Betty White vs Bettie Page

Betty White vs Bettie Page is an unofficial battle that was planned in Season 2, but was scrapped mid-production. It would have featured American actress, Betty White, rapping against the Queen of Pinups, Bettie Page.

Bettie Page:
Bettie Page is my name. I'm the pin-up queen

I tamed leopards with my fist, and some breasty physique

You're like a hundred, and a dumb shit, and you're not still hot either

Hot in Cleveland? Yeah, you're a Cleveland Steamer

I sewed my own panties and set fashion trends

Come see me some time, I'll make you a cute pair of Depends

I was in Playboy, hag, I got paid to pose

Folks would shell out all they owned just for you to stay clothed

Betty White:
Ho, why don't you go make yourself handy

Dive down and munch on my wrinkled poonannie

You're racist, but you'll feel some White power

When I lift my moo moo and give you a Golden Girl shower

You showed T 'n' A, but who's still relevant? Me

'Cause unlike you, my T and A spells L-E-N-T

Bettie with the I-E, don't try me

I'm old and grumpy, it's been a while since I've had a man inside me

Bettie Page:
A golden shower party? Sounds kinky! I'm in!

It's just too bad you've outlived all of your friends

It took Facebook to put you back in the comedy trail

Congrats on being the oldest host to ever suck on SNL!

If you tripped and fell, you'd probably never get up

Betty White:
Ladies and gentlemen, the secret password is "slut"

Lovely bangs, Bettie, you country hoodrat!

You wear those to remind you banging's all that you're good at?

Bettie Page:
I'm a calendar girl, you're a GILF at best

The only thing that needs pinned up on you is your chest!

Betty White:
You went from bondage model to born again Christian

I've been acting since 39, bitch, I'm consistent

Bettie Page:
Bitch, I'm crazy! I'll stab you like my landlady!

Go back to St. Olaf and keep not having babies!

Betty White:
This is just like one of your old fashion shoots, skank

Stick a ball-gag in your mouth, 'cause you just got spanked!