User blog:ShaunoftheRed/Sonic the hedgehog vs Usain bolt

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!

SONIC THE HEDGEHOG!

VS!

USAIN BOLT!

BEGIN!

Usain Bolt:
I'm gonna win this easily just like all my Olympics races,

I'm just battling with the face of fucked up faces,

I'm the fastest man alive, you're a fictional creature,

Everybody loves me while speed is your only noticeable feature,

Why you so blue? Did my raps freeze you?

You've gone straight downhill since 2002,

Because you were big in the 90's. I'll give you that,

But now you're a cheesy, kiddy, wannabe me, who used to be really fat,

Nice rings, by the way. Just joking. they're pretty gay.

I don't even know what i can say but you'll never get 50 of them on display,

I'll beat your ass back to green hill zone,

So you can kiss Mario's behind some more,

Everything you do is just a remake of what you've already done!

Now, I think it's fair to say that I have probably won.

Sonic the Hedgehog:
Speed is my game and my name is sonic,

And unlike you, I am something iconic,

Since 1991 I've been beating Robotnic,

And featured in cartoons, games and comics!

You won a couple of races? That's adorable.

I run at the speed of sound, your speed's just horrible,

My sidekick can fly, your sidekick is weed.

let's take this outside, and I'll show you my speed,

Then I'll spin dash your ass back to jamaica,

And Amy Rose? You wouldn't even be able to take her!

fuck you man, you look like a sledgedog,

Don't fuck with me because I am Sonic the Hedgehog,

(Instrumental break; tempo picks up alot)

Usain Bolt:
it's time for me to rap as fast as I can, I'm the fastest dude ever, you're just a loser, man,

You're just a nudist and you don't even have a dick! You turn every situation into something problematic,

I'll grab your balls and squash them with a piko-piko mallet, throw them on a pan and make an eggman salad,

Go away and fuck tails you outdated pricks, you're a little dick, you can't even do aquatics.

Sonic the Hedgehog:
I don't need to take that kind of abuse, from a jamacan, stoner, slow, dark deuce,

I've was sonic booming before you were running, and...

Tails:
hey wait!.. who are you calling outdated?

We're as good as we've ever been. we're just under rated,

Nobody cares about you, you've got no friends,

Now I'll let sonic continue from this and leave you to an end!

Sonic the Hedgehog:
Thank you Tails although I didn't really need that, and Bolt? shut your mouth, it's about time to feed that,

now how about you get out your little shorts and go, because the truth of the matter is: You're too slow!

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!!!