User blog:Amontgomery1432/Amont's Rap Battle Reviews: Slender Man vs Jeff the Killer by Epic Rap Battle Parodies

Yo yo, here's another show I'm starting that I will probably then never follow up with anything lol. I've decided to break even further into the review bandwagon by talking about a rap battle! I did movies before, I did a meme song before, now I'm gonna be doing something different that people will probably not like. And boy have I picked a doozy to start out with. It's Slender Man vs Jeff the Killer by Epic Rap Battle Parodies. And, yes, I know that B-Lo already reviewed this for his Rap Ranter series, but he no longer does that show. So bite the flap of skin in between my balls and my anus.

In the fanmade rap battle community, the two big names are Video Game Rap Battles and Epic Rap Battle Parodies, and I'll be focusing on the latter for this review. ERBParodies first started back in 2012, and has sadly been shut down as of now because of deadboi being a speccy cunt. We won't be talking about him just yet, though. Thankfully, though, a channel named "Clemi's Heckpost" reuploaded a lot of them. So, thanks Clemi. You're doing God's work, my dude lol. Throughout the years ERBParodies existed, they officially released a grand total of 57 battles, with a few more having been scrapped for one reason or another. Again, probably due to Zander being an ass. One of the biggest battles they made is one between Slender Man and Jeff the Killer, because CreepyPastas were popular in 2013 and presumably for no other reason. This battle also started a new trend in fanmade rap battles: CreepyPasta royales, including Epic Rap Battles of Cartoons doing Dead Bart vs Squidward's Suicide, Gaming All-Star Rap Battles doing Sonic.exe vs Tails Doll, ERBP going back to the formula and doing Eyeless Jack vs Laughing Jack, and even myself writing a few back when I was a cringy piece of shit that desperately wanted to break into the rap battle community. I wrote one years ago between 1999 and Where the Bad Kids Go, that also featured Robert the Doll, the Ticket Taker, the Expressionless, and fucking Cthulhu among others. If I can find it, I'll post it here lol. Could be fun to laugh at.

Consider this a tribute of sorts to both ERBP and Rap Ranter, as both of them have brought me a lot of joy over the years. And, if anyone involved with making this battle ends up reading this: I'm really sorry about the screenshots over there lol. It was hard to find frames when the characters weren't bouncing around, so I eventually just said "fuck it" and took caps of random shit. I don't mean to portray you in an unproffional way in these images, I just think most of them are funny. I don't know many of these reviews I'm gonna do, it all will depend on how you all take this one. If you have any requests, I'd be happy to give my thoughts on them in the comments. Yee. I've rambled enough, let's just do this. My review/joke lines are written in italics, and the lines in the battle are written in bold. Ye

kill me


[Hoody's lines in grey, Masky's lines in silver ]

Announcer:
Epic Rap Battle Parodieeeeees

(This voice isn't inherently creepy, but at least it isn't what it usually sounds like. Also, dat beat doeeee)

Slender Man

(Not a bad costume, it just doesn't look finished, know what I mean? Still, though, not bad. Solid 5)

vs. Jeff the Killer

(Aaaand here we see that RLYoshi has come back to this role. I appreciate that he actually put the costume back on for this role as opposed to just sending in greenscreen cuts from the Jack the Ripper one, but something about how it looks here seems a tad off. In the first one, Jeff genuinely looked intimidating. He just looks pissed off in this frame. He's like, "Aw, this shit again?")

Begin

(Okay, that voice filter is getting kind of annoying now. I'd much rather listen to the normal ERBP announcer than this shit)

Slender Man:
Prepare for the Arrival of the faceless king of horror (Haha, "Arrival". I see what you did there. Also, that voice doesn't really fit this character. Justin gave him a better voice in the Enderman battle, in my opinion. It's deeper, has more bass, it's easier on the ears. Hell, I'll take his original Jack the Ripper voice over this high pitched shit)

I'll knock you harder than when you fell on the bathroom floor!

(I dunno, man, that isn't a very threatening threat. You ever fallen onto a bathroom floor before? Them fuckers will break your nose. If you can hit me harder than that, you will have my respect)

You're just a prepubescent child-

(Look who's talking! Have you heard your fuckin voice right now?)

-who has no meaning of fright

(What? Like, I get what you're trying to say. You're trying to do the "telling a horror-related thing that he/she isn't scary" cliche. That was just the weirdest way I've ever heard it be said)

I scare all who happen to spot me in the night

(Yeah, cause, objectively speaking, I would be pretty freaked out if I saw a nine-foot-tall wacky, inflatable-armed tube man in my bathroom while I'm trying to piss in the middle of the night. This line adds nothing to this battle except making it longer. Also, rip blackface Tupac. Surpisingly, not the only usage of blackface in this battle)

Nothing can match my length, I spit diminishing and dark

(Your "length"? In terms of what? Your legacy? Your height? Your pe-)

I got swarms of arms coming at you, prepared to leave a mark

(Great acting, Darkstink. I'm sure all of the viewers are taking you seriously. Also, I like the flow of this line a lot, even if the actual lyrics aren't the best)

'''Emo hair and white hoodie? No class to be found!'''

(He shops at Hot Topic, what do you expect?)

Were your talents scarred as well, because your rhymes are profound!

(You went first in this battle, and you weren't there when he battled Jack the Ripper, so you don't know how good or bad he is at rapping is yet. Just wait, like, two more seconds and then you'll find out. Also, his rhymes are fucking what now? "Profound?" I'm gonna assume the writer found that on Rhymezone and said "That'll do")

Jeff the Killer:
You're a pedophile chasing little kids through town

(Holy fuck, what a start lmao. And he's even fucking the air with his knife cock. I love it. Also, FUCK is Max's camera not good)

Legend says you kill, but I'm the best killer around

(Were you on the news? I don't think so, Jeffy boi)

What's with those tentacles?

(So he can look scarier from a distance)

Heh, you're like a living hentai!

(That works, too, I guess)

A photobomb who's only popularity comes from PewDiePie!

(I like the idea of calling Slender Man a photobomb, that's a nice jab, although I'd argue Slendymang was famous before Pewds played that game all those years ago)

You're known from a fake document, just look at Marble Hornets

(I thought you said his only popularity comes from PewDiePie. Make up your mind, you fuck)

Driving people crazy, no wonder you've never had a duet

(Slender Man needs to join Tik Tok, then. Also, "hornets" and "duet" does not rhyme. Also also, is Zander jacking off in the corner there? Well, I guess we know what he was doing while he wasn't working on ERBParodies. Also also also, this frame of Slender Man standing perfectly still watching Jeff talk to him is probably the best shot of him in the whole battle. He isn't flailing his arms around like he just learned how to use them,

You may be called a man, but I'm more killer than you

(You already made the killer joke, you twit. Also, the second part of that line doesn't add to the first in any way. GG)

As for your face: I'll bleach it, ignite it, give it a redo!

(He doesn't have a face, though. You'd just be burning his skull, Jeff. You're a dick. Also, I love that they got a fucking Firebender to cameo in this battle. I hope he was paid well)

Slender Man:
They call me Slender Man because I get all them bitches

(Really? I thought it was because you're slender and you're a man. Hmm. Victor Surge did a poor job of naming you, in that case. Good job on those tentacles, by the way. They almost look real)

'''See, I'm a man. You're a kid who can't write any disses'''

(Filler, filler, filler. I see filler everywhere. Filler, filler filler, yeah they do not even care)

You're a rip-off of Dahmer, and he's more effective

("Something is a rip-off of something else" cliche)

Your ass got burned, bitch!

(I mean, yeah. He did. Are you gonna make a joke about it orrr)

You're literally defective!

(Okay, SlendyIsHere)

'''How the hell are you considered scary? Your balls haven't dropped!'''

(I could easily say the same against you, given the way your voice is sounding)

And the most action you've ever had was at a bus stop!

(Not gonna lie, I kinda like this line. Simple, but effective. It gets a pass. Also, Jack the RIP-er)

I don't need to try against you.

(Ohhh, you're not trying? Is that why you used the word "profound" as an insult earlier? You're not a complete dumbass, you're just lazy? Alright, then)

You wouldn't last in my maze!

(I mean, you're not wrong. After you collect all the pages, you still die. Kind of a waste of time, if you ask me)

You must be getting claustrophobic, now taste my static haze!

(Jeff the Goddamn Killer is afraid of Santa Claus, are you fuckin serious? Also, how exactly does one taste static? Unless you plan on shoving an entire TV down his throat, I think your plan might be a little poorly thought out)

Jeff the Killer:
'''I can see right through you. You're not scary at all!'''

(Compared to you, he is)

You may be slender, but I'm the one who's standing tall

(This line is good in theory, but it really wasn't done that well. I can tell that Mat4yo did not chisel this)

I'll choke you with your black tie, no lie

Then beat your faceless ass until you finally die!

(You have a knife, though. Just use that. It's easier)

Ahahahaha

(Rap Battle 101: When you don't want to fill line space by making the line a little longer, just have your character laugh for no good reason)

You won't put up a fight, I'll make you need Hospice

(Remember, arspiring rap battle makers: If you wanna be able to afford that Mansion over on 7th Street, then you gotta cram as many references into your Slender Man battles as you possibly can. It's Elementary that you do this. Lock that shit up in a Prison, just try not to develop Claustrophobia from it. God, these namedrops are so goofy that I feel like I'm at a Carnival. Sanatorium)

Come at me and I'll rip right off your slender dick!

(I'm pretty sure FanMadeStuff just came in their pants after hearing that)

Don't give me your crap, bitch.

(What, you couldn't say "shit"? Are your parents in the other room, or something?)

You're done, you're old news!

(Basically a fact in simple terms)

How sad, they made a Telletubby scarier than you!

(They already were, the fuck are you talking about?)

Hoody and Masky:
Now hold on a second...

(WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!?)

It's Hoody and Masky-

(Oh. Fair enough lol)

-we bring horror you won't believe

(You bring racism I won't believe, good Christ)

Ain't no cameras here, so that means you better leave!

(What the hell is filming you right now, then, huh?)

We'll rip up your pages, then leave you in flames

(Well thank God for the subtitles. Seriously, Nathan, the hell is up with that voice? The blackface was one thing, this just completely derails my interest in this character. Also, don't you two work for Slender Man? Why aren't you rapping with him instead of against him?)

You both have no families, now it's your turn to get maimed

(You two guys are about to get MAAAAAIIIIIIIII-)

You've got long arms, and you've got no eyelids

(Ooh, someone knows how to Google search)

And both of you freaks always go after kids

(You do, too, though. You work for one of them, remember?)

What a lame excuse: No eyes, you can still see

That we'll kill you, just like your whole family!

(What a lame excuse for a final stanza, good God)

Eyeless Jack:
HA HA HA HA

(The fuck?)

It's Eyeless Jack, here!

(Is that his fuckin catchphrase, cause every single battle that I've seen that involves him has used that line to start his verse. I never read his story, so is that just a thing he says before he kills people? He pops up in people's rooms and goes "iT's EyElEsS jAcK hErE" before disemboweling them? Cause I wanna see that, actually)

So get ready for your doom

(Can you leave?)

Rip out your liver, you won't be needing this in your grave

(Well, yeah. But you gotta actually kill them first, fool)

Walking around the woods at night, you think you're so brave

(One of them lives in the forest, and I'll assume Hoody and Masky are frequent visitors by affiliation, and Jeff is a kid that probably is already roaming the woods in the first place. What's your excuse?)

Slender Man, you don't scare me

(Fuckin hell, these lyrics are boring. The only thing keeping my interest here is Hunter and his goofy antics)

Jeff, you're just a bitch

(Rude)

I'll make Hoody and Masky my death slaves, like my buddy Mitch

(Who the fuck is Mitch and how is he relevant here? Also, doth mine ears decieveth me or did Jack say "Like YOUR buddy Mitch" instead of "like MY"? This is why multiple takes are done)

I'm the CreepyPasta king, you'll feel a loss to the boss

(I'd agrue, if anyone, that crown should go to Slender Man)

I don't need eyes to see that you lost (hahaha)

(WITH PLOTS SO THIN, EVEN I CAN SEE THROUGH! Also, holy fuck that makeup is great! First time I saw it, it genuinely freaked me out. I don't know who's idea it was to color in Hunter's eyelids, but good on ya. That was a nice touch)

Smile Dog:
Spread the word, you bitches lost to this number one dog

(LMFAO WHAT IS THAT!? HOLY SHIT LMAOOO! Oh, my God, that is the fucking worst costume I've ever seen)

You pussies are only scary because you hide in the fog

(And, what, you're the pinnacle of horror? Yes, of course, how could I have been so ignorant?)

Meanwhile, I'll restyle you hostile pedophiles to jump miles

(Decent rhyme scheme, but I can't fuckin take you seriously cause of your beautifull horrendous costume!)

Get ready, cause you assholes are gonna see one hell of a smile

(Oh, I can't wait to see this)

I can't understand how you pussies are considered horror!

(FUCK ME, YOU MADE IT EVEN GOOFIER SOMEHOW LMFAO!! Also, your lyrics in particular are really bland. Every line so far hasn't had any references to you at all, just basic filler cheap shots. "You bitches", "you pussies", "you assholes". You even used "pussies" twice, for God's sake! I was about to ask you if you could try trying, but then I remembered what you look like. You're probably past the point of caring)

A twig, a child, pathetic twins, and a sightless explorer?

(I get the first three, those are okay, but you got "sightless explorer" for Jack? Is Eyeless Jack gonna be in the Dora movie, and none of us know it yet?)

You can't beat me, I'm more badass than all of you combined

(Of course you are lmao)

All five of you could never handle this demonic canine!

(I can't handle how much Zander clearly didn't care about this role. God, that was fucking profound)

SCP Intercom Voice Person Thingy:
*the door thing falls down, then rises back up*

(Huh? Oh, is this the fuckin SCP Foundation? Aw, come on, don't do this! The SCPs aren't even CreepyPastas, from what I've gathered. That's like using MissingNo in one of these battles, or some shit. And why is Macklemore orange? Turn this shit off!)

SCP-173 has escaped, we're putting the foundation on lockdown.

(Rip Macklemore)


 * longest build-up ever*

(Can you please stop showing Hoody? He's making me very uncomfortable)

SCP-173:
You D-class losers, wipe away that smile

(Kyenza's voice here is awesome, but I'm not really feeling the costume. Don't get me wrong, it's not Smile Dog levels of awful, but it could be better)

I'm SCP-173, animate and hostile

(Obligatory reference is obligatory. Also rip Eyedea)

I'm a Class Keter threat, you're all Euclid at best)

(You're a Euclid, too, though. Oops)

Special Victory Procedures: Beating all of you to death

(You could've very easily used the neck snap line here, and made it rhyme better. Also rip Eminem)

No use Containing or Protecting your in-Securities

(I see what you did there, and it was good. I guess)

Blink once and your dead, I'm like an angel that weeps

(Haha, Doctor How did you come up with that one? Also, why are you moving around so much? Isn't your shtick that you only move with the player isn't looking at you? Is this just what he does when your back is turned to him, cause's actually a pretty funny visual ngl. Also, that weird eye wall visual always creeped me out for whatever reason. I don't know why lol. Also also rip Mac Miller. For real this time lol)

'''Neck snap, get back. I'm having too much fun'''

(That makes one of us)

As soon as I'm in the arena, you'll all be [DATA EXPUNGED]

(That's not how expunging works, but okay lol. Had to work that joke in here somewhere)

Ben Drowned:
You shouldn't have done that.

(Hello, Ben. Obvious line is obvious. Also, why does Ben get to be a PNG, yet we get peperoni 173 and Smile the Cowardly Dog in live-action? What makes the statue so special?)

Time to give you a frown.

(Jesus Christ, the editing is at it's worst in this verse. That's what's giving me a frown)

I'm back for good, bitches, and, this time, I won't drown

(Were you in an ERBP before this, not counting being referenced in The Merchant vs The Happy Mask Salesman? Cause I would know. I used to fucking stan this shitty series. Also hi STOC. Why are you here?)

I go by the name of Ben, I'm everyone's thriller

(That makes no sense whatsogoddamnever. Also, I wonder what you're gonna rhyme that with)

I've come to this battle to destroy you pathetic excuses for killers

(There it is. Very creative)

You all will suffer, and I'll make sure the media will see

(Oh, they did. Almost four million people saw this before it got taken down. You're a little late here. Also, Jesus fuck. What a shot that is lmao. Ben looks pissed off from this angle)

I'll record your deaths and then upload it as a .wmv

(It'll still look better than Jeff's camera quality)

Half of you are just pussies who can't handle a face revealing

("Half" of them are pussies? Which half? I'll assume, judging by the "face revealing" part, that you're referring to Masky, Eyeless Jack, and Slender Man. That's 3/7, not including you, which is still not half. That line would've only worked if you had rapped before SCP-173, but you different. You fucked it up, Darkstink. You fool)

Now let me conclude this battle-

(God, I wish)

-with the Song of Unhealing!

(Aaand Donnie DarkLink clearly doesn't say the "un" in that word. Oops. Also, props for using the actual Song of Unhealing as the beat for this line. Gotta say, that's pretty cool)

MissingNo:
*the Game Boy Color appears*

(Ooh, a Pokepasta is next. I wonder who it'll be. Creepy Black? Lost Silver? Strangled Red? Personally, I'm hoping for B-)

Back from the island, it's MissingNo here to fight!

(Are you fuckin serious? Are you actually shitting me out of your nostril right now? MissingNo isn't a CreepyPasta, he's a glitched character in one of the early Pokemon games. I don't know which one, I've never played any of the games aside from Go for, like, a day. Also, if you thought Ben's editing was bad: Well, it was. And this isn't as bad as that, but it's still not pleasent to watch)

I'm the bitchin', glitchin' witch who will show you true fright

(I, too, am terrified of Tetris)

I'll crush you, prisoner, 128 times

(His number is 173, though, so that was a wasted line. Implying you are referring to SCP here lol)

And, Smile, I'll crush your flippy disk with my glitching rhymes!

(The filter on Max's voice really isn't doing him any favors here. It sounds like he said something else there. You know what I mean. Floppy di-)

'''Hoody, Masky, and Slendy? I can't make your stories worse'''

(I can)

'''And, Jack and Jeff? Ha! Sounds like a Mother Goose verse!'''

(Oh, wow! An actual good line. Never thought I'd see the day)

You all need to watch out-

(What, Ben doesn't get a shoutout? You racist bastard)

-for, when M truly arrives,

You'll be destroyed like a Marowak as I corrupt your lives!

(Wait, aren't you M? Is M that hooded dude dancing in your stomach? Who is M in this scenerio? Also, good job adding onto MissingNo's horror lore, since, again, he isn't a CreepyPasta. I love a good reboot)

Tetris Face Jumpscare:
*happens*

(Okay lol. Are you the last rapper?)

Zalgo:
*appears*

(Oh. Okay, I guess the last rapper is emo Cam)

RAH HA HA HA HAAA

(What is it with you guys and laughing? It isn't scary, it's just annoying)

Enough with your petty rhymes, it's time for you all to suffer

(Cam, is this your Zalgo voice or your Sub-Zero voice? You can't use the same voice for both characters and expect nitpickty assholes like me to not care. Also, ye, Zalgo is the best choice for a finisher here. And I dig the comic book pannels for this bit a lot)

'''My presence is so purely evil, the thought of my rhymes MAKE YOU SHUDDER! '''

(And, given how rich the Zalgo lore is, all the powers he possesses, and how much of al all-around genuinely frightening figure he is, I can only assume that this will be the best verse in the whole battle)

You're hiding in your forest so no one sees you cry

(Oh, you're gonna go down the "Dissing everyone that went before you one by one" route, aren't you? Lame. Also rip Harry Potter)

'''You, I'll spit bleach at and BURN YOUR INSIDES! '''

(Did you just say "split beach"? Good job, Cam. No second take was necessary, you nailed it on your first try. Also rip Steve)

'''Hoody and Masky? You two are just assholes'''

(What the fuck is this writing? This doesn't feel like an epic, dramatic finisher. This feels like Satan crawled up from Hell and got into a slap fight with Ashley from down the street)

'''Dressing up like little f*ggots as I STEAL YOUR SOULS! '''

(Jesus, dude, do you want me to get banned? Fuck, I hope censoring it is enough to let me stay on the Wiki. Also, I love Hoody's reaction here. Satan himself called him an asshole and said he was gonna steal his soul, and he reacts like someone cut in front of him at Stevie B's. Beautiful)

And, Jacky Boy, I think it's time you see

(Yeah, Jack. You're late for your appointment with the eye doctor. You need new frames for your glasses)

That nobody gives a shit about your crappy story

(To be fair, most CreepyPastas are complete garbage. I haven't read a single one that has scared me in any way. Well, except for you. Thank God you're doing a good job of portraying it)

'''Smile Dog? You're a puuppy, I'm the MAD DOG OF MADDNESS! '''

(Can you quit screaming? You're gonna wake the neighbors)

'''You bring suicidal thoughts, but I'll BRING YOU TO SADDNESS! '''

(I'm not getting much from this verse, gotta be honest. Like, the beat is fire and his flow isn't bad. It's just the lyrics. They suck)

'''And, SCP? Nobody knows what you are'''

(Yeah, we do. He's a class Keter threat, he's like an angel that weeps. Didn't you hear his verse?)

Some experiment covered in feces and scars?

(You just answered your own question, dipshit. Also, sick backflip. Why did he do that lol)

'''Ben? YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE DONE THAT, I'LL DISS YOU TO DEATH! '''

(Yes, you're very threatening)

You're a statue of Link who won't take another breath

(Statues don't breathe, unless you're rapping against the cast of Night at the Museum...  shit now I wanna make that a thing  )

 HELL NO, MISSINGNO, YOU'RE JUST A LITTLE BITCH 

(Okay, the red text in the subtitles was cool at first. Now you're pushing it. Nice filler, by the way. These are characters with textbooks worth of material each, how is there this much filler?)

Call yourself a master of corruption, but you're nothing but a glitch

(You just invalidated his role in this battle, you dumbass)

Nine lives taken at my demonic laughter

(And, somehow, that movie was better)

'''You're in my realm, bow down to ZALGO: YOUR MASTER! '''

(You finally reference yourself, and it's your last line. GG)

Announcer 2: Electric Boogaloo
Who Won?

(I did)

Who's next?

(I am)

You decide!

(Fuck, that's a lot of suggestions. I hope you're happy, Rynstkang, cause you got what you wanted)

EEEEEEEEEEEE-

(Oh, shit, yeah. I forgot that CreepyPasta battles had to end with something spooky happening for a little bit. Well, given how this was the first one, I wonder what the stinger is)

*previous rappers start Slendermanning the screen*

(Oh lol)

*the logo turns red, and then the video ends*

(Well, that was underwhelming)

Conclusion:
Slender Man vs Jeff the Killer is one of the most important rap battles ever made, for a multitude of reasons. It ushered in a new era of fanmade battles, for better or for worse. ERB started the royale format, and ERBP took that formula and said, "You got five rappers? Fuck you, here's seven. Fuck you again, here's ten. Fuck you a third time, here's thirty!" It started the trends of CreepyPasta royales, and long royales. It can be argued that they went a bit too far with those trends at times, but there's no denying the impact this battle left on the community. That being said, though, this battle isn't the best.

As far as costumes go: When you take into consideration the lack of a proper budget that most of these fanmade serieses had, they aren't that bad. Masky looked okay, Jeff's was good (even if it did look better the first time Max used it), Eyeless Jack's face paint was a nice touch, and Zalgo's outfit was decent (given that Zalgo doesn't exactly have a physical form). But the rest of them sucked. Slender Man wasn't bad perse, but he didn't look finished, I don't know what the fuck Smile Dog was wearing, MissingNo would've been better if Justin wasn't there at all, SCP got the face spots right and that's it, and I'll never unsee blackface Nathan. Ben is a PNG, so he doesn't count. The editing was all over the place, especially for Ben's verse SCP, Ben, and MissingNo wouldn't sit still for longer than two seconds, which was very distracting, and the visual edits during Ben's part were fucking nausea-inducing. I don't understand using archive footage of previous rappers as cameos in your battles, unless it's justified and makes sense. I'm fine with Steve Smith popping up in Seth MacFarlane vs Matt Groening because Matt namedropped him, I'm fine with a bunch of past ERB characters appearing in Bill and Ted's verses because they interacted with a lot of them, I'm fine with the Russian royale cast being in Ivan the Terrible's verse because his line gave them a reason to cameo. I do not understand how it was included in this battle, however. As genuinely cool as it looked when Slender Man grabbed Tupac's face, most of the cameos aren't done well at all. They don't react to being killed, they don't interact with anyone. They just stand there, maybe they'll dance, and then they get ripped in half. I love it. Granted, this isn't Walmart vs Target levels of baffling, but it was still pretty badly done.

Lyrically, this battle is a mixed bag. A mixed bag that is 90% filled with shit, but still a mixed bag nonetheless. Some of these lines are very good, with a prime example being MissingNo's Mother Goose joke. That was funny. Jeff had a few good jabs here and there, Slendy had one line that I liked, Smile Dog had a cool rhyme scheme, but, unfortunately, all the actual competent lyrics get bogged down by the excessive filler and basic insults. I'll say it again: These are characters with a lot of material, there did not need to be this many blatant filler lines. Too many uses of the "scary thing isn't scary lol" trope, excessive swearing taking up space where actual relevant disses could have gone, an egregious overuse of a rapper taking a whole stanza to diss out one person. "Ben, you're this. Jeff, you're that. SCP, you're this.", especially in Zalgo's verse. That's fine sometimes, but it starts to get a little annoying when you fill up your whole verse with it. That's why royales with 10+ rappers don't really work most of the time, in my opinion. Uber Rap Battles of Fiction made the format work with Kefka vs Giygas 2 by having everybody's verse be entirely about the person that rapped before them. This battle doesn't do that, and the writing really suffers for it. Off topic, but I've been considering doing one of those long-ass royales for years now. Mine would involve characters from musicals. Comment below if you think I should still do it. Anyway, this battle is a bunch of ass in the lyrical department, but I will say that the performances from the rappers aren't that bad for the most part. They're alright by me.

RL Yoshi brought a lot to the table when he played Jeff. Good voice, good energy, decent flows. Justin's voice in this battle was questionable, but there's no denying he had great energy. The same goes double for Hunter's Eyeless Jack, good Lord. He killed it. Great flow, good energy, only minimal hiccups here and there. He did good. Zander sucked ass as Smile Dog in both costume and audio, Kyenza delivered the best vocal performance of the whole battle, which is then followed up by DarkLink giving the worst vocal performance. Max made a decent MissingNo, and Cam's energy was great as Zalgo. Overall, vocally, most of them did good. The backgrounds were okay, putting aside the sky rotating behind Jeff. I think that's something the book of Revelations lists as a sign that the end is hear, but I'm not too sure. I also could've done without the obvious Google search backgrounds that Slender Man, the announcer, Smile Dog, SCP-173, and Eyeless Jack had. They aren't bad images, it just felt lazy. Hoody and Masky had the best looking background because it was actual live-action footage. That's a nice touch. The beats are nice, too. My favorite was Zalgo's. Yee. Overall, this battle was decent. There's things to like about it and there's things to dislike about it. It's a 4.5/10 from me.

Fuck, this was a long blog. I have the next battle to review planned out, but what series do you want me to tackle in the third one? If I get to it lmao

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New AERB coming soon, new ERBoWSaFoUFNtMAHW coming soon, debut album dropping on Saturday (God willing) and my Dad beats me. Get hyped, ya fucks