User blog:SophisticatedShark/Barney Stinson vs Julius Caesar - Bad Battle Suggestions 8

So here's the one I've been holding onto for a bit. Funny thing is that between then and now, I've finished the next battle. I'm sure a lot of people here would like the suggestion for the next one, it gets thrown around a lot. So anyways, here's the famous playboy Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother versus the glorious Roman Emperor, Julius Caesar. I also would like to thank BreZ real quickly for some inspiration from his battle (mostly just the first line but other than that you should still check it out.) Check it out.



BAD BATTLE SUGGESTIONS OF HISTORRRYY!!!!

JULIUS CAESAR 

VS 

BARNEY STIIIIIIIIIINSOOOOOOON

BEGIN!!!!

Barney Stinson
Challenge accepted! We all know that the Stinson's gonna win this

It's guaranteed the suit and tie is gonna crush this bathrobe dingus

You're more brutal than Brutus, a bigger asshat than Crassus

I'll burn you up in flames just like a magic trick, you fascist.

I'm the baddest. Call me Doctor Horrible, I'll score ya gory

You're more boring than you're sorely horrid play. True story.

Whatcha compensating for with that harmless little army?

When I finish this verse, your last words: Et tu Barney?

Julius Caesar
Thumbs down to you sir, you little quarter-shit canuck

I'll spit these rhymes so hard like you get hit by a bus

I'll cross this whore so bad that we should dub him the Rhine

Just call me an MC: better by him eleven hundred times

You're a gambling, shambling man so bow and kiss my feet

Got seven wenches in a week? Well I got Cleo on her knees

So watch as the Romans go and own your pithy filthy bros

But you'll draw out this battle like 9 seasons of your show

Barney  Stinson
Tenth rule of the bro code: a bro will help one dump a chick

But I don't need Ted to drop this dress-wearing tranny dick

Julius Caesar
You dare oppose me? Well you must be high on sandwiches

Your own raps are a failure just like your very marriages

Barney Stinson
You're a flower wreath Benito with more cheese than Little Caesar

I've seen more competent leaders in King Julius, the lemur

Julius Caesar
Unlike your city, my empire contained the greatest minds who'd think

Like a purple retarded dinosaur, you're about to be extinct

Barney Stinson
Against this master of the tables? Watch me dominate your palace

You really are the Gaius if you'd love a stone hard phallus

Nothing suits me better, Julie, you're as worthless as your denarius.

In this battle of the greatest I'm the truly legen... wait for it ...darius. Legendarius.

Julius Caesar
Well I've conquered those of East and West, you've banged the ho's of East and West

Why don't you write in your playbook how you got fucked up by the best

You've reached your rapping rough patch, so you can eat my salad, fatty

You may have lived without a father but in this battle, I'm your daddy

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?



YOU DECIDE

'''BAD RAP BATTLES OF ............... HISTOOOOOOOORRRYYY'''

 Who Won? Barney Stinson Julius Caesar