User blog:NightFalcon9004/Speed Racer vs Rainbow Dash. Epic Cartoon Rap Battles 14

The competitive racer from his self-titled anime, Speed Racer, and the racing pegasus representing the element of loyalty, Rainbow Dash, rap against each other, to see who's faster. In the middle of the battle, Dick Dastardly helps Speed Racer he spins out in the race.

Beat produced by Cacola



Announcer: (0:00 - 0:11)

EPIC CARTOON RAP BATTLES!

SPEED RACER!

VS!

RAINBOW DASH!

BEGIN!

Rainbow Dash: (0:11 - 0:22)

Straight outta Cloudsdale, I'm here to beat this anime brat.

My wing speed and horsepower knocks you out in ten seconds flat!

I push my limits sky high if I want to get far.

Only reason you win races is your overpowered car!

Speed Racer: (0:22 - 0:47)

I was born to race, winning more cups than you can.

I'll get more violent on this pegasus than when I aired in Japan!

I am Speed, a machine, like Lightning McQueen.

My engine's so thunderous, it makes the Wonderbolts spin!

Although you're brave and all, you'll wish you backed out of this.

Element of loyalty, my ass. All you are is selfish!

You're such a cocky bitch! I'd challenge Rainbow Brite

Rather than this arrogant, air-hoggin' colorful dyke!

Rainbow Dash: (0:47 - 1:12)

You're one to talk about gays, you girly-faced wimp.

People will bet money on this racing horse for the win!

Think you can steal my thunder? I make Lightning Dust eat my dust!

Rapping so fast, my Sonic Rainbooms make the sound barrier bust!

Your animations, your movie, and your Mach 5 pile of junk

Play cheap like you do with your bro and monkey in the trunk.

I'm so awesome as a flier, I'll leave this whole track on fire!

Never exhausted or tired, but I'll Spitfire on your tires!

[Rainbow Dash pops a tire on the Mach 5, causing Speed Racer to lose control.]

Speed Racer: (1:13 - 1:19)

Oh no! I can't finish, I'm losing velocity!

[A new racer wearing a helmet drives onto the track.]

Whoa, is that Racer X?

'Dick Dastardly: (1:19 - 1:44)

Nope, it's me!

Race against my rhythm? Now that's just wacky.

You're a soarin' sore loser who always flies tacky.

Even Muttley takes faster walks than this, what a surprise.

I won't need cheats to beat you 'cause you're already jeopardized!

I drive a Mean Machine to screw you over without a win.

Make ya Rainbow Crash like a curse so you're foiled again!

You'll scream "Drat, drat, and double drat!" when you plummet to the ground.

Run ya over, break your limbs, leave ya with a limp, and put you down!

Rainbow Dash: (1:44 - 1:56)

This isn't Mario Kart, Waluigi. Better get your Tank Lakitu-towed.

An amateur and a Dick won't last a lap on this Rainbow Road.

Even being 20 percent cooler won't help you win races, so I'll leave y'all behind.

Hope you never cross with me again like you never cross the finish line!

Announcer: (1:56 - 2:08)

WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

EP–

WHOOSH!

EPIC–

VROOM!

EPIC CARTOON RAP BATTLES!

Who won? Speed Racer and Dick Dastardly Rainbow Dash