User blog:MamboFive/MamboFives Rap Battle: Indiana Jones VS James Bond

OooooohEhhhhhhhhpicrrrrrapbattlesofhistoryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy....

James Bond

Versus!

Indiana Joooooones

Begin!

J.B

On her majesty's secret service, I decree,

That this ophidiophobic archaeologist won't beat me!

Professor Jones might have found the Holy Grail,

Too bad his dad didn't have a 'Guardian Angel'

Don't even try to step into my temple of doom,

I'll smash your crystal skull with a cap from my pistol, boom!

My rhymes 'Skyfall' over your short round of raps, Dr. No-No!

007's raps are COLD, stick to your bullwhip, oh!

I'll shove my Goldfinger up your a**, you Octopussy

But I'll hand this rap to you, like I did with Messervy.

I.J Hello, Mr. Bond I've been expecting you,

I'm an adventurer, a hard man to kill, Agent Red Tatooo!

I'll give you a 'Blast From the Past', I'm like a hurricane! Gold.

This is the Casino Royale m*****f***er, you'd better fold!

I'll raid Teresa's Lost Ark and I'll Blofeld her head,

You're just a Thuggee little c*** who should be dead!

I'll John Hurt ya with my whip, make you go crazy!

I got a licence to kill this Icebreaker, Connery!

You should have stuck to smokin', Gold Gun Guy,

No deals, Bond it's just win, lose or die!

J.B

Why don't you go back to Marshall you little crap?

So I can teach you how write a better rap!

My flow will 'Thunderball' through your academy awards Jones

And I'll 'DoubleShot' through your flimsy skin and bones,

Christmas Jones is what I'll call you, Santa Broken-Clawed git!

It's a high time to kill, I'll sink you like the frigate.

I'll scare the living daylights outta you, better be afraid.

You only live twice Indy but this is your Last Crusade!

I.J

You think I'm phased? You work for the bulls*** service!

All the material in your 'rhymes' are so full of piss!

I'll Excalibur through your QBranch, you dependant little f**k.

Bet you wish you weren't put against me! Luck? What luck!

Shoot a bullet from my gun into your head, make you a goner.

You could never even live up to my Role of Honour!

I ain't joking around, you Golden-Eyed Brit!

You lost today, kid. But that doesn't mean you have to like it.

Who Won?

Who's Next?

You decide!

Epic! (Shotgun Shot)

(Ahh!) Rap Battles of Historyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!