User blog:Panchamp98/Epic Rap Battle Parodies Literal Review: Ask Ketchum VS Gary Oak

Gary Oak:Edit
I'm the true Pokémon master, all you do is play with Balls!

What else would you expect in this battle

So take a seat, Ash, I'll show you how to catch 'em all!

I saved Ash a seat :P

I'm a prodigy in Pallet Town, you're just in Special Ed,

I believe that that's the other way around

It takes more than a generation to see Misty in your bed!

''like you've got anything better... wait, the cheerleaders, nevermind''

I'mma cap your ass like a Rattatat, flame on like a Vulpix!

It's Rattata, it's a top percent pokemon

I'll send out Hitmonlee to give your ass a million kicks!

well you go and do that

'''What's the matter, Ashy boy? You want healing from Nurse Joy?'''

"Healing" from Nurse Joy is a great thing

Ass Ketchup mess with my Pokémon is sure to get destroyed!

HE MADE FUN OF HIS NAMES HURHUR

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">I'll serve you a handheld defeat that'll fit in your pocket,

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">It won't fit if it's a 2DS D:<

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">Don't let your ego blast off more than Team Rocket!

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">I can just imagine that: " I WILL WIN! -pew-"

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">My pops is a professor, so I have all the knowledge that I need!

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">1: He's your grandpa 2: He barely knows who you are, you forgets your anme AND gender

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">I'll be rising up, while you're smoking Bulbasaur weed!

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">Bulbasaur weed is very beneficial to the body, as studies say

Ash Ketchum:Edit
<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">'''I'm the very best! I'm banging on my chest!'''

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">Generic lines for the win

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">Like a Ferrow going apeshit, it's time for the real test!

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">Not a math test!

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">I'm majestic like Ho-Oh, I spit it hot and Gold,

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">Ho-oh is the weaker of the two so you're saying that you suck

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">I'm like a Blastoise, because I have lyrical water flow!

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">MAKE UP YOUR GOD DAMNED MIND!

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">I'mma beat you so hard, you won't be using a healing berry.

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">''don't you mean potion? Berries don't heal for that much''

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">I mean, you're as homosexual as a dancing Clefairy.

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">but most Clefairys are female so it's more straight

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">You're forgetting that the entire anime revolves around me,

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">''Oh really, I thought that those almost a thousand of episodes were just of you and your friends exaggerrating all the fucking problems which you come across, I mean seriously, can't you go one day without any problems? In fact, it's gotten to the point where you don't even care about Team Rocket anymore, or at least those two screw-ups but that's actually understandable''

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">Soon as we went to Sinnoh, that was the last time you were ever seen.

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">but Gary motherfucking Oak still lives on in the memories of every kid, every where

Gary Oak:Edit
<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">Stop being so Gloom, you're acting like a Slowbro.

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">naming off pokemon names for the greater good, yay

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">You're a rip off of Yugi, hell, maybe even more homo!

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">''please, all those girls he's been with have tried to be with hi- erm... I see what you mean''

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">My disses just evolved, teach you to mess with my crew,

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">can't teach anyone everything, more specificallly, Ash is to dull and senseless to understand the simplest terms

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">'''And you wonder who the real master is? I don't choose you!'''

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">and that is the sad life of the Unova starters

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">You're identified as a "wannabe champion" in my Pokédex,

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">that's what everybody is

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">You've been surrounded by girls, yet you still haven't had sex!

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">point taken

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">Now listen here, Ash, time for the ultimate burn.

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">you better use a burn heal for this

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">Magikarp is the name you deserve to earn!

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">holy shit that line was so awesome, would have sex with if it was a person/10

Ash Ketchum:Edit
<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">I'm kickin' it Old School, Black and White to Red and Blue.

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">''Color to... some color''

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">I got an army of leaders, come and fight me and my crew.

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">make that only three leaders, Brock, Misty, and Clemont

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">Trap you with my rhymes like a Master Ball, feel the hate?

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">not really

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">That's 'cause you're too busy substituting "ball" with "bate"

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">I must admit that this is a good burn

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">Don't be hating on my love life, I'll make yours darken,

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">you don't even have a love life

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">I bet when you whipped out your Metapod, it didn't use harden.

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">erectile dysfunction for you, it's a thing

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">That's the end of it, let's roll the credits theme song.

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">Generic lines

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">'''Gotta catch 'em all! Gotta kick your ass, Pokémon!'''

<p style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;">and that's the end of it