User blog:InfamousONLY/House vs. Hippocrates! Epic Rap Battles of History

Nice Peter as Gregory House

EpicLLOYD as Hippocrates of Cos

(House)

I will here today treat you hereby to death

Punched with my diagnoses - you'll soon be out of your breath!

'''Primum non nocere? ''' Who cares about your lines?

Your oath is a bullshit since everybody lies!

I’ll take my handy whiteboard and smack this medical aberration

Make you feel like med student on Anatomy examination

<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">Then I order MRI, some X-rays and lumbar punction

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">And diagnose your differentially as an antique obsolation!

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">I'm an amoral doctor with outstanding results

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">Your moral dilemmas bring only death accounts

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">You treat your patients well, while you just watch how they die?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">I guess it's highest time to call you Mr. Hypocrite!

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">(Hippocrates)

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">As for me, you don’t deserve to be called physician, Greg

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">Cause that title’s too high for a nasty junkie jerk

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">You don't treat people, House, you just only make a shot

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">Your patients do not die only due to unreal plot"

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">   From the Father of Medicine - what else have you expected?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL"> For over two millennia doctors used what I’ve invented

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">   You’re a shitty MC, and a crazy M.D.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">   For me, you are just a Medical Failure – M.F., see?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">Such famous diagnostician, but a lousy teacher

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">You couldn’t even teach Hugh Laurie, what could cause him a seizure!

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">Your episodes - so schematic, I’m just bored from déjà vu

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">When I want a solution, I skip to the minute thirty three”

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL"> But come closer now cause I see you’ve got pain problem

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL"> I'll treat your leg, House, but there won’t be drugs to solve it

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL"> (House)

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">Oh, shut up, you idiot, don’t flatter yourself, Greek

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">Single antibiotic saved more lifes than you did

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">Ethics won’t ever get your patient regenerated

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">Your faith in humanity is clearly overrated

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL;mso-bidi-font-weight:bold">You’re not even as humourous as you believed you’ve been

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">You’re just little phlegmatic with no jokes on the scene

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">You think you won the crowd with that speeches of yours?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">They’re forgotten, mine are fresh & burn everybody to toast

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">My worthness is impeccable, Cuddy would agree on that

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">For she turned down for me one hundred million dollars, mad?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">(Hippocrates)

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">Could you use, please, one phrase, that is really yours?

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">Cause from what I’ve heard, they’re just David Shore’s!

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">Back in my time, I had got the hundreds of followers with ease

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">While you’ve got only prostitutes and a Wilson’s disease!

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">Your story became bullshit as the seasons has progressed

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">You were in Mayfield and a jail, yet you’re still medically licensed

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">Now I think it's time to push my "Trittered" switch

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">To surely make you join with your Cutthroat Bitch!

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">You won't find your lupus here, wanna-be sociopath

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">Go play with your ball or bleed to death in your bath!

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">(House)

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">Oh yes. your balls.....

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";mso-ansi-language: EN-US;mso-fareast-language:PL">(House become silent and just walk out of the battle, leaving Hippocrates confused)

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal">Epic!

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:normal">