User blog:Padsquad2010/Clay Kirby and Steve Arlin vs. Chris Young and Mat Latos - San Diego Padres Rap Battles of History no. 2

So, here's my third battle I've written. This one for the Padres series features two duos of pitchers who almost got a no-hitter for the Padres. The original Padres from the first season in 1969, Clay Kirby and Steve Arlin face off against more recent near no-hitter accomplishers, Chris Young and Mat Latos

CLAY KIRBY AND STEVE ARLIN

VS!!!

CHRIS YOUNG AND MAT LATOS!!!!

BEGIN!!!

Clay Kirby in Brown. Steve Arlin in Yellow. Chris Young in Blue. Mat Latos in Green. Both rappers at once in white.

Kirby and Arlin:

We're the originals! Winning ballgames since 1969

Yellow We've thrown the closest things to no-hitters in our short time

My first pitch was to Willie Mays, a hall of fame talent.

Young, you just pick fights with Derrek Lee, your real tests were absent.

You could only pitch in cavernous Petco Park

You went to DC and didn't even leave a mark.

So tall, supposedly can’t keep the ball on the ground

You're no Big Unit, different presence on the mound.

Now Latos, let's hear about these “maturity problems”

No scout wanted to sign some big, brash, stubborn goblin.

You didn't go to college long enough to see

Steve Arlin was college ball’s best prodigy;

Lighting up the zone even harder than you did.

I got a no-hitter at a higher level than this kid.

We founded this club, and kept things competent

Despite our team’s failures, we remained dominant

We enraptured the city and started a tradition.

Now, it's been ruined by these two’s ambition!

Young and Latos:

Ruined? Ha! More like got ‘em to the playoffs.

My perfection helped us be a team able to take off!

Maturity problems, you say? That's because I was right.

I won nearly all my first starts, yeah, I caused a blight.

Hey Kirby, you say things were tough for your career to start?

I started in the tiniest, quaintest, daintiest little ballpark.

Rangers Ballpark in Arlington would've wrecked you, too.

If that team existed, their bats wouldn't be Bamboo.

And Arlin, you poor little misguided soul.

College ball means nothing when you become a pro.

I almost had a no-no going against San Francisco.

Major divisional game, no small cross- country bowl.

We brought this team to new heights.

Your teams soared ‘neath the kites.

We filled this franchise with hope and glory.

Meanwhile these dudes sat forgetful like Dory.

Kirby and Arlin:

Forgetful? About what? Is it your failures as a pitcher?

Failed like Mat’s no-hitter to a lowly backup catcher

Yellow I’m now reminded of the fact that they weren't ever teammates!

Tells you their minds can't even pick rap partners straight.

You had the luxury of playing in a pitchers park.

San Diego Stadium may have required a bsarch

To understand all of its complicated intricacies

Forcing real skill to succeed there. Your trials are a fallacy

Young and Latos:

These guys need to go back to college ball, where they belong.

Steve’s a legend there, but as a pro a minute clog

They have no relevance to anybody now.

They were so promising, but their failures, just wow.

We've elongated our careers, Clay died of a heart attack.

Even old Willie Mays can attest to that.

I've been playing for a decade, and still going strong

Claiming you played better is inherently wrong.

Who Won? Clay Kirby and Steve Arlin Chris Young and Mat Latos

Who's Next?

I decided!