User blog:The Bespectacled Guy/BRBH 5: Matt Groening VS Dante Alighieri MEANINGS

Link to the actual battle

Matt Groening:
The name's Matthew Groening, but this schmuck can call me Matt,

(Despite his real name being Matthew, Groening is always referred to as 'Matt', and originally planned for that to also be the name of Bart from the Simpsons. He also insults Dante.)

I'll leave you flattened, smashed and dead, like Snowball the cat!

(The Simpsons family have had numerous cats over the years, almost all of which have been called Snowball. A running joke is that each different 'Snowball' dies sooner or later, often by being run over by a car. Groening says that he will leave Dante in a similar state.)

You're just a poor, weak, weird, lonely, exiled novelist!

(Groening gives a list of adjectives that he believes applies to Dante.)

I'm so rich I make Mr. Burns look impoverished!

(He then contrasts this description of Dante with his own lifestyle, being rich and famous. Mr Burns is the tyrannical, billionaire owner of Springfield Power Plant in The Simpsons, and Groening is stating that he is so wealthy, even Mr Burns seems poor in comparison to him.)

Your own people hated your ass and you know it to be true,

(When Dante was exiled from Florence in 1301, the city officials order he pay a massive fine. Dante refused, and consequently was never allowed back in Florence, with officials warning that he'd be burned at the stake if he ever attempted to return.)

I got armies of fans, you got real armies tryin' to kill you!

(Groening notes the differences between the two of them once more, pointing out that he has a massive fanbase for his work, while Dante didn't exactly do a very good job about making friends with opposing politicians, which later backfired on him, to say the least...)

Sorry man, but you aren't loved by that Beatrice ho,

(Throughout his life, despite already having a wife, Dante was enamoured with a woman named Beatrice Portinari. He only met her a few times, though. Groening claims that she doesn't love him.)

'Cause last night I took her all the way to Paradiso!

(Groening continues his last line to inform Dante that he had sex with Beatrice the previous night. 'Paradiso' means 'paradise' in Italian, and is also the title of the third part of Dante's most famous poem, The Divine Comedy.)

Your Comedy isn't funny and your poetry is trite,

(The aforementioned Divine Comedy is noted by Groening again here, who points out that, despite being called a comedy, it isn't a funny poem at all (though this is because the word held a different meaning then). He also notes that the poem has been accused of copying a Muslim text, the 'Kitab al Miraj', which allegedly holds some similarities.)

If your rapping's bad as that you ought to step back from the mic!

(Groening suggests that, given the shortcomings of Dante's poetry, he doubts Dante's rapping will be any good.) To be continued...