User blog:Pirate Princess7/Spelled Bar. Episode Two: Maria's Wolfman

If you missed episode one, you can read it here: http://epicrapbattlesofhistory.wikia.com/wiki/User_blog:Pirate_Princess7/Spelled_Bar:_Pilot

Episode Two : Maria’s Wolfman

{We see the conversation that Miranda and Maria had in the last episode but instead of hearing them talk, we hear Maria’s narration}

[ I met a werewolf tonight and now he knows that I'm not normal. Crap. . . What am I gonna do about it? Miranda is so paranoid, at least I hope she is. Damn, what am I gonna do?]

---

{The morning after, Miranda walks down the stairs and into her and Maria’s kitchen. She sees Maria making pancakes.}

Maria: Good morning, sunshine.

Miranda: What are you doing?

Maria: Making breakfast. How many do you want?

Miranda: *reaching for cereal* I think I'll pass, I don't know what's in them.

Maria: I know how to make pancakes, there's instructions on the box.

Miranda: And how is that supposed to make me feel better? Remember when I gave you instructions on how to make the cupcakes for the town’s “Feed the Homeless Charity Week” and you decided to end your little “special ingredient”?

Maria: That was in 6th grade!

Miranda: You gave half the town food poisoning.

Maria: Why can't you just--

{Maria is interrupted when the doorbell rings}

Miranda: I'll get it.

{Miranda walks over to the door to find a worried/panicked Olivia}

Miranda: Liv what’s wrong?

Liv: Have you talked to Tyler?

Miranda: No, why?

{Maria walks in the living room from the kitchen having no idea of the conversation the Liv and Miranda were just having}

Maria: Liv! Come on in. I made pancakes.

Liv: No offense, but the last time I ate your cooking, I couldn't go to school for a week.

Maria: *mumbles* That was in 6th grade.

Liv: Anyways, I don't know where he is. I called him, but he didn't answer, so I went over to his house, and he wasn't there.

Miranda: How do you know Tyler wasn't there?

Liv: He gave me a key for…..something, so I used it to…..

Maria: Ohhh man. You and Ty…….

Liv: Hey! You have no place to judge who I hook up with!

Maria: Alright, I'll give you that.

Miranda: That's besides the point. Why come to us? We aren't exactly close to Tyler.

Liv: But you're his boss. He's gotta answer the phone for you.

Maria: She's got a point. Why don't I call him?

Liv: I'd rather Miranda call him.

Maria: Of course you would. Alright Miranda, go ahead.

Miranda: Fine. *pulls out phone and dials in Ty’s number, phone rings*

{On the phone}

Ty: *talks weakly* Miranda, what's wrong?

Miranda: Well, that's why I called you. You kinda just called yesterday saying that you were sick, but that's it. What's wrong, Ty?

Ty: Nothing. I just have to go. I won't be in today.

Miranda: Ty, c’mon, what's wrong?

Ty: I don't know. Ok! I wish I could tell you, but I can't. Oh my god, why does it burn!?!? I just wanna go home.

Miranda: Ty, where are you?

Ty: My own personal hell. Miranda I need your hel--

{Phone call ends}

Miranda: Tyler? Tyler?!? Shit.

Liv: Where is he?

Miranda: I don't know, but he needs our help.

Liv: Then let's go.

Miranda: But, what about the bar? We have to--

{Maria interrupts}

Maria: I got it. I mean, it's Tuesday, the slowest day. I'll open later and close earlier. It'll be fine.

Miranda: You sure?

Maria: Yeah. I got my own help.*speaks lower so Liv won't hear* Plus I gotta meet our Wolfman.

Miranda: Your Wolfman and fine. *speaks in normal voice; starts to grab her sweater and purse* Be careful.

Maria: I will.

Liv: Thank you so much, Maria.

Maria: No problem.

{Miranda and Liv start to head out the door}

Miranda: Maria, call me if you need anything.

Maria: I will. Go find Tyler.

---

{We see Maria at the closed bar getting ready to open. She does several things such as cleaning the tables and the bar, and also taking the chairs down. As she cleans/gets ready, we hear her narrating.}

[ Olivia was always the popular girl. She was a year below me and Miranda but the kids in our grade would still talk about her. I remember her in high school. What a slut. I mean, I guess she's grown up, but still, if you take all the people I've hooked up with and times it by at least three, that's how many people she's hooked up with. Oh well. I mean, she's not great at making drinks, but she's one hell of a waitress. Maybe it has something to do with her long, curly blonde hair, hourglass figure, and her DD cup size. Hmm, maybe that's why we hired her.]

{Maria looks at her watch}

Maria: I guess it's time to open.

{Maria flips the sign from “Closed” to “Open” and we jump forward about an hour or two to see the bar seemingly filled with people and Maria is just about losing it, it's around 7-8 pm. We see the towns assholes in the bar at a table.}

Brandon: Umm, miss, where are my onion rings?

Maria: I'll get them. I'll get them.

Voice: You sure? We asked for them like 20 minutes ago.

Legion: Yeah, it doesn't take that long to fry onions.

Hawkeye: Olivia doesn't take this long, where's she?

Maria: That's really none of your business. She's dealing with something.

{Maria starts to walk back to the bar when she's interrupted by someone behind her.}

Man: Do you want any help tonight miss?

Maria: That would be great. Can you-- *turns around to see that it was the wolfman* No.

Wolfman: You should really give me a chance. I act like a real dick two to three days before the full moon. It's a wolf thing.

Maria: I know it's a wolf thing, but I still don't want your help.

Wolfman: You did just a second ago before you saw it was me.

Maria: Leave me alone. I don't know you.

Wolfman: Fine. My name is James. What's your’s?

{Maria glares at James}

James: What? That's the first step in getting to know someone. Knowing their name.

Maria: I'm Maria. And fine. You can wait on tables. There's an extra apron in the back. Go get it and--

{Maria is interrupted by one of the men at a table}

Voice: Hey! You have time to socialize, but not to get our onion rings?

Maria: *under her breath* Son coma dena….

James: *realizing what Maria is* Don't. I'll get rid of them.

{James walks over to the three men at the table.}

James: I'm gonna have to ask you men to leave the bar.

Brandon: I'm sorry, but last time I checked, you didn't work here. You can leave now. Bye. *waves at James rudely to go away*

Hawkeye: Yea, and tell your girlfriend to get us our God damn onion rin--

{Hawkeye is interrupted when James picks him up by his shirt and out of his chair so that his feet aren't touching the floor}

James: Now then, I’m going to ask you again. Kindly get the hell out of this nice lady’s bar.

{Maria is watching from across the room}

Maria: Son coma dena lasmana

Brandon, Voice, Legion, and Hawkeye in unison: We will leave now. Thank you for your service.

{James puts down Hawkeye and they all walk out of the building. James walks back to Maria.}

James: *talking into Maria’s ear* I'm not asking any questions right now. I'm just gonna go get the apron and start collecting orders. You're gonna go handle the the bar.

--

{We see the night go by while Maria is narrating}

[ How did he hear me? I thought I was so quiet. In fact I was. Shit. He's a werewolf. He can hear just about anything. He knows now, and Miranda is gonna kill me.]

{We see that there is only two girls left in the bar, it is about midnight and Maria wants to close up early.}

James: Alright ladies, glad I got to talk to you, but it's time to close up.

Lexi: You should come home with us.

Grav: Yeah, we’re a lot of fun.

James: That sounds tempting, Lexi, but I don't think it's a great idea. Plus the taxi I called for you nice girls, only has two seats.

Grav: Don't I sound tempting?

James: Uhh...

{Taxi pulls up}

James: Look, your taxi is here. I'll see you girls later.

Lexi and Grav: Bye James. *walks out towards the taxi*

James: Bye bye, girls. Now then, let’s talk about you. *turns towards Maria* You're a witch? That's so cool.

Maria: How the hell did you hear me? I was barely even talking.

James: I'm a werewolf. I have super hearing. It’s like, the only perk of being a werewolf. Well, that, and the strength, but that can also be a curse. I don't know. . . I just gotta keep my anger in check. I know why this bar got so popular when you girls took over. You spell the drinks, huh? You make them addictive, don't you?

Maria: No. We just make them taste better. We don't know what we're doing.

James: Hmmm, alright then. Well I--

{Maria interrupts}

Maria: You know what I am.

James: And you know what I am. I'm not gonna say anything, sweetheart, because then you could tell people what I am, and I don't want that.

Maria: I swear to god, if you say anything, I'll turn you into a--

{James over excitedly interrupts}

James: Toad! Just guessing.

Maria: Ha ha. So funny.

James: Oh, you know I am. So how long are the other employees gonna be gone?

Maria: I don't know. I hope not long, but that doesn't change the fact that they can be gone for days.

James: So I'll come back tomorrow.

Maria: You don't have to. I think I can handle it on my own.

James: *mocking Maria* I can handle it on my own. *normal voice* No you can't, and you know it. Did you see what happened tonight?

Maria: Yeah, but--

{James interrupts Maria again}

James: But, I'm coming tomorrow, and I'm helping out. I'll be here around 5, sinse you open at 6 and all.

Maria: Fine. But if you don't show, I'm not waiting for you.

James: Yes ma'am. Well, I must be going, but I will see you tomorrow.

Maria: Fine.

{James walks out of the bar and Maria stays to clean up. As she's cleaning, we hear her narration}

[ He's coming back tomorrow and he's not gonna tell anyone what I am. It bothers me that we don't know each other, but he's still so nice to me. Why? No guy has ever been this nice to me, and I kinda like it, but I really don't wanna scare him off. I can't scare him off. He's so nice. I hope he stays for awhile. I really hope he stays. Ha, maybe Miranda was right, he can maybe one day be my wolfman.]