Zeus vs Thor



Zeus vs Thor is the forty-eighth installment of Epic Rap Battles of History and the third episode of Season 4. It features the Greek god of Thunder, Zeus, against the Norse god of Thunder, Thor. It was released on November 24, 2014.

Cast
''No live action was used in this rap battle. All characters were portrayed by Lego Minifigures.''

Nice Peter as Zeus (voice only)

EpicLLOYD as Thor and Loki (both voice only)

Zeus
How dare you challenge my immortal throne?

I'm the father of the Gods, put your daddy on the phone!

Maybe Odin could beg me for a truce, 'cause when Zeus lets loose,

I'll put your cross dressing neck in a noose!

I'm like Medusa, I stone a mother fucker if he looks at me wrong!

I'm a bull getting bitches with my swan schlong!

I'm on point like Poseidon's trident.

Rhymes colder than the frosty balls of your giants!

Thor
Allow Thor to retort, you shapeshifting rapist!

And get a taste of this Scandinavian greatness,

Brought forth by my raging thunderstorm force.

'Cause I don't get nice, I get Norse! (Noirse!)

Valhalla-atcha boy and we'll flyte it out!

But keep your Asgard up, I Ragnarök the house!

You tongue kiss your sister, that's grosser than a Gorgon!

I'm the thunder down under; nailing Natalie Portman!

Who would ever worship someone as abusive as Zeus is?

You're ruthless to humans, your crew is like the clash of the douches!

Ruling over the Greeks, a people weak and frightened.

I'd spit in your face but you'd probably like it!

Zeus
Only a mindless fool would knock the fathers of philosophy,

My Greeks built the bedrock of democracy!

With astronomy, they charted out the movements of my kin,

All the pimps of Mount Olympus and me the king pin!

Let this sink in, I'm about to rain on your parade!

Itchy trigger finger quicker with the bolts than Usain!

You're history, I'll be the first to put it in writing!

MC Hammer just got struck twice by greased lightning!

Thor
Rain, old man? This is hardly a drizzle.

You couldn't give the women in my homeland the sniffles.

You can keep your astronomers, I'll sail with the conquerors,

For thousands of kilometers, discovering the continents!

I'm alpha dog dominant, you can't beat me!

I will drop you like Greece's GDP!

Send you deeper underground than the depths of your Hades!

Now make like your daddy and swallow my babies.

Zeus
You think The Underworld scares the ruler of the skies?

You're joking! Loki must have written your lines!

By the time I've finished whipping you with wits and rhymes,

You'll need a lighter for your ship 'cause a viking just died!

Thor
Your glory days are over, the Oracle shoulda told'ya.

I'll kick your wrinkly dick back in your toga like "Opa"!

Here, take these drachma for your eyes,

When you get to River Styx, tell your three headed bitch I say hi. (Woof!)

Thor
You've never been to war with the likes of Thor before!

The oracle should have warned you 'bout the blood and gore!

Brought forth by my raging thunderstorm force,

'Cause I don't get nice I get Norse,

Loki
Noirse!

Thor
Valhalla-atcha boy and we'll flyte it out!

But keep your Asgard up, I Ragnarök the house!

I'm a stone cut stud like I stared down a Gorgon,

Got the thunder down under nailing Natalie Portman!

Who would ever worship someone as abusive as Zeus is?

You're ruthless to humans, the truth is you're the God of douches.

And when we're through with this your hubris will send to Hades!

So make like your daddy and swallow my babies.

Zeus
I'm the father of the Gods, Barbie, mind your manners.

Odin can't touch this, let alone MC Hammer!

Flip more middle fingers at you than a hundred hander.

Take your little tool away, you're just a blonde Bruce Banner!

I'm Olympic gold standard on point like a trident.

Drop science colder than the frosty balls of your giants!

Poseidon couldn't fathom the depth of your thickness.

I bask in the sun, you chose the land of Christmas.

"But I have to save the mortals!" Blech. Blow me.

I'll be boozing on some uzo at the beach with Loki!

There's a 100 percent chance in this weather forecast

of Zeus raining wrath down upon Thor's ass!

Thor
Rain, old man? This is hardly a drizzle.

You couldn't give the women in my homeland the sniffles.

You look miserable; old and fat.

And you grope so many mates you surely have the thunderclap!

It's the swelter for your bullshit, with Leda and Europa.

You shape-shifting rapist, keep your dick inside your toga!

It's over, I'll smash you like an ogre!

Froze the mighty soldier, you're a war carbon copy only older.

Zeus
You call yourself mighty but you're not to my liking.

So I'll strike this weak viking twice with greased lightning!

This blonde shit talker is as soft as Betty Crocker.

I scarred Harry Potter, gave Ben Franklin his shocker‏!

I am the alpha and the O, mega!

You're Thor skinned dick cheddar, smegma!

Conquer the cloud-cold Nectar? Never!

Without the Avengers, you would never be remembered‏!

General

 * This is the first one on one battle of Season 4.
 * This is the first battle where neither the thumbnail nor the iTunes cover shows either rapper at all. Instead, it shows Thor's hammer and Zeus's lightning bolt, likely intended to keep the Lego theme of the battle a surprise.
 * This is the second battle where the iTunes cover does not show either rapper's face. The first was Moses vs Santa Claus. However, the thumbnail for that battle showed both of the rappers' faces, as opposed to this battle still only showing either characters' symbols.
 * This battle features the first Norse rapper.
 * This is the first battle where something was visually censored.
 * This is unless you count the commercial for George Washington vs William Wallace, in which William Wallace had his crotch censored while lifting his kilt.
 * This battle has the most locations (without counting reused footage), with 6 different locations.
 * This battle has the most cameos.
 * However, the cameos are Lego minifigures; they do not have body actors.

Continuity

 * This is the second theological vs theological battle, after Adam vs Eve.
 * This is the fourth battle to feature a comic book superhero. The first four were Batman vs Sherlock Holmes, Goku vs Superman, and Artists vs TMNT. It is the fifth to have a comic book character in general, after Rick Grimes vs Walter White.
 * However, this is the first battle to include a Marvel Comics character.
 * This is the fourth battle to reference MC Hammer or his song "U Can't Touch This", the first three being Gandhi vs Martin Luther King Jr., Goku vs Superman, and Artists vs TMNT.
 * Three of them involve comic book characters.
 * This is the second battle to feature a Wilhelm Scream (when Thor hits the giant), after Darth Vader vs Adolf Hitler 3.
 * This is the first battle to be fully animated.
 * Thor is the fourth character to change forms in mid battle (not counting clothing changes or rapid aging). The others are Gandalf,  Doctor Who and Goku.
 * Thor is the first character to change back, as the change was only for one line.

Production

 * This is the first battle of Season 4 not to have any female rappers, although multiple female cameos do appear.
 * This is the first battle of Season 4 to have no guest rappers.
 * However, it did have guest animators.
 * This is the first and only battle to be made from Lego.
 * The only piece not made from Lego in this video was the pixelated Frost Giant testicles, made from sticky tack.
 * This is the second battle to feature a rapper without a body actor, the first being Steve Jobs vs Bill Gates, in which HAL 9000 was a prop.
 * This battle has the most known scrapped lyrics.
 * Not including the recording sessions or Green Screen cuts, this is the second battle to have more than one Behind the Scenes video. The first was Darth Vader vs Hitler, which had two Behind the Scenes videos.
 * This battle is the second to feature a three-dimensional ERB Logo.The first was Rick Grimes vs Walter White, however, it was animated and did not use LEGOs.
 * There are two pieces of Lego in this video that are from the Lego Harry Potter franchise. One is the Frost Giant, which is the Troll from the Troll on the Loose set, based on a scene from Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone. The other is Cerberus, which is Fluffy, the three-headed dog from the Forbidden Corridor set, also from Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone.
 * ​Additionally, Loki's head piece was from a Gilderoy Lockhart figure.

Errors

 * This is the fifth battle to feature a misspelled title card.
 * In this case, it's Zeus's title card in the BTS pt. 3, misspelled Zues.
 * He is the second rapper to have a title card spelled correctly in the battle but incorrectly in the BTS, after Billy Mays.
 * The other rappers with misspelled title cards are Adolf Hitler, Billy Mays, Christopher Columbus, and Ebenezer Scrooge.
 * During the battle's end slate, the word subscribe is misspelled as subcribe.