User blog:The Flatwoods Monster/R-R-Rap Rat vs Suicidemouse.avi- Epic Rat Battles of Horror Off-Season

YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

So here we are. The Epic Rat Battles of Horror Season 2 has not quiiiite started yet and won't for a while, but until it does, here's an off-season. You CAN consider this a tribute to Epic Rap Battles of Creepypasta, but I'd really rather you didn't- Rap Rat, the cursed footage from the video board game of the same name, battles Suicidemouse.avi , the lost footage of Mickey Mouse, now cursed and... well... suicidal, to see which lost footage is best, and also, the classic battle of Rat vs Mouse! This battle WAS done by the ERBoCP, and it's pretty much the only decent one they've done (Except Smile Dog vs Mr Widemouth- That one wasn't terrible) and given my love for rats, I decided to re-do it WITHOUT the Real Chuck E. Cheese. Without further rambling, here's the battle.

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Cast:

How do I select a cast for this one?

Instrumental- Rat vs Suicidemouse.avi Instrumental

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EPIC RAT BATTLES OF HORRORRRRRR... (Off Season!)

RATARATARATA-RAP RAT! (Rap Rat!)

VS!

SUICIDEMOUSE.AVI!

BEGIN!

Suicidemouse.avi:

Hey, hey, kids, your favorite poet has spoken,

To destroy this opponent who doesn't even resemble a rodent-

Been at this since 1928, why you step to me is a mystery,

I'll clap-a-trap on Aparat, then you'll REALLY become history!

You've got an A in Attitude, but an F in everything else, wow!

You roll eyes so bad, they're at the bottom of my chin by now!

As I gaze apon this beady eyed version of a vermin that I'm versin,

I realize, rope in hand, that I have killed the wrong person

Rap Rat:

THE TERROR BEGINS! The battles Space Mountain, and I'm the star,

You've got two giant ears yet can't hear how awful your rhymes are!

I'm RATARATARATA RAP RAT! This battle's gonna be a quickie!

I'm witty! Who's The Stupidest? The answer isn't Hidden, Mickey!

You don't mess with found footage fest when you have to wait nine minutes for just a reaction,

I'm the best of the rest, while in order to face me, you need a game adaption!

Come this way, little mousey, it's not like I want to hurt you...

But I AM FEAR, and at 3:30 AM, APARAT WILL CURSE YOU!

(Beat slows down, as a clock ticking is heard. Screen zooms out to show the battle being watched on a video player, as the time zooms forward- The video players image turns black until the time mark hits nine minutes, and it fades back into Suicidemouse.avi, who slowly becomes bloodied)

Suicidemouse.avi (form 2):

Lately I've been hearing voices, TELLING ME TO KILL THIS DISSAPOINTMENT

SO STEP INTO MY CLUBHOUSE, AS THE RHYMES INFECT YOU LIKE RAT POISON!

Your rhymes are cheesy! Take it from me, you should kick the bucket!

You've got another man's finger up your ass, you glassy-eyed Finger Puppet!

Here's REAL Words of Warning- Mess with this Mouse and get a MASSACRE!

You're about as scary as the woman and children that you call Manufacturers!

And I don't give a rats ass if any demon curses me, cause here's something, kid

Send your Goofy-looking monster into MY room, FIND OUT WHAT REAL SUFFERING IS!

Rap Rat:

I'll wipe that smirk off your pale face when I leave my lyrical claw marks,

On this horrid and ugly kids icon who's more full of shit then his theme park!

I'll land a casualty on any fallacies who ever DARE to challange me!

I'll stomp you and smash you to Kingdom Come and hang you off a balcony!

Your whole story is such a bore, and your video? Wish I'd never seen them!

I'll clap your crap like a mouse trap and send you back to Animal Kingdom-

I'ma sue your town, bring your whole club-house down, don't try to diss me!

I'm the Real Big Cheese! Meanwhile, you were Abandoned by Disney!

Suicidemouse.avi:

Well, you're just-

Rap Rat:

WAIT YOUR TUUUUURN! You aren't finished being destroyed!

A character so insensitive, it's like you were made by a Couple of Cowboys!

Call me Felix the Cat, 'cause I just served ol' Walt another loss!

Don't mess with the big R! 'Cause I'm RAP RAT!

Monotone Announcer:

And He's the Boss...

WHO WON?

W-W-WHO'S NEXT?

Y-Y-Y-YOU DECIDEEEEE!

EPIC R-R-RAT! BATTLES OF! (APARAAAAT) HORROR!

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Who won? Rap Rat Suicidemouse.avi _________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________