User blog:Loygansono55/Epic Rap Battles of What the Fuckiversary

Salutations, one and all! Fiyah and I are pleased to present to you a very special battle to commemorate the anniversary of Epic Rap Battles of What the Fuck, even though we're more than 2 months late! Sit back, relax, and enjoy this atrocity :)

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF WHAT THE FUCK! (ANNIVERSARY!)

WAX TADPOLE!

VERSUS!

LOYGO'S NIPPLES!

BEGIN!

Wax Tadpole:

You're back for more? Well, I spit like silk,

I'll cut you up and drink the blood and milk!

Nobody sucks you! You're too hairy, and ugly as well,

I'mma burn you with my candle and then you can burn in hell!

Loygo's Nipples:

Give up now! You'll never become a frog!

You're better off drowning yourself in a bog!

These nipples are erect, spitting cold with lots of class,

You know what you can kiss?

...

MY ASS!

Wax Tadpole and Loygo's Nipples quickly turn around to reveal every past ERBoWTF rapper.

Cleverbot:

CumBucketBunny still thinks he can win? The answer is never,

Because I'm clashing this clingy clitoris with a cleaver, so clever!

Mr. Cumbunny:

I'll spunk all over this funkless punk with no junk,

That's MR. CumBucketBunny to you, Evie, you lunk!

Tenth Doctor:

It's Journey's End for these idiots, the End of Time, if you will!

Cleverbot shoots the Tenth Doctor with a gun or something.

I don't want to go, but it looks like I've been killed...

The Tenth Doctor regenerates into the Eleventh Doctor.

Eleventh Doctor:

Or not! I'll choke you with a bow tie, they're cool, you know,

I'mma shit all over you shits like geronimo!

Doctor 10:

I'm still the best Wiki meme, the best thing by Lasse,

But here comes Doctor 9, so don't be getting sassy!

Doctor 10 degenerates into Doctor 9.

I arrived in time to shoot disses so fine,

I say no to your raps, I'm like Doctor NEIN!

Queef:

I came out to give you all an embarrassing defeat,

Tell it to 'em, Man Queef, we just can't be beat, neat!

Man Queef:

You said it, Queefy baby, we're the champions of rap,

If you can actually queef, you deserve a clap clap clap!

Smeel:

If you feel that you can appeal the smeel, then you aren't for real,

Now to steal this steel hard rap is girl me, I'mma split like a banana peel!

Girl Smeel:

Pussy farts are gross, so you guys are nasty little things,

People love us, we are the sex fetish queens and kings!

Fart:

Letting it rip on the mic like a Beyblade!

I don't help people get laid, but I sure get chumps played!

You can't rank against me, I'll go in your cereal as a prank,

I enjoy to plank, but anyways, you cannot beat this ass stank!

AWC:

You and me aren't friends anymore, your raps are utter poo,

ERB Wiki likes me BECAUSE AWCS HAVE USER RIGHTS TOO!

His Friend:

Now it's personal, I'm the one who killed your goldfish!

So just get out, your suggestions are very old-ish!

Psy:

You think you can win again, quack head? Well, you are wrong,

When I'm through with you, you'll be even more dead than my song!

Go and evolve again, I don't care, it won't help you, maybe,

I see a woman over there! HEEEEEEEEY, SEXY LADY!

Psyduck:

You must be having a Hangover if you think you can win,

This Gangnam prick is gonna get gangbanged in the chin!

Psyduck evolves into Golduck.

Golduck:

My Water Gun'll make you gone when I squirt you with my flow,

You'll never get the sexy ladies cause you got a small dick, oh!

A:

Aaaayyy, it's A coming in to play, yay!

And now I'm here to ruin all your A1 days!

1:

Uno, dos tres, YOUR number is up!

You're all negative, I'm prime, simple as one, two, three, yup!

Circle:

You can stick your dick in me, but I'm not fucking around,

I am the best shape and thing ever to be found!

Justice League:

Superman:

Shooting laser beams, I'm the man of your dreams! (Green Arrow: SHIIIIIIIIIIIT!)

Wonder Woman:

I'll go HAM on this spam, we're the greatest hero team! (Aquaman: YES!)

Martian Manhunter:

Marvin can suck my dick, I'm the best Martian!

Batman:

My parents might be dead, but- damn it! You made me cry!

Flash:

I'm the Flash, honey, getting cash money when I dash-runny!

Green Lantern:

It's all over, you're doney! Your chance of winning is noney!

Spam:

I-

''Before Spam has a chance to rap, Superman eats him all up. Tasty.''

Ice Cube:

It's been over a year, and I'm still cold as an iceberg!

I'll start a fire with your dead bodies! Toasty, you spergs!

Smoky:

When you start fires, you better pay the price, see?

Nobody loves you, except maybe that user Icey!

Google+:

You hear me, 1? You ain't got a big plus like mine,

And Circle can lick my entire cosine! Now my YouTube partner'll spit a rhyme!

YouTube:

Buffer this, Bobs! Feel my entire video length!

Subscribe for more faggots being crushed by my strength!

Bob Army:

We are the vice of the internet, and we want you gone!

Like things were in 2006, YouTube, when nothing was wrong!

FireBob:

Sorry, army, but I gotta go step out,

I got some business to go about!

Playstation 4:

I'm the platform people adore, more consumers want da Four!

So prepare to hit the floor when I come packed with exclusives galore!

Xbox One:

Xbox marks the spot, the spot where I'll kick your rear!

There's only one winner of this battle, it's this console right here!

Wii U:

OH MAN, IT'S TIME FOR NINTENDO'S MAIN THING TO GET SHIT DONE!

AND LIKE I SAID TWICE LAST BATTLE, I GIVE KIDS MOTHERFUCKING FUN!

Virtual Boy:

Red's the colour you'll be seeing when I'm through slayin',

Try to play me? Ha! You'll end up with a migraine!

Vance:

You don't stand a chance, Vance is here to dance,

Stab you with a lyrical lance, au revoir's what they say in France!

Dreamcast:

Bro, when you fight me, you'll be like Tom Hanks, Dream-Castaway!

Try to scrap against Sega's god? Then you'd better pray and pray!

Atari 2600:

Quiet, you damn kids! get off my lawn, I just had that grass sprayed!

If it weren't for me, none of you stupid noobs would have been made!

Mercury:

My singer died of AIDS, which made sad for days,

I had some tasty Lays, and then I watched some plays!

Venus:

Disintegrating you with my acid rain flow,

You think that you'll triumph, but you'll receive a lot of pain, though!

Earth:

I'm worth the most because I've got surf and turf,

I got my own Google app, you don't even have to search!

Moon:

I'm back to moon you chumps again, so lie down and bask,

In my glory, or I'll crash on you like I'm Majora's Mask!

Mars:

Mars! The greatest in our whole Galaxy!

I'll drive you out of here so fast like this is Crazy Taxi!

Jupiter:

Duping ya, it's Jupiter! Man, just look at ya,

A bunch of little pebbles compared to this playah!

Saturn:

Bitches, look at me, I'm the most fabulous planet you'll ever see,

God is a Single Lady because he liked me and put a ring on me!

Uranus:

Hey, fuck you, Saturn! I hope you haven't forgotten,

The time I beat you up in the playground, why you rotten...

Neptune:

King of the water, including the salty tears that you will sob,

This is even easier than my Frycook Contest on Spongebob!

Pluto:

I'm the farthest away because I can't stand you guys,

Everything you say is a lie, so go and die!

Astronomer:

My raps are astronomically not a piece of crud!

Much better than all you clumps of rock and mud!

Sun:

I'm the centre of attention here, that's why you all circle me,

I'm the sun, but I'm your daddy, beating you the Milky Way!

Kurt:

I'm not keeping it peaceful, mess with Kurt and you get hurt,

Just look at my cult, I'm better than all you turds!

Atul:

Oh look, it's the unmemorable Mexican chump,

There's a new cameo god, and his name's Lump!

Wreck-It Ralph:

I'm more dandy than King Candy, I've also got some pretty big hands, eh?

I will smash you like I'm the Hulk, cause I'm no pansy!

Fix-It Felix Jr.:

I can fix it better than the Bob in that army,

But there's one thing I can't fix: your rhymes that are so barmy!

Shrek:

I told you, get out of my swamp, and I mean it,

Because right now, I have to take a fat ogre shit!

Puss in Boots:

Actually, that's not my name now, I switched to sneakers,

My raps are so good, I play them with my nice speakers!

Stephen King:

It's not Pennywise to fight me, all you horse ladies,

I published a great new book, it's called Mr. Mercedes!

Jack Torrance:

I'm sad, I'm not allowed to be in Jack the Ripper vs Hannibal Lecter,

I don't like Pinkie and her friends either, I really do not respect her!

Pinkie Pie:

This King is getting overthrown, I rock hard like Maud,

Even Celestia hears your raps and groans, oh my god!

Mane Six:

Don't mess with the Equestria Girls, or you will pay,

We have the Elements of Harmony! Will you win? Neigh!

Groose:

Cawlin and Stritch are my bitches, I am manly!

Gaston is the worst, ask any Tom, Dick, or Stanley!

Gaston:

You're really trying to step to me again?

LeFou:

Oh, sheesh!

Gaston:

That's even crazier than all the shit said by Maurice!

Ghirahim:

Forte was a better villain than you!

And he was bolted to the wall! Oh, and fuck you, Groose!

Wario:

Just had our battle, this will make you so proud, ma!

We're gonna win again, right, bro?

Waluigi:

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Meatholl:

lol are you guys seriously still doing this?

Meatholl will teach you a lesson, you're the ones I'll be doing, yes!

Wax Tadpole:

What?

AAAAAHHHHH!

WHAT'S HAPPENING?!

Loygo's Nipples:

OH NO!

NOT NOW!

SHIT!

All:

Dafuq?

Wax Tadpole burts into flames, revealing Firebrand, who walks out.

Bob Army:

BOB, WHY?!

The rest of Loygansono materialises around his nipples, then he pulls his shirt down, covering them.

Loygo:

You ready, Fiyah?

Fiyah:

Aw yeah, bby!

Loygo:

The creators have arrived, so nipples, be quiet!

We were making love in chat only to be disturbed by this riot!

Fiyah:

Seriously, I had to get out of my flame to shut you pussies up!

We were just about to get to the part where Loygo Jizzes in the cup!

Loygo and Fiyah begin to magically erase each of the rappers.

Loygo:

You said it, Lexi! Let's show these guys that when things get messy-

Fiyah:

Unlike AWC and His Friend, we actually ARE besties!

Loygo and Fiyah:

Before we finish you once and for all, we have just one thing to say,

You've just been destroyed by Barry McInnes and Alex Day!

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

HERP DE DERP!

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF WHAT THE FUCK!

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Fiyah:

So, now what?

Loygo:

We're the only ones left.

Fiyah:

Then that means... we must settle this.

Loygo:

I suppose it does.

Fiyah:

Well then.

Loygo:

Let's do this!

Fiyah:

You're going down, you sexy thing!

Loygo:

We'll see about that!

TO BE CONTINUED!

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AT SOME POINT!

Who won? Wax Tadpole Loygo's Nipples Cleverbot Mr. Cumbunny Tenth and Eleventh Doctors Doctors 10 and 9 Queef and Man Queef Smeel and Girl Smeel Fart AWC His Friend Psy Psyduck and Golduck A 1 Circle Justice League Spam Ice Cube Smoky Google+ and YouTube Bob Army Playstation 4 Xbox One Wii U Virtual Boy Vance Dreamcast Atari 2600 Mercury Venus Earth Moon Mars Jupiter Saturn Uranus Neptune Pluto Astronomer Sun Kurt Atul Wreck-It Ralph and Fix-It Felix Jr. Shrek and Puss in Sneakers Stephen King and Jack Torrance Mane Six Groose Gaston and LeFou Ghirahim Wario and Waluigi Meatholl Loygo and Fiyah