Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris battled Abraham Lincoln in Epic Rap Battles of History 3.

Verse 1:
This isn't Gettysburg punk, I'd suggest retreating.

For I invented rap music, when my heart started beating.

Chuck Norris doesn't battle, he just allows you to lose.

My raps will blow your mind, like the verbal John Wilkes Booth.

Verse 2
Grrrrrrrrrr, I AM CHUCK F*CKING NORRIS!

I spread more blood and gore than fourty-score on your puny civil war,

BITCH!

I split the union with a roundhouse kick.

I wear a blackbelt on the beard, that I grow on my dick!

I attack sharks, when I smell them bleed.

I don't go swimming, water just WANTS TO BE AROUND ME!

My fists make the speed of light WISH that it was faster.

You may have freed the slaves but Chuck is everyone's master!