User blog:Hairy Woodchuck/Ramsay Bolton vs John Bolton

Ramsay:

Welcome to the seven kingdoms, you filthy piece of vermin

I have a memo leak here- my win's been predetermined

Because victors in these lands are strong, young, and fast

It has nothing to do with the size of your 'stache

You're just a stupid pathetic little beady-eyed freak.

I'll torture you and make you my second reek.

Every enemy I meet, I attack and destroy.

What I'll do to you will be far worse than I did to Theon Greyjoy

John:

I am from the USA, bastard. My men are strong as bulls

This battle will be so lopsided that it will actually be quite dull

Wanna know why? Here, I'll answer in full-

And I'm warning you, your comebacks are completely null-

'Cause I'm a war criminal!

My morality is minimal!

You're going to regret being so arrogant and cynical!

I may be older, but that doesn't mean I'm less physical

Perhaps you forgot about how things work in my world-

My military would obliterate your group of little girls

When it comes to bullets and tanks, you better live in fear

'Cause do you think guns and bombs will lose to swords and spears?

This Bolton is the smartest, the elitest, the beast!

I'll destroy all of Westeros like I did the Middle East!

Ramsay:

You came here alone. You and what army?

When my sword goes through your heart, you won't look so smarmy

You're damn right, I would never want to come to Earth

You guys cheat with huge weapons rather than use strength and self-worth

I could beat you even while I take a huge dump

Then I'll cut off your little dick, and send it to Trump!

Johnny you just messed with the wrong Westerosi

You'll have more nightmares about me than you have of Nancy Pelosi!

John:

You literally just admitted that me and my army are stronger

I don't think this battle has to go for much longer

In America, punishment happens in a special place, so let me say

I want to welcome you to Guantanamo Bay

Ramsay:

I killed my father, before I killed my stepmother

I didn't care that she was holding my baby brother

This whiny little advisor needs to come back to reality

I'll fight you Mortal Kombat style, and get a fatality

John:

There are 197 sovereign countries on Earth

Even the weakest ones are stronger than this land of rocks and dirt

For my taking- any nation, any money, population

Any oil, resources, or government administration

And I have no regrets, qualms, or feeling of sorrow

When I start a nuclear war, there will be no tomorrow!