User blog:Amontgomery1432/Ron Jeremy vs NormalPornForNormalPeople.com. Epic Rap Battles: Horror vs Anything Season 1

I came...Back huehuehuehue- Alright, that's enough awful puns for one day lol. Except for one in the actual battle, but that's besides the point. Today's matchup is one for the ladies...Or the gentlemen...If you're into that. Welcome back to Epic Rap Battles: Horror vs Anything! I've returned after weeks upon weeks of absence, which I apologize for. School was overwhelming me. Now that summer is here, I'll have more time for these battles. My birthday was yesterday. I'm  four seventeen now. And, to celebrate, here's a battle about dicks. It's Ron Jeremy, the pornstar with the huge schlong, against NormalPornForNormalPeople.com, a totally normal porn website (it's actually not normal), in order to see which porn thing is better: The actor or the website. Special thanks to Shovel Night for playing NormalPorn and for supplying the "pornhub on crack" joke. He did a stellar job! I wrote for Ron Jeremy. Because dicks. Until I figure out how professional navboxes work, I'll have to stick to what I got. I'm sorry about that. So, without further adieu, here's the battle that will  fucking hopefully make up for my absence. And, yes. Swearing will become more present in this series, but only if necessary. Or if fun. Fuck, I keep fucking typing "Jon Reremy"! kgo2dacst

Cast:
EpicLLOYD as Ron Jeremy

A computer, I guess as NormalPornForNormalPeople.com (voice)

Nobody as NormalPornForNormalPeople.com  (video) because can you imagine how ridiculous a man cosplaying as a computer would look?

The Battle:
EPIC RAP BATTLES: HORROR VS ANYTHING!!

RON JEREMY!!

VERSUS!!

NORMALPORNFORNORMALPEOPLE.COM!!

BEGIN!!

Ron Jeremy:
Excuse me, I'm here for the porn! Oh, God, never mind!

Whoever watches this ain't NormalPeople of any kind!

You'd have to be extremely lonely to even think to fap to this

Fifty Shades of Fucked Up "deep web" putrid filth!

You're just a scam email that belongs in my spam folder

Because your vids have more kinks than fucking IKEA furniture!

I'm surprised that your site has any visitors ever

When literally anything else on the internet is better!

NormalPornForNormalPeople.com:
Welcome! You may want to pass on this particular website

If you don't, then we will keep you lickedclean.avi

Once you started, we could tell that you would be pretty tonguetied

We thought you would be perfect to play the next obese mime!

You One-Eyed Monster! You thought you could get fame by meeting Guns N' Roses

But, once you lose to us, all of your verses will have been useless

You star in pornography but you only have one kid

Been in the background of great films, but your career's still shit!

Ron Jeremy:
You're labeled as a CreepyPasta yet you don't scare, man

LickedClean? Your whole website needs a repairman!

I'm actually respectable, while you're just pornhub on crack

So why don't you fuck off and don't ever cum back?

NormalPornForNormalPeople.com:
You must be our missing chimpanzee who gobbled up our little guest

We're Finishing The Game while you star in Homo Erectus

Send as many emails as you like, this will be our only reply:

Be ready for our next video: Ronnyfuckedup.avi!

Outro Announcer:
WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

EPIC RAP BATTLES - (aggressive sexual noises) Um, what are you doing? Um, nothing! Um...Okay...HORROR VS ANYTHING!!

Hint Decoding:
In case you didn't pick up on the sophisticated nuances of that bit, Ron was flogging his log. Alright, this is Hint Decoding, a bit I definitely didn't steal from other users, where...You get the idea.

Eyeless Jack vs Laughing Jack: One of the rappers present in that battle was Richard Van Bruen, the man who supposedly founded NormalPornForNormalPeople.com

Bart Baker's Wrecking Ball Parody: One of the lines sung in that song is "Excuse me, I'm here for the porn". It is sung by none other than Ron Jeremy

Fifty Shades of Grey: Really kinky porn. That's really all that is. And it connects to NormalPornForNormalPeople.com because of really kinky porn.

Hint to Next Battle:




This one is also a story battle lelel