User blog:Hippie Rat/Mario vs Link. The Super Smash Brothers Rap Battle.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!! This is it, the Big Bad Super Smash Bros Rap Battle. My season 2 finale. 412 lines, 29 parties, and an impressive 97 rappers. Wow.

I would like to thank VGRB (with his Super Smash Brothers vs PlayStation All Stars), Smosh (with their Smash Rap), Starbomb (with SMASH!), The Infinite Source (with Super Smash Bros [The Rap Battle]), and later on in the writing process Mat4yo (with Smash God), and SploogeGaming & Co. (with the Ultimate Super Smash Bros Rap) as inspiration for writing this battle.

Stay tuned for season 3 of my Epic Rap Battles!

Order of Rappers
Mario

Link

Mario Universe (Mario, Dr. Mario, Luigi, Yoshi, Peach, Rosalina, Luma, Wario, Diddy Kong, Donkey Kong, Bowser Jr, Bowser)

Legend of Zelda Universe (Link, Young Link, Toon Link, Zelda, Sheik, Ganondorf)

Pokémon Universe (Pokémon Trainer, Charizard, Squirtle, Ivysaur, Jigglypuff, Lucario, Greninja, Pichu, Pikachu, Mewtwo)

Kirby Universe (Meta Knight, King Dedede, Kirby)

Star Fox Universe (Fox McCloud, Falco Lombardi, Wolf O'Donnell)

Final Fantasy Universe (Cloud Strife)

Fire Emblem Universe (Marth, Roy, Ike, Robin, Lucina, Corrin)

Xenoblade Universe (Shulk)

Kid Icarus Universe (Pit, Dark Pit, Palutena)

Bayonetta Universe (Bayonetta)

Ice Climbers Universe (Popo, Nana)

Duck Hunt Universe (Dog, Duck)

Pac-Man Universe (Pac-Man)

Game and Watch Universe (Mr. Game & Watch)

R.O.B. Universe (R.O.B.)

Mega Man Universe (Mega Man)

Metroid Universe (Samus Aran)

Metal Gear Universe (Snake)

F-Zero Universe (Captain Falcon)

Sonic the Hedgehog Universe (Sonic the Hedgehog)

Street Fighter Universe (Ryu)

Punch Out Universe (Little Mac)

Pikmin Universe (Olimar)

Animal Crossing Universe (Villager)

Earthbound Universe (Ness, Lucas)

Wii Fit Universe (Wii Fit Trainer)

Mii Fighters and Costumes (Mii Brawler, Mii Swordfighter, Mii Gunner, Inkling, Akira Yuki, Jacky Bryant, Heihachi Mishima, Lloyd Irving, Monster Hunter, Gilgamesh, Takamaru)

Assist Trophies (Nintendog, Barbara Bat, Dillon, Ray MK III, Dr. Wright, Jill, Takamaru, Kururin, Saki Amamiya, Dr. Kawashima, Sheriff, Starfy, Infantry and Tanks, Excitebike, Isaac, Devil, Sablé Prince, Pong)

Master Hand

Lyrics
Announcer:

Super Smash Bros! Mario vs Link! 3, 2, 1... GO!

Mario:

It's-a me, the OG, strolling into this battle like I do to the KK,

But this time I got five stock, Golden Plains, no items in the fray.

Hey! Super Mario's better Super M-A than Superman,

Going Jordan in my Galaxy, Space Jam, that's why they call me Jumpman.

Meanwhile, the Hero of Fill-In-The-Blank is trying to face me,

Well I'll crush him, make him dust like the Great Deku Tree.

You hear me, Robin Hood? Let's see what your Triforce can do,

Best protect your little master sword from a sex-kicking Italian dude.

Wahoo! Jumpman, Jumpman, Jumpman, Jumpman, this boy's up to something,

You're a circus freak, call you Donkey Kong and watch me whipping.

You hear me loud and clear with those ears straight outta North Pole,

Stage clear, motherfucker, hello from the top of the flagpole.

Link:

Hweh! Don't make me laugh, defeating this hero is hopeless,

Step to me, you won't even be Saved by the Bell, Mario Lopez.

Because let's be honest, if trying out the sex kick is your kink,

Bitch, you best finish with a Mario Finale if you wanna harm my giant sausage link.

Now I'm not gonna try to tri-force you to get better, just get lost, kid,

Because your appearance in the smash games is worse than Hoskins.

Go back to your Mario Karts and Mario Parties instead of trying to rhyme,

Let's be honest, Super Mario 64 doesn't compare to Ocarina of Time.

The name's Link, I'm the hero of all things Hyrule,

I been rocking hardcore faves since the days of Zelda 2!

Plumber, carpenter, doctor, ringleader, and Toadstool's honorary kiss-ass is,

Adding his defeat to his list of hundreds of copies of the same game with new graphics.

Mario:

You're spitting bullshit now, it's time you get running,

I know I didn't get a medical degree for nothing.

Dr. Mario:

Yo, Doc Mario's come here to flow, some poppin pills and a blaze to blow,

You think your rapping's sick, not anymo', I play Tetris like dominoes. Oh!

Luigi:

That's right, brother, it's time we show these bitches how to super smash, brother,

Step in my mansion, I'm a color-stealing motherfucker crusher.

Yoshi:

Yoshi! Yo, see, I'm the spitting, flying dinosaur with the island, no denying,

And if you're sufficient, a hundred lives n' I'm supplying.

Princess Peach:

Oh, the monarch of the Mushroom Kingdom packs quite a clout,

Remind me again who's this bitch Zelda everyone's been talking about.

Rosalina & (Luma):

I been exploring cross the universe, (spit tasty star bits),

(Spin attack in the midst), and a mama with the wits.

Wario:

Waha! It's the badass ass-rapping clone!

Stacking coins, bitch I'm rich, dark clone pullin blow.

Diddy Kong:

I'm coming for you, bitch, yo Diddy Kong is here,

With my pistols out, I'll leave you Kremling in fear.

Donkey Kong:

Yeah, it's DK! Donkey Kong!

I'm D. King of this bitch, banging on my chest and going apeshit.

Bowser Jr:

The flaming rocks my poppa pops out is ridiculous,

This whole Koopa Army gives a better gaming experience!

Bowser:

Hahahaha! You just can't step to us!

Got a ginger against a giga, yo I'm the final boss!

Mario:

I'm the player in the Sunshine, you're in Mario's Shadow,

Like the one you lost, Peter Pan. Let's-a go!

Young Link:

Since I been toddling I be electrifying like Song of Storms lightning,

Bash in your Skull, Kid, Majora's Mask but a lot more frightening.

Toon Link:

We spurt out another timeline that spits sick Spirit Tracks,

Leave you sore and blood and gore, four swords attack!

Zelda:

Kneel before this Hylian, since you're used to doing that for a turtle,

Sheik:

I'm a swift ninja who'll kick this passive princess in the girdle!

Ganondorf:

I conquered the world, while you struggle to hold on to a girl,

Where's Junior's mother, Bowser? She burn you more than the fire you hurl?

Link:

Yo, because I saved the world like fifteen times, rescued the princess from demise,

And I did it like a thousand times better then all these guys.

Mario wish he never fought, but yo, let's see what you got,

I'll smash your ass then loot your remains as if you were a clay pot.

Pokémon Trainer:

You can't step to battle without facing the Master of Pokémon,

From the Pallet Town rookie to the very best, treating the rest as mere pawns.

In the game from X to Y, Black to White, and Red to Blue,

It's time to burn a bitch, Charizard, I choose you!

Charizard:

You don't wanna mess with this motherfucking dragon,

Yoshi do a little ballerina kick while I soar like a falcon.

Squirtle:

Now I don't even need to use any water to drown you out,

I just Squirtle my sick disses and flow, while your games is dry like drought.

Ivysaur:

Watch me spray my seed all over you, speed of a bullet,

And a vine whip. So take that! Triple Finish!

Jigglypuff:

Yo Jiggly is Purin raps and angelic song,

Puff like a balloon to knock you out long before the breath is gone.

Lucario:

Yo it's Lucario, fighting, channeling the aura,

To rain a storm of pain pouring down from generation four.

Greninja:

I don't give a Froakie about your little cheep cheeps,

Sparring jars and punching bricks, you're the real cheap cheaps!

Pichu:

I may be small and cute but I got the potential to bring the hertz,

I evolve like this some Darwin shit, spitting electrifying verse,

Pikachu:

Like a rapping rat attacks like a Rattata or Ratatat electronic crew,

I'm the star of the show and I got the do to volt tackle you.

Mewtwo:

I'm a god amongst men so bow down to Mewtwo,

I have the psychic powers to break the bond between me and you.

An artificial philosopher destroying those; while I, they created,

It's super effective, and all y'all bitches fainted.

Meta Knight:

I'm op in the scene, you can't reach my tier or tear my mask off,

I'm one to turn tides, but this rival trainer is gonna cast off the Pokémon.

King Dedede:

I'm sucking in a group of bitches and spitting back out Dark Matter,

The main man of Dream Land, Waddle-Deeing like Happy Feet and a bit fatter.

Kirby:

Famed pink puffball filling Jigglypuff in with rust,

Think I'll faint? The only thing I won't bite is the dust!

I'm a mothafucking pop star cooking a stew up of mofos,

And y'all prepare for when Popopo kicks the Pokémon in the chinpokos.

Star Fox:

The best set of Corneria's Defense Force, the Star Fox squad,

Tag-teamin' the Star Wolf to crumple Paper Mario to a wad.

Our feet are made of iron, but that's not what's weighing down on Mario,

We can defend against any force so, do a barrel roll!

I'm the best wingman and you can't cross us or our gunning blare,

Riding dirty in our Landmaster! Personally, I prefer the air.

You getting bombarded by Lombardi, you're going O'Down,

So don't step to this high flyer balling up in the McClouds.

Cloud Strife:

Don't talk clouds 'less you wanna start strife,

Heads full of hot "air if" you think you'll win this fight.

You wish to Lockharts, you ain't got a Valentine though,

But by the end, Peach and Zelda will ride me like Chocobo.

You don't "matteria", raps an AVALANCHE and I'll admit it,

Release the Holy past the sky, now I'm breaking limits.

Lifestream the new Smash Bros DLC,

Put you to sleep, have your last dreams...your final fantasy.

Fire Emblem:

All these four and more swordsmen bring more chaos than the four horsemen,

Once we kill y'all off, we won't be seeing you again.

So let's pair up to fuck up these wannabe brawlers,

Level up, man, we're getting harder, better, faster, stronger.

All your fates bring hate and bate, here's your awakening,

Gaiden bitches like the light, yo, this shit radiant.

We go to war, melee, challengers, we beat them,

So don't step to us, we spit Fire, Emblem.

Shulk:

Enough of your cypher, 'cause your games, I can't decipher,

I tangle enough with entire hyper cyber eyesores!

Because in this side-quest I'm destroying an entire Smash battalion,

Ay yo Buzz Lightblade, how's that for Gaiden?

Let's go heart-to-heart, I have an affinity for score,

Can't quip when I'm equipped with this sick Tron sword.

Because I'm mad and I'm fucking you up like the Hulk,

You xenos should have never faced up to the blade of Shulk.

Kid Icarus:

Yeah but Shulk, you couldn't get to America without a kickstart campaign,

The weather up here seems like you're gonna fall, Operation Pain.

Man, you're unbearable. Break more four walls than the Stanley Parable,

I explore worlds seen by Oracles, when we're done, you won't be uprising from your burial.

You're obsessed with light, skinny bitches, yo, that myth is,

No match for Kid Icarus, so you can lickarus this dickarus.

Ain't no mofos mo' Meta than Pit, Dark flow over the Knight,

The queen of light fights tight, melt you all like wings in the sunlight.

Bayonetta:

Alright boys, let's get wicked,

Quicken the pace or diminish Kid Icarus.

You can't see me, I'm artsy like my bullets,

But step too close and Bayonetta will stick a bayonet in a bastard Pit!

Be bewitched, time to twist, got those spiral turns,

Here's the kick, you'll need a lot of water to help with that after-burn.

Don't mess with a witch, you'll be bludgeoned by black magic,

My, my, you're all knocked out before I can even climax.~

Ice Climbers:

You need to chill out.

It's the Ice Climbers and we slice fighters!

We heavyset scaling Everest, compared to you, we straight-up higher.

Because when Popo and Nana come chisel bitches like a condor,

This battle's like a mountain, we leave them both conquered.

We're at our tip-Topi shape, and we don't mean to Nitpick,

But you guys are going so slow that the White Bear is here to rip a bitch.

Our disses are cold like the ice that we climb up,

Yo, we serve rappers the way we serve ice: crushed!

Duck Hunt:

Hunting season's starting, so best be on your guard and,

Armed with the Zapper, shooting you all down like a flying target.

We Duck Hunt duo, fucking up you both,

Kill eskimos and a demo, tick-ticking like a metronome.

I'm the smuggest pug to chuckle at a wild gunman,

You getting hunted by this duck, it's the name of the game, man.

Sniped from the sky, don't need three chances to shoot,

To have us, Duck Hunt, shoot skeet all over you. *Dog laughing*

Pac-Man:

The OG Maze Runner is boutta amaze ya,

When I eat Kirby like just another pac-dot.

I spit shit to scare ghosts, so you better hide,

Cause I'm chasing you like Blinky, Pinky, Inky, and Clyde.

I'm flying down my path and I ain't about to stop, brah,

Fozzie Bear up in this bitch, ay, waka-waka.

The face of the gaming industry just buried you like E.T.

I just split y'all asses in half like the kill screen.

Mr. Game & Watch:

Yo it's Game and Watch and it's gametime!

I'm that guy who's pocketed play worldwide.

You getting squished when I spit fire attack on these fools,

I was in mobile games...before it was cool.

I walk all over all of you, call this Manhole,

Yo, everyone wishes for Silver and Gold.

Judge anyone who steps to the main player since Snoopy,

Dude, I been Balling since 1980.

R.O.B.:

Your Robotic Operating Buddy has just stepped up to ya,

I'm rearranging your craniums like blocks in Stack-Up.

Mister, I'll spin you like a top, show you what handheld really feels,

I've seen better handheld games come out of a Happy Meal.

And Pac, fuck you talking about that face that you claiming?

I had to pull Nintendo out the rubble your dumb ass left on gaming.

R.O.B. on the NES getting sent an LED,

Back off when I blast your ass with a diffusion beam.

Mega Man:

That's enough from WALL•E, it's time for the Blue Bomber to Rock ya,

I'll be Mega blastin your ass and pop a Capcom in ya.

Light left me needing less than an X to defeat you,

I got the crowd cheering for me! (You're my boy, Blue!)

I Rock and Roll the mic, Blue "eff-you"s to the Blues,

Torture your rule thirty fours, call me fifty shades of Blue!

So make like Ashy here's Team Rocket, and blast off,

And take those playing cards, shove them up your Asimov.

Samus Aran:

Well I'd say you really blue-bombed that verse, stick to dispensing wrenches,

I'm the dominant extra-terrestrial-demolishing damsel, the name is Samus.

Call me paper, because I beat Rock,

Best girl in game, since Lara Croft!

No xenoblade can step to the xenomorphs I shoot,

And on the mention of zero, keep your eyes off of the suit.

I know just how to get Rid-ley of you, you getting wrecked, boy,

Revolutionized gaming, raised it up like a Metroid.

Snake:

Eat your robot hearts out.

My raps are Solid. I'm representin' FOXHOUNDS,

Walk and stomp and blow anyone lesser than me to the ground.

Mega, outta beta, you been such a fail, should be in Sega, fool,

It's "puff and pass", not "take a shit on the mic like you think you're cool".

And Samus, I won't hit a girl, but damn sure kill a dame,

You belong on a porno mag strewn about my game.

I got the stealth and I got the weaponry, all you have on me is robo-armor-plates,

So don't you to go Metal Gear and devastate, I go Naked, man, I'm Snake.

Captain Falcon:

I'm the first for the Super Nintendo Entertainment System,

Pac-Man? Mega Man? Man, if they weren't here, I wouldn't have missed them.

Don't slip up, you won't ever recover; I'm in first place while y'all still struggle.

I'm quick-witted and fast-thumbing; so don't mess with Captain Falcon!

Want your speed boost? Bitch, you're out of energy,

Going faster than all of you, I'm reaching Max Velocity.

Out-paced every pixel and the victory is mine,

Don't eff with F-Zero, you're all effing zero. Falcon Punchline!

Sonic the Hedgehog:

You wanna talk fast? Now you got the namesake, Sonic gone and sprint the world from dawn to daybreak,

Cracking eggheads like Mega's knockoff Robotnik, and I don't like it so I wouldn't put a ring on it.

I'll payoff it with chaotic shiny rhymes like an emerald,

Because Sonic's raps are caustic, I'm leaving spit-fire in my trail.

I gotta go fast, can even outrun Usain Bolt,

I'm lapping in rapping and teaching Mario to side-scroll.

I loop the loop and troop my group, none of you are on my Tails,

Hedgehogging the mic like supersonic style, now I prevail!

Ryu:

Yo, the name's Ryu, ripping bitches in the Wii U,

A darker force to come out of Japan since Ryuk.

Let's take this to the streets, see the fighting you can do and,

Y'all best back down when you look at the flicka da wrist! (Hadoken!)

Taking less than forty seconds to wreck you like a Chevy Malibu and,

You push my buttons harder than my strongest Shoryuken.

I'm a Master, you can't muster any strength to beat a spectacle of sight,

Witnessed by a bunch of losers who should know that this is their final fight.

Little Mac:

Ay, Bronx born and raised,

Punch out cold-ass fuckers any time of day.

Swinging fisticuffs from Wii to arcade,

And you know the name, Little Mac has come to play!

Throw all my strength into each punch, I pummel and pound,

A tad lackluster in the air, I still stand my ground.

I've got the fastest fists in this side of the vicinity,

Giga, haymaker, punch holes in ya like you can see through me!

Olimar:

Why don't you Pikmin on someone your own size, little guy?

I stamp a troop of emcees like bouncy fungi.

I'm a captain, it's true, but just between me and you,

Falcon with his hot rod here is a compensating tool. Ha!

My raps rise above the rest like my rocket over these Clouds,

Mixtape so fire, only red Pikmin can survive my Soundcloud.

I strip a planet of aeronautics and them fat stacks as mine to take,

I pick weeds that can whip your ass into shape.

Villager:

Picking weeds? I'd do that over playing your game any day,

They call me the Villager, coming to town, I'm ready to play.

Building you a Dream Home, you can enjoy your destroyer,

I'll pocket a couple crushed Pikmin and display them in my foyer.

Snare a Duck, Falco, or a Falcon like "Pit fall down",

Legislate a hater to kick an ugly gyroid out my town.

Shake a bitch like a tree, catch a butterfly or a stinging bee,

I'm an animal, and you should've never crossed me.

Earthbound:

We're going Ape on this track, you're earthbound to be put to rest,

Diss the west, we're the best, can't compare to Lucas and Ness.

Spitting happy happy to, some dudes whose winning is mu,

Lose your innocence like Mr. Saturn went zoom.

Don't you pigs wish you could surpass PK Flash?

I read their minds, they're about as clueless as Giygas in the past.

These motherfuckers fuck with Mother, it's a chimera thing to think,

Looking at all your series like, this game stinks. Haha!

Wii Fit Trainer:

You're off balance, you're tilting the turntables,

I step all over you and I do it without the cables.

Do we fit? Do Wii Fit, it's all "yo' got" to do,

If the only shape you're in looks like you got the balance bubble inside you.

You better follow my instructions or hit a glitch in the gameplay,

Because when I'm through with you, your spine isn't supposed to twist that way.

Other game accessories zap a giggler, then he's downward-facing dog,

I stand tall like a tree, while all of you are just the log.

Mii Brawler:

Omega Blitz, rapid hits from the main player themselves,

Quick with fists, mess with this and you unleashed my hell.

Mii Swordfighter:

Back off, back off, back off, this Final Edge is what you're messing with,

Skilled with swords and knives and blades, slash and strike up in this bitch.

Mii Gunner:

Gunner's running in, trump others with guns like "you're fired",

I'm going Full Blast, so don't step to Mii, Fighter.

Mii Fighters:

Customized from the beginning, brawl, fence, or guns,

Heck, we can even get our costumes to rap for us.

Inkling (Splatoon):

I bet you're wishing we stayed in the shadows and Banksy'd petty paint jobs,

Cause now the Splatoon crew is rolling in, messing you up in a paint blob.

I'm a boss, just joshing ya, splatter a happy mistake like Bob Ross,

Stacking perks, get off our turf, make it rain on your loss.

Akira Yuki & Jacky Bryant (Virtua Fighter):

OG 3D fracas-casting emcees,

You best not hope for a double knockout when you face me.

Heihachi Mishima (Tekken):

Tekken's taking the mic, Heihachi is hot, he'll,

Throw your ass off a cliff like don't think you'll grab the ledge, bitches keel.

Lloyd Irving (Tales):

I'll resonate with you, bet you wish you could LMBe this,

Step to me and by the end of this battle you be Tales of the Crypt.

Monster Hunter:

Monster Hunter, hunting monsters, now we're destroying you,

To no end, we're like Skyrim before Skyrim was cool!

Gilgamesh (The Tower of Druaga):

This'll be epic, it's Gil, I Pac a punch,

You'll be swimming upstream while I rule between them.

Takamaru (The Mysterious Murasame Castle):

Swift, skilled, stealthy samurai; sandals not staying wet,

Stay aware, I'm not finished in this battle yet.

Announcer:

...Let's get an assist up in here!

Nintendog:

What up, dawg? It's the Nintendo Pet Simulator,

The best canine to grab the mic since Parappa the Rapper.

I'm sorry, am I in the way? Well the camera and the playa love a puppy,

Number one handheld pet since mothafucking Tamagotchi!

Barbara Bat (Jam With the Band):

Time to Jam with the Band, man, Barbara's up to Bat,

Cause who you gonna call, man I got that.

Y'all can push my buttons, you know me,

Because everyone's fave Guitar Hero ain't even got that karaoke.

Dillon (Dillon's Rolling Western):

Downloadin' Dillon, armadillo a little miffed,

Cause when I Grock the mic, you be scrogging, and I blaze it.

Rolling west, stick to east, I'm a rock-hard danger,

So don't draw duel with Dillon, the last ranger.

Ray MK III (Custom Robo):

Hear that NOISE? It's Ray, and I-I-I'm hitting that mark,

Harder than our beloved Zelda and his glitchy Z-Target.

Rawest artist since the Renaissance is, call that rebirth,

You needin that handicap blast your ass to the nothing that you're worth.

Dr. Wright (SimCity):

Watch the earth beneath you start to rumble and go,

Cause I know the wright way to earthquake like the SimCity was San Fransisco.

Where there's a Will, there's a way, to construct your deaths,

I shine bright like the crystal shining above my head.

Jill (Drill Dozer):

Does that shake you? Well it's sure to get me rumbled,

Screw Breaker, Drill Dozer, red diamond and I'll leave you pummeled.

I'm kicking this up to third gear, I can drill through any one of you,

One hit on you and I fuck you up like Croog.

Takamaru (The Mysterious Murasame Castle):

Takamaru, straight outta Murasame,

Assassin's Creed, up my sleeve, step out the way.

Just try to get outta my Ninja Castle,

And I'll use my multidirectional pinwheel knife rook attack, ooh!

Kururin:

Kururin, Helirin, helicopter, going chopper,

How 'bout spitting faster than I'm spinning and I be going harder.

Your stupidity is puzzling like the mazes I fly through,

I may ride a platform but now I walk all over you.

Saki Amamiya (Sin and Punishment):

Amamiya, here we go again,

All of you sinned, and now I've got your punishment.

Wits of a dolphin, gunsword attack,

So stay away from Smash or suck Saki's sack.

Dr. Kawashima (Brain Age):

Hahahaha! You petty right-brained dorks don't balance out,

The mind of a neuroscientist, it's my job in this bout.

How many red losers do you see when I raise hell?

Haha! You're at crawling pace. Your brain age is 12.

Sheriff:

Quick draw, the law is on my side,

I'm the sheriff of this town, so you best run and hide.

'Cause I mow through bandidos like grass,

Eight directions, two joysticks, and one fast kick-your-ass.

Starfy:

I'm at the Pufftop of my game, Stafy's joined the game,

Nautical pop star, man, I make Kirby look lame.

Yo, just look at my face, I'm the fucking definition of kawaii,

Finding treasures, rocking tropics, from Fiji to Hawaii.

Infantry and Tanks (Advance Wars):

I'll be the first to advance, it's the Infantry and Tanks!

Out to war before 9/11, or is that meme too dank?

Hear that siren, we be firing, man, you're done,

Fam, come, we win the wars of Famicom.

Excitebike:

I'm too exciting for you, get out of my way,

Or my buddies and I will pummel any challengers in the pave-

Ment. We need a cool down, because our raps are too hot,

We're undeniably awesome, Excitebike rocks the spot!

Isaac (Golden Sun):

Fly high like a robin, get caught in my flame,

You best Move, or just talk to the hand.

I got that Psyenergy, better than any Poké Psyduck,

I'm Golden, carrying on my Weyard Sun.

Devil (Devil World):

Follow instruction, motherfucker, I got my name on the title,

Which means I got the world in my control, all the while,

You guys are fighting for honor, I'm a god, once I'm seen,

I move the entire fucking screen!

Prince of Sablé (Kaeru no Tame ni Kane wa Naru):

You're in quite the Jam facing the Sablé Prince,

If the wannabe Agent 47 over there is snake-strikin'.

A kiss for the frog prince? Haha! You can kiss the ass of a toad,

I just served you all. A la mode.

Pong (Color TV-Game 15):

The very first video game to ever hit the market,

And you really thought that'd I'd miss the target,

But even if I do miss, then the point is mine,

I either keep the game going, or I win it every time.

Got that Ping Pong, sing song, back-and-forth rap battle,

I have it all, call me shit's creek, 'cause you ain't grabbing my paddle.

I had no lag, no bad, and my reign is lasting long,

Everyone cheers for the OG. It's all downhill after Pong.

Master Hand:

A new challenger approaches, motherfucker.

I was gonna give you a hand in the end, but deep inside I'd rather destroy you all,

The best thing to happen to Nintendo since Mario threw his hand down his overalls!

Masturwhat? Master Hand! The final challenger lasts.

While y'all are ugly af and you still wanna Smash!

So, hey, why not? I'll stop and teach all you fake playas a lesson,

Heck, this battle's already been lasting longer than our fanfiction.

If the Master's battle is for the taking, I'll be the Master taker,

So Super Mario...prepare to meet your Maker!

Legend of Zelda? Please, you're like Legend of Hell Nah,

The Humane Society called, they say that they prefer Digimon.

This pink circle ain't stepping to Sakurai's favorite creation,

While Star Fox is still surprised he evaded cancelation.

A fantasy; you got your head in the clouds. It's all in names,

And I wouldn't even know Fire Emblem existed if it weren't for this game.

Here's a chronicle: watch me grind the gears of this Square,

Shoot you out the air; more treasured than her arrow.

Bayonetta, you'd work better as a Bond babe,

And Ice Climbers, have fun stuck in Brawl and Melee. Haha!

The first first-person shooter; thanks to you we now have Call of Duty,

You're a druggy cheese wheel chased by colored sheets, 2Sp00ky.

Ain't Advancing any Games when we're stuck with big-nose Boy,

I'll R.O.B. a victory from R.O.B., go back to playing with your toys.

You don't belong with us, go back to Capcom. Nintendo master race,

I'm about to send an Alien rip-off back out into space.

Hide back in your shell of a cardboard box, or I'll break your mind like Mantis,

I'll be drinking Falcon Punch! I'll be chomping Captain Crunch! YES!

Sanic's making Master go manic, you copying scumbag,

Street Fighter ain't a challenge when compared to Mortal Kombat.

What's quick with fists gonna help against this Master's pound?

I'll take you and your spuds and put you all back in the ground.

Why don't you cry to your momma? Get kicked off of my turf.

You kids are the most unnecessary thing to stroll on Mother Earth.

The fucking Kinect gets families off their asses better than you,

And you, Mii, can't step to me, you are as redundant as the Wii U.

I don't need no assist, ain't afraid of no NPC,

This like your Final Destination facing up against me!

So put your hands up and clap with me,

'Cause any other than the Master winning is Tabuu, it's Crazy.

I think it's about time I put my toys away,

'Cause I just kicked y'all's asses, heard the announcer say-

Announcer:

GAME! Epic Rap Battles of History!

Poll
And the winner is: Mario Legend of Zelda Pokémon Kirby Star Fox Final Fantasy Fire Emblem Xenoblade Kid Icarus Bayonetta Ice Climbers Duck Hunt Pac-Man Game and Watch R.O.B. Mega Man Metroid Metal Gear F-Zero Sonic the Hedgehog Street Fighter Punch Out Pikmin Animal Crossing Earthbound Wii Fit Mii Fighters and Costumes Assist Trophies Master Hand