User blog:Antoinette Jones-Juin/Kyle's Literal Reviews/Let's Make Fun of Rap Battles Crossover (PART 1)

TBA

Mordecai:
Ohhh no, it’s time to battle a pony,

Why are you "Ohhh no"ing? And of course it's time for you to battle a pony, we can see the freaking title cards!

I could play video games on a T.V made by sony.

...your POINT?

So you are a pony named after a movie about vampires,

Actually, just her first name. Sparkle isn't in the title of Twilight last I recall...

Your pink friend is pyscho, and the orange one is a liar.

Okay, SEVERAL things wrong with that. First off, Pinkie Pie has only been a psyco (aka Pinkamena AKA Cupcakes) for like, what? 2-3 episodes? And Applejack was a liar for only 2 episodes.

Even though i can’t fly and you’re blue friend can fly,

Yeah...

I’ll just cut her wings off and watch her die,and i’ll turn her into burger meat,

WAIT, WAIT, WAIT. If you cut off her wings, then she won't simply DIE. And why in the world of Equestria would you turn her into... BURGER MEAT?!

that’ll teach her for being such a douchebag and getting on my nerves!

...but...she... SHE ISN'T EVEN IN THIS RAP BATTLE!! SHE DIDN'T EVEN TALK TO YOU! I.. WHAT?

Twilight:
Your friendship isn't magic, it’s just so cruel,

We know, Twilight.

I could get my pet dragon and win this punchies duel.

But, Spike is kinda a wimp. And also, this is a rap battle. Not a punchies duel, or a Magic Duel; just a RAP BATTLE. Plus, he could win it if he is doing it. If he's not, I guess he's just there for... comedy relief?

Calm down little bird, go back to Fluttershy,

Well, we can all agree that that bird is Mordecai...

cause i think you got away and got high.

...wait, he's high?

This place is Ponyville, which means no giant birds

WHO... WHO DA FUC TOLD YOU DAT?

Princess Celestia tells you everything cause you never learned.

How do you know that though?

'''How much love did you get? i’m guessing none,'''

Well, for starters, he got a kiss.

cause your personality is just a piece of horse dung.

...I got nothing?

Mordecai:
I’m high, said the pony who has a pink friend,

QUESTION MARKS, USE DEM. And stop referencing Pinkie Pie as pink friend. Please.

that’s always smoking meth and it will be the end,

...She isn't.

'''of her, Sparkle? i bet that bell didn't rung'''

...wut

And by the end of the song i’ll just say yay-yuh!

...why? Cause your about to get PWNED by Shining?

Shining Armor:
Hey, don’t you talk to my sister like that, i could kick you’re butt,

I think we know; unicorns over lazy birds.

I wish you and you’re gay friend got sprayed by that skunk.

STOP PUTTING EVERY GAY REFERENCE YOU HAVE!!

'''How can fight me? i am married and you’re not,'''

But... Mordecai has a GF. THAT'S gotta be worth SOMETHING. C'mon. Huh? Huh? No?

The elements of harmony will take you away from Canterlot!

...How? Why? He didn't do anything bad. Jerk. ;_;

Outro
Well, that's the end of it! Blah, blah, blah have a nice day- huh? Wait... something's happening! AHHH!

[Link to Part 2]