Bruce Banner vs Bruce Jenner



Bruce Banner vs Bruce Jenner is the sixty-third installment of Epic Rap Battles of History and the fifth episode of Season 5. It will feature comic book superhero and scientist, Bruce Banner, against against former athlete, Bruce Jenner. Partway through the battle, both transform into The Hulk and Caitlyn Jenner respectively. It will be released on June 27.

Cast
Nice Peter as Bruce Jenner

EpicLLOYD as Bruce Banner

NoShame as Caitlyn Jenner

??? as The Hulk

Bruce Banner:
I'll school you in this battle of the baddest Bruce,

With your He-Man haircut and your Daisy Dukes.

I hear you're good at running; you're just like the Flash!

Especially in the 100 meter ditch-your-wife dash!

I'm an ace in the lab; acid, base, and treble,

So let me break you down on the molecular level:

You turned one gold medal to a lifetime of green!

The most overrated athlete anyone's ever seen!

You need to carry fatherhood across that finish line!

(Urgh!) Kept up with the Kardashians, but left some kids behind!

Run along, you'll thank me 'cause I'm getting kinda cranky!

Trust me, you wouldn't like me when I'm angry!

Bruce Jenner:
I think you're in your element when you're behaving badly.

Honestly, you're kinda boron when you're happy.

I'll lap and pass your ass ten different ways!

Decathlon athlete, blast through you like some gamma rays!

The truth is, there's no truce between the Bruces!

You're a drifter being useless; I'm a winner, no excuses!

(Uh!) Beautiful women all up on my jock!

I got a home gym; check me on a cereal box, doc!

You big green freak, don't try to flex!

If it wasn't for your cousin, you'd never have sex!

(Oh!) You're so strong when you get mad!

Too bad you can't go back and protect your mom from your dad!

The Hulk:
(Urrrgh!) That brand new face don't give you class!

Just one more thing Bruce do for cash!

Best thing you make: Kylie ass!

She eighteen? Hulk smash!

Caitlyn Jenner:
That's my teenage daughter, man; I have to forbid this!

I'll put a javelin through your jolly green discus!

Kylie not the type of girl I'm gonna let you smash on!

You'll get the medal without the decathlon!

The Hulk:
(Argh!) Hulk is Hulk; no identify as man!

Me thinks Cait might understand!

Not gender issue; this Jenner issue!

Just you being you is enough to diss you!

Caitlyn Jenner:
Look, I understand that you hate yourself,

But you don't need to blame yourself!

You're a Tyga; stop trying to tame yourself!

You gotta be big enough to contain yourself,

And get hit with a little forgiveness!

Be green; that ain't none of my business,

But if you think you're looking good in those torn-ass clothes,

You're Lion, Witch means you need a new Wardrobe!

(Aw!) The vision of those shorts kinda scarred me.

What, did you just rage at a Barney-themed party?

That's probably not something you seen as a child!

Not one day did you see your daddy smile!

Hulk not strong enough to deal with denial

Man, you down easy. (???)

Examine this under your microscope:

You got no neck, but you'll still fucking choke!

After battling me, you're gonna always be pissed,

So the Hulk will stay forever; neither Bruce will exist!