Rasputin

"Try messin' with the Mad Monk, you'll be sorry, yo!"

- Rasputin

Rasputin was the first of the five rappers in Rasputin vs Stalin, battling Joseph Stalin, Vladimir Lenin, Mikhail Gorbachev, and Vladimir Putin (though Lenin, Gorbachev, and Putin appeared afterwards). He was portrayed by Nice Peter.

Information on the rapper
Grigori Yefimovich Rasputin (Russian: Григорий Ефимович Распутин (Новых); Grigoriy Yefimovich Rasputin) (January 21, 1869 – December 30, 1916) was a Russian mystic and advisor to the Russian Imperial family (the Romanovs). After gaining a reputation as a holy man and being able to heal the sick, Rasputin was invited by Tsar Nicholas II and his wife Alexandra as a healer for the tsar's son, Tsarevich Alexei, who was perilously ill. In the following years, Rasputin became very influential at the court of Tsar Nicholas, being seen as a psychic and faith healer. He impressed many people with his knowledge and his ability to explain the Bible in an uncomplicated manner.

As Rasputin became more popular, he also gained more enemies. Rasputin got the nickname "The Mad Monk" because he held many drunken parties and was rumored to be heavily interested in sexual relations with his followers. Alexandra grew very dependent on Rasputin and rumours circulated about her having possible sexual involvement with him. He gained several roles in high government, by which he gained great influence on matters of state. This helped to destroy the general respect for the Tsar and Tsarina. Rasputin died on December 30, being killed by a group of noblemen. They first poisoned him by giving him poisoned wine and pastries with cyanide, but Rasputin survived. Then he was shot and stabbed several times, but he was still alive. He eventually was thrown into the ice-cold Neva River. However, the regime's image continued being tainted by the scandal. Within 3 months after his death, Tsar Nicholas lost his throne and the first revolution had started, with many historians now regarding Rasputin as a catalyst for this event.

Lyrics
Cool mustache, Wario.

Try messing with the Mad Monk, you'll be sorry, yo!

How many dictators does it take

To turn an empire into a union of ruinous states?

It's a disgrace what you did to your own people!

Your daddy beat you like a dog and now you're evil!

You're from Georgia, sweet Georgia,

And history books unfold ya

As a messed up mutha fucka bent in the mind,

Who built a superpower, but it paid the price

With the endless destruction of Russian lives!

If you're the man of steel, I spit kryptonite!

Big dick mystic, known to hypnotize!

I can end you with a whisper to your wife.

Scrapped lyrics
Come on, bring it on, I'm ready to start brawlin'

I don't mean to Russia, but you just seem like you're Stalin

You're just five-foot-four but your failure's epic-sized

You're doing worse in this battle than the farms you collectivized

I'll beat you past the point my magic powers can heal

Man of Steel? You fat pig, more like Man of Squeal

I'll hand your Georgian ass a true Russian defeat

You would think I'm making borscht the way I'm crushing these beats

I was poisoned, shot and beaten and I still fought back like no sweat

I'm so hard to kill, my rap name should be 50 Kopek

I was shot and poisoned, my assassin's plot: sadistic

But that couldn't stop the mystic, if you think you can, you're optimistic