Captain Kirk

"I'm the…enterprising captain, James Tiberius Kirk."

- Captain Kirk

Captain Kirk battled Christopher Columbus in Columbus vs Captain Kirk. He was portrayed by EpicLLOYD.

Information on the rapper
James Tiberius "Jim" Kirk is a character from the Star Trek franchise. He was born in Riverside, Iowa in the year 2233. He is the only student at Starfleet Academy to defeat the Kobayashi Maru test. He became the youngest captain when he was given command of the USS Enterprise.

Kirk and the Enterprise were commissioned to a five-year mission to chart and explore planets beyond the known Solar system, taking care not to meddle in the affairs of societies less developed than those in Federation space.

A brash and impulsive man by nature with an overwhelming sense of duty, Kirk often rushed to defend the peoples he came into contact with as threats arose against them, putting himself and his crew in the line of fire. He was also a notorious "skirt-chaser", often involving himself with female Federation crew members or natives that he had met during away missions. However, Kirk kept most of these women in a platonic relationship with him; his responsibilities to the Federation, his ship, and his crew always came first.

Nonetheless, Kirk possessed a strong motivation to do what was right, even if it meant breaking the rules.

Initially lost to history, Kirk was located in the the temporal rift called the Nexus by 24th-century Starfleet Captain Jean-Luc Picard and summoned to defend the planet Veridian III with Picard versus the tyrant Soran, who had been bent on causing its sun to explode and thereby obliterating the planet for his own ends. The two captains succeed in stopping the cataclysm, but Kirk falls in battle. Picard then lays him to rest on the planet's surface.

He was played most famously through three TV seasons (1966-1968) and seven feature films in the following 30 years by William Shatner. Although Shatner's portrayal of Kirk was made comical by a distinctive speech pattern of frequent pauses and oddly overemphasized syllables, it came to define the character as a fan favorite.

ERBoH Bio
I'm. Captain James Tiberius Kirk. Of the. USS Enterprise on the. Television show "Star Trek." I was. Portrayed by the ravishingly handsome William Shatner. Spoken word artist, ACTOR! And Spokesman for. Priceline.com. On Star Trek. Me and my crew of Spock, Sulu Scotty, Uhura, Chekov and Dr. "Bones" McCoy would. Hurdle through space from. Planet to. Planet. Meeting sexy women and fighting. For our lives against the. Evil Klingon villains. I recorded it all. On my. Captain's Log. It was. A. Glorious 79 episodes! The show went on. To be. Idolized and spawned five other TV shows and ELEVEN movies. My favorite. Of course! Was "Wrath of Khan," where I got to shout. "KAAAAAHHNNN!!!" I love acting that loud. I'll see you. In Space……..the FINAL frontier!

Verse 1
I'm the…enterprising captain, James Tiberius Kirk,

Representing Riverside Iowa, planet…Earth.

I…hear you call yourself an explorer, but I'm just not having it.

You…discovered a new world that was already inhabited!

Why don't you…boldly go somewhere you've never gone before?

Like India, or…any destination you've actually set sail for.

You spaghetti-eating fuck! How's your spice rack doing?

I'll be…chilling in my spaceship. Have fun canoeing.

Verse 2
Mr. Spock, beam me back to 1492 so I can beat this man like it's my job.

We'll see how Isabella likes my…captain's log.

It's…Kobayashi for you. There's no way you could win.

When your weak crew sees me approaching, they'll be like, "Dammit, it's Jim!"

I'll double-fist punch you, you slave-making bitch!

Now…take your genocidal ass off of my bridge.