Talk:Gordon Ramsay vs Julia Child/@comment-5393732-20160516174647

Ramsay:

As I say mate, a perfect rizzotto (Right)

Mrs. ... Child, welcome to the grown-ups' table

I've only slightly two minutes (/I've got exatcly two minutes), and you should be grateful

Cause I'm in the fucking league, with all these shows to pitch

Keep my ovens preheated and my pilots greenlit

I'm a season skillet, you're a Palm Springs pan

I got Michellin stars, you're like the Michelin Man

I'm rolling in dough like Beef Wellington from ???

And I'm ??? on you like I'm ???

Child:

Oh, isn't that a wonderful a thing!

A grumpy little chef who things he can bring

Enough salt to justify getting... okay we already know most of this now

You're a namby-pamby candy-ass ???, Gordon Ramsay

You couldn't rap yourself out of a pastry bag, understand me?

I laugh and create, you ??? and destroy

But fear, my dear boy, is less ???ous than joy

Ramsay:

I'm glad you got that off your giant, flabby chest

I'd call you Donkey, but you look more like Shrek

When the Iron Man Chef busts a rhyme,

I'll open up on you like a fine red wine

I'm a culinary innovator, you're no creator

Regurgitatin' French breads like a glorified translator

I'm fresh, you're past your expiration date

Aight, fuck it. Blue team, drop the boullion plates (Yes chef!)

I seen your little show, and it sure ain't pretty

One part Big Bird, two parts Miss Piggy

You can't test me with your fancy repicies

Cause you're top(?) master in the art of heart disease

I mean it's rubbish! (Yes chef) Look at page 408

Tell me who the flying (Yes chef) fuck would like to cook calf brains(?)

You call these (Yes chef) ??? raw, they're stale and soft

Now here, take this jacket

...

Now give it back and fuck off!

Child:

Oh please, your defeat's guaranteed

Concede! I've got this in the bag, sous-vide!

Ha, Michelin indeed! You've done well for yourself

But as a person, you couldn't get a star on Yelp!

I could freeze a steak with those frosted tips

What's with that bitter taste in every word from your lips?

You scream at women, you ought to ??? that your ???

Makes YOU the pissiest bitch in the kitchen!

I'll pat you on the head, ??? you, and stick a ???

Anything's good with enough butter, boo-ya!

Oh, I'm so glad you spent this time with me

Now eat a dick - bon apetit!