User blog:Mystical Trixter/Tim Allen vs Tom Hanks; Epic Rap Battles of Firebrand

This was on my old leaving blog, but Imma repost it because I liked this battle and it deserves it.

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF FIREBRAND

TOM HANKS

VS

TIM ALLEN!!!

BEGIN!

Tim Allen:
Oh Happy Days! I get to give you an ass handing

By the end of this battle I will be the Last Man Standing

You can't step to me, Tommy, because I'm in A League of My Own

I am Santa Claus, You're just on an island letting your beard get overgrown

My rhymes will Buzz in your ears, why don't you go play with your Woody,

Everytime we said goodbye recording Toy Story was when I said "Goodie"

Call me The Fonz, because I'll beat this geezer to retirement

Because let's face it; taking you out would be a Home Improvement

Tom Hanks:
I think I'll Cast Away those week rhymes and come in for the kill

I Know You're Alone, And I'm way above you, call me Jim Lovell.

When it comes to money I'm a whole Green Mile ahead of Timmy here,

Catch me if you can! You'd need help to match me, any Volunteers?

The REAL Home Improvement here is tossing out this Small Fry

Why do you think you're something when I've made over 8.5 Million Worldwide?

Do you think Lightning McQueen can outrace the Polar Express?

My approval rate is as high as you, with that 650 grams of cocaine you posess!

Tim Allen:
(Becomes Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor)

It's Tool Time to fix this wreck named Tom

I'll kick your ass to infinity... and beyond!

Your electric car doesn't save the enviroment when the driver is trash

I believe your parents divorced because you were a pain in the ass.

Did your awkwardness at high school give you trauma?

Even so I bet it's not as bad as your love of Obama.

Here's a Story for the kids, Tom Hanks is nothing but a Toy!

I'm as quick as McQueen, while your as slow as your asteroid!

Tom Hanks:
(Becomes Forrest Gump)

My mom always told me not to be rude to anyone, even the meaner people

But I think I can make an exception so you can see your friends at the hospital

I think your wife was right when she called you pathetic all those times

I'm a champ at Ping-Pong, Running, Football and now one at rhymes

If you think I'm an idiot, well stupid is as stupid does, another thing my mom said

She also said Life is like a box of chocolates, and that quote is now widespread

I got through my Leg Braces and Vietnam, and now I'm through with you

Not to be rude, sir but you really are a Tool, Man, and you know it's true.

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!!!

EPIC RAP BATTLE OF FIREBRAND!

Who won

Tom Hanks

Tim Allen