User blog:Stevesbeans/Epic Rap Battles Of Fiction Mid-Season Finale: Scott Pilgrim Vs. Natsuki Subaru

Well, looks like we made it, the mid season finale, which no one will proably read lol (anyone know any other good sites for posting this stuff?) Anyway, NEETs who must run through gauntlets for their questionable lover. (BTW, The brown in Scotts verses are the announcer, bolded means everyone is singing) Let's get into it...















Battle
Epic Rap Battles Of Fiction!



VS...



Begin!

Scott Pilgrim:

Messing with Scott? Man you gotta pay the price!

Cause I’ll put you on ice, jin and tonic ice….iced Jin and tonics!

You’re really bad at this! Kim, you can go!

You’re gonna need this bud   Scott Earned the Power of Flow!

+4 to lyrics

+5 to guts

+11 to light novels read.

Escaped from death but can’t escape toxic romance!

You could redo this 10 times over and you’d still have no chance!

You get so many bail outs, you may as well be stuck in jail!

I’m crucsh-ing you with my rhymes, you can call me the white whale!

I’m the best on the provenance, your equivalent to a farmer!

I’ve got the power of love, you’ve got the power of plot armour!

Natsuki Subaru ​​:

I’ll win this fight, that’s a guarantee!

Your as batshit as Betleguesse to face Emilias knight nominee!

Scott Pilgrim:

Emilia's nominee? Fucking please.

You were screaming at her like she owed you money!

Natsuki Subaru:

That’s…totally not right?

That’s, like, bait and I’m not gonna bite…

Scott Pilgrim:

Doesn’t matter when your only powers a curse!

What’s the witch gonna do? Help you write a decent verse?

Demolished in the first round! Now take your time and reflect!

Cause right outta the gate… Scott Wins! Perfect!

Natsuki Subaru: 

(Oh shit! What the hell am I going to do? He completely destroyed me out there, just fall back…fall back…fall back! That’s it)

Hey reeeeeeeeeem, can you come help me with something?

Subaru, do I have to do everything for you? Heheheh.

Rhyming fast with stamina, maximised my anima!

Rhymes more frozen over then your homeland of…Canadaia? Canada.

You’re the white whale? I made that thing drop dead!

Not chance stacking up against us! You can’t clash this demons head!

The way you put down Knives? Even the witch cult lacks the cruelness!

Your so far up yourself, we may as well be fighting Julius!

From Patel to Gideon, your all just the same!

I see your future with Ramona: '''PLAYER 2 HAS LEFT THE GAME! '''

Scott Pilgrim:

Oh shit, what?! That’s not correct…

At least, I don’t need someone else to unlock the power of self respect! RECOVERY!

I didn’t sign up for seconds, but, really dude,

your sister would ask the same, “Who the fuck even are you?”

As far as I see, you make a pretty toxic team.

You swarm around him like disease, who’s the real witchfiend?

Expect to top Scott, when you couldn’t best Academia?

Piss off water bottle, he’d rather rap with Emilia!

Natuski Subaru and Rem:

Make like Ramona and fade away! She sent your whole life through a helix!

Trying to guilt with the confession? That’s a bigger trap than Felix!

You beating me? Your threats are as empty as your brain capacity!

Your roommate gets it on the reg! You’re wearing subspace chastity!

Women are your cough medicine, you use them as a souther!

Meanwhile, you’re a cruiser, loser, emotional abuser…

With a raging superiority complex, thinking you are flawless!

In rap, you sex bo-bomb harder than you did a the box office!

Scott Pilgrim:

(BOOM!) KO! (Scott slowly fades away as we cut to him in subspace.)

Ahh, I’m…so alone…well, there goes my self esteem…

You’re not alone, you’re just having some idiotic dream.

Don’t even think for a second, you have the choice to quit!

Get back out there Scott, we all know you can do it.

(Scott snaps awake) Scott Earned the Power of self respect!

+100 to self confidence

+12 to guts

+15 to will

Scott Pilgrim:

Neet lines but as far as I see…

​​​​​​​ I’m only rapping against Waifu bait and Kirito on speed.

​​​​​​​ Got a confident façade, but your whole lives a scrimmage!

​​​​​​​ Blazing burns hotter than the ones in Rems village!

​​​​​​​ Gave her the cold shoulder, may as well call you puck!

​​​​​​​ Chasing after Satan? Man, you just plain suck!

​​​​​​​ You mirrored my story, fighting way above your class!

​​​​​​​ Except this time the purple man turned around and kicked your ass.

​​​​​​​ Stuck in a world where you suck the most, reality mirrors fiction!

​​​​​​​  Claim you don’t want to die but face Scott? That’s a comic contradiction.

​​​​​​​ Just go another 2 episodes without showing up, I’d rather fight your twin!

​​​​​​​ Subarus gonna have to start from zero when I cave his face in!

Natuski Subaru and Rem:

W-well, I certainly wasn’t expecting that.

N-No, kidding, he totally trounced our attack.

To beat this guy, we’ll need a third man

so with that, could anyone lend a hand?

.........................

I'll do it!

Natuski Subaru, Rem and Reinhard Van Astrea:

Expect to stack up to the sword saint when you lost to Vegans with psychokinesis?

I’m fire on this track, call it blessing of the phoenix!

Too fast for you, Scott, slicing you with holy lines!

Between your smarts and your employment, your bank accounts under stillness of an objects time!

Though your vile, senseless actions seem hard to digest!

We’re killing on this beat, call us demonically possessed!

This isn’t a royal search, and that’s rightfully Emilias crown!

Sigh You fight through minor leagues like a lamer Travis Touchdown!

Dude you’re gross! Jumping at the youngest opportunity!

Your missing all your lines, call it attack immunity!

Your rotten attitude and self pity are your only claims to fame!

But I’ll take you off the shelf as if you were your game!

(Suddenly, the a massive explosion erupts from the side of all participants and we hear a guitar strumming. It seems like it's gonna be sex-bob omb but Scott shrugs As the dust fades, we see a young boy standing over the rubble...it pans over and we see...)



Naota Nandaba:

Crashing into this battle like a vespa, sup?

Guess I’m fighting two adults who don’t know how to grow up!

Got the flame of Mamimi, infused with atomisks power!

I roxy the mic, this is Naotas finest hour!

Let’s start with the Car brand! Dressing like Emiyas biggest fan!

I’m rocking on toonami, you can’t even get out of japan!

Cause it seems he’s carrying emotional baggage!

My guitar causes damage! You couldn’t read regardless of the language!

She showers you in affection, yet all you do is manipulate…

by staying defensive and stationary, I thought you’d broken your gate?

While I’m acting an anime alternative, doing Progressive right!

All you’ve got is no season 2, and light novels your authors too lazy to write!

A 5/10 anime and a box office bomb face my surrealist masterpiece?

I’ll hang a maid on the track, you can call me Betleguesse!

Rems just walking fanservice, chasing Subaru like a pullet!

I shoot rhymes smooth, your firing brittle bullets!

This Knights fame seems to rise! As his grandmas legacy shrinks!

Oh, who’s this tall drink of water? You know I don’t like sour drinks!

Serving the royals looking like Kirito and Beakers fusion!

You’ve trapped yourself in the hero bubble, Blessing of delusion!

Just like every relationships he’s been in, Scott should’ve withdrew!

Yout canti-ven beat me in your dreams, where your girlfriends cucking you!

Yet I’ll read you like Betty, my world would take you for a whirl!

Ramona left you with a flash, like a glorified high-school girl!

As for your power of understanding, I had stronger things come from my head, what’s that about?

Nothing can happen till you swing the bat but you both struck out!

Who Won?

'Who's Next? '

You'll See!

'Epiccccccccccccccccccc... Rap Battttttttttles Of (Witches Arms crawl over the logo before crushing it like Subarus heart) Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiction! ' Who Won? Scott Pilgrim Natsuki Subaru (W/Rem and Reindhard) Naota Nandaba