User blog:TCalderon/Deku vs Spider-Man: Weeb Shit vs Anything

Guys, I think I have a new favorite matchup.

So, I meant for this to be the penultimate battle of season one (simply because of how ambitious this ended up being), but after binging some of Season Three of My Hero, playing Spider-Man on PS4, rewatching Into the Spider-Verse, and watching Avengers: Endgame in theaters (twice)... I guess you could say I got into a "superhero mood", and decided to get this out of my system sooner rather than later. And not gonna lie, I'm really proud of how this turned out. These two characters and their subsequent franchises mean a lot to me, and I wanted to do them justice. I hope you have as much fun reading this as I did writing for it! :)

Izuku Midoriya, the powerful yet dorky student at U.A. High School, and Peter Parker, the Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man! These two battle it out to see which selfless hero is truly superior!

Beat: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V9u2kLIUGCc

WEEB SHIT VS ANYTHING!!!!!!!! IZUKU MIDORIYA

VS

PETER PARKER

BEGIN!!!!!!!

Deku:

In this exhibition match, I’ll be sure not to disappoint!

Going hard like Kirishima when I step up in this joint!

Normally, I wouldn’t think about fighting another hero,

But I’ll do whatever it takes just to break apart your ego!

For all your talk of being noble and “responsibility”,

You spend too much cracking jokes to earn any credibility!

I’ll swiftly serve a beatdown to Xavier's lost Mutant!

I’ve the support of my fellow students, while your crew finds you a nuisance!

Your rhymes will mirror your “Amazing” films; forgettable and sloppy!

As far as animal themed powers go, I’d say that I much prefer Froppy!

I’ll sock you in the face like you’re the Hero Killer, Stain!

I’ve got Uravity by my side, while you’re stuck with Mary Jane!

You’ll be left more enraged than your fans after the “spider-jizz” incident!

Better yet; more disappointed than after MVC Infinite!

I’d rather go through Aizawa’s training camp than sit through all your crap!

How can you think of fighting me when you get beaten by a finger snap?!

Spider-Man:

I had to put aside my hero-work to fight this baby boomer?

I’ve got better things to do than tend to “Steve Rogers Junior”!

But if a battle’s what he wants, then I suppose I could adhere,

Got a sense of humor so dry that I’ll finally wipe his tears!

I saved my city countless times; there’s no limit to what I’ve been through,

While in most of your fight scenes, you’re the one who’s being rescued!

I’m surprised you’re even fighting me, because knowing all your habits,

I’d expect you to pep-talk me while crushing your bones to ashes!

I get it; you’re new at this and all, but let me tell you something,

There’s a difference between selflessness and blatant self-destruction!

Not that you’d understand that; check your friendship with Kaachan

He treated your ass like shit, and you consider him a friend?!

I can get behind self sacrifice, but the way you go about it

Makes it seem like you took Midnight’s route of being masochistic!

The way you motivate those around you is enough to make the viewers groan,

You’ve no high horse to sit upon; your power isn’t even your own!

Deku:

I trained to earn my power, and I’ve been learning ways to fight!

It wasn’t gift wrapped all at once like it was a spider-bite!

'''And dissing me for my righteousness? You of all people should know;'''

Meddling when you don’t need to’s the essence of a hero!

Even if I’m not the strongest, I still practice what All Might told me,

Improving the lives of all my friends; just ask Todoroki!

I’ve more power than you’ve ever had in just my one knuckle!

'''Who are you to give me orders?! You couldn’t save your uncle!'''

Spider-Man:

Making petty disses like that is the essence of a dunce!

A surefire way for you to get your ass kicked more than once!

Your lyrics are packed with more lies than the papers at Daily Bugle,

Whereas mine are like the Rhino’s horn; unrelenting and brutal!

“Oh boo-hoo, I can’t be a hero, woe is me!”

Do you know how many of my friends have died right in front of me?!

Not everyone’s meant for hero work, so it’s best that you just stop,

Go ahead and drop the costume and instead be a cop!

Deku:

You’re right; I’m not cut out for this; what the hell was thinking?!

The hero world’s a scary place; I should go ahead and start quitting... Spider-Man:

God, I’m such a screw up; I guess I really am a menace

Maybe I should just hang up the mask and finally call it quits…

'''*Suddenly, from the shadows emerges two legendary heroes, as the beat changes to this! http://diamondstylepro.com/beat/the-winners*'''

All Might: 

I go out for two seconds and now, do my eyes deceive?

I'm having a hard time comprehending this; what about you, Steve?

Captain America: 

I see two heroes who’ve beaten each other to their last knee,

But not as hard as they’ve beaten themselves; I think it’s time we intervene!

Deku: 

'''All Might! What brings you here? Was it my behavior in this rap contest?'''

Please don’t try to cheer me up; I already know I’m not the best...

Spider-Man:

Same thing to you, Cap; I already know that I could never be an Avenger

I’ve been through a lot over the years; the last thing I need is a lecture...

Captain America: 

We came on by to tell you both that neither of you are failures,

And in fact, you both have what it takes to be the planet’s saviors!

There’s potential in you both, and we’re here to tell you why!

But I’m not sure about this other kid; I’ll leave that to this guy!

All Might:

'''Midoriya! Don’t be so hard on yourself; I was no different at your age,'''

Thinking of others before myself in my attempts to save the day!

That put me in a position where I could no longer help others,

But I know for a fact that you have what it takes to do it better!

What you may lack in experience you make up in conviction!

For you to keep your ideals and ideas of which you believe in!

Though you’ve made many mistakes, and have often found yourself beat,

That just means you’re on the path to be the Symbol of Peace!

Captain America: 

Same thing for you, Pete; this defeated outlook is so unlike you

Because truth be told, there’s no hero who can take as many hits as you do!

You’ve suffered many losses, many of which you played a part in,

That kinda thing would be enough for anyone else to up and quit!

Yet even when the chips are down, and it seems you’re getting quartered,

You take all those hits and find the power to move forward!

That’s a hero if I’ve seen one; that’s a title you’ve been endowed!

You have what it takes, Mr. Parker; I know you’ll make your Uncle proud

Spider-Man:

'''Gee, thank you, Cap! I guess that’s really what I needed.'''

Deku: 

'''Thanks for the kind words, All Might! You’re always the best at giving speeches!'''

Spider-Man:

'''Listen kid; sorry for the things I’ve said. Truth is, you have potential,'''

Keep up the practice, and I’m sure you’ll even be on the Avengers’ level!

Deku:

'''Thank you, Spidey! I apologise for all the things that I’ve said to you'''

You’re an honorable hero, and I hope to reach your level soon!

All Might:

'''Looks like this feud has ended; now c’mon! Let’s fight some evil!''' Captain America:

'''There’s a world that needs to be saved! AVENGERS ASSEMBLE!'''

WHO WON! '''WHO’S NEXT?!  YOU DECIDE! ''' WEEB SHIT- All Might, Deku, Captain America, & Spider-Man: PLUUUUSSS ULTRAAAA!!!

VS ANYTHING!!!!!

Who won? Deku Spider-Man All Might Captain America Opponents in need for hire!

Doctor Strange

Sterling Archer (I was thinking him vs Space Dandy)

Miss Kobayashi (I'm thinking either Daenerys Targaryen or Hiccup Haddock)

Ruby Rose