User blog:Alanomaly/Alanomaly Rap Battles 1 - Big Time Rush vs Flight of the Conchords

Alright, now, I know Bolt vs Gump is listed as the first battle of my series, but I figure why not start off with something I've been wanting to do for a while and finally got it done? :P

So this battle features the boy band, Big Time Rush, battling the New Zealand duo, Flight of the Conchords, to see which of these two bands is more worthy of a television show, whether aimed more towards kids or adults.

Lyrics
(Kendell's lyrics are in blue , James' are in orange, Carlos' are in aqua , Logan's are in tan , Jemaine's are in red , and Bret's are in green , and when they rap together the text is white.)

ALANOMALY RAP BATTLES

BIG TIME RUSH

VS

FLIGHT OF THE CONCHORDS

Big Time Rush
Do you want to, ride in a big limousine?

Then you better stay away from FOTC.

Television Forgot About You, now go back to your 7/11.

We're taking over, rocking country clubs, 24/seven.

I'll strap on my helmet then tackle these old fools with my rhymes.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(0,191,255);">Then afterwards, with The Most Beautiful Girl, I'll spend my time.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(240,230,140);">I'm the brains of the group, call me a Big Time Dream.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(240,230,140);">Our ice rink has cooler scenes than your instrumental theme.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(0,0,255);">From the snow to LA,  <span style="color:rgb(255,140,0);">we quickly arose to fame.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(0,191,255);">We gotta bleach this fruit,  <span style="color:rgb(240,230,140);">your Australian fingers can taint.

<p style="text-align:start;">You against us, you're barely even competing.

<p style="text-align:start;">Crushing these Conchords like it's Big Time Beating!

Flight of the Conchords
<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(139,0,0);">Y’know, you don’t really know who you’re dealing with

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(139,0,0);">And with those wack rhymes of yours, I feel bad for One Republic.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(0,100,0);">I’m the Rhymenocerous, I flip you the birds from on my back

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(0,100,0);">And I’m in a horny mood for talkin smack

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(0,100,0);">Against a band of tangerine pro-teen maniacs.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(139,0,0);">They call me the Hiphopopotamus, lyrics are bottomless... Uh... [clears throat]

<p style="text-align:start;">[Instrumental break as Jemaine and Bret do a dance break, until Jemaine manages to think of what to say.]

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(139,0,0);">They call me the Hiphopopotamus, lyrics glow like phosphorus.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(139,0,0);">Poppin extreme disses off the top of this esophagus

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(139,0,0);">To the worst show on Nickelodeon since Drake & Josh’s permanent hiatus.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(0,100,0);">We’re both wild, yet trained, domesticated

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(0,100,0);">You’ll give up your recording time just to be dated.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(0,100,0);">You’re terrorizing your boss, <span style="color:rgb(139,0,0);">while we’re Cheering Up Murray.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(139,0,0);">Now excuse us while we go to those three Sexy Ladies.

Big Time Rush
<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(0,0,255);">We’re halfway there, we’re up to 5, gonna peel off your beard.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(0,191,255);">Jemaine’s smile that was never there is about to disappear.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(240,230,140);">Just step out of the game before we Pressure you like the Inner City.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(255,140,0);">And here I thought Gustavo’s audition sessions were shitty,

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(255,140,0);">But then when I compare that to you, they turn almost my level of pretty.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(0,0,255);">You go where the party takes you, we’re the ones starting the party.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(0,0,255);">Let’s open up the valves,  then we’ll really get things started!

Flight of the Conchords
<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(0,100,0);">Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(139,0,0);">No, I'm thinking what I'm thinking.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(0,100,0);">So you're not thinking what I'm thinking?

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(139,0,0);">No, but I am thinking what you think I'm thinking.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(139,0,0);">We're about to make it rain on their faces.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(0,100,0);">You're battling us, but only cause You Wanna Be Famous.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(0,100,0);">Leave us, Mother Uckers, go back to Minnesota.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(0,100,0);">Our rhymes make you go owowowowoowoaoa.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(139,0,0);">We used to be immature like you, then we took knives and forks to the knee.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(139,0,0);">You don't got music, sounds more like a screaming junkie with monkey disease.

<p style="text-align:start;"><span style="color:rgb(139,0,0);">Without emotion, this time, so that they won't be misled.

<p style="text-align:start;">We'll let the robots know that Big Time Rush is dead!

Poll
Who Won? Big Time Rush Flight of the Conchords