User blog:The Flatwoods Monster/Leprechaun vs Rumpelstiltskin - Epic Rap Battles of Horror Season 3 St. Patrick's Day Special

Hello everybody, and welcome to my St. Patricks Day Special! What's that you say? "Noah you fucking idiot St. Patrick's Day is next week"? Well fuck you I wanted to release this today <3 Nah-but-really, the next week is going to be pretty crazy for me so all-in-all it's much easier for me to release the battle today. Anyways, todays battle is pretty much a no-brainer, suggested to me by the omnipresent GIR and a WC, and it pits the lucky Irish monster, Leprechaun against the demon goblin who possess small babies, Rumpelstiltskin (not the fairy tale) to see who's the superior fable-based monster from Ireland. The next battle features one of my favorite writers, Joey of aching men, so look forward to that, though it won't be out until next week at the latest. After that, I have an off-season with special guest Lexi and after that, an on-season with special guest GIR. Then you have my boring writing for the rest of the battles. Anyways, this is a relatively short battle (no pun intended.) pun completely intended, because I didn't have much material for Rumpelstiltskin, but tis okay. Enjoy the battle, and Happy St. Patrick's Day.

Cast
EpicLLOYD as Leprechaun

Nice Peter as Rumpelstiltskin

Instrumental - Don't sue me Jason ;-;

Introduction
Announcer: (0:10)

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HORROR!

VS!



BEGIN!

The Battle
Leprechaun: (0:21)

Coming from his dungeon, Lubdan stepped up to a ball of grime,

I’m in my prime, pot of gold and dimes, rich like me rhymes!

I’d be askin' the Wish-Master before facing this bitch disaster,

So make like yer fable, dude! Rip your disabled ass in two!

Lookin’ like a shrew, for playing this trick, I’ll cut off ye dick

Slander you worse than the few critics who watched yer flick

I’m In The Hood! Golden flows, I’ll win this bout without a doubt,

You tried to step to a real monster and yer luck just ran out!

Rumpelstiltskin: (0:41)

The fairytale is over, and the nightmare begins today,

Defeating this poor man’s Chucky will just be Childs Play

Your rhymes are coming up short, with your little creeper face,

So give chase! Before I up and kick youback to space!

You freak-of-nature prick, cease and desist or I’ll end you quick

You’ve died ten times before, I’ll add another value to that list,

Wipe off that smile before you see something truly vile

I’m going wild, speak again and I’ll silence another whiny child

Leprechaun: (1:04)

Good God, laddie, you’re honestly still tryin’ to top this?

My raps are flawless! Your flow falls flatter than your box office!

You’re nothing without a host, you couldn’t cause me any harm,

I’m the horror king and you’re just jealous me raps are Lucky Charms!

Rumpelstiltskin: (1:14)

After so many movies, I Lepre-chan’t see how you’re scary,

Demon Goblin won’t be fearing an a thousand year old fairy!

Of fine gold lines, I spin, your existence is one of pure sin,

That nobody knew, for taking your win, my name is Rumpelstiltskin

Announcer: (1:25)

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HORROR!

Outro


Who won? Leprechaun Rumpelstiltskin

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