User blog:UniqueMAX/Epic Fan Rap Battle: Bruce Banner vs Henry Jekyll

BEGIN
  Dr Jekyll 

Not epic, no, this better should be called “Glorious”

The battle between the Marvelous and the Victorious.

Get it? So how you win the fight and keep calm

When I drop a verse on you like I’m a gamma ray bomb?



I’m a large man!

with a social position.

You’re me, man!

with a Frankenstein addition.

You see this? A product of a scientific thought to

Compare with a silly accident that you’ve been brought to.



After my examination, you are nothing but a geek!

Never been kissed, number one on beating list,

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">And now, after getting pissed, your brain drops to gluteus, doc.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">So, what gives? You added bigger pants and a bigger sock.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Solving me is like Beal Conjecture Equation,

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Whether you be grey or green or even Asian.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Read this banner, it says “Proceed with caution”,

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">‘Cause rapping is like sex for you: not an option.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt"> Bruce Banner 

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Hello, Doctor Jek-ass, I hope you brought your serum,

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">As what I spit is axiom against your false theorem.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">I can’t lose control from your premature burns.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">I only cringe at your look and laugh at your sideburns.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">You won’t get!

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0.0001pt;margin-left:72px;">through this molecular analysis.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">You aren’t more!

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0.0001pt;margin-left:72px;">than any of my story legacies.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Go back to dinner parties or call your dark side.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">But, please, let me finish, before committing suicide.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">So, as they say, when you drink a strange potion,

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">You unleash your inner asshole, full of negative emotion?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">In the morning, you wake up and can’t remember a thing?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">It’s not a split personality. You’re drunk. Have some aspirin.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Don’t get on my nerves, or things are gonna get messy.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">I’ll drop you off the roof, like my name is Van Helsing.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Being stranger to terms like “family” or “friend”,

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">But don’t worry, I’ll bring the life of that unhappy Henry to an end.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt"> Edward Hyde 

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Henry’s not home. I’m Edward Hyde.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Do some action, and maybe you succeed at fourth try.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">I’m a permanent icon, they overwrite your fate,

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">You look so tiny and innocent, B.B. Eight

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Next lines are gonna ruin your day.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">You’ll have lexicon issues, so listen what I say.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">You’re an incredible

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top:0cm;margin-right:0cm;margin-bottom:0cm; margin-left:35.4pt;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-indent:35.4pt">property

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top:0cm;margin-right:0cm;margin-bottom:0cm; margin-left:70.8pt;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-indent:35.4pt">damage,

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top:0cm;margin-right:0cm;margin-bottom:0cm; margin-left:106.2pt;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-indent:35.4pt">lad,

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Especially when you went on Tony stark raving mad.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Better look at that bloody cardio meter.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">I won’t any longer keep myself from going bitter.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">I’ll end with you, Mr Banner, like your daddy did with your mom.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">And judging by you, she really had a green thumb.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">What’s wrong, mister shivery glasses?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">I thought you are used to domestic harassments.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Weren’t you the one to school some anger issue classes?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">‘Cause Edward knows how to kick some asses!

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt"> Hulk 

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">(Aaargh!) Hulk not scared

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Of dirty drug slave.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Smash your face over Stevenson’s grave!

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Hulk give time

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">For Hyde to hide.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Me see more horror in Edward from Twilight.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">You threaten me?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Bitch! Please!

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Me fight big monsters, you run from police.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Hulk grow huge,

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Hyde is small.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Me better swallow you whole!

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt"> Mr Hyde: 

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Oh, swallow you will, but now, piss off, Hogan!

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">I’m too big of a pill, you call me Old Man Logan!

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Look, Banner’s gone, as you two cannot coexist.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Hell, you’ve just had another Civil War that you missed!

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt"> Hulk 

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Fair... for you. But Bruce is here.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">That’s why Hulk is strong and thoughts are clear.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Pack your Case, Hyde been overrun,

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">As I read it. Your puny body count be one.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Me smell a coward in front of my wrath.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">You be no monster. You sociopath.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt">Joke about sex? Yes, I can. Your only affair be Invisible Man!

WHO WON?

WHO CARES?

YOU DECIDE!

Bruce Banner / Hulk

Henry Jekyll / Edward Hyde