User blog:Wachowman/Parody 88 Cyan vs Gravity (Tolkien vs Martin)

Wach: Hello everyone and welcome back to ERB Season 5 Parodies! And when I say Welcome back I mean welcome to ERB Season 5 Parodies, tbh I realized Welcome back doesn't work cause I haven't parodied a Season 5 battle before, I'm literally saying what's off the top of my mind now, I should stop.

Wach: Anyways glad to finally be back to doing this, was a little rusty but nothing hard, especially with my good friend and fellow helper Trix-...wait...Trixter left...so who helped me with this battle?

???: I did.

(Gravity drops from the sky)

Wach: Gravity, you're my new Parody helper?

Gravity:...Wach, we already made the whole parody, you know this.

Wach:...true, well then, welcome aboard...this has nothing to do with you being in this specific parody right?

Gravity: Not at all! Gtg!

(Gravity flies away)

Wach: well then, I'd like to thank Gravity for helping me with a good portion of some lines! And hope you all enjoy!

Battle
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY

CYANWRITES

VS

GRAVITYMAN

BEGIN

Cyan
Off the shelf! Spitting flames harsher than-

Dante's Hell! With your hate and your brawls and your raps-

Stupid blogs, no existing sprites,

Let's remember in the end that Cyans always Write!

Dropping rhymes harder than my opponents on the Wiki,

Andy where's your lines?

Andrew
AHHHHH!

Cyan
I guess they're scared of me.

All your bragging stuff sucks, along with your blogs!

This is now Gravitys Fall, call it his Prologue.

Take a shot every time theres a sex joke in your series,

I can't believe it, I just lost three kidneys!

Your 'Vs History' raps are just so overdone,

I'm fourth place in the Tourney, you lost in Round 1!

Gravity
Thy, Cave, Hawkeye, Clock,

Aided their series to make Top Blogs!

And after I made Drak lave, you lost comments galore,

But instead of teaming up with me, you hoped in GIRs Drawer!

In comments, we're not even alike!

I got double your fans, maybe you should take my advice.

What I write's always right, Your shit's awful,

You're looking blue, a fail just like your novel!

We all know literature has been inspired by ones before,

Which is why your bores with stolen twists from the Goosebumps' lore

But Bad News, for your works it's ironic to claim copyright,

Because your only finished novel was a rip off of Twilight!

Cyan
Your mind is like an open book but not one I would read,

Why don't you go back to your twins Butch and Smoshery.

Call me Negan! I'm tougher than Lucille!

Poetry Slam your head, to all the Wikis appeal!

Gravity
You diss Negan then ask me to call you him,

You won newest user against a sodomitic fish!

In real life, you've done something I never could, sadly,

You're an overweight stranger who met Barry in an alley!

Cyan
My Award's better than your Wiki War

I spit quick cause I gotta GET ON DRAWER

I'll wear your Sock and then throw you in my closet,

So many questions UnAnswered and I'm just being honest, Grav.

Like making pages that count as spam,

You got a shotgun in your mouth, Munkee's ready to ban!

And don't forget to mention about your Yang pornos!

My raps so hot, like Dante's Inferno!

Gravity
Expected more by someone with your knowledge,

Then I remembered you...almost flunked college!

You are getting me sick cause just like Nail you are poisonous,

Let's have a Poem Concerning how you got beaten by Truth once.

And I help people here whenever I can,

Need proof Laim? Just ask Wachowman!

Your Dick Jokes can't beat me! Go back to driving!

You may have gone many miles, but I'm the one thriving!

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF *An arrow passes by the screen*

...HISTORY!

Who Won? Gravity Cyan