User blog:Gliscor Fan/Epic Rap Battles: Pokemon vs History Gen 3 Alolan Exeggutor vs Loch Ness Monster

I can't believe it took me this long to finish this. I had a fairly crazy writers block where I couldn't write jackshit but then I had a flash of inspiration after watching Caeser vs Zulu, so, here we are.

I did a strawpoll to see which battle I'd do for the premiere, and the result was this one. Alolan Exeggutor vs The Loch Ness Monster. Connection? They both have incredibly long necks. That's it. I hate myself for even thinking of this but here we are. I don't really have a next battle planned or a full season scheduled out yet, so no hints this time, but drop some suggestions maybe. who knows. Anyway, let's begin.

INTRO
EPIC RAP BATTLES

POKEMON VS HISTORY



VERSUS



BEGIN!

BATTLE
Alolan Exeggutor:

EXEGG! I’m dragon rushin’ in this rap to fight a creature of the sea

Originally known to be a little toy submarine, see?

Yes, we both have long necks, so there might be some confusion

But at least when people see me, they don’t think I’m an illusion!

I’m a tropical beast! Changed between regions

You just exist so cryptozoologists can study you, for reasons

You wanna see alola? Here, I’ll take ya on a tour

And show you a Lapras, a better Plesiosaur!

Loch Ness Monster:

With those Three heads, I thought you’d be smarter

Than to compare me to a toy submarine, for starters

I’m the most mythical creature to come out of Scotland

You evolved from some eggs that couldn’t make it out the carton

I mean, Come on! You can’t even learn dragon rush

You’re a super tall palm tree that must be collecting dust

And yet, you appear out of a ball that breaks a stage in half

So your fellow playable pokemon can’t even get past

You appear to be tough, but this isn’t a mission of Ultra Urgency

The reason you exist is mostly just absurdity!

Alolan Exeggutor:

I wouldn’t call it absurdity, just a new innovation

While Saint Columbia couldn’t draw your illustration

While some will take a sonar and try to hunt you down

Hoping to make millions of dollars but ending up with a frown!

Yet, I’m terrifying! I’m part Dragon!

And I’m attacking you with a fiery passion

So if you want to drop an egg bomb, try and be nice

Or I’ll Wood Hammer you so hard you’ll be stuck back in ice!

Loch Ness Monster:

Your grassy nature shows through the river of your flow

That you don’t have a clue where your disses will go!

You’re so high up, it must be hard to see

How much the earth and its people are fascinated with me

You’re stuck on an island where mostly tourist be

While I live in a loch for all eternity!

Now you can cast your last Stun Spore, but you better be quick, man

Cause once I win this battle, I’ll never be seen again

OUTRO
WHO WON?

WHO’S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

EPIC

~EXEGG!!!!

RAP BATTLES

POKEMON VS HISTORY!

POLL
Who Won? Alolan Exeggutor The Loch Ness Monster