Talk:James Bond vs Austin Powers/@comment-24059316-20160612211539

Modern Bond: I've beef with le chiffre and know a blofeld with a cheek scar

But they were not as crooked and as rotten as your teeth are

I'll go balls to the wall-ther on this wack twat in an ascot

blast shots at ya like ass from the back slot of a fat scot

permission from the crown to put a scoundrel down? I've earned it

I'm licensed to kill, you couldn't get a learner's permit

After twenty four films I'm still reaching new heights

Your third movie died; guess you only live twice

Spell my name! Ladies wanna B-on-D!

Any sex appeal you might have is beyond me!

I'm the ????? from my head to my toe and after this flow I'm done

I only need one round *gunshot* Golden Gun



Austin: You look a lot more blond in your movie baby

That's alright, lets just keep it groovy baby!

(Yeah!) Basil Exposition told me this'd be boring

<p style="font-weight:normal;">But jesus, man, even my mojo's snoring

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I've never seen such a miserable spy

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I've also never seen a man with glistening thighs

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I mean you can't shag ????? with that waxed ????

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Birds flock to the musk of my chest furs

<p style="font-weight:normal;">(Yeah!) Let me entice you with a little striptease

<p style="font-weight:normal;">And then judo chop, I'm swinging on you like the sixties!

<p style="font-weight:normal;">(yeah!) you're defenseless since my raps can't be deflected,

<p style="font-weight:normal;">you're like all the sex i've ever had: unprotected!

<p style="font-weight:normal;">(yeah!) people want a hero with a little personality

<p style="font-weight:normal;">noone wants to sit through your gritty reality

<p style="font-weight:normal;">maybe q could craft some new plot lines

<p style="font-weight:normal;">you made thunderball two bloody times!

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I'm one of a kind, you're always getting remade

<p style="font-weight:normal;">you can't touch me, double oh behave!

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<p style="font-weight:normal;">Modern Bond: I can't believe I'm wasting my time with this clown

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I should be on an island with a fucking model by now

<p style="font-weight:normal;">sipping dry martinis and peeling off bikinis

<p style="font-weight:normal;">not rapping against swedish penis pumping weenies (no, that's not mine)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I didn't say I was finished! I'm sick of your silly gimmicks

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I'm the best spy in the business, just ask all the critics!

<p style="font-weight:normal;">and I've been through hell, so yeah, I'm a bit of a cynic,

<p style="font-weight:normal;">but i'm the original model that your frilly arse mimics!

<p style="font-weight:normal;">

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Connery Bond: I wouldn't exactly call you original...

<p style="font-weight:normal;">It's the most prominent dominant bond spy so pay homage

<p style="font-weight:normal;">handing out ass whoopings, I'm on some real james bond-age

<p style="font-weight:normal;">your performance doesn't stir me, and I'm certainly not shaken

<p style="font-weight:normal;">if I wanted shitty acting in my action film I'd go and watch Taken

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I see your modern gadgets and I piss on them all!

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I don't need a q, to break your balls

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I'm the grandad of the brand millions of fans have been sold on

<p style="font-weight:normal;">You're so far up on my nuts I should call you Bond: gold bond

<p style="font-weight:normal;">

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Austin: Yeah, um, could I get back in my rap please?

<p style="font-weight:normal;">

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Connery Bond: Rap these, you velvety hack!

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<p style="font-weight:normal;">Austin: Jeez!

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<p style="font-weight:normal;">Modern Bond: It's the movie business and you've had your six

<p style="font-weight:normal;">The world has had quite enough rug wearing mysogynists

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<p style="font-weight:normal;">Austin: Yeah, to be honest, you are a bit rapey

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I mean I like to swing but Dr.No-means-no baby

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<p style="font-weight:normal;">Connery Bond: Oh, please, I'm an extraordinary gentleman, I'm distinguished!

<p style="font-weight:normal;">If they made a mini-me they'd have to cast Peter Dinklage!

<p style="font-weight:normal;">

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Modern Bond: Or maybe they'd cast a Bond who's actually English

<p style="font-weight:normal;">*gunshot*

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Connery Bond: Why, pussy, aren't you the cunning linguist?

<p style="font-weight:normal;">

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Modern Bond: As a matter of fact I've got a knack for licking old cunts

<p style="font-weight:normal;">After I beat you I'll kick the shit out of the man who does your stunts

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<p style="font-weight:normal;">Connery Bond: Now you listen here, you little duck-faced runt!

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I'm all in! I'm ready to die any day that you want!

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