User blog:Doctor Mysterio/Food Battle I: Cave vs Bobdave!

(We open up to a beautiful looking house where Cave is sitting on a couch when he pulls something out of a takeout bag)

Cave: Ah vegetable egg rolls, my favorite!

(Bobdave comes into the scene carrying a singular Pringle)

Bob: HA!! If you think vegetable egg rolls are good, then you have no tastebuds bub!

Cave: (deadpan) Everybody has tastebuds smarty pants

Bob: Then you uh... Have bad tastebuds! Yeah take that!

Cave: Smooth... Anyway you must be a nincompoop if you think Pringles are good!

Bob: No! A SINGULAR Pringle, there's a difference!

Cave: Well if you think your stupid Pringle can be better than my Vegetable Egg Roll... then you're going down Titty Twister!!!

(Food Battle has Begun!)

(We cut to two glaring users sitting at a table with a large catalog and their respective foods)

Bob: Alright, how about a cellphone?

(Bob is using his Pringle to get a call but is unsuccessful)

Bob: Argh! Stupid Pringle!!

(FAIL)

(Cave's turn)

(Cave is trying to get a call on his egg roll until...)

Person on phone: Hello?

Cave: Yeah!

(WIN!)

Person on phone: Press one for oral noises and press...

Cave: Gah!

(Back at table)

Cave: How about a baseball?

Bob: Hell Yeah!

(Bob is at a baseball field and is dressed in a pitcher outfit)

Bob: Don't fail me now Pringle!

(He throws at the player and it smashes into bits)

Bob: SHIT!

(FAIL)

(Cave's turn)

Cave: and here we go!

(Cave throws the egg roll and it hits the bat! then ricochets into his kiwis)

Cave: (Screams so loud that...)

(Australia at a small cafe)

Legion: Did you here something Jella?

Jella: Nope (sips coffee)

(FAIL)

(Back at Table)

Bob: How about a delicious sandwich?

Cave: Yeah!

(Cut to cave's kitchen)

Cave: Vegetable Egg roll sandwich here I come!

(Cave bites into it and he eats it in two bites)

Cave: It works!

(WIN)

(Bob puts a Pringle between two slices of bread)

Bob: Yummy!

(Bob bites it and eats it all)

Bob: Point for me!

(WIN)

(Bob's belly rumbles)

Bob: Ogh, that didn't settle well..

(Back at table)

Cave: Hmm maybe a- where are you?

(Toilet flushes)

Bob: okay how about a gun?

(Cut to Bob)

Bob: Okay Pringle, be a gun!

(it suddenly turns into a small handgun)

Bob: Yaahoo!

(WIN, Don't ask)

Cave: Okay let's do this!

(Like Bob, his food turns into a gun)

Cave: Yeah!

(WIN)

(It accidentally fires at a jogger that looks like Flats)

Cave: Fuck I'm outta here!

(Back at table)

Cave: O.K. Drumsticks!

(Cut to basement where Bob is playing the drums with his Pringle)

Bob: Ha! This is so damn easy!

(WIN, Seriously don't fucking question it)

(Cave is now playing drums)

Cave: Vegetable Egg Roll drumsticks are so awesome!

(Keith Moon suddenly comes in)

Keith: Get out Cave

Cave: Aren't you dead?

Keith: GIT OUT OF MY GODDAMN BASEMENT!

(Cut to table with Cave having a drumstick rammed in his ear)

Bob: Uh Cave...

Cave: Shaddup, how about a helicopter?

(Cut to Bob with his Pringle)

Bob: Helicopter here we go!

(It suddenly turns into a giant Pringle helicopter and he flies away cheerfully)

Cave: Oh no you don't!!

(Cave's egg roll turns into a helicopter and the two users face off)

Cave: Shall we?

Bob: Damn right!

(They face off with attached guns to their helicopters as they load them...)

To be continued!!!

Who won? Cave Bob