User blog:Drakan95/Wirt and Greg vs Lewis and Clark. Epic Rap Battles: Cartoons vs History. Season 2

I shall write on my journal how great was this adventure...that's about writing a battle. So let's start this thing!

Hello everyone and welcome back to another Cartoons vs History bout; and oh my God, will I ever end those lame intros? Maybe, maybe not.

The story behind this work is quite interesting. I've received many times before Lewis and Clark vs Finn and Jake and I liked it for a moment. But then Flats came with this amazing idea and I was like: ''Hell yeah! Let's do this!''

Speaking of Flats, he's also guesting today as the cartoon side, so congratulate him as well for kicking my gluteus maximus. Also, this isn't the first battle, when our guest is writing for an Over The Garden Wall character, what do you know?

Credits time: HUGE thanks to Leandro for doing the title cards, cover and endslate as well HUGE thanks to IamtheNight for fixing a bit the lyrics.

The two travelling brothers from Over The Garden Wall, Wirt and Greg, and the 19th Century American explorers, Lewis and Clark, battle against each other to see which one of the two travelling duos who discovered animals/monsters not known to exist and led by a female native will come on top.

Wirt and Greg Background: The Unknown

Lewis and Clark Background: Mississippi River

Beat: Lost In Time

[Note: Wirt is denoted in red, Greg in purple , Greg's Frog in green , Beatrice in blue , Woodsman in grey, Lewis in brownish red , Clark in dark orange and Sacagawea in dark purple .]

Battle


BEGIN!

Wirt and Greg
(starts at 0:21)

Paging Doctor Cucumber! Croak! I need you for this great show!

To watch as I lay flows on lame foes like molasses on potatoes!

Greg! What have you gotten us into now? We can’t be foes with these!

We’re the whole package! They can’t compete! They’re undeserving of my poetry!

Lewis and who? I don’t recognize these two overgrown garden gnomes

Well maybe once they were important, but now their expedition mission is Unknown

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92ba-feb4-b486-b4050fab92a5" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#ff0000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">I could produce more rhythm than these racist brutes in suits with a broken flute,

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92bb-2ac0-c9b2-d96415e5fa89" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#9900ff;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">In hot pursuit to shoot these two Dora-the-Explorers the Boot!

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92bb-86d5-0ab1-e9840f6cd224" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#9900ff;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Education? Not for Lewis! He couldn’t spell until he was a late teen,

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92bb-bd66-0c24-1fc0170ef386" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#ff0000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">So you might as well thank me when I school you harder than Ms. Langtree

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92bc-c34d-0171-286c45d581c2" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#ff0000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">They discovered skunks. <span style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#9900ff;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Really? <span style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#ff0000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Yep. <span style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#9900ff;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">It sure shows, they stink!

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92bd-14f4-92aa-9b93dda739e6" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#ff0000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">The plot sinks: <span style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#434343;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Welcome to the Unknown, boys! You’re more lost than you think!

Lewis and Clark
(0:52)

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92bf-8d8b-4b9a-f89f80145a79" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#980000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Yo, William, look at that stripling in his silly Santa hat

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92bf-bb8d-271c-d172d9fe8e15" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#783f04;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Step back or we'll cut through Gravity Falls hacks like paths

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92c0-06f2-2868-947cfa286114" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#980000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Roar vicious as a grizzly bear, <span style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#783f04;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">you just can't match up to that!

We get as mad as a cut bullsnake if you challenge us in rap!

Let's show those scary stoats what happens if they mess with our guns

Since they were doomed to true darkness before this battle had begun

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92c1-cc65-21ba-ebf08a33673d" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#980000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">We've encountered many animals, <span style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#783f04;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">scarier than your Disney creature

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92c2-0383-cf26-06d46cab53b3" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#783f04;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">When we're done, <span style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#980000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">we'll throw your Corps in the Mississippi river

About time that our Father gave us a mission to fight brats in rhymes

And then we'll send Dopey and Bashful back to Snow White

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92c2-b66c-31a6-26b15d8f8c24" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#980000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Got the Goldeneye on you, to get through two kids so inept

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92c3-ed8e-e6df-8f4dfcd96181" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#783f04;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">By shoving Greg in a kettle, and Wirt can blow our clarinets!

Beatrice
(1:23)

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92c7-c1c2-84fe-8946cf43e630" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#0000ff;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Shut your traps! It’s a bad omen when this bluebird enters through your track,

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92c7-f5bb-71c1-21503d398348" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#0000ff;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">‘Cause she’ll rain wrath on two pushovers fast. You’ll die some day, and I’ll laugh!

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92c8-24cb-e1e8-9e6e1e4065de" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#0000ff;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">These coonskin cap wearing brats are Two Old Cats who need a class on how to rap

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92c8-5d8d-ab78-d8093b871084" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#0000ff;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Better watch where your shots are fired, I heard Clark is a real pain in the ass!

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92c9-e188-4af1-f1816be7d4d0" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#0000ff;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">We’re taking on Beasts! You’re too scared to square with Bears and fish!

<p dir="ltr" id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92ca-07e7-1768-e3a6ef0da1fb" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#0000ff;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">But a native teenage mother? Does Hancock know about the “Indian Affairs”!? <span style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#ff0000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">(Beatrice!)

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92ca-3388-d56a-56f78fdc0d90" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#0000ff;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Put you in an early grave next to the bits of your fame and this claimed fight,

<p dir="ltr" id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92ca-6613-8203-3b23fbdc254c" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#0000ff;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">So let’s hope at least the makers of your Tome can remember your names right!

Sacagawea
(1:44)

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92cc-d5fb-4a6f-966afb0163c2" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#4c1130;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">This Shoshone shall end Grumpy who just joined her fable crew

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92cd-5a47-9019-d9ac11617ae8" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#4c1130;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">I'll make this lil' bird feel so blue, when I'm through hunting you

<p dir="ltr" id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92cd-972d-15d5-a5c756fb05c9" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#4c1130;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">With my leading ability and vicious skills I stand taller

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92cd-c4e6-e5d5-40e600bbe2f0" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#4c1130;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Than your soft raps who aren't even worth a Sacagawea dollar

<p dir="ltr" id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92cd-ec53-d91c-bc81776357f9" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#4c1130;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Hunted down or shut up! The outcomes of a wild native brawl!

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92ce-0d49-9ebb-cab72bd72922" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#4c1130;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Then my baby will join the party and knock you Over The Garden Wall

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92ce-4962-f90d-042fa38b18a0" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#4c1130;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">No wonder you can't find your Dante with your birdie portrayal

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92ce-6938-de09-798756e94523" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#4c1130;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Silly Beatrice! You own flow worse than your betrayal!

Wirt, Greg and Beatrice
(2:05)

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92cf-ec8b-aced-8eb11711b74a" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#9900ff;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Ain’t that just the way? <span style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#4c1130;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;"> <span style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#ff0000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Wayward leaves akin to that of these failures fears,

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92d0-1cdf-ee04-941b2149e5c8" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#0000ff;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">My “betrayal” was for family, <span style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#4c1130;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;"> <span style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#ff0000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">while your genocidal ways paved the Trail of Tears

It was a grand adventure to unearth the truth, and now we unfold it

That your greatest discovery was how to cure a headache with a bullet!

Lewis, Clark and Sacagawea
(2:15)

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92d1-2987-3e11-29a94fc20119" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#980000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">We're renowned around the globe, while your show's a hoax

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92d1-4dba-b04b-ff068c765b41" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#783f04;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">After that, I'll write on my journal how we beat those Three folks

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92d1-6f2c-66ea-c6a497bd5715" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#4c1130;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Leave them as food for animals! I'm sure they'll beg for mercy

<span id="docs-internal-guid-739f442a-92d1-971e-20df-fac05a9bcd31" style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#980000;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">We've won our medallions! <span style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#9900ff;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;"> <span style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#783f04;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">That's the end of our journey!

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

EPIC RAP BATTLES: CARTOONS-

<span style="font-size:14.666666666666666px;font-family:Arial;color:#38761d;font-weight:400;font-style:normal;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;">Croak!

-VS HISTORY!!!

Poll
Who Won? Wirt,Greg and Beatrice Lewis, Clark and Sacagawea