User blog:Mystical Trixter/Fruit Punch vs. Tropical Punch. Trixter's Rap Battles of Something or Another

I don't really know what inspired me to write a battle between goddamn drinks, but here you go.

Intro
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY

TROPIcal... Punch?

Erm, VERSUS

FRU- Fruit Punch? Seriously, a battle between DRINKS!? That's it, I fucking quit.

Begin I guess. They don't pay me enough for this horseshit.

Fruit Punch
You'll be seeing red in your opticals when I'm done with you, Tropical

You're optional, not tasting me is impossible, improbable, I'm so topical!

I'm the life of the party, the one you see at every gathering,

The one with the supreme taste, the ones people would rather drink.

What the hell are you made of? A bunch of fruit nobody even cares about!

But I think I have some of those too, that was a poor diss without a doubt!,

I'll pour you down the drain and then I'll take your spot in the fridge,

Because I'm the tastiest fruit drink wanted by both adults and kids!

Tropical Punch
When it comes to satisfying drinkers you just don't meet the quota,

I think pretty much everybody out there would rather drink soda.

That may apply to me too, but hey, at least I'm not red and full of pulp!

And at least I'm not the drink that went and killed an entire fucking cult!

People might see you at a prom, but to your bowl do they ever go near?

No! They sneak out the back door and drink entire cases of beer!

I'm not really showing proof I'm the better drink, but I am, I promise!

One taste of me and your mouth will think that it's actually in the tropics!

Fruit Punch
In a Minute you Maid a verse that was worse than your Capri Sun drink,

You Tropi-can't-a rap, man, you should just go drain yourself I think!

I'd rather drink water than this yellow, piss colored load of bollocks.

I think the only time I've seen him get love is when he's made alcoholic!

Tropical Punch
Hey man, that gives me an edge over you, I am normally liked!

You seem confused and dazed buddy, you sure you weren't spiked?

Because that would be the only way that you ever have fans,

And now I'll Punch your Fruity face in! Wait... I DON'T HAVE HANDS!!!

Outro
Fuck you, I'm not doing this.

It's a fucking drink battle, are you serious?

Fuck off Trixter.

Oh and happy birthday to that horsefucker dude I guess.

Who won?

Fruit Punch

Tropical Punch