User blog:BennyCupster/Death Vs. Death (Moleman's Epic Rap Battles 28, Short Version)

Per the format of my other recent projects and their partial/preview versions, this is an unfinished version of what will in its full form be a much longer product, posted for promotional and release-activity purposes and for people who don't care/have the attention span for overly long battles.

MOLEMAN'S EPIC RAP BATTLES...

...DEATH...

...VS...

...DEATH!!!!!!!!!!

BEGIN!

Verse 1
• Death: •

Word of warning here: forget about the lofty Cost of Living,

'Cause the price of crossing me's a hundredfold if I'm forgiving!

Whether chilling in my realm or as a mortal each centennial,

The Endless biggest sis's gothic beauty is perennial!

A soul-collector nice as I? Good luck with ever finding one,

Yet here up on the mic, I've all the fury of the Kindly Ones,

When I attack a bony, hackneyed, homely phony reaper

As the one and only ultimate in mortal coil-keepers!

You'll end up like my poor middle brother: straight-vacate your station,

When I see you get a lifetime's worth of shame; humiliation

From the Vertigo my dizzying disses hit you with. You'll soon Despair!

I'll put the "psycho" into "psychopomp"; leave you in disrepair!

Contest against this Champion? You're hardly my competitor;

In terms of schticks-personified, you're more on par with Pedobear!

You oughta go and ask your old pal Marlo if she's heard of me;

Like Gadling finally croaking, my defeat will take Eternity!

Verse 2
• Death: •

Let Death arrest her customary silence for a spell

To drop omniscient lyrics deeper than the annals of my Well:

You're lost in deep Delirium; mad as a titan's hopeless courting.

I'm the empress of the end; you're as legit as Emperor Norton!

They say War Is Hell, but it hath not a fury close to mine;

I'll send you to Oblivion with Cosmic Power most divine!

Ensnare you like a Crowley wannabe with no mistake of target;

When you mess with Lady Death, she strikes with Adamantine hardness!

Watch mortality incarnate wreck an eldritch Marcia Brady;

Any Cancer of a wretch who steps to Death's Beyonder-Crazy!

Bring your siblings all along to aid in challenging my mantle,

For your Seven Ds are less a threat to me than Disney Channel's!

Inescapable as gravity, and twice as harsh a mistress;

Doesn't take your Dead Boy buddies to Detect which Death'll win this.

Go consult your older brother's book, and find it's quite confirmable:

Your effort's doomed as Captain Mar-Vell; diagnosis terminal!

Verse 3
• Death: •

That verse had all the logic of a rant on life's unfairness,

With a flow awkward as when they had me teaching AIDS awareness!

My demolishing this bag of bones will come as no surprise;

You're in the Dead Pool: even Wade is betting on your swift demise!

You're Dreaming if disputing Death is what your dreary rear's Desiring;

Ask any cosplay expert which of us is more inspiring.

Like metaphoric wings, all feel the beating of my voice,

For one must bend to me or face Annihilation; make your choice.

Verse 4
• Death: •

Giving ultimatums, are we, pasty punk? You're off your rocker;

Full of Rot, and tactless as that omnicidal sicko, Walker.

Still, it's high time for a change, so don't you think my aura fazed

As I once more resume my silence while my champion takes the stage...

• Thanos: •

I'm throwing down the Gauntlet: spitting Gems of Infinite dopeness;

Wooing the women of my worship with this intricate opus!

I'm resurrected once again and back to cause galactic harm,

And you can bet this time I won't end up retired on some farm!

I'll bathe the star-ways with the innards of this Deviant impostor

With Titanic rhyming, sharper than the blades up on my copter!

Take one look into my eyes; you'll panic like my matron parent did.

When Thanos gets to Rising, taking flight is quite Imperative!

With Cosmic Cube in hand, I'll A.I.M. to conquer space and time,

And when my fleet's on the attack, the only Sanctuary's mine.

I'm an Eternal-dreaded warlord, carrying out cross-cosmic slaughter,

And your title-claim's legit as Nebula being my granddaughter!

Poll
Who Won? Death of the Endless Mistress Death and Thanos