Talk:Epic Rap Battles of History 27/@comment-5508865-20121206203015

(from HarryPotter2875)

Christopher Columbus and Moses aren't just holiday figures. They're much more.

Also, update the lyrics, cause I see there's some errors, including "Sweet robes Obi" which should be "Sweet robes, albeit". EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY! MOSES! VERSUS! SANTA CLAUS! BEGIN!

Santa Claus: Sweet robes, albeit one too many days in the sun Stop preaching homie, teach your flock to covet some fun! I bring joy every year, man I represent cheer You represent sandals and a scraggly beard I'm from the North Pole, that's why my rhymes are so cold! I spit diamonds but I'm serving up some fresh coal You've been a naughty boy, you brought a plague of frogs You'd best arrest yourself, you broke your own law Or was there something in Rule Six I didn't understand? My list says kill the Egyptian Jew, buried him in sand I read your book, you got a strict religion No bacon, but mandatory circumcision? I'm a jolly bowl of jelly, giving holiday presents But all the chosen people ever get for Christmas is jealous!

Moses: When I was high up on the mountain God revealed the truths of the Earth But he never mentioned a fat-ass Papa Smurf It takes nine reindeers to haul your fat ass You took the Christ out of Christmas and just added mo' mass You need to stop breakin' into houses and creepin' and peepin' On naughty kids while they sleepin' and keep yo' hands off my stockin' Don't you ho-ho me! I'll split yo ass in half, like I did the Red Sea You ain't a saint, you a slaver, like a pharaoh in the snow Stop with the unpaid labor, and let my little people go!

Elves: We ain't slaves! All that sand turned your brains to mush!

Santa Claus: I think you need to stop smokin' all that burnin' bush

Elves: Yeah, we're magical workers, man! We hang with reindeers Yo! Here's a GPS! Who gets lost for forty years?

Santa Claus: You're a glorified secretary, so write this down

Elf: Because this night

Santa Claus: Santa Claus is comin' to town

Moses: So much drama in the Israel BC It's kinda hard talkin' directly to the G-O-single-D Hand me my chisel, I got a new commandizzle for y'all Thou shalt not let your children sit on a grown man's lap at the mall I'll beat you ten times before the bread can rise, you dummy And walk off into the land of my milk and honeys

WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE! EEEEEEEEPIC, EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY! Show less
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