User blog:Dark Cyan/Cyan's Rap Battles 32: The Mane Six vs The G1 Mane Six

Hello, everyone. And welcome back to Cyan's Rap Battles!

This is my CRB S2 finale! Finally, after almost two weeks of waiting, your patience has paid off! The battle is also a celebration on Bronies in this community, and as such, I have some guests; Skeep as Twilight Sparkle, Lexi as Rarity, Kung as both Applejacks, GIR as Pinkie Pie, Night as Fluttershy, TK as Rainbow Dash and Matt as G4 Spike.

Next season will start on New Year's Eve with a sequel literally nobody's expecting. Also, in the new year, CRB and CRBoL will be alternating weekly, technically making both series' fortnightly. You're not getting a news blog full of hints this time (that won't be stuck to) either :3

Anyway, this battle pits The Mane Six from My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic against the 'G1 Mane Six'; The six ponies, taken from various Generation 1 movies and specials, that were the six ponies Lauren Faust originally planned to make FiM with.

Thank you all for supporting me thus far, and as always,

Enjoy!

Beat: Mystic Blast

Twilight Sparkle
(starts at 0:15)

It’s Twilight and she’s in the Zone; you’ll be seeing stars once I’m through with you

Toying with you ‘til you’re left paralysed in a pose grimdark fics can’t compare to

I’ve encountered monsters and demons; Nickelodeon slime is your biggest threat

You rap with a rhyme scheme more inconsistent than your color palette

(Twilight fast raps. Two lines in fast rap are the same speed as one of the above lines)

You don’t fully comprehend the principles of magic.

It’s my element, while your kind takes it for granted

Your talent’s limited while I’m truly omnipotent.

Your only prominent appearances are in obscure comics

You’ll see that my magic’s more than tricks,

When foundations ask you to “Make a Wish”

Your raps are corrupted, but not by curse or spell,

So you’d better Moo-check yourself before you Ti-wreck yourself

Twilight
(starts at 0:47)

Excuuuuse me, Princess! Your victory is less likely than if your Library were to return!

I may as well call this verse ‘Lesson Zero’ because you just never seem to learn!

I’ve honestly never seen a worse case of bad character development than you

To transform from a sour, grumpy sociopath to Her Royal Highness, Miss Mary Sue!

I may look harmless but I’ll mess you up worse than your writers ruined Magical Mystery Cure

Then I’ll be chilling with my Moondancer while you’re being a bad friend to yours

I wish, I wish, I wish you would leave ‘Friendship’ to Celestia and ‘Magic’ to Star Swirl

I’m from the first ever MLP pilot, and my movie still sucked less than Equestria Girls!

Rarity
(new beat starts at 0:12)

I'll be causing rap Manifestation on my background pony Inspiration

My rhymes are most divine, darling, from a more refined generation.

Spare me the spittle, Sparkler, Twilightis the only Sparkle I like

Spar with this spectacle? Please, I've the spiff and spells adored by Spike

You cannot Escape this rapping Catrina, I've sewn this victory like it was a dress,

Given a generous, fabulous beating, one fit for Canterlot class of the highest

Being honest, your friend's verse would sicken Diamond Dogs with such vulgarity

Forget The Smooze, you've just faced your true biggest Nightmare, Rarity!

Sparkler
(starts at 0:33)

Like the sister you neglect, you must be drawing a Blank

No diamonds in that cypher, just that one on your flank!

I thought I'd be following the brightest star!

But instead you've had better luck with business than with those bars

You're a prissy prima donna obsessed with dresses and looks

I'm surprised you're spittin' disses with the risk of chipping a hoofy-woof!

Good luck with your X'th attempt to start a dress shop elsewhere

But you're stuck in a one-horse town pretending it's a Vanity Fair!

Applejack
(new beat starts at 0:26)

It’s silly to kick a flow at Bucky McGill and Kicks McGee

‘Cause mah legs don’t make promises mah mouth can’t keep

Burn ya like the Cross Weather Witch scorched up yer garden

You’ll need help, Ah’ll let ya Call Upon the Sea Ponies ‘fore startin’

I prefered ya when ya went all “crocadilly pet of Tirek’s”

Bad at rapping: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3NUgUu2_gBc Who is? You is!] Ah reckon yer gettin’ rekt

Yer just Megan’s ponysona, and yer voice makes my ears ache

Steppin’ tah me’s a clumsier mistake than even Derpy’d make

Applejack
(starts at 0:46)

Derpy’s that background pony, right? Nope, wait, that’s you

Our differences are like that rodeo: your ribbon isn’t blue

I was perfect the way I was so they made you a perfect rehash

Then added a hat, lasso, and an apple-dash of trailer trash

I’ll shell this troll with the hardest apples I can find

But I’m sure she won’t learn from it, this pony’s lost her mind

G4 won the war, but this battle goes to G1

I just crushed the beat and this pony; applesauce anyone?

Pinkie Pie
(new beat starts at 0:23)

Alright Cyan, Ready the Announcer! Pinkie's got a gambit.

That you'll need to name that baby's verse into "Surprise's Lament!"

So cram it! Seriously, that laugh is manic! You're making fillies sad.

And mock my prior raps all you want, still better than your baked bads!

I'm the Element of Laughter! You're a disaster hacking flightless colts!

Who's defeat couldn't happen faster if she was struck down with The Wonderbolts!

So Who Won and Who's Next? Afraid that's not your choice to make!

Because I'll smile, smile, smile when I start this batch of Cupcakes!

(Wink!)

Surprise
(starts at 0:47) Surprise, motherbucker! I had a feeling my team needs me!

Geez, Pinkie! This time it's not a Sandwich that's Cheesy!

"Testing, Testing, 123" already proved you can't rap!

But that verse was so bad, even I got a twitchy tail from that!

I've had Draggle and the Gizmonks wrapped around my hoof!

And you're supposed to be my successor? You're more like my spoof!

Hey, Psycho. You're, um, supposed to be the Element of Laughter?

EHEEHEEHEEHEEHEE! Kneel before the true jape master!

(beat stops)

Wait, did you counter my disses before I made them?

Yessiree!

Oh, you're good. Too good...

Dawwwww. Thanks, Surprise!

Hey, after this is all done, I got a friend called Fizzy. You'll love her. Wanna all hang out?

Um, excuse me. We're in the middle of a rap battle so if you two could, um, let me rap now, I'd, um, really appreciate it. If you don't mind...

Fluttershy
(new beatstarts at 0:27)

I tamed a dragon and Draconequus, and I'll do the same for you with rhymes.

You can Escape From Catrina, but now you're caught in Hurricane Fluttershy.

I give woodland creatures love and tender care,

But if you step out of line and step to me, I'll give you the Stare!

So hush now, quiet now, you ought to silence your two lips

Before I bring my animals to stampede and flatten your rows of tulips,

And if it has to come to that, I hope you'll beg my pardon

When I say your flowers will look more horrifying than seeing Cheerilee's Garden

Posey
(starts at 0:48)

OH! Oh, I'm sorry. You gave me a start...

I didn't catch your name. Was it Shady? Thistle Whistle? Sweetheart?

Your whole Moe archetype is less original than yet

Another time you flip your [http://mlp.wikia.com/wiki/Bats! shit] then conveniently reset!

So stop pretending your TV inclusion is anything but lucrative,

Or I'll get so Crab-Nasty I'll be branded a Fugitive!

You're going to LOVE ME when I COME OUT and say that you're crazy!

And if you ever fuck with my garden, you'll be pushing up daisies!

Rainbow Dash
(new beat starts at 0:19)

Spike, stop wasting time with this lame mare,

Well, well, a well wetted pony that can’t fly with damp hair?

On the opposite of your drawbridge, it’s sure you’re not true

See, the songs of the sea are weaker than my melodies: Shoo-be-doo!

The Element of Loyalty comes to battle this Midnight Castle filly

Not Rescuing anypony, squandering with Wonderbolts is silly

The Sonic Boom’s got the flows to leave your dolls dismantled

I’m just training! This 20% Cooler show will leave yours cancelled!

Firefly
(starts at 0:39)

Confound this meme filled verse! Not even ‘Ten seconds flat’ could have saved it

‘Cuz nobody’s preferred pony is getting crushed by Lauren Faust’s all-time favourite!

While I’m Dancing On Air, you’re crashing through windows and walls.

Danger is my Life, but even I wouldn’t be as two-faced as Rainbow Falls

Look up what ‘Loyalty’ actually means, because you’ve got the wrong impression.

You’re such a Ne’er-Do-Well that your friends needed to stage an intervention!

So listen up, Dash. (Firefly whips her tail dry) Take this from a real flying wiz,

Your rapping skill is not as sick as your massive ego thinks it is.

Spike
(new beat starts at 0:23)

Spike's ready to spit hot fire that'll send you straight to Celestia!

You're more of a coward than Fluttershy, so you'll learn to fear who's besting ya!

Your speech is Garbled. I'll leave you out like a playset of G1 merch!

Maybe you'll actually find good rhymes in your verse. Now THAT should be Spike's Search

Bring all your Princess Dragon pals! I've got the wit to go it alone!

I'll clean the castle with your ass, no hassle, and that'll be my Dragon Code.

You'll get owned! I'm the princess's number one assistant,

And I'll send you and Scorpan packing back to Tirek if you try to get persistant!

Spike
(starts at 0:45)

Those lines weren't bad for a glorified fax machine

I'm just a baby dragon, but I'm more mature than this tween

You're a butler to a Princess, sorting books for Twilight

Hate to say it, but you're turning into G3 Spike!

Oh ma gawd! Friendzoned by a mare you can't impress!

And we all know that greed is the Secret of your Excess

Your best performance was when you were a mute dog in a schoolbag

I'd say "Owl's Well That Ends Well" but those mere words make me gag!

Discord
(new beat starts at 0:11)

Speaking of gag, I have one that'll knock you off your legs!

We've seen the best. We've seen the first. Now let's see the worst instead

I summon from Bronies' nightmares seven ponies of pure horror

Meet the Ponies who very nearly made this whole franchise a goner!

The Core 7
(Pinkie Pie is pink, Rainbow Dash is blue , Toola-Roola is light pink , Starsong is violet , Cheerilee is dull pink , Scootaloo is orange , Sweetie Belle is white)

(starts at 0:22)

Straight from the depths of hell, it's G3.5! All you little poinies should hoof it!

Because we spit it absolutely, definitely, positively sick!

Urgh, that I was reincarnated as such a tomboy, how truly vile!

I'm the original dashing mare that always dresses in style!

I don't know why Faust proposed six has-beens to Hasbro for her business venture

While you're having tea parties in meadows, we're on a Twinkle Wish Adventure!

As for the 'Elements of Harmony' that gave rise to the bronies,

You're not porn stars to be jacked off to! You're PONIES!

All I can hear is Minty, Zipzee, BlytheBaxter and JulietStarling

Now here's my little sister and her friend. Teach them a lesson, darlings!

Cool beans! The rektage dial's just been turned up to eleven!

'Cuz a dozen whorses and their Scrappies got totally pwned by the Core 7!

Poll
WHO WON? The Mane Six w/ Spike The G1 Mane Six w/ Spike The Core 7 w/ Discord