User blog:Minipop56/Epic Rap Battles of Nerdiness: Ep. 3- Mark Zuckerberg vs Jeff Bezos

Jeff Bezos:

I am Jeff Bezos! The reinventor of reading!

And shopping. And media! Oh, f*** it! Everything!

You're Plain, not Rich! Just like Facebook's crappy text!

Even MySpace is less boring than it with CSS!

Facebook was made for molestation! Amazon helps people!

Didn't you know that all your friends were evil?

You're a college sellout! And a Simpson's character!

I'm virtually a college seller! And the face of America!

And you're a fencing, photo-stealing motherzucker with no brain!

By the end, you'll be trekking through the Amazon. Feel the pain!

Now why don't you put your face in a book and read the

Million word Wikipedia page on Facebook's failure!

Zuckerberg: 

Ha! Your rhymes are embarrassing! I'll run them over!

With your own Amazon cart, you Wal-mart clerk poser.

And now I'm gonna update my status and teach and school ya,

About how I showed your wife my Facebook toolbar.

Your users sell apples for eight hundred dollars and

Then label them as Apple Computers. What, man?

Your products are only helpful for thieves! It's outrageous!

And for people who are too weak to turn paper pages!

You waste time on money and waste money on time! Merely,

You donated forty billion to a cuckoo clock! Really?

How do you think you're going to escape the web I wove?

I'll trap you with addiction; you can't escape the flow!

Jeff Bezos: 

You won't survive when I ConnectU to my fist!

You made your website just to see who was the "hottest".

You've got no potential! You're a gossiper who makes me furious!

Facebook's used by sluts! How'd you get rich? I'm curious.

Zuckerberg:

I made a Google Plus account, and I became the most followed!

Everywhere I go, I dominate! You're just in my shadow!

You have more sex than I have money, and that's not meagre!

I saw how many children you have; you're a bit too eager!