User blog:MonkeyInATank/Charles Darwin vs Ash Ketchum

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!

CHARLES DARWIN!

VS!

ASH KETCHUM!

BEGIN!!!

Darwin:

A wild Darwin appeared and he's gonna kick your ass

You must be blind, you can't see anything in knee-high grass

I'm an English naturalist, the best there ever was

Black and White 2 were the same as the first, what's the fuss?

Natural selection says you'd better bring a good fight

You're just like a Lillipup, all bark and no bite

I'll freeze you with an Ice Beam, as cold as my raps flow

You're weak and scrawny, a real gym is where you should go

Ash:

My name is Ash Ketchum, you'd better catch my lyrics

Just like you caught heart disease, made you feel pretty sick

Your theory of evolution takes thousands of years

A Pokemon can evolve in a few levels, geezer!

Your studies kept you from ever having sex

You're useless, you can't put a finch on a Pokedex

Go, Pikachu, use your Thundershock!

If you think you're famous, you can suck my cock!

Darwin:

You hang out with a perverted black man and ginger virgin

I'm on the mic right now, my name is Charles Darwin

I did have sex, all my children just died young

I spit the craftiest things, your rhymes are poorly sung

You'll never get more hair than what's in my beard

You haven't hit puberty yet over 25 years!

Ash:

There's over 600 Pokemon and only one of you

They're all gonna help me now, whatcha gonna do?

I caught 'em all while you were ranting as slow as possible

I haven't seen more pussy since the Jubilife Cat Festival

Brock and Misty are my pals, all you had was your birds

You winning this thing is completely absurd