User blog:RespectthePixel35/Epic RTP Battles of History 9-Jesus Christ vs Eminem

Well, here we go with a suggestion that used to be popular, then Macklemore came in. So, this ERtPBoH features critically acclaimed best rapper, Eminem, battling the central figure of Christianity, Jesus Christ, to see who is the BEST of the BEST.

Cast
Nice Peter as Jesus Christ

MC Mr. Napkins as Eminem

EpicLLOYD as Macklemore (cameo)

The Battle
Beat Marshall starts at 0:31

EPIC!!! RTP!!!! BATTLES!!!!! OF!!!!!! HISTORY!!!!!!!!

JESUS CHRIST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

VS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

EMINEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BEGIN!!!!!!!

Eminem:
You've Gone Crazy if you think you can beat me,

I'm the world's greatest rapper, just get back to your sheep.

This is your last stand, prepare to be baptized in lava,

You'll be Up In Smoke, can I get a holla?

I Just Don't Give A Fuck, Still Don't Give A Fuck,

That you rised from the dead, 'cause now you're out of luck.

It's just The Way I Am, so Don't Approach Me,

Now let's give you a Moment of Clarity,

I'll run 8 Miles around you, through these raps,

'Cause I'll battle you easily Till I Collapse.

It's a Farewell Discourse, of course I'll win.

You betrayed your own religion! What a sin!

I'll Never Forget Ya, My Buddy, but don't get jealous,

You think you can win, but you really Can't Touch This.

You really can't handle this epic diss,

After this rap, I'll become atheist.

Jesus Christ:
................ What did you say to me?

Could you please repeat that? I wasn't listening.

I am Jesus! I do whatever I can,

Now father, please forgive me for what I'm about do to this man.

You're my son. I'd expect you to behave a bit more.

But what can I expect? Your music is a bore.

Good Friday, I'll see you in a few years, soon.

But for now, I gotta handle other bad dudes like you.

I might not send you to hell if you start to behave,

But right now, you're Going Nowhere, so get out of my face.

Because I am the Son of the blessed! You're a son of a bitch!

I rose from the dead, but I'm not a witch.

Now listen up, son, you're trying too hard.

Your rapping is just way too Bizarre.

Because your rhymes aren't worth 50 Cents!

You want some tips? Here's some Blueprints.

=
TO BE FINISHED LATER==========