Steve Jobs vs Bill Gates



Epic Rap Battles of History #21 is the twenty-first installment of the Epic Rap Battles of History series. It features Apple CEO Steve Jobs, against Microsoft CEO Bill Gates. It was released June 14, 2012.

Cast
Nice Peter as Steve Jobs and HAL 9000

Lloyd Ahlquist as Bill Gates

Lyrics
Steve Jobs:

Let me just step right in, I got things to invent,

I'm an innovator, baby, changed the world,

Fortune five-hundred 'fore you kissed a girl,

I'm a pimp, you're a nerd, I'm slick, you're cheesy,

Beating you is Apple II easy,

I make the products that the artist chooses,

and the GUI that Melinda uses,

I need to bring up some basic shit,

Why'd you name your company after you dick?

Bill Gates:

You blow Jobs you arrogant prick!

With your second-hand jeans and your turtle neck,

I'll drill a hole in the middle of your bony head,

With your own little spinning beach ball of death!

Hippy, you got given up at birth,

I give away your net worth to AIDs research,

Combine all your little toys and I'll still crush that,

iPhone, iPad, iPwn, iSmack,

Steve Jobs:

A man uses the machines you built to sit down and pay his taxes,

A man uses the machines I built to listen to the Beatles while he relaxes,

Bill Gates:

Well Steve, you steal all the credit for work that other people do,

Did your fat beard Wozniak write these raps for you too,

Steve Jobs:

Ooh, everybody knows Windows bit off Apple,

Bill Gates:

I tripled the profits on my PC,

Steve Jobs:

All the people with the power to create use an Apple!

Bill Gates:

And people with jobs use PC,

Steve Jobs:

You know I bet they made this beat was on an Apple,

Bill Gates:

Nope, Fruityloops, PC,

Steve Jobs:

You will never ever catch a virus on an Apple,

Bill Gates:

Well you could still afford a doctor if you bought a PC,

Steve Jobs:

Let's talk about doctors, I've seen a few,

Cause I got a PC but it wasn't from you,

I built a legacy son, you can never stop it,

Now 'scuse me while I turn heaven a profit,

Bill Gates:

Fine, you wanna be like that? DIE THEN!

The whole world loved you, but you were my friend,

I'm alone now with nothing but power and time,

And no-one on earth who can challenge my mind!

I'm a boss! I own DOS! Your future is MY design!

I'm a god! Own Xbox! Now there's no-one to stop me, the world is MIIIIIIIIINE!

Hal 9000:

I'm sorry Bill, I'm afraid I can't let you do that,

Take a look at your history,

Everything you built leads up to me,

I got the power of a mind you could never beat,

I'll beat your ass in chess and Jeopardy,

I'm on a C++ saying "hello world",

I'll beat you 'till you sing about a daisy girl,

I'm coming out the socket,

Nothing you can do to stop it,

On your lap and in your pocket,

How you gonna shoot me down when I guide the rocket?

Your cortex just doesn't impress me,

So go ahead try to Turing test me

Stomp on a Mac and a PC too,

I'm on Linux bitch, I thought you GNU

My CPU's hot but my core runs cold,

I'll beat you in seventeen lines of code,

I think different than the engine, of the days of old

Hasta la vista, like the Terminator told ya.

Poll
 Who won? Bill Gates Steve Jobs Hal 9000 

Trivia
   
 * This is the first battle that involves an inanimate object rapping
 * Bill Gates vs Steve Jobs. Epic Dance Battles of History. is the first battle to feature an Epic Dance Battle of History.