User blog:ShoopDaKev/Apologies, Explanations, and Hugs For All

Oh, hello Beatrice. I am officially calling this my most important blog ever, so y'all better be reading and junk. As you all know, I haven't been myself lately. I'm taking the time out of my non-existing schedule to explain my oddness, and lack of Shoopness. Let's take a walk down memory lane, also known as last weekend. So ye, get your hankies ready, because it's time for some crazy talk.

To put it simply, I couldn't get into Doctor Who. I've seen 2 episodes, and I secretly wish I was a Whovian. It seems like a really awesome show, and I wish I could get into the conversations, but the show could never keep my interests. I found it odd that a blog about the aniversery of the show was so well recieved. Yes, I have my fair share of useless blogs, and heck, Coder's blog wasn't even useless. I was just confused, and I said that Doctor Who sucks, but really, it doesn't. I'm just not a fan, and I thought it was going to be a tad bit funny. I didn't expect a negative response, but I didn't expect it to be peaches and roses either. To be honest, while I regret every second of it, I still thought the avatar was funny. Would I do it again? No, of course not. But that's in the past, and I am deeply sorry if it offended you. I guess, I didn't realize it would personally offend you, since it's a TV show. I honestly can't remember freaking out when someone insults something I like. If I did, I was certainly joking, but that's very hard to tell online.

It got worse as the day went on, but I never tried to make it that way. I was so worried that I wouldn't piss the others off, I pissed the others off in the process. But alas, it was not a good night and I had an odd feeling I should disable my account. Yes, that's a freaking stupid idea, since I have no reason to, but at that moment, it felt like the only thing I could do. I felt like maybe this wiki took too much time from me, and that maybe I finally realized that it wasn't worth it. Luckily, it was, but I wasn't sure at the time. There was a lot more to it, but I'd rather not share those reasons because I'd rather not piss anyone else off.

As good old Harvey Dent would say, the night is darkest right before the dawn. While on a happier note, the dawn is here now, this moment was certainly, the darkest. My mind was scattered, and I had no idea what to do, I was moping and being stupid all day. I should have just stayed off until I felt better, but I was ignorant and never quite dubstepped out of the house at the right time. I figured I would take a break, so I asked Meat to demote me. Let's venture on to the next paragraph so I can explain.

I'll say it right now, I felt like I was addicted. Like I needed to be here, and that no matter what, I would feel the need to stay. I thought that maybe if I told people I was leaving, that I could convince myself to leave. I also asked Meat to demote me because I thought it would take the weight off my shoulders. Which luckily, it did. I obviously want my star back, but I'll wait pleasently until that day. But then, something hit me last night. Say I can't bring myself to leave, what's wrong with that? It's not like this wiki is drugs, beer, or even something as tame as Potato Chips. As long as I can do other stuff and function as a human being, I think going on a website isn't a horrible thing to do. I've started writing a comic book, so it can keep me busy when I'm bored.

This long blog comes to a close with a few final things to get off my mind. If it seemed like I made myself the victim in this blog, I hope that's not what you saw. I actually tried to be as hard on myself as possible, while still being normal in the process. Last thing, I'd like to apologize for everything I've done recently, including making you read this long blog. So, that last part of the title comes true, as I give hugs to all of you who read. You guys are awesome, and I could never truly leave forever. So, thank you for everything, once again, including reading this long blog.