User blog:JKGame/Emmet vs Rainbow Dash - Rap Battle Tourney: Heroes Edition Round 1

So we back in this tourney with another Round 1 battle!

Today's match features The Special himself from the acclaimed movie...The Lego Movie, Emmet, and the speedy pegasus from Cloudsdale, Rainbow Dash. What's the connection? I dunno. They were like the last two left after having three matchups in this tourney that I liked so I just put them up together. Maybe two characters from media based on toys that nobody expected to be as good as it is? Or Everything is Awesome vs one who likes to say "awesome" a lot? Anyway, let's get this battle started without further ado.

Emmet:
Good morning! Looks like dissing you's on my list of things to do!

I thought Everything was Awesome until I came across you!

Your movie can't compare to the Piece of Resistance that is mine!

You just can't put two and two together and realize your show's past your prime!

You're too self-centered to be a hero; sorry if I rained on your parade

Almost left Cloudsdale like Cloud Cuckoo Land just to keep your pet awake!

Compared to all your friends, you're completely lacking in Catchy Songs!

I'll drop this Sonic clone so quick, she won't know what went wrong!

Rainbow Dash:
Come on, do I really have to face this cookie-cutter construction worker?

Just your existence makes me yawn! Clutch Powers was 20% cooler!

Like an Oscar nomination, you sure won't be winning this!

So forgettable that your so-called friends forgot that you existed!

This Pratt's got a low taste in humor; that definitely is a fact!

The thing you laugh at the most is when someone loses his pants!

I've seen tougher yellow-bellies when I first met Fluttershy!

Honestly, Emmet? I hate you waaay more than I hate pies!

Emmet:
I wonder how the Second Part will go if your first verse already crashed!

You can't even cross the road without ending up in the trash!

I'm the Special! You're just the typical tough tomboy cliché!

Even Scootaloo will take my side after you're owned in this rap game!

Bringing up so-called friends? Rainbow, you've got a couple, too!

So I think it's best to keep your mouth shut like you ate some Krazy Glue!

You claim to fast, yet here you're barely coming in last, man!

Stick with the lesser Indiana Jones! I'll be here chilling with Batman!

Rainbow Dash:
Your raps were more disappointing than your sequel in the box office!

Unlike you, at least I helped prevent my home from becoming apocalyptic!

Representing loyalty, inspiring little fillies to be awesome like me!

All you helped inspire was the conception of the Emoji Movie!

Your President Business makes Sombra's reign look less corrupt!

And the prophecy you were part of? Ha, it was entirely made up!

Here's the lesson for today: this mare is somepony you shouldn't mess with!

Now, a penny for your thoughts, if you didn't lose your head like Vitruvius!

WHO WON?

WHO MOVES ON?

YOU DECIDE!!!

Bonus Content
I originally replaced Rainbow with Kirby before switching back. Here's Kirby's verse written by MC Fawful:

Kirby:
Homer Simpson’s crazy cousin wants to step to Dream Land’s Saviour?

I’ll Krazy Glue your mouth shut so I won’t hear your trash voice later!

You’re lazy! You can’t handle any of my Wyldstyle, that’s how you sell!

I’ve fought tons of eldritch horrors, you got stuck with Will Ferrell!

This 3 piece suit of cringe is more stupid than Gooey!

I’ve seen better Cloud Cuckoo Lands in Banjo-Kazooie!

If I sucked up this fool, I’d probably get Stupidity!

You’re considered a hero? You weren’t even recognized in your city!

I’ll break a Brickowski, wanna peace treaty? I’ll tear that Offer, Man!

‘Cause you’ll get beaten more than Triple Deluxe when you step into Dream Land!

(2nd verse potentially)

You’ve got 2 video games, but I’m soaring with mains and spinoffs, kid!

You best backoff! ‘Cause I’ll decapitate you like Lord Business!

C’mon! You suck! Yet you think you’ll win this?

You try to be a winner, but I’m the Piece of Resistance!