You think I'd give my power to some poser in a windbreaker?

You won't be aging for a different reason than keeping a series forever.

You wanna threaten me, that's a bit strange, kinda oddish,

You seem a bit more air-headed than a bag of potato chips.

You wanna anger the gods? Well now ya got me,

I'll smite you in spite, don't mess with Yagami.

Will you two shut up? We're supposed to cypher these Animaniacs,

Or do I have to remind ya how us on Vegeta do payback?

You want in on this, Son? Can't play me like a fool,

When monkey-boy here never even had a teeny bit of grade school.

What? Your new foe is evolving! He is now a Super Saiyan!

You think you stand so tall, call this Attack on Titan!

I hope you learned not to step to Kakarot again,

Or I'll finish all your asses with a Spirit Bomb in the end!

Announcer:

Who won? Who's next? You Decide! Epic Rap Battles of History!

Polls
Which team won? Mickey, SpongeBob, and Homer Goku, Ash, and Light

Who was the ultimate winner? Mickey Mouse Homer Simpson SpongeBob SquarePants Goku Light Yagami Ash Ketchum