User blog:Dawid slebioda/J.K.ROWLING VS RICK RIORDAN - RAP BATTLE

'''J.K.ROWLING VS RICK RIORDAN  J. K. ROWLING''' Hi, Rickie. It’s me, Jo – the greatest author of all time I’m so rich and magic, I could possess the Scottish duck’s first dime. I haven’t heard about you ‘till this very battle So I’m going to win easily with you, Texas cattle. Before rap is going to end, you will scream “This was long overdue. Please don’t hurt me”. My creations are loved by children all around the globe, Your fans hate your movies and Cormoran didn’t need do probe. So I’m the best. Learn, man, I’m as Orphean as Pokémon, Abra So take the Pipe before I say just one simple spell “Avada Kadabra”.

RICK RIORDAN You were Ridiculum, when you tried to kill me. Hay! I have visited the Tartarus to spend my Bes’ holidays, Then I returned in 3 days and now I keep loose, After the battle you won’t have any of 39 clues, What went wrong. That’s true. Ask Apollo. He isn’t a liar. I will certainly Seth this witch and her books afire before any trial. I’ve written book for my son, who Luke-ily couldn’t read the shit of my rival, You got your idea when you was waiting for Thomas Engine’s arrival. I’m hyper American God. You should exit like Britain, do it very quick Before I will be forced to shot you with my dick. My heroes “assemble”. They’re like Avengers. It would be Endgame if you met my worldwide travelling rangers. You’ve written about Gandalf-rip-offs, speecy, grind and ginger. So pause and put your verse into my Colossus dinger.

J. K. ROWLING Merlin’s Beard! I am one who must not be named with epithets which are bad or mean, Even if it was the Speaker Corner. Please! I’m still the miraculous Rhyme Queen. So “Be prepared” better than your students, man, Look at Pottermore, I’ll show fantastic beats and where to find them. I’m the number one author-ist, philanthropist, Maybe no-Maj can’t see due to mist. I’m hero, you zero like Muses sang in “Hercules”, You joined HYDRA? Did you wanted to double your monies? Wait. Why I am wasting my breath? Ulysses grants: You are Nobody and no mistake You’re Loki of Literature, full of Serious death and fake. I don’t care about you, hitch and cock you want to suck. Maybe you are a gay, Rick, because of your myths. What the Fuck!

RICK RIORDAN Oh my Zeus! I jump in before hog shows her warty ass, Sit on the throne, we have things to discuss. I swear on the Styx this verse isn’t about cant, twit. But it’s good to list what Circe did wrong in the lit. One: Don’t call you “Queen”. You haven’t grown even into Sappho, I’m the Uncle Grandpa. Fandom can decide if my raps are canon. Two: Don’t talk about deaths. You are Joanne the Ripper of the present day. Maybe you should turn off the killing mode, J! Your main character is orphan, what Snape couldn’t prevent. I’d rather read happier book series, A Series of Unfortunate Event. Three: You love to time turn to make your characters gay-ish. Fans have eaten you out. Why do you do it? Is it your pent-up fetish? I’m loved when my characters belongs to all the groups. I have Muslims, disabled, colored, natives and LGBTQ+. I started with Nico and now my books are more colorful than Iris, Kneel, ere I do that Nazi Dark One mission Valkyries. Finally: You say you are the best, clown. But for you the rap like your fortune was gone down.