User blog:Dark Cyan/Animeme (text only) Rap Battles: Seize The Means Of Production vs Deus Vult

Hello, everyone. And welcome to Animeme (text only) Rap Battles! It's just like Animeme Rap Battles, but text only, and we didn't blow our budget on a terrible second season!

This is the battle of the subreddit memes on polar opposites of the political spectrum! representing alt-right, we have Deus Vult, and representing /r/communism, we have Seize The Means Of Production!

I wrote for Seize The Means Of Production, Legion wrote for Deus Vult.

Let's Do This!

Beat: Here

Deus Vult
(starts at 0:23)

Excuse me sir, have you heard the Good News?

This Eastern beast ought praise Allah before I give him his due

To the deuce with this dude, you are not properly attired

I’m merely Middle Aged, and you’re old, haggard and tired!

We will sack Constantinople! We will war like Stalingrad!

We will take Jerusalem and seize the means of kicking your ass!

Why are you a sad little Saracen? Sorry, that was my fault

For I burned Bernie with holy fire! Ave maria! Deus vult!

Seize The Means Of Production
(starts at 0:45)

Call me an Assassin, because I’m about to slay a Templar!

Bitch, you’re just the Latin version of Allahu Ackbar!

Alt-Right? That’s just another way of saying wrong!

Get on your knees in prayer, and suck my Communist dong!

You adopted a theme song, but have you even ever heard it played?

Sabaton’s ‘The Last Stand’ isn’t even about the fucking crusades!

Your memes, fans, birthplace and historical event? All trash!

Your glory pales to Mother Russia, and we’re gonna bash the Fash!

Deus Vult
(starts at 1:08)

Back, knave! You're sure to fall, let the contrast stick

Jesus Christ and Lionheart against Ballchinian and pigeon dick

Thee suck off Kim Jong-un as we liberate Antioch and Damascus

I suggest thee head to Mecca 'afore I leave thine head in a basket

Non nobis, Domine, non nobis, sed nomini tuo da gloriam!

But all thine machinations are to elevate a single, mortal man!

Think a comprehensive bibliography will convert me to thy creed?

Joke's on you, bitch, I was never taught how to read!

Seize The Means Of Production
(starts at 1:34)

I’m a figure of altruism, you of autism. Bare-faced barbarism!

T’is the age of Fully Automated Luxury Gay Space Communism!

While you’re killing in the name of religion in the Holy Land,

I’m being a real Christian, charitably liberating the common man!

Me? Frightened? I’d get a better fight from the Black Knight from Monty Python!

The future’s Red! Not even for genocide or ethnic cleansing will it whiten!

You’re just a war cry for bigots and ‘For Honor’ Knight teams!

Real memes will be remembered, and leave Marx on history!

WHO WON? Deus Vult Seize The Means Of Production