User blog:UnstableIsotope42/Scientific Rap Battles - S1E1 - Aristotle vs Antoine Lavoisier

What's up everyone? It's been a while since I released my latest battle, and it wasn't my best work. I've decided to start from a blank slate with reusing an old concept of mine: science rap battles. I've re-branded and fancied everything up to make it a little more sleek. Hopefully I can go far with this series and not dump it after the first battle. I've got some really good battles in mind and a whole lot of people I'd love to put in but no idea who to pit against. (See Wegener; Goodall).

As for this battle, the connection's a bit hazy, I admit. This is actually a mutated version of my planned season finale battle which had Aristotle go up against "the Real Elements", which was Mendeleev and a bunch of other chemists who represented different classical elements. If I remember correctly, I only had Sir William Ramsay as Air (noble gases) and Antoine Lavoisier as Fire (hydrogen, combustion). For whatever reason, I thought that Aristotle would be fun to have battle Lavoisier, even though Lavoisier was decidedly a chemist and Aristotle touched about every field of natural science. I think the battle works really good, and I'm glad to share it with you all! I'm also just now realizing that this a bad time to upload this with the tourney kicking off and everything.

Sidenote: I may make a Rap Meanings, but I have no idea where to put it.

Battle
(Aristotle's verses are in maroon and Lavoisier's verses are in khaki .)

BEAT: http://www.shadowville.com/124254/genres/gangsta-beats/knock-you-out (Aristotle's verse starts at 0:12)

SCIENTIFIC RAP BATTLES!



VERSUS



BEGIN!

Aristotle:
Tell me this, chemist, you want to play with a polymath?

“For the public good” despite being a pompous plutocrat!

Your government was perverted, down to the institution.

And so, your Final Cause must be a second execution!

I’m a famous philosopher, botanist to geologist,

Musician, physicist, politician, and zoologist!

With all of this, man, I handcrafted the West,

You named two elements, can’t compete with the best!

Total brimstone to the mic, because my raps get hotter,

When whackin’ the black market falls down to ash and water.

Best be prepared for a slaughter, when Aristotle comes a-knockin’,

Because the only thing that’s worse is a blade through the noggin.

Antoine Lavoisier:
As a nobleman of France, I cannot just take a diss,

Especially spit from the lips of a towel-wrapped misogynist!

You’re barely an animal, your Soul’s nowhere rational.

My chemical work was radical, your work is quite laughable!

I’ll outpass you in a classroom, schooled like the Great.

So poison, I’ll send you back to your mother’s estate!

Take the wind from your sails; phlogiston from your fire,

When I send you up higher than my name upon a spire.

Aristotle:
You’re on the Eiffel Tower? My name’s up in a crater!

I can do more for science just by putting pen to paper.

Face the qualitative facts: you ruled poorly through life,

Your tobacco was more unadulterated than your wife!

Antoine Lavoisier:
Poor leader? Need I quote your own war theory you gave!

You’re a war-mongering baboon who’s itching for a slave!

Nowadays, Aristotle, you’re a mockery of philosophy.

You’re a Plato wannabe who minors in biology.

Aristotle:
You started a revolution, but died by the next.

Got more knowledge in my brain than any of your text!

I’m the form, you’re the matter, sadly there’s no between,

For the most worthless member to be in the Ancien Régime.

Antoine Lavoisier:
My raps are even hotter than the powder I supplied!

After you went under fire, you exiled and died.

I conquer like Alexander, I’m sure you’ll still protest.

My works went global, you couldn’t get out of the West.

Better biologist, too: I’ll out-class you in any genus.

I’m tearing down your works like I’m Sulla. Felix.

You think you’re ironclad? If so, I’m an oxidant.

I’ll end you like my experiments: cut off the oxygen.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?



SCIENTIFIC RAP BATTLES! (The logo catches fire or something)

Who Won? Aristotle Antoine Lavoisier

(Remind me to make a navbox later on.)