User blog:Dark Cyan/Cyan's Birthday Battles Of Literature 21: D.H. Lawrence vs E.M. Forster (It's my Birthday special!)

Hello, everyone. And welcome back to Cyan's Rap Battles of Literature!

It's my 23rd birthday today, so to celebrate, here's a really, really short battle nobody but me wants! Yay!

I had a cool birthday, even though I was at work for most of it. Going out for a meal later tho, so that'll be nice.

This battle pits real life friends/fallen out friends D.H. Lawrence and E.M. Forster. There's not really a connection that can be summed up without a large essay about their shared themes of sexual daring or some shit like that, but I like this battle idea for some reason. Not enough to have attempted a proper battle with it, but...yeah.

(Also, no cover this time because I don't have my PC, or enough time to make one.)

Enjoy!

(Last CRBoL's Hints explained: "As I look out from my window, I see a Dehli Aisle" was a riddle that referenced E.M. Forster's most famous books 'A Room With A View' and 'A assage To India'. "The Lady's got a lover, my boy's got a lover, women have lovers, everybody has lovers!" Is the same deal but for the books "Lady Chatterley's Lover", "Sons And Lovers" and "Women In Love" by D. H. Lawrence.)

Beat: Syko's Orchestra

D. H. Lawrence
(starts at 0:22)

So here we are, Ed. Where Angels Fear To Tread

I’ll shred your plain bread books so hard, you’ll end up dead

But not from a stroke this time, unless it’s a stroke of my pen

Against paper to create works brought up again and again!

That sexuality of yours is something you need to fix

Even though your only act upon it was writing Maurice

You need to get fucking laid! Oh, was that too obscene?

You like men, but your books are the gayest thing I’ve ever seen

E. M. Forster
(starts at 0:)

First off, you better thank me for making people like you

(sigh) I just pick the worst ungrateful shits to be nice to

I changed the public’s perception of your works on it’s head

Maybe I should have joined in with the haters instead

But I stick to my words. You definitely have a great imagination if you think you’ll win

With your racy romances that I’ll knock off their pedestal into a bargain bin

It surely takes a genius to name an Australian novel “Kangaroo”

And the readers got tired of gay jokes after Wilde vs Stoker 2

Oscar Wilde
(starts at )

Did somebody Say my name? Because I have rhymes in reserve!

Two battles weren't enough to give me the attention I deserve!

I'm Oscar Wilde! The immortal talent, truly divine!

You're looking at the greatest playwright of all time!

Sophocles
Yeah, right! You're looking at the motherfucker who just beat Shakespeare!

If I'm being perfectly Earnest, get your pompous ass outta here!

I wouldn't indulge your ego by buying at ticket if you payed me Drachma!

Because you Victorian British authors don't know the meaning of drama!

Charles Dickens
O, please! Like a Greek would ever refuse a payment!

When it comes to the king of timeless fiction, you are not even a claimant!

Because that's my title, and long live my reign!

The only tragedy here is that I'll never be in this series again!

WHO WON? D.H. Lawrence E.M. Forster Oscar Wilde Sophocles Charles Dickens

Hints For The Next CRBoL:
Hint 1: Link Neal's Cipher

Hint 2: I think I remember the film