User blog:Bobdave/Eelektross vs Lanturn. Rap Battles of the Pokédex Season 1

Hello again, I don't take long to write these at all. At this rate, Season One will end by April next year. Awesome. But anyway, this battle is a short-ish one because these Pokémon aren't particulary significant in the grand scheme of Pokémon but I still hope that there's some quality over quantity in this. We have the Light Pokémon Lanturn who lures in prey with its glowing orb of death and then devours the poor sod whole versus the... umm... EleFish Pokémon (what the fuck's an EleFish?) Eelektross, a predator who latches onto its prey and shocks it with electricity in a battle of electric fish of prey (seriously? EleFish?). But yeah, battle-y time.

Beat - Extermination by Tha Venom Musik (note: speed up to 1.25 using the gear icon on the taskbar)

Announcer
RAP BATTLES OF THE POKÉDEX



VS!



BEGIN!

Lanturn:
​Okay, let's choose, what's Lanturn gonna use?

 I'd ask you your choice but you don't learn any moves

 Alright, time to fight the final form of Tynamo

 You aren't even a Water-type so why the hell you tryna flow?

 I don't give a toss what Eelektross drops

 You're about to get rekt by the depths' hotshot

 Gonna rep the ocean, I've been set in motion

 A sea-snake'll get wet when I get to flowin'

Eelektross:
Try to fight me? You're just a light from the sea

My rhymes are so sick that my shiny is green

Come in gunnin' with a Zap Cannon, think you can handle this?

I'll use these hands I've evolved to strangle an anglerfish

<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US" style="color:#31849B;mso-themecolor:accent5; mso-themeshade:191;mso-ansi-language:EN-US">I'm spitting and slithering with a tsunami's powers

<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US" style="color:#31849B;mso-themecolor:accent5; mso-themeshade:191;mso-ansi-language:EN-US">Think you'll win? You're more of a sucker than my mouth is

<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US" style="color:#31849B;mso-themecolor:accent5; mso-themeshade:191;mso-ansi-language:EN-US">I'll Headbutt your ass sky-high when I levitate

<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US" style="color:#31849B;mso-themecolor:accent5; mso-themeshade:191;mso-ansi-language:EN-US">Prepare for when a lamprey slams it's lamp-headed prey

<span style="color:rgb(255,192,0);">Lanturn:
<span style="color:rgb(255,192,0);">Ohm my God, watt are you saying? It hertz that you're so stupid

<p class="MsoNormal"> Ion Deluge? More like Ion Deluded

<p class="MsoNormal"> Keep your eye on my light while I swallow you whole

<p class="MsoNormal"> You hear the cheers? That's cuz a footballfish just scored a goal

<span style="color:rgb(49,132,155);">Eelektross:
<span style="color:rgb(49,132,155);">Eat shit, you can't beat me, this eel has no weakness

<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US" style="color:#31849B;mso-themecolor:accent5; mso-themeshade:191;mso-ansi-language:EN-US">Thunderbolt you via bioelectrogenesis

<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US" style="color:#31849B;mso-themecolor:accent5; mso-themeshade:191;mso-ansi-language:EN-US">I evolve from leeches with more threatening features

<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US" style="color:#31849B;mso-themecolor:accent5; mso-themeshade:191;mso-ansi-language:EN-US">Call this a verbal oil spill, this creepy fish is defeated

Announcer
WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

RAP (Eelektross bites into the logo)

AHH!

BATTLES (Lanturn chases the logo offscreen)

OF THE POKÉDEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEX