User blog:JKGame/Baldi vs Archimedes: Epic Rap Battles of The Universe

Heyoooo, Epic Rap Battles of The Universe is back! And we start our return with a battle that wasn't even hinted at in the news?

Ok, I was originally going to do Sims vs Tomodachi Life, but I thought of this matchup recently and loved it a lot, so I decided to delay the other battle to come after this one. And no more delays for it. I promise. For now, let's dive right into this!

"Greek mathematician, Archimedes, and title character of the game Baldi's Basics in Education and Learning, Baldi, rap against each other to see who is truly better at math, but wait, Baldi won't be alone in this fight..."

Battle
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF THE UNIVERSE!!!

 

Begin!

Archimedes:
I made it clear not to disturb my circles, yet you come here for a fight

The only scary part about your game is the graphics. Now that's quite a sight!

Your method of horror has been exhausted, relying solely on jumpscares

When it comes to your chances of winning, I'd say it's as thin as your one strand of hair

I'm the leading man in antiquity, while you're just a knockoff of Slenderman!

Whose only reason to exist is to be nothing but a gaming fad!

With flow like bath water, it's clear that Mavis Beacon is screwed

I'll take a dump On this Sphere and Cylinder and send him back to his school!

Baldi:
Oh, hi! Welcome to my schoolhouse, Archimedes!

But Playtime's over, so take a seat! I can beat you in one clean sweep, sweep, sweep!

You may have done great things, but it's too bad no one remembers you exist!

And I'd grade your verse and works an F! There's room for improvement on your treatises!

I'll blast you out like a can of B-Soda! I don't think you ever multiplied!

I'll use your Principle and leave you as a Floating Body from my flow and rhymes!

I get angrier for every weak rhyme you spit, so I'll give you eight good slaps!

I'd send you to detention, but I suggest you instead GET OUT WHILE YOU STILL CAN!

Archimedes:
Eureka! It looks like I figured out why your game sucks!

It's a glitchy, ugly mess! And you expect to be donated with some bucks?!

Your victory's just as impossible as the math problems you like to give

And you spank kids for failing them? Sound likes an overreaction!

What's Sonic's Schoolhouse plus more boredom? I'll let you do the math

You have excellent ears, yet you can't hear that you can't rap!

Your game was part of a contest? Good thing it didn't get 1st Prize!

I stole your victory like a Bully! Beating you was as easy as pi!

Viktor 'Strobovski':
Oh, hello there, Archimedes. I'm VERY GLAD to join this bout!

No need to worry though, Baldi, I'm here to help you out!

Let's Mr. Mix things up! Not even in little puss mode, will you be able to beat us two!

You seem to lack knowledge in rapping, so how about you hit the notebooks?

Keep thinking that you're still relevant, and you'll lose your sanity, man!

You're only known for your catchphrase! Pascal has you beat in important works of math!

You should not have done this. Now you have no choice but to surrender

Or suffer the same fate you had with that Roman soldier!

WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE!

EPIC-

(The logo gets repeatedly slapped by Baldi's ruler)

OW! OW! RAP BATTLES OF THE UNIVERSE!!!

Poll
Who won? Baldi and Viktor Archimedes

Hints for the next battle
You already know who's next.