User blog:Dark Cyan/CyGIR Rap Battles 4: The Three Stooges vs Eddsworld

Hello, everyone. And welcome to CyGIR Rap Battles!

Battle four! A reason to celebrate, as it's been almost a month since the last one! And unlike the last one, we both did our fair share of the work.

This was a very fun battle to make, as we're both massive Eddsworld fans (I've personally been a fan since 2005) and the Stoogges are, well, they're the Stooges. Timeless comedy legends that will never not be funny.

This battle pits American 1930's comic trio The Three Stooges against British 2000's animated comic Trio Eddsworld to see who is supreme. Enjoy!

(Last week's hints explained: "Why, I oughtta go get a coke and some bacon!" Simple. "Why, I ougtta!" is one of the Stooges most iconic catchphrases, and coke and bacon is a combination heavily associated with Eddsworld.)

Beat: First Step

Battle=

The Three Stooges
(Larry is light grey, Curly is grey, Moe is dark grey )

(starts at 0:11)

Okay, guys. Any minute now, our opponents are gonna arrive

Who are they? Only Monty Python are worthy enough to even try

Wait, there’s a Jehova’s Witness knocking at the door! Just ignore em ya, Knucklehead!

We were waiting for our British equals, and you’re not them! You want a scuffle, Edd?

What a fall from grace! These are New Grounds! We hit Rock Bottom!

Whatsa matter wit’ you? Like your Kickstarter promises, your Legacy’s been forgotten!

Ok, Curly. Dress up as a girl and distract the dumb one. Ooh! Which one, Moe?

The ginger one. Soitenly! I oughtta have been more specific, though

Eddsworld
(Edd is green, Tom is blue, Matt is purple )

(starts at 0:32)

Oh, hello, beautiful! Can I buy you a drink? What’s your name?

Matt, that’s not a girl. Are you sure? Yes! Oh, that’s a shame...

Aaaanyway...We came here to set the record straight!

So let the superior comic trio get all up in your Space!

Your raps are more wooden than your actoring! *knock* You said it, Shoe!

Wait, these aren’t Laurel and Hardy! I’ve been Booby Duped!

We’re bacon you with disses like Breakfast! Charlie Chaplin called

He says your Vaudeville act falls flat! Just like Niagara Falls!

Moe Howard
(starts at 0:53)

Why, I oughtta! You sold us shorter than spare copies of Toaster Brains!

Made your own series for nine years but still only famous for “I Like Trains”!

A wise guy, eh? This won’t be the second ‘battle’ you’ve lost! Ouch!

I’ve stopped Edd’s World from spinning, now you other boobs, spread out!

Larry Fine
Tom, you’re about to Cakebomb like a shit skit joke!

I gotta deal with this Dark Squidge. You see what I do to get paid, folks?

Just scrap your attempts at Social Justice and go back to helping those creepy puppets!

We’re legends high atop the summit while you plummet!

Horse Face
I love it!

Curly Howard
Matt, you’re so vain...uh...nothing but the Mirror gets a look!

Uhh...you don’t have a soul, ginger! Nyuk nyuk nyuk!

You’re just a posh twat version of The Cat from Red Dwarf!

Well BARK BARK, bitch! Your show isn’t as good as Red Dwarf!

Woop woop woop woop woop woop woop woop!

Tom
(starts at 1:25)

Holy Crappy Comedians on a Crash Course! They’re Comedians? Pfft,Hardly

Since these jackASDF’s style was funnier written by The HUGGING Farrelys.

Things will NOT be Fine! Cause Tom spit’s absolutely Brilliant! Watch and learn.

Just keep your dignity intact! Or in fact, this child will receive yet another burn.

Edd
Jeez, those raps were bloody awful! And I thought I’VE seen Hell!

But when I up and split a Moses, all in all, I’m Pretty Swell!

Man, I flow just like Cola against this Dora lookin bloke!

Edd’s Mowing over Moe, and I’m ‘Moidering’ this joke!,/Span>

Matt
…….What? MATT, IT’S YOUR TURN! Uhhhhhhh...Please Stand By!

(Awkward pause as Matt scrolls through Curly’s wikipedia page)

Aha! Guys, why are we dissing this re-Torded guy? (Matt and Tom facepalm.)

I mean, he JUST came out the Har-grave, and He’s NOT looking Ridgewell.

Pffftt,these guys are just Burrito-Butt-sore! Pop goes the Weasel!

Intermission
(beat stops)

Wow, Matt. Thanks for ruining our whole verse.

Indudubly! (wtf)

Now what do we do?

Don’t worry, guys. I got this. There’s only one way to win a rap battle...A vodka powered microphone launcher!

That doesn’t look very safe…

(The launcher fires a mic prematurely, that hits Curly and knocks him through the window.)

Ohhhh no! Coily!

(Arriving in an old fashioned automobile a man steps out…..its Shemp!)

Step aside, Knuckleheads. I’ll handle this!

(Edd is hit by Shemp's pie in relation.)

This is….delicious... (Edd passes out.)

Toooooom! Who’s gonna finish the battle? We’re leaderless!

Do not worry Matt. What you need is some help…… (A familiar figure steps out of the shadows) From an old friend….

(new beat)

Wait…..who are you?

Shemp
(starts at 0:06)

I know who this guy is. He’s a communist Nor-dick!

You two, Hold that Ghost! And I’ll handle this Tord prick!

The heck, Sunshine n’ Lollipops? You stole our whole schtick!

Slapstick is our gig! Who do you think you are? A Larsson-ist?

For twelve years straight, your whole personality’s been ‘you like guns’

Every Eddisode you were in was more 'Dead' than 'Fun'

And that's one problem you can't fix with a chopper, rocket or knife!

High Tail it! Disappear just like you did in real life!

Fame's not for everyone, and Art Trouble is Serious

But to cut yourself off and go into hiding? Are you delirious?

I'll beat this Hentai freak through concrete and streets, Creep!

And put you 25ft under, so TAKE A SEAT!

Tord
(starts at 0:06)

AHHHHH, ZOMBEH ATTACK! Calm down dear friends, You’ll be fine

Although the fighting of these corpses IS just like old times….

But now Tord spits new rhymes! I’ll repent for all my crimes!

Then again...who needs friends when you’ve got Norse lines like mine?

May be Just a Bit Crazy? Oh BOY I’ve just started!

YOU should be the one to flee….but I love a Moving Target!

It’s Tord’s Adventure! Ruining four disgraces!

As he says Whatever! Give them REAL black faces!

Poor Shemp’s scared of puppies, water, airplanes and cars

Think what REAL fear the Red Leader gives him with these bars!

Ugh, this COULD be a Fake Shemp! I’d Spare not one of them, my friend!

Classic Stupid Tom! My Meaty lines will make his heart give out! The End!


 * -|Rap Meanings=

The Three Stooges
Okay, guys. Any minute now, our opponents are gonna arrive

(The three stooges are waiting for their opponents in this rap battle)

Who are they? Only Monty Python are worthy enough to even try

(They do not know who they are to face, though they speculate that it's Monty Python, a British comedy group comparable to the Stooges, as they are, to the Stooges, the only opponents who are worthy to face them.)

Wait, there’s a Jehova’s Witness knocking at the door! Just ignore em ya, Knucklehead!

(Jehova's witnesses are known for knocking on doors, and Tom from Eddsworld is a Jehova's Witness which was a joke referencing Thomas Ridgewell, his voice actor and Eddsworld writer/showrunner, also being a Jehova's Witness. Moe calls Curly a knucklehead, which was a common Three Stooges gag/catchphrase.)

We were waiting for our British equals, and you’re not them! You want a scuffle, Edd?

What a fall from grace! These are New Grounds! We hit Rock Bottom!

(The stooges first threaten Eddsworld with violence then lament at being matched with them. New Grounds is a reference to Newgrounds.com, where Eddsworld first started to get noticed, and Rock Bottom is the name of an Eddsworld episode.)

Whatsa matter wit’ you? Like your Kickstarter promises, your Legacy’s been forgotten!

("Whatsa matter wit' you?" is another catchphrase of Moe. Eddsworld Legacy was a kickstarter campaign meant to fund Eddsworld after the passing of Edd Gould, with the actual profits the show made going to cancer charities. The promised Kickstarter perks were not delivered on time. Even to this day there are still people waiting for their rewards.)

Ok, Curly. Dress up as a girl and distract the dumb one. Ooh! Which one, Moe?

The ginger one. Soitenly! I oughtta have been more specific, though

(Curly dressing in drag to further one of Moe's plans was a common Stooges gag. Curly asks which one Moe means by 'the dumb one', implying he thinks they're all dumb.)

Eddsworld
Oh, hello, beautiful! Can I buy you a drink? What’s your name?

Matt, that’s not a girl. Are you sure? Yes! Oh, that’s a shame...

(Matt has fallen for the disguise and attempts to hit on Curly, before Tom dissuades him. This is both a throwback to Curly in drag almost always fooling men in Three Stooges skits, and Matt being the vain dimwit of his group.)

Aaaanyway...We came here to set the record straight!

So let the superior comic trio get all up in your Space!

(This last line is a reference to Space Face, an Eddsworld episode)

Your raps are more wooden than your actoring! *knock* You said it, Shoe!

(Actoring is a term Tom Ridgewell uses to refer to the act of acting as you're acting as opposed to acting naturally, a mistake done by many ameteur actors and he's implying the Stooges were also guilty of it. The Shoe was a movie director in the Eddsworld episode Movie Makers)

Wait, these aren’t Laurel and Hardy! I’ve been Booby Duped!

(Matt confuses the Stooges for fellow comedy legends Laurel and Hardy. The Booby Dupes is the name of a Three Stooges film.)

We’re bacon you with disses like Breakfast! Charlie Chaplin called

(Bacon=baking pun. Breakfast is an Eddsworld episode. The Chaplin reference is actually also a reference to the '?Charlie Chaplin time traveler'. Look it up.)

He says your Vaudeville act falls flat! Just like Niagara Falls!

(In a common Stooges Vaudville skit, the phrase 'Niagara Falls' would trigger Moe to violence.)

Moe Howard
RAP MEANINGS COMING SOON

Larry Fine
RAP MEANINGS COMING SOON

Curly Howard
RAP MEANINGS COMING SOON

Tom
Holy Crappy Comedians on a Crash Course! (They’re Comedians?) Pfft,Hardly

(Tom uses his holy ___ on a ___ catchphrase to express how he thinks the stooges are spiraling down or a crash course in their career. Matt didn’t know they were comedians and asked conformation. Tom doesn’t think so because….)

Since these jackASDF’s style was funnier written by The HUGGING Farrelys.

(ASDF is a series Tom created. This is a play on Jackass, because eddisodes are pretty clean, using substitutes or cutting off swear words. Also, this theme continues because Ben, a charecter from Crash Zoom, Tom’s other series, says hugging instead of fucking. Tom thinks the jackass stooges were funnier written by the infamous fucking Farrley Brothers in there 2012 reboot movie. They aren’t credible comedians if even the Farrleys did better at comedy.)

Things will NOT be Fine! Cause Tom spit’s absolutely Brilliant! Watch and learn.

(Generic pun on Larry’s last name. Tom tells him that things aren’t okay. He spits brilliant because of his Tom’s Tales of Brilliance. He tells Larry to listen up…)

Just keep your dignity intact! Or in fact, this child will receive yet another burn.

''(One of Larry’s catchphrases was where’s your dignity? Tom suggests that Larry stop, in order to save his credibility. Otherwise, Tom will give a figurative (or literal??? Toms kinda trigger happy/slightly insane) burn to Larry. When Larry was a child, he burned himself with his father's acid which he used to test if gold was real or not)''

Edd
Jeez, those raps were bloody awful! And I thought I’VE seen Hell!

(Edd was not at all impressed by Moe’s lines against him, using british cuss word bloody. He had seen hell in Hello Hellhole, but Moe’s verse was way worse.)

But when I up and split a Moses, all in all, I’m Pretty Swell!

(Although he’s seen hell, when he splits Moe (full name Moses) LIKE Moses split the red sea, he over all feels pretty swell, Edd Goulds catchphrase of sorts.)

Man, I flow just like Cola against this Dora lookin bloke!

(Edd’s favorite drink ever is Cola, which is a liquid. It would be reasonable Cola has good flow, or rap flow. Edd has good smooth flow against Moe, who he compares his hair to that of Dora the explorers)

Edd’s Mowing over Moe, and I’m ‘Moidering’ this joke!

(Edd makes one of his classic puns, off Moe’s name saying he will mow him over and destroy him. He will also murder him, a classic Moe threat said in the way I wrote it. Edd could be mockingly saying it as if Moe’s way of saying it was stupid)

Matt
RAP MEANINGS COMING SOON

Shemp Howard
RAP MEANINGS COMING SOON

Tord
AHHHHH ZOMBEH ATTACK! Calm down dear friends, You’ll be fine

(Zombeh attack is a series of Eddisodes with zombies.Because the Stooges are all dead, and very old, Matt assumes it is another zombie experience. Tord reassures his friends that everything will be fine however…)

Although the fighting of these corpses IS just like old times….

(He does agree that fighting the Stooges reminds him of previous Zombeh Attacks. He directly quotes a line from The End part one where he menacingly replies to Edd’s idea that things were just like old times)

But now Tord spits new rhymes! I’ll repent for all my crimes!

(Tord states that he is back and different from those old times he mentioned. Between 25ft under the seat and The End he committed an unknown serious crime, but facing the stooges and helping his friends will repent for all those.)

Then again...who needs friends when you’ve got Norse lines like mine?

(Tord goes back on his previous line, contemplating that he doesn’t really need to repent for his wrongdoings when he has Norwegian or Norse lines. Norse is a synonym for nice on the wiki. A play on his quote from The End Part 2 when he says “What would I need friends for when I’ve got this?” (mech))

May be Just a Bit Crazy? Oh BOY I’ve just started!

(Tord fires back at Shemps accusations of him being insane saying if he thought he was insane then, he was just getting started. Referencing the eddisode short music video Just a bit Crazy.)

YOU should be the one to flee….but I love a Moving Target!

(Tord fires back at Shemp telling him to flee like his real life inspiration by telling him HE should be the ones that runs because Tord is dangerous. He implies he has a gun though and advises running may not be a good idea cause he loves moving targets, suggesting it would be more enjoyable for him. Moving Targets is an eddisode with Tord.)

It’s Tord’s Adventure! Ruining four disgraces!

(Tord implies this verse is an adventure for him and his quest to ruin for disgraces, the stooges, has begun. References Ruins and Tord’s Adventure both eddisodes with Tord)

As he says Whatever! Give them REAL black faces!

(Tord Implies that he could say whatever he wanted and he’d still give the stooges an extreme beating. The Stooges, early on, experimented with Blackface, especially Shemp. Tord will give them actual blackfaces instead of makeup. Tord says whatever is an eddisode)

Poor Shemp’s scared of puppies, water, airplanes and cars.

(Shemp was actually afraid of all these things)

Think what REAL fear the Red Leader gives him with these bars!

(Tord says, if all those things scare him, His bars, or raps, could provide true fear in Shemp because he argues he’s scarier than all those things. The Red Leader is an possible moniker for Tord.)

Ugh, this COULD be a Fake Shemp I’d Spare not ONE of them, my friend!

(Tom has natural conflict with Tord saying that even if his disses, this could be a false shemp, a technique in many stooge films to use actors who weren’t shemp to replace him and film it in creative ways to cover it up. Tord then implies there are actually multiple Shemps and he would not spare one of them. Spares is an Eddisode with Tord involving clones)

Classic Stupid Tom! My Meaty lines will make his heart give out! The End!

(To demean Tom, as part of their rivalry, he uses his nickname/catchphrase for him “Classic Stupid Tom” stating his idea is classically stupid of him, He implies there’s so much meat in his lines, Shemps heart will give out once again because he died of a heart attack. This will finish the battle, case closed as he references the two part eddisode and return of Tord and end of eddsworld “The End”)

WHO WON? The Three Stooges Eddsworld

Hints For The Next CRB:
There's no reason not to get naked if you can't hear people scream.