User blog:J1coupe/Lost Battle for Christmas: General Tso vs. Colonel Sanders

Well, now I'm back from being kidnapped to a restaurant by friends, I decided to just randomly publish something. I know, I know, I already wrote like 2 battles in a row, but this was written really long time ago, which I picked up re-writing during my hospital days.

So, well, nothing much to say, really. I think if you have been on the wiki long enough or saw Monday Show a lot, you'll know that when Peter saw the suggestion of "Colonel Sanders vs. General Tso" he thought it was hilarious and original but was unfortunately left on a wrong channel (NicePeterToo).

So, I wrote this a while ago, and it sucked pretty bad, so I tried to fix it.

It still sucks.

Since there's no real Christmas Special regarding my video game rap battles, so this is my christmas present-ish rap for you guys, something you can laugh at. Have fun.

General Tso:
Welcome to Golden Dragon, we got General Tso's kick-yo-ass for $4.99!

I'll Kung Pao your fried chicken so that even for Blacks it's out of the line!

My raps are like combination of herbs and spices, bringin' you the flames,

what you spit are too leathery like a Ken-Turkey, man, what a shame!

Can't you see that I'm better than you? you're a Colonel, I'm a General!

My chicken is the Qing, your fatty chicken is just high on cholesterol!

I Kick Fucking Cunts like you, and with your fame that never were,

I'll serve you up quick and swift, Sanders, like a fast food you are!

Colonel Sanders:
Step back, Hurricane Sanders is here to spit fires like Hot Wings,

you will feel real Sour against the Sweet rhymes that I bring!

My chicken fucking rule this world, yours can barely escape New York,

so run back to China, I like to order some yellow rice with extra pork.

Your chicken ain't even Chinese, hell, it's not even yours, how pathetic!

it's filled with so much MSG, I bet by looking at it I'd be Diabetic!

You look like a Broccoli drowned in the sauce, all yellow in the exterior,

so open your eyes, Tso, then you'll see why the White Chicken is superior!

General Tso:
Diabetes? Please, when your fans are fat fucks who'll never be slender?

You'll soon Swallow The Bones, when I deep-fry your ass til it's tender!

Colonel Sanders:
We'll talk when you find an origin about your dish, you're full of flaws,

Do you need sides with that? cause my burn made you beggin' for a coleslaw!

General Tso:
your rhymes are just boneless, my flows are like gravy, you're hopeless,

I'll expose the true nature of your dish that's even rejected by the homeless!

Colonel Sanders:
Make it a takeout order, because I'm taking you out of this competition!

Wasn't it clear from the start? KFC is the true Chicken's Definition!

Poll
Who at least did somewhat of a decent job? General Tso Colonel Sanders