User blog comment:Alexneushoorn/Epic Rap Battles of Savagery - Mario vs Sonic/@comment-25907157-20160809173942

There are a lot of things wrong with this battle, and I will address each of them accordingly.

Verse structure is rather unusual. You usually want your verses to be divisible by four in most cases. There are exceptions to this of course. Six line verses are okay, but you have a ten line verse, nine line verse, and even an eleven line verse. These make the rap feel awkard and poorly put together

A lot of the couplets don't rhyme. Just to give a few examples, battle and pebble, meals and emcees, let's-a-go and slave. Some of these are because of your formatting, which kinda ties into the first problem. Some lines look unfinished or fused with another line. So, fix your formatting, and some of these rhyme issues will be solved as well.

Some of your lines are extremely generic and/or repetitive. This can be excused a little since this is your first battle, but it should be corrected as soon as possible. For example, let me point to this couplet

" Amy and I are pretty good friends.

Tails and I will be friends 'til the end."

What was the point of that? These are just statements that neither diss Mario, nor help Sonic boost himself up. I could point to other examples, but my comment is long enough as it is.

In conclusion, even for a first battle, this was rather subpar. On the bright side, this is the first battle, so you can only go up from here. Good luck with your future work.