Stephen King vs Edgar Allan Poe



Stephen King vs Edgar Allan Poe is the 42nd installment of Epic Rap Battles of History and the ninth episode of Season 3. It features influential 19th century poet and horror author, Edgar Allan Poe, rapping against the King of Horror, Stephen King. It was released on June 2nd, 2014.

Cast
George Watsky as Edgar Allan Poe

Zach Sherwin as Stephen King

Edgar Allan Poe:
Once upon a midnight dreary, as I spit this weak and weary,

I will choke this joker with a trochee till his cheeks are teary! (Ahh!)

But y'all don't hear me, all should fear me!

I'll forever be better, you'll never be near me,

Your books are as eerie as Beverly Cleary!

You're a faux Bram Stoker, so scram, the show's over.

Your flow's so-so, Poe's poems pwn posers! (oh snap!)

I wrote them locked in a cave, while I sobbed in a rage.

The Tell-Tale Heart beats soft in its grave, while this jerk just beats off on a page!

Stephen King:
Oh, you want to talk shop, you gothed-out fop?

Go back to Hot Topic and shop for a top!

There's a melancholy alcoholic laughingstock!

In the King's house, now watch the Castle Rock!

Pouty little poet with an opiate affliction.

I'm a workaholic with a fiction addiction.

I'm making dedicated readers shivery and jittery.

Feel that Rage and Misery!

You better start Running Man, you're in deep poo, Poe!

I'm a mad dog, fangs Shining, Cujo!

Tommyknock you down till you can't Stand up.

You're as soft as Po, the Kung Fu Panda!

Racks on racks cause I pen fat stacks of frightening writing, have you seen the pile?

I can even take a break from my routine style;

Crank out a Shawshank or a Green Mile.

Masque of the Red Death? Barely blood curdling.

Pit and the Pendulum? Not even unnerving.

Perving on your first cousin when she's thirteen years old? Now that's disturbing!

Edgar Allan Poe:
Stephen, you pretend to do it, I've been really living through it,

Misery and poverty and family woes!

I see through you like pantyhose, doing Chappelle and Simpsons cameos! (ahh!)

Even if you're gripping on a weapon then you better get to stepping if you're messing with the horror lord!

In a minute maybe I'mma hit him, cut him into itty bitty bits and I'mma stick him in the floorboards!

Stephen King:
(Sigh) Speaking of bored, you're the worst!

Dropped out of school but you can't drop a verse.

I could have spent that time better.

In eight bars, I can write a whole best-seller!

I'm so prolific, this sickly goblin won't be bothering me, I'm on a clobbering spree.

And I'll be smacking you with any of the big thick books in my big dick bibliography!

See, I'm the author with the blood and gore lore galore that'll horrify a reader to the core!

Fame? Money? Talent? Success? You'll always have less, never more!

Trivia

 * This is the second battle after Doc Brown vs Doctor Who to feature George Watsky and Zach Sherwin rapping against each other.
 * Coincidentally, both battles are the 9th battle of the season.
 * This is the second battle to have two authors battling, after Dr. Seuss vs Shakespeare.
 * Coincidentally, both battles featured George Watsky, who portrayed poets both times.
 * This is the second battle where neither Peter nor Lloyd play/voice any character, excluding the Announcer, the first being Michael Jordan vs Muhammad Ali.
 * When The Announcer says "You Decide" MrMightymario's suggestion appears twice.
 * This is the first rap battle where a character's face fills the screen, masking the background.
 * This is the first battle where Zach Sherwin does not face Nice Peter.
 * Stephen King tweeted "Good news/bad news kind of thing: MR. MERCEDES comes out tomorrow, but I think Poe shut me down in the rap contest. :-("  This is the 2nd time someone that was portrayed in a rap battle mentioned it on Twitter, the first being Donald Trump.
 * He later tweeted his own lyrics for a battle versus Poe.  &
 * The first line of Poe's first verse was taken from the start of Poe's "The Raven" and then changed to fit the battle. (Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered weak and weary.)
 * King's last line is also taken from Poe's "The Raven", although used in a different context to fit the battle. (Nevermore!)
 * This is the second battle to have a sneak preview for it in a previous battle, after Goku vs Superman. The third is Sir Isaac Newton vs Bill Nye.
 * This battle is the first since Rasputin vs Stalin (a gap of ten battles) to use two static backgrounds instead of an actual location for either rapper.