User blog:Doctor Mysterio/ERB WIKI WARRIORS PART 1: GENESIS

ERB Wiki Warriors Part 1: Genesis

(A small apartment is show as there is an alarm clock ringing)

Me: Ah… Another Day at the Office

(I get up and go to the bathroom and notice the toothpaste is almost empty)

Me: Ugh, I guess i’ll need to get some more

(I pick it up to get the last out of it until I notice a small label on the back)

Me: “Do not tear off this label or your life is at stake.”

(I tear it off… What?)

(A bunch of blue smoke starts to come around as large explosions start to cause my bathroom to smoke up)

Me: HELP ME, MY SATANIC TOOTHPASTE IS SMOKING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Outside the Hallway)

Kid: Mommy what is that? Mom: Get away Charlie, Get Away!

(A giant genie that for some reason has an uncanny resemblance to Teslaman comes out of the toothpaste tube)

Tesla: I am the genie! here to

Me: What the… Tesla, why the heck were you in my toothpaste?!

Tesla: I AM NOT TESLA! I am a mystical and powerful!.... okay it’s me..

Me: Why were you in my toothpaste?

Tesla: Because all of the lamps were taken okay?

Me: So are you going to give me my three wishes?

Tesla: What?

Me: My Three Wishes!

Tesla: Uh I don’t exactly have any wishes but I do have a prophecy to tell you about-

Me: Why are you a genie then?

Tesla: “Genie” just sounds cool dude!

Me: So why are-

Tesla: ENOUGH WITH THE YOU TALKING!

Me: Okay Okay! So what is this prophecy?

Tesla: A mysterious force known as The Gauntlet of Time gave the universe 7 mysterious scrolls that could lead to the ultimate power that could either bring great harmony or great destruction to our world.

Tesla: But there is a man known as “The Marauder” who wants to use these scrolls to gain access for world destruction and only a group of mighty warriors can stop them.

Me: Wow! this sounds like a daring and dangerous adven-

Tesla: Cosplaying as their favorite character.

Me: What?!

Tesla: Look I didn’t write this…

(I point to a typewriter in the corner with Tesla’s name on it and he pushes it aside)

So will you and your friends take on this challenge in order to save the world Mister Mysterio?

Me: I will do it!

Tesla: Excellent… Now I shall head back into my toothpaste tube! (Tesla heads back into the tube in lots of smoke)

Me: I guess i should call up some people…

(The Next Day)

(Alanomaly is happily walking on the street)

Random Dude: Hey pal, why do you look so happy?

Alanomaly: I just won a free boat!

(Alanomaly shows the random dude a poorly written note on a napkin saying “Come to 666 Cheese Street in Apt -12 for a FREE BOAT!”)

Random Dude: So do you boat a lot then?

Alanomaly: Nope, I just love free stuff!

(Alanomaly happily walks away to the apartment building and goes inside) Alanomaly: Free boat here I come… WHAT THE HECK?! (A bunch of irritated and grouchy looking ERB wiki users are all in my living room)

Gravity: Sit down Alan

Alanomaly: But I-

Night Falcon: THERE IS NO FREAKING BOAT!

(Alanomaly sits down crestfallen as I enter in a maroon bow tie)

Me: Greetings my fellow users of ERB Wiki and-

TK: GET HIM!!!!

(All of the angry users charge at me)

Me: “girly scream”

(Brief montage of me getting beaten up, punched, kicked, elbow slammed, and piledrived by different users)

Valhalla: BRING OUT THE CHILI SKYDIVING!

(Skydiving brings out a giant pot of hot chili while Matoro pours extra hot sauce in it)

Purple: Enjoy the Chili, Biatch!

Me: Wait Let me explain

Alanomaly: Why did you trick us Myst?

Hawkeye: I wanted a free boat!

Joe: Why am I here?

Me: OK guys just sit down and let me talk

Valhalla: Okay… Skydiving go pour out the Chili

(Skydiving sadly walk away with the Chili)

Me: Look everyone, I got a weird message from my toothpaste tube and- SIT DOWN!

(Everyone is trying to reach the door until I shouted)

Me: It told me that me and a certain amount of friends (fellow users) need to cosplay as their favorite character to save “The Gauntlet of Time” from some evil yaa hoo.

Stahlix: Wait, so why isn’t there every user on the Wiki?

Me: Well, WonderPikachu had to go fight video game monsters

(Cut to Wonder fighting off giant Donkey Kong hybrids with lasers)

Wonder: Ha! Pixels did it better than you!

Random Guy: No they didn’t

Wonder: I know…

(Cut back to me)

Me: ERBofSmoshery was climbing Mt. Everest

(Cut to ERBofSmoshery on Everest)

ERBofSmoshery: Yes my friends! I will climb this mountain or my name isn’t-

(Rope snaps)

ERBofSmoshery: NOT AGAIN!

(Cut back to me)

Me: And Loygansono was doing something big as what he told me

(Cut to Loygansono watching Doctor Who)

Loygansono: What? This is very important... I’m watching “The Day of the Doctor” for god’s sake!

(Cut back to me and the users, then Jella comes in)

Jella: Free boat here I come-

TK: Sit!

Jella: aw…

(Jella sits down with the others)

Me: Now look everyone, We were called by this special “toothpaste force” in order to save the world. Not anyone else but us and I feel like it’s our duty to-

Hawkeye: He-He… Doody…

Me: NO “WRECK-IT RALPH” REFERENCES!, Anyway I feel like it’s our calling to do this sensational adventure with my closest friends.... So will you join me in this battle to save the world?!

(Everyone still looks pissed)

Me: I will give you each 5 dollars

Everyone: OK!

Me: Now come back tomorrow morning with your choice of cosplay and meet me at my apartment!... now get out…

(Everyone starts to leave until)

TK: Hey can I use your-

Me: Bye!

(Slams door)

(I walk to my bedroom closet and find my tweed jacket and maroon bow-tie) Me: This is gonna be fun…