Talk:Epic Rap Battles of History 53/@comment-25070213-20150528173644/@comment-1197011-20150528182957

I made some :D

Houdini:

I'll bitch slap you like you were a fraudulent seer

For my next trick I shall make this fool disappear!

Houdini's opponent:

Did Lovecraft ghostwrite your lyrics? Cause they're putrid and fetid

I'll punch you in the stomach, leave you weak and decrepit!

Socrates:

I may be Greek, but my rhymes are colder than winter

I'll smash you like a rat, call you Master Splinter!

Confucius:

Rapping king Kong Qiu spitting proverbs aloud

Calling out Aristophanes to kick you to The Clouds

The city folks were wise when they vowed to execute ya

Stepping to fight me is going to be your cicuta!

Plato:

My wet rap sinks you like Atlantis! With Plato you don't meddle!

This is like my Cave Parable: all you see is my shadow!

Aristotle:

I'm the Academy OG, invented literary criticism

And when it comes to logic, people still use my system

Sun Tzu (or whoever is dissing Aristotle):

You're just a sexist fuck who knows no shit about aesthetics

Playing Obi-Wan to Alex, but you’re just peri-pathetic!

Your four elements thesis can't even explain astronomy

You're doing worse in this battle than in animal taxonomy!