User blog:Joeaikman/Rap Battle - Katniss Everdeen vs Robin Hood

Hi all! Welcome to another rap battle by me, this time featuring one of my personal favourite suggestions. The tights wearing outlaw of Nottingham against the revolutionary survivor of District 12. Victor vs Victor. Archer vs Archer. Champion vs Champion. They battle today to find out who the best forest dwelling archer is. Coming soon will be my versions of battles we speculate ERB may soon be doing, always with a little twist of course. I hope you enjoy this one, folks. Thanks to Jude and Grav for proofreading and Avatar for saving my coding.

Robin Hood
Tuck away your chances, Locksley has it locked in

be swallowing more toxins as you see you’re forgotten

Dresses won’t save you, your rhymes are Chaffed

Get up in my hood and odds are you'll be halved

I be Robin' from the rich victors, deliver to the poor

What Catnip and her goldigger can easily afford

Hot broth lines set me up as winner for the tour

Getting her ass handed back to 1984

It's all Battle Royale in the arena with Peeta

Berry much a cheater, made reluctant leader

I could make a Career out of squashing brutes

As you’re flipping coins, birds and scout salutes

You cruelly abandoned Homes, Finnick and Castor

So you could pursue a sickly happy ever after

In this battle to determine the most heroic archer

You best remember Rue, Prim and your father

Katniss Everdeen
Firing straight to Panem, go harder than a martyr

A myth brit ain’t aware he’s just a dark ages Arthur

I fought for my family, you fought only for yourself

Cos you lost lands, titles and all the inherited wealth

Guy’s story is whack, about a Maid he ain’t Marryin'

If I’m facing archer vigilantes then Tell has more comparisons

Don’t Gloss over this, I’m Hungering for the win

I’ve endured all kinds of shit, let the real rapping begin

I’ve got the golden flows, I’m arrow head on point

You’re a Queen from DC and Hawkin' for the joint

You know what they want, I’ll give them a show

Take down lymey Jesse James with an arrow and bow

You go for the bollocks like Pollux for the best shot

Get Gale to throw rocks and then I’ll score a headshot

On this Avox, aim hot and always bring home the bacon

Cut out an outlaw's tongue, he’ll have nothing to say then

Robin Hood
Your life hijacked by rebels, forced to play the Mockingjay

Had it all your own way and you’d happily have run away

You can set traps for me but know I'm on your trail

Skilled archers know how to shoot straight through a Gale

One lover killed your sister, the other's a traitor baker

Like someone rewrote Twilight only three years later

You poached clichés, I Marvel at the outfits of a whore

I'm standing up to the sheriff, you're twirling for the poor

Katniss Everdeen
What did you say about Marvel? His death is all I see when my eyes close

Then putting an arrow through Cato and the mangled corpse of Clove

Ripping wire from Wiress, Cecilia's three kids crying back at her home

Finnick dying in the drains and then Mags being poisoned all alone

Their deaths haunt my dreams, too many Trinkets to remind me

Of the horror of the games and all the blood that was spilled by me

Peeta and Gale don’t realise what a monster lies beneath the Glimmer

Of an actual human, the only one who knows me is dead. I’m a Cinna

Robin Hood
I forgot I defend the undefended, and I go Scarlet for it

The redneck mining district just has to be the poorest

You have too many explosions, but food only in dreams

Accept what my Merry Men give or be torn at the Seams

Katniss Everdeen
Me and Gale keep ours fed whilst living on a Thread

In the woods every day to hunt for our bread

So you offering us charity is just you trying to diss us

If you try to burn us then Sherwood will burn with us

 Who won? Katniss Everdeen Robin Hood 