User blog:JKGame/Monika vs Goro Akechi: Epic Rap Battles of the Universe

(Spoilers for Doki Doki Literature Club and Persona 5. Even the connection between these two are a spoiler.)

Welcome again to a new installment of Epic Rap Battles of the Universe.

We're once again diving into the world of Persona 5 with this battle. I've wanted to use Akechi for some time and he almost faced Light Yagami. However, I wanted to use someone else instead, and this one interested me the most.

Let's get this battle started!

"President of the Literature Club from Doki Doki Literature Club, Monika, and ace detective and former Phantom Thief from the video game Persona 5, Goro Akechi, battle each other to see who's the superior powerful killer driven out of a desire to be loved."

Battle
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF THE UNIVERSE!!!

MONIKA!

VS!

GORO AKECHI!!!

BEGIN!

Monika:
So you're the ace detective! To be honest, I'm underwhelmed

Considering that the only cases you've solved are ones you caused yourself!

Oh, you were the traitor of your group? Boy, totally didn't see that coming!

Even Shaymalan has better twists than whatever you were hiding in your sleeve!

In a world of infinite choices, you made nothing but mistake after mistake!

Here's a tip of the day: maybe don't try getting exposed by talking about pancakes!

I'm a poetry master, Akechi! Got flow like a dark puddle of ink!

For a detective, you sure didn't see through the plans of Shido and the Thieves!

Goro Akechi:
That was the best you can spit? Heh, how pitiful. I expected better.

Especially from someone who prides herself in being proficient in literature!

You're lucky I have time to serve you. I've got TV appearances coming every minute

A world without this waste of data: that's the future I like to imagine!

You're just standing around talking while I'm out serving justice!

And I bet your creator's next game will be released before you even win!

You're a vegetarian? That explains the lack of meat in your verse!

So go ahead and do your reality bending! I've already been through worse!

Monika:
You're just an attention wh*re. That for sure is clear!

And your dad somehow beats Natsuki's for worst father of the year!

With your hair and mannerisms, who do you think you are, Light Yagami?

You're no successor to Naoto! More like the second coming of Adachi!

Goro Akechi:
And what makes you superior? You're no different than me!

An utter disgrace to the world who's always sad and lonely!

At least I'm a celebrity, dammit! You're just some worthless piece of trash

Who only stayed relevant all because of RelaxAlax-

(Suddenly, both Akechi is transported to Monika's room and finds himself sitting in front of her.)

Goro Akechi:
What the-

Monika:
Speaking of relax, that's something I suggest you do right now.

'Cause soon, you'd become a victim to your own mental shutdowns

Driving people insane and killing them off? What's up with that?

What, was it just to be called a good boy from your abusive dad?

Goro Akechi:
Shut up, shut up, shut up! You're just being a hypocrite! Why bother?!

Been flanderizing your friends and then have them go out like my mother!

Now I know why you left the debate club! You can't argue for sh*t!

Here, I'll show you the ropes! You can play the role of Sayori!

Monika:
Gee, I couldn't make you more unlikeable than you already are!

That was pretty quick. You went psychotic in only a few bars!

Goro Akechi:
I'll make your life more of a living hell than when players quit your game!

Face Your Reality: your Happy End's as nonexistant as your gameplay!

Monika:
Crow, you're just acting like some little kid who's throwing a fit!

Gotta say, though, you had a sad end, didn't even appear in the credits!

To both Shido and that god, you're nothing but a puppet!

Wish I battled Joker instead, even if he's like Yuri: shy and quiet.

I'm pretty Confidant that I'll be leaving this Agent 47 clone beat!

And have a brand-new ending with Just Monika and no Akechi!

You have Loki as your real Persona, but you don't have half of his wit!

Akechi-kun, I enjoyed this Talk, but now I'll leave your file deleted!

Goro Akechi:
What?! Damn you! If you're going to go and kill me

Then I should take care of you, too! You're coming with me!

Despite one of poem's titles, no one will be here to save you!

Guess I finally found someone who will always be inferior!

Something that turns out to be scary: haven't we seen this already?

You haven't seen my true power! I destroy anyone who opposes me-

(Monika quickly deletes Akechi's files and he slowlys starts to fade.)

Goro Akechi:
Agh! Alright, you asked for it! I'll put you out of your misery!

(Akechi pulls out a gun and points it towards Monika's head.)

Sayo-nara. Case closed. This is how you end, you'll stop moving...

(Monika panics and hopes that he is deleted before he shoots. However, Akechi pulls the trigger and Monika falls dead. Akechi laughs manaically before...)

> _

Akechi.chr deleted successfully.

...Who won?

Who's next?

You decide.

Epic...RAP BATTLES-

(The logo then glitches and then turns to black.)

Poll
Who won? Monika Goro Akechi