User blog:Turbofrog/Epic Fanfiction Battles of History 1: Charles Darwin vs. Ash Ketchum (with Light Yagami)

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!

Charles Darwin VERSUS Ash Ketchum!!!

Ketchum: Who chose you?! Donkey Kong?

I'll knock you so flat, you'll look like Bronzong!

I got 40 badges, what have you got, NOTHING!

Don't look back, I'll think of something,

Maybe your DEATH in this battle, the end of your career,

Just look at all 4 girlfriends, all in the same year!

Darwin: My therories of evolution changed mankind,

A lot more than the 151 you need to find!

What do you evolve into? A jellyfish?

I'll shatter you like a China dish!

Why can't you just be a friggin cat?

It's better than you, so I give toast to that!

You been 10 years old for 13 years, man

Get your Pikachu and back into a van!

Ketchum: PIKACHU I CHOOSE YOU!

Pikachu: I got a Thunderbolt waiting for you, you know

I'll knock you back into the snow!

I'll use a couple Revives when it comes to this battle,

'Cause when it comes to you, this battles like loose cattle!

I never die, I just faint,

I'll grafitti your house with lots of coloured spray paint,

A Magikarp is more powerful than you

It'll knock you back INTO THE TRAINER SCHOOL!

Darwin: Youre a little crap,

Now get some ass

Who to choose, only 4 girls to choose from

I'd just go back to pokemon.com

It wouldn't be surprising if you evolved into an ape after a rock,

Right before you would encounter Brock!

Wait? Whos that in the shadow?

Light Yagami: In my quest to purify the world,

I've encountered asses, almost made me hurl!

With my notebook, you both will lose

A little bit more than a bruise! HAHAHAHA!

Darwin: What the hell were you thinking, Ash

When he came we should have made a Rapi-dash!

I can feel myself dying, the fat lady sings,

I'll come back, MAYBE WITH WINGS!

Yagami: The Death Note worked again, as of course!

And thankfully, I don't feel remorse!

If you get a Life Note, tell me please

I could control the planet, all with ease!

Ketchum: With my Pokemon united, I will catch them all

Looks like you better make a curtain call!

I like battling, so I'll make this fair,

Talk to Ryouk and DIE ON THE STAIRS.

Who Won? Who's Next?Turbofrog (talk) 08:57, July 17, 2012 (UTC)