User blog:BasaltWolfED145RS/Lost Rap Battle: Ash Ketchum vs Charles Darwin

This was a rap battle I made after my battle with Nighthawk. After I beat him, I felt more confident in writing rap battles, so I made this. I didn't think this was that good, so I decided to just leave this, but now, I'm just gonna post this, cause I'm bored...enjoy!

Darwin:
I’m the father of Evolution, so listen up here boy,

You fight just to win, I’ll fight to destroy!

When you’re fighting in a battle, you just stand there all confused

3 of your pokemon left you, cause they didn’t want to be abused!

“Gotta Catch’em all” is all you ever say

You went out with 4 bitches who all thought you were gay

You’re not the Pokemon Master, you’re a complete imperfection!

I’m getting everybody’s votes, call it a natural selection!

Ash:
Hey, I’m the best of the best, like no one ever was!

You’re just a wacky old creep who looks like Santa Claus

Wait, I take that back, you look more like a Slaking

I treat my pokemon with care, besides, you deserve some smacking



With that long beard and face, you’re probably a pedophile

Why don’t you get your finches to clean the teeth of my Totodile

You have no pokemon, just take a look at my crew.

<p class="MsoNormal">I’d say a sex joke about your wife, but she’s probably ugly as you!

Darwin:
<p class="MsoNormal">You better watch out, cause now I’m releasing my smog

<p class="MsoNormal">You travelled with bitches, a blind guy, and Sonic the Hedgehog

<p class="MsoNormal">Who needs Pokemon? I can take you out on my own!

<p class="MsoNormal">You’ll never get a girlfriend, you’re forever friend-zoned!

<p class="MsoNormal">I’m smarter than all of your professors combined

<p class="MsoNormal">I made a theory that changed all of mankind!

<p class="MsoNormal">It’s been 16 years and you still don’t know you suck!

<p class="MsoNormal">Last night Misty came to my bed, and I gave her my “backwards Muk”!

Ash:
<p class="MsoNormal">If you think you can beat me, you are sadly mistaken

<p class="MsoNormal">You evovled from a Vigoroth, call me a fucking Hydriegon!

<p class="MsoNormal">You wanted to know the Orgin of Species? Arceus could’ve told you!

<p class="MsoNormal">Instead you did pointless research. Now, I choose you Pikachu!

Pikachu:
<p class="MsoNormal">Pika, Pikachu! Looks like I have been chosen!

<p class="MsoNormal">I’ll be shocking you with a thunderbolt, destroying you with an explosion!

<p class="MsoNormal">I’m the mouse with attitude, you’re just a pervy asshole

<p class="MsoNormal">Shave off your fucking beard, and we get a gay ass troll

<p class="MsoNormal">Your both gay and pedophillic, stay away from my bud,

<p class="MsoNormal">Or I’ll quick attack your ass, leavin nothing but blood!

<p class="MsoNormal">All you have with you are birds, in one shot, I’ll kill them all

<p class="MsoNormal">You’re not the evolution master, so suck my Electro Ballz!!

<p class="MsoNormal">

<p class="MsoNormal">Who won?