User blog:Triple-Stabber :P/Stuart Ashen vs Gordon Ramsay - Rap Battle Thingy

So it's been a while eh? Why it took so long for this one? Well, I was deciding to either post it now or after Ashens: The Quest for the Gamechild 2 to come out. I chose the former cuz you are reading this

So no Rap Meanings cuz I'm lazy, so just ask in the comments and I'll answer back

So yeah, hopefully the next one will not be that long to make, oh yeah. Thanks to Mendes for a better word to use than my own. So give him some chocolate or somethin

Anyways, let's go!

Stuart Ashen is red

Gordon Ramsay is light blue

Nemesis is gray

Blue Team is blue

Beginning
Stuart Ashen!

VS!

Gordon Ramsay!

Begin!

Stuart Ashen
Hello! Ashens here sporting the suit and red tie,

And today, I'll review a Cowell knock-off who his dad made him cry.

In 10 minutes, I'll leave your body with Fifty Thousand Shades of Red,

You'll choke cuz my raps are harder to swallow than the food that you got fed.

You're not interesting at all, not even worthy for the drawer,

So I'll burn this cold hearted tosser til he's soft, I'm a thawer.

I got The World's Sharpest Raps that'll leave this cook Nerd-cubed,

Call him Sad Onions, he'll be crying worst than his battle's accent on YouTube.

While you drive yourself insane and can't catch yourself a break,

I'll spit Bars-hens at this frosted tipped twit like a cupcake.

Add a drizzle of olive oil for you to slip up on your raps,

Your Hag is tossing your kid in the trash like some scraps.

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Beat this Quest with my Game, Childish insults do no harm,

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">I'll burn this Baker blackened til he can't hear the fire alarm.

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">This'll be your Great Escape, so break a leg and run,

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">And that's how you make the perfect verse well. Done.

Gordon Ramsay
<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Today on Hell's Kitchen, you'll be ashes when I'm Playing With Fire,

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">And In The Heat Of The Kitchen, I'll torch cheapo-land's top buyer.

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Cooking up some fresh raps, that's the entree dish to be started,

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Being burnt is the main course and in the end, you'll be deserted.

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Same format in 10 years, It's like you're forever on pause,

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Those rhymes were ewe, I'll make em gone like "WHERE'S THE LAMB SAUCE?!"

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">British guy spewing insults and reviews stuff that's shitty?

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Make a review on yourself cuz you're a knock-off of me!

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">This MC has more star ratings and slicker rhymes than a fucking non-stick pan!

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">I'm a blackbelt that's gonna dish out at your place, call it Poundland.

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">I'm a Culinary Genius with the expertise to suit,

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">You're a British idiot in a ill-fitted suit.

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">I like my beef bloody red and steaks best like Mignon,

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">While yours are still soft when you say they're well done.

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">I'll melt you like butter into your sofa's colours: Brown!

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Your show blows more than a fucking inflatable fucking crown!

Stuart Ashen
<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Here's a Terrible Old Lame You'v Probably Never Heard Of,

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">He's a blonde who's "raw", I see where the chicken can's based off.

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">This goner fell off his business, so he made a mobile game,

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">but it failed so now he mocks his fans for some Twitter fame.

Gordon Ramsay
<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">I am now Beyond Boiling Point, you'll be in hot water fucker!

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Time to crank my fire to high against Simon Pegg's aborted brother!

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">You're a worst joke than Nino, with Amy's delusions

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Your Channel makes me Flip, you're a shitty NC tat version!

Stuart Ashens
<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">...

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Right...I'll spit on you like an omelette, cuz that verse fuckin stank,

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">This Jerk-of a wanker has no grasp on this battle, like his prank.

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">I'll delete your shows cuz they're literally like the Proxys,

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Same shows like bloody hell, are you still doing these?

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Tire people out and then brag about your fattening stars?

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">You should be locked up right behind me cuz you're Behind Bars.

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">You scramble when it's your Boiling Point, you'll turn into a soft boiled egg,

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">I'll add more scars to your face, it'll hurt worst than you squashed your leg.

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">This YouTube mate's in this suit great while your shows are getting worse like Lootcrate,

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Bittergourd-on making Kitchen Nightmares when his cooks make fucking food late.

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Here's a Sharticle: "Comedian beats a blonde Oliver on his period"

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">I'll punch you harder than Nemesis. <span style="color:rgb(128,128,128);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">IT'S NEE-MUH-SAI YA IDIOT!

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Get it through your head that you'll get second place, Silverskull,

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Beat and dig your grave with this shovel, so where's your funeral?

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">So leave this battle, pissed off! You'll be forever stuck in outbursts,

<span style="color:rgb(255,29,29);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Cuz this Technical Comedian beaten Idiocy with an Excellent verse.

Gordon Ramsay
<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Like a French pig, I'll roast ya when I spit,

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">And with that horrendous verse, you should fucking 86 it!

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">I got the edge to win, filet! With haute cuisine, brulee!

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Toss you over it, sautee! Then I'll crush ya, sorbet!

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">You lost your friends cuz you got your knickers in a tit for tat,

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">And same with your girl, you'll lose this battle to this teacher, twat.

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">I'm an exquisite, extraordinary chef with the Passion,

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">For Flavoured dishes while you're Extra-ordinary, Ashens.

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">I'll Make It Easy for you to know my next line, understood?

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Dan has made better gags that your show ever could.

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Ask my team! <span style="color:rgb(0,0,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">"Delete your channel!" <span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Those are great Ideas Men!

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">But Ashens still Box cuz what's the worst that could happen?

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Well first, go to your local Tech Dump and grab your faulty twit,

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">Then you toss it in the oven and wait til it's burnt to shit.

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">I win every kind of star when I Pop up in Stations

<span style="color:rgb(0,224,255);font-family:Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13.3333px;font-weight:normal;">And I won this battle too sine you faked this intervention

End
Who won?

You don't decide who's next!

I do!

Who won? Stuart Ashen Gordon Ramsay Nemesis Blue Team All of em

Like my shit? look at my last battle, it's better than this