User blog:The Flatwoods Monster/Sam vs Michael Myers - Epic Rat Battles of Horror Season 2 Halloween Special

Well would you look at that, I'm finally bad from my way-too-long-writing-process for this Halloween special. Further more, before reading this, go read Lexi's blog about her having to take a small absence - It's way more important then this. Done? Cool. Anyways, I really wanted to get this out on the weekend, but alas, I'm hosting a Haunted Trail for charity and will have no such time to post this, so here it is - In the spirit of spooky scary skeletons and the like, Samhain (otherwise known as SAM) from the Trick 'r Treat franchise goes to battle with Michael Myers, arguably the third most popular Slasher, to see which Halloween-based murderer will come out on top as the Hallowinner. Blah blah blah you can forget about that pun now. This battle was suggested by a bunch of people, but I was only able to find the comments from TheScottBird and GIR 5 Life, so if you suggested this and I forgot you, my apologies. As you know, lovely title cards by J1Coupe. Point aside, here's the battle, in all it's glory. Enjoy, and Happy Halloween.

(also, quick note, I'd like to point out that my Halloween special is the thirteenth battle of Season 2... that's pretty awesome)

Cast
Samhain - EpicLLOYD

Michael Myers - Nice Peter (video), MrCreepyPasta (audio)

Freddy Krueger (Cameo) - Nice Peter

Jason Voorhees (Cameo) - EpicLLOYD

Instrumental - Hard Horror Hip-Hop beat

Introduction
Announcer: (0:11)

EPIC RAT BATTLES OF HORROR!



VS!



BEGIN!

The Battle
Samhain (0:22)

(Ding-dong!)

TRICK OR TREAT! Better give me something good to eat!

Else I’ll bring the heat! Tear off your feet! Punch in all of your teeth!

If you step to me, I’ll shred you into meat, my lines are candy sweet!

I’ll leave you out of this fight, like how you weren’t even in Halloween three!

Samhain is bringing the damn pain! I’ll shred you into fucking confetti!

I might as well be facing Jason, minus the horror and the machete!

You’re not ready! I’ll twist your arm bone, things are gonna get deadly,

When it comes to Slashers, you’re the worst! Go crying back to Freddy!

Think you can slam on this champ? You’re just another carbon copy, kid!

I don’t need your cliched knife to mess you up worse than Rob Zombie did!

I’m about to take you to school! I REPRESENT Ghosts and Ghouls!

You’d better be trembling in my presence, ‘cause SAM makes the rules!

Michael Myers: (0:54)

He's back. To stomp this brat with raps who hopes to burn me with rhymes,

Well I’ve been set on fire before, so I hope you’ve packed some better lines,

Nobody knows you anymore, while I’m at the peak of my fame, best in my prime,

So I’ll equip my knife tonight and bring some strife to a Sam a SECOND time!

Check your permissions- I'm one of the best additions to Horror Flicks,

Lose the bag ‘o tricks, you just kill people for not following Holiday tradition,

We know you’ve got conditions and you’re admitting you can’t boot me!

You’re killing loosely in one movie while I’m slashing through Call of Duty!

This morbid defect is just a social reject who doesn’t need to be wrecked to see,

That his Spider-Man crawling and regenerative powers will have no effect on me!

I’m on the big screen, teaching this drama queen how to scream when I spit mean, you

Can go right ahead and flip me the bird, they’ll just make that a deleted scene, too

Samhain: (1:27)

Man, die! You know I’ll be stealing this victory from you by a landslide!

Your damn VERSE is scarier than you! And it dragged on like your franchise!

So cackle, I’ve got rhymes like Razors in your Apple to make you fall!

The Return of Michael Myers is being cut short! From the darkness, I see ALL!

Michael Myers: (1:38)

You’ve felt the Revenge of Michael Myers, and you won’t be getting a remake,

You may be the one who fights nonbelievers, but theres no use in fighting fate

I’ll eat this sucker for supper and let his blood flow through the gutters,

Slice through you like Butter - Happy Halloween, motherfucker!

Announcer: (1:49)

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDEEEE!

EPIC RAT BATTLES...

(Background noises of a witch cackling and an owl hooting play)

OF HORROR!

Outro


Who won? Sam Michael Myers