Julia Child

"When it comes to haute cuisine, there's one F-word: France!"

- Julia Child

Julia Child battled Gordon Ramsay in Gordon Ramsay vs Julia Child. She was portrayed by Mamrie Hart.

Information on the rapper
Julia Carolyn Child was born on August 15th, 1912, in Pasadena, California. Rejected from the army because she was too tall, she started learning how to cook. She was a chef, author, and television host. She is most notable for introducing sophisticated French cuisine to the American public through her culinary television show, The French Chef, and her co-written cookbook, Mastering the Art of French Cooking. Child died at the age of 91 on August 13th, 2004, in Montecito, California.

Verse 1:
Ooh! Isn't that a wonderful thing?

A grumpy little chef who thinks he can bring

Enough salt to justify getting rough

With the butter-loving queen of the bourguignon boeuf!

I rock hard as concrete on top of these bomb beats!

Been choppin' the pommes frites since you sucked on your mom's teat!

I served America dutifully, and I sliced lard beautifully!

I reigned supreme from shark repellent to charcuterie!

Go on and cross your arms in that B-boy stance!

When it comes to haute cuisine, there's one F-word: France!

Here's a nice amuse-bouche, take a poor abused youth,

Set a thirty-year timer, voilà! Huge douche!

You're a namby-pamby candy-assed pansy, Gordon Ramsay!

You couldn't rap your way out of a pastry bag, understand me?

I laugh and create; you berate and destroy,

But fear, my dear boy, is less scrumptious than joy!

Verse 2:
Oh please, your defeat's guaranteed!

Concede, I've got this in the bag: sous-vide! (Ha!)

Michelin indeed, you've done well for yourself,

But as a person, you couldn't get a star on Yelp!

I could freeze a steak with those frosted tips!

What's with that bitter taste in every word from your lips?

You scream at women, while the fits that you're pitching

Make you the pissiest bitch in the kitchen!

I'll pat you on the head, melt you, and stick it to ya!

Anything's good with enough butter! Boo-yah!

Oh, I'm so glad you spent this time with me!

Now, eat a dick! Bon appétit!

Trivia

 * Child is the fifth PBS television show host to rap, after Mister Rogers, Bob Ross, Bill Nye, and Neil deGrasse Tyson.
 * She is the first PBS television show host to be a title rapper that is not portrayed by Nice Peter.
 * She is the first and only female PBS television show host to appear.
 * She has the most lines of any solo rapper in a single battle, at 28.