User blog:The Jonie/Epic Rap Battles of Everything S1E5: Joseph Kony vs Shaka Zulu

Hello. Welcome to Epic Rap Battles of Everything. Today, we have the leader of the LRA, Joseph Kony against the most influential monarch of the Zulu kingdom and founder of the Zulus, Shaka Zulu. Let's go!

DeStorm Power as Shaka Zulu

Klarity as Joseph Kony

Keegan-Michael Key as Goodwill kaBhekuzulu

EpicLLOYD as Thomas Edison (cameo)

Announcer
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF EVERYTHING!

JOSEPH KONY

VS.

SHAKA ZULU

BEGIN!

Joseph Kony
Walk into this battle with some African swag.

Against this guy who is all covered up in rags.

My army is has more young talent than your middle-aged men.

If you asked me for a loan, I wouldn't give you One Hen.

I got 88 hotties just behind my back.

This motherfucker looks like he's been trying to fast.

Ask Invisible Children what the fuck I do!

And let your virgin soldiers get married, too.

Shaka Zulu
Zulu army, killing and raving.

More complicated then your plans for sex slaving (Oh!)

I'll come back when your raps improve.

For now, stick to battling my #1 dude.

Goodwill kaBhekuzulu
Why don't you stop letting my little Africans try to die.

When you face off against my power vacuum Apartheid!

Giving my wives Mercedes-Benz, while you rape, fuck, and they can't comprehend it.

Because your most wanted tenture has just been ended.

Joseph Kony
Couldn't tell from your scrawly voice, what?

I've seen better shit come out of Mutt & Stuff.

Like Thomas Edison, you cannot pass.

How about you and your kingdom can kiss my ass!

Shaka Zulu
So much damn references, who are you rapping?

That's not my little ones you should be napping (With!)

As you keep dealing with small children cock.

Fuck you, have a good day, and eat a bag of those mountain rocks!

Announcer
Who won?

Whos next?

You decide!!!

EPIC RAAAP BATTLES OF EVERYTHINGGGG!

ASA
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