User blog:GravityMan/Literature vs History Season 1 News with Jay Gatsby

You're wandering through the party, caught up in the harmony of drunken laughter and jazz. You take a drink from a nearby servant and relax by the pool, watching a few naked Legions swimming underneath, the water tinged blue and green from the fireworks above. You were invited to the party by the host himself, the mysterious millionaire of Long Island Mr. Gatsby. In the invitation, beautiful caligraphy declared that Mr. Gatsby wanted to advertise to you (a notable member of the esteemed ERB Wiki) yet another rip off of WonderPikachu12's series, a new series from the creative minds of GravityMan and ThyNotShallRap. But after hours of mindlessly walking about his enormous property, you have yet to encounter the elusive man.

Out of the corner of your eye you see CaveJohnson333 take off his shirt and you quickly turn to catch a glimpse of his beautifully scuplted mounds. But out of nowhere, you crash into a man with well carved features, spilling your drink down his once spotless blazer. You fumble an apology but he flashes you a reassuring smile, taking out a silk hankerchief with the intials JG sewn on every corner to clean up the mess.



"Mr. Superior?" he queries. You nod. "Excellent!" He leads you into a quiet study and closes the door, motioning for you to sit as he settles in on a comfy sofa, his posture perfect.

In the corner masturbating the Flatwoods Monster asks "What am I doing here" and exits the room.

"Great to meet you old sport! I've heard a lot about you. I'm a simple ol' chap, educated in the finest of arts and sciences and I'm here to inform you of a new series, Literature vs History!"

Drakan95 walks in. "Did someone say-"

"Nope! Unless I said knock off of a yellow fellow's series you can knock off!"

"Sowwy," Drakan weeps and commits suicide.

"Anyway," Gatsby continues, closing the door. "I of course will be in it, but so will a myriad of colorful historical figures battling literature giants. This is a GraviThy project, aka GravityMan does everything," Gatsby said rapidly, pausing to take a sip from his glass. He flashes a nervous grin at his attempt at a joke. "I kid."

He pulls a small card out of his pocket and glances at it. "The first battle will be released sometime in the next three weeks, depending on when Wonder delivers one of his finely constructed logos to the duo. Would you like some hints for some of the others?"

"No."

"Well one of them will be a shocker but not really, another will surely be "in", and I'm sure you can give a call to one of the rappers if you're unsure of what their battle could be." He crumples the card. "There will be nine battles in the first half, probably fifteen battles overall. No real set schedule, probably one/two battles a month. Leave suggestions for what you want to see in the comments, GraviThy has yet to really select any battles still and needs to steal your ideas."

"What."

"GOODBYE!"