User blog:MrAwesome300/Batman vs. Spidey. Epic Rap Battles of Film, S1E1

So since I came back, I haven't made any new raps. This includes any series, regular battles, or tourney battles. My blog's been kinda lonely lately ;-;

Introducing Epic Rap Battles of Film, since video games and cartoons have already been mastered. In the first installment, we have DC Comics innovator Batman against Marvel pinnacle Spider Man.

Battle
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5_HCYNjNYUI

Batman
(starts at 0:14)

Michael Keaton era Batman is rapping.

Remember my name, Petey, I'll knock you down like Flash Thompson

I'll make your life more of a living hell than you did beating Green Goblin

I dance like the devil in the pale moonlight, you're hardly a hero, nerd

You can't even beat a cripple, a pile of sand, or a dumbass dressed as a bird

Yo, I'm a billionaire, a visionary, I'm fucking Christian Bale

You can't even get a boner from my lady, Vicki Vale

Your fanbase is made up of nerds and naïve kids at the age of 10

Hell, you bawl at the market just seeing a box of Uncle fucking Ben's

Spider Man
(starts at 0:41)

Schwarzenegga, plz, never has a franchise been in such terror

Since Tim Burton gave up and you let the Penguin be Gotham's mayor

Tobey Maguire may no more, but at least I'm not Peter Affleck

I have no trouble with girls: Mary Jane, Gwen Stacy, plenty of ass sex

Let me sling a web at your reputation, I guess I'll sit here masturbatin'

I'm even a prodigy at wrestling, Bruce, so of course my heart is a-racin'

So go make out with your bird, Dick Grayson, I can already sense the fear embracin'

You might shower in cash, but I take complete charge like J. Jonah Jameson

Batman
(starts at 1:08)

Batman just Returned, and as this knight gets darker I'll unmask you lyrically and batarang this bitch named Parker

Aunt May even loves me, my rhymes are an Amazing Fantasy

Alfred will clean your attitude up and the cobwebs out your hands, you see,

I'm the savior of comics and I just bought 35 Coopers

You couldn't even get into the Avengers, so you can't that much super!

Robin
Sorry to be a party pooper, but I need to face this loser

Clean your thick glasses, son, after Spider Man 3, you became a new jerk!

Spiderman
(starts at 1:36)

Watch me devastate the rich class more than when I killed your mom and dad,

Robin shouldn't even rap for you, he's too busy wiping your crappy batass

You'll be done by your next movie, and Nolan's already down the road

You'll sit around watching episodes of your campy 60s show

And I'm proud to be a nerd, because I can still do the math

That Arkham belongs to the Joker, and he's got the last laugh!

Joker's maniacal laugh is heard in the background as the battle fades to black.

Who won? Batman (and Robin) Spiderman