Shaka off - Taylor swift

XD idk I just thought of that.

What do you think about Fezzik Vs Vizzini

Here's to a Happy New Year everyone.

Well for one of the villains, which is the basis for this battle, is Hades from Hercules. Now there are 2 competing villains to go against hades. I’m thinking Dr. Facillier from princess and the frog. They’re both Disney Villains, deal with spirits, and are super under appreciated as Disney villains. Next is Hela from the Marvel Comics. They’re both based off of real gods of death, powerful, and evil. Now those are my ideas, but I’m open to suggestions

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY:

MICHAEL MYERS VS. JASON VOORHEES

BEGIN!

Michael Myers – Verse 1

Go on back to the ice rink, you’re a goalie out of luck.

I’m gonna beat your ass like a player with the puck.

If you see my knife, you know you’ll feel its sting.

That machete looks more like you’re compensating for something.

Since my first appearance, I made audience members shudder.

Your first movie stared your crazy ass mother.

When your day comes about, people think it’s bad luck,

When Halloween comes around, folks get hyped up as fuck!

When they talk about me, they say that I’m pure evil.

Your stupid true form is a scaly heart weasel.

I made my first kill when I was only six.

You sank like a rock in your personally River Styx.

Why people find you scary, I just don’t understand.

You’re whiney deformed child, I’m the fucking boogeyman!

Jason Voorhees – Verse 1

When it comes to slaying teens, you know that I’m the best.

Your picture’s in the dictionary next to the phrase ‘sister-complex’.

My mask is iconic. I make hockey scary.

Your Shatner mask is dumber than Curly, Moe, and Larry.

When my day comes, the superstitious quake with fear.

You give candy to kids on a day just once a year.

When you first took the stage, the budget ran cheap,

So you filled in your runtime just staring like a creep.

You were meant to be a single film, but then what the heck,

Carpenter wrote a stupid sequel for a motherfucking check!

Everyone knows my name; you can see the way they cower.

You’re someone that gets mixed up with the man who’s Austin Powers.

You’re not good enough to be a character, so they call you The Shape.

I’ll chop your head off hardcore, like your sister, Keri Tate.

Michael Myers – Verse 2

I wear a mask on face, to hide the evil behind it.

You wear one ‘cause your face looks just like shit.

Wait, did I say a mask? Your first one was just a bag,

‘Cause you got your nasty looks from some bitchy, ugly hag.

And sure I kill my family, but because it gives me joy.

At least it’s better than being a dumbass mama’s boy!

You chased your family too, so you’re just a copy, mister,

But the difference between us is you violate your sister.

I got more bars than movies, and yet they cry for more.

Your repetitive crap is really quite a bore.

You can tell that a series is stuck going no place,

When they send the main villain up to motherfucking space.

There’s no two ways about it, you really kind of suck.

And this Friday the 13th, it looks like you’re out of luck.

Jason Voorhees – Verse 2

I’m actually surprised that you can look about,

Considering you had both of your eyeballs shot right out.

I only possessed my sister to come back piece-by-piece,

But I’m still wondering why you knocked up your niece.

We both have lots of movies, but my franchise runs strong.

They kept redoing your series ‘cause they get their shit all wrong.

Got a reboot and remake, but I don’t which is worse,

Both of those disasters, or your dumbass fucking Curse.

And you wanna bring up copies, did you think that I’d miss this?

You got your schtick from the movie Black Christmas.

You may think that I’m a rip-off, but I’m actually an improvement.

You sat there for several years, and without a single movement.

And just one more thing, warning, this may trigger,

If we’re comparing sizes, my machete is much bigger.

Michael Myers – Verse 3

I took the world by storm, you hardly took Manhattan.

Just stayed at a lake killing teens all dressed in satin.

They reboot my series, ‘cause I’m too good to throw away,

But your same old crap won’t live to see another day.

The reason you won’t die is ‘cause you’re already dead.

They throw tons of shit at me, but I stay alive instead.

You’re a peeper who gets triggered seeing teens having sex,

‘Cause you know that you’ll never get to have some triple X.

I’ll wrap this up now with this very next jab.

You’ll feel it like my knife, Jason. Stab, stab, stab.

You’re a hydrophobic retard, and just as a bonus,

You weren’t in the fifth film, and no one even noticed.

Hey, is something cooking? I recognize that smell.

It’s you getting burned, now go on back down to Hell.

Jason Voorhees – Verse 3

You wanna talk about Hell? That’s the development your in.

Now watch me as I come back in now for the win.

I’m an OP super zombie, you’re a fragile sixty plus old man.

Hell, you even lost a good portion of your hand.

Been an undead monster since I was struck by lightin’,

And just like Frankenstein, my shit is really frightenin’.

Friday Five’s killer may have impersonated me,

But what is your excuse for Halloween 3?

You faced your sister twice, and she’s got a twofer.

Guess who I beat: Freddy-motherfucking-Krueger!

They called in a whole swat team to catch me for my crimes.

You got you ass kicked by fucking Busta Rhymes!

This battle is over, there’s no need to have a duel.

Your holiday is canceled, you post-Mischief Night fool.

WHO WON? WHO’S NEXT? YOU DECIDE!

--------------------------------------------------

RAP MEANINGS

Michael Myers – Verse 1

“Go on back to the ice rink, you’re a goalie out of luck.”

(This is in reference to the fact that Jason wears a hockey mask, and that his franchise is called Friday the 13th, which is considered a day of bad luck, and also happens to be Jason’s birthday.)

“I’m gonna beat your ass like a player with the puck.”

(Michael is saying how he’ll both physically beat up Jason and beat him in the rap battle, comparing it to how hockey players smack around a hockey puck. He’s also referencing how Jason was bullied as a child.)

“If you see my knife, you know you’ll feel its sting.”

(Michael’s signature method of killing is through the use of a butcher’s knife.)

“That machete looks more like you’re compensating for something.”

(Michael is taking a jab at Jason by suggesting that his machete is compensation for him having a small penis. This is somewhat backed up in Freddy vs. Jason since Jason took a kick to the groin and didn’t even react, possibly implying that he no longer even has genitals due to his decomposition.)

“Since my first appearance, I made audience members shudder.”

(The opening to the first Halloween movie is considered one of the most frightening and suspenseful of all movie openings.)

“Your first movie stared your crazy ass mother.”

(Jason doesn’t actually show up as the killer until the second movie, as his mother was the killer in the first movie, who had gone insane and was seeking revenge for the death of her son.)

“When your day comes about, people think it’s bad luck,”

(This is another reference to the date Friday the 13th being bad luck, and that many people don’t like the day because of it, and he’s saying that people don’t like Jason’s franchise either.)

“When Halloween comes around, folks get hyped up as fuck!”

(Michael is boasting how people get excited for Halloween, and that some people, even companies, taking it to the extreme. He’s also pointing out how people get very excited for his movies while saying that people don’t get as excited for Jason’s.)

“When they talk about me, they say that I’m pure evil.”

(Michael is defined by his psychiatrist, Dr. Loomis, as being purely and simply evil incarnate and having no trace of humanity or even consciousness left in him.)

“Your stupid true form is a scaly heart weasel.”

(In Jason Goes To Hell, it’s revealed that Jason’s body is just “meat” and his true form/body is actually his heart, which is a demonic rodent-like creature that controls him.)

“I made my first kill when I was only six.”

(Michael killed his sister, Judith, when he was six years old.)

“You sank like a rock in your personally River Styx.”

(While being bullied by other kids, Jason was pushed into Crystal Lake, where he drowned. The River Styx is a river in Greek mythology located in the underworld that connects the living world to the world of the dead. The word “styx” means hate, so Michael is also pointing out that Jason is full of hate and that people hate him. This also connects to how after Jason drowned, his soul is said to dwell in Crystal Lake. The River Styx also grants invulnerability, which goes with how Jason is unkillable.)

“Why people find you scary, I just don’t understand.”

(Michael’s saying that he doesn’t understand why people find Jason scary.)

“You’re whiney deformed child, I’m the fucking boogeyman!”

(Jason has been deformed since birth, and is known for having a childish mentality while Michael is stated to be the boogeyman.)

Jason Voorhees – Verse 1

“When it comes to slaying teens, you know that I’m the best.”

(Jason is most known for killing teenagers, most specifically camp counselors.)

“Your picture’s in the dictionary next to the phrase ‘sister-complex’.”

(Michael’s primary target and nemesis is his sister, Laurie Strode, whom he’s relentlessly driven to kill.)

“My mask is iconic. I make hockey scary.”

(Many people consider Jason’s hockey mask as the most iconic slasher mask.)

“Your Shatner mask is dumber than Curly, Moe, and Larry.”

(Michael’s mask was originally a William Shatner/Captain Kirk mask that was spray painted white, as it and a clown mask were the only masks available at the store when Halloween was being made. Jason is saying that Michael’s mask is dumber than Larry, Curly, and Moe, who are the dimwitted protagonists of the series The Three Stooges.)

“When my day comes, the superstitious quake with fear.”

(Superstitious people tend to become especially fearful of the date Friday the 13th and think things that are already bad luck are even more unlucky than usual, and that the day itself is bad.)

“You give candy to kids on a day just once a year.”

(Jason is saying that while Friday the 13th inspires real fear is people, Halloween is just a day of fun where kids receive candy when they go Trick-or-Treating and thus is not actually something to be afraid of. Friday the 13th can also occur up to three times a year, while Halloween only occurs once.)

“When you first took the stage, the budget ran cheap,”

(The first Halloween is known for having a very limited budget.)

“So you filled in your runtime just staring like a creep.”

(The script for the first Halloween wasn’t that long. Coupled with the low budget, a lot of the movie’s runtime was spent building up tension and drawing out scenes. Jason is also making fun of Michael for spending so much time simply stalking and staring at his victims rather than actually doing anything.)

“You were meant to be a single film, but then what the heck,”

(The first Halloween was meant to be a standalone film, but a sequel was made due to its popularity.)

“Carpenter wrote a stupid sequel for a motherfucking check!”

(John Carpenter, who wrote the script for Halloween, was very opposed to having to write a sequel and did so very reluctantly, even admitting that he didn’t know what he was doing while writing it. Jason is saying that Carpenter wrote a bad sequel just to get a paycheck.)

“Everyone knows my name; you can see the way they cower.”

(The name Jason Voorhees is famously known both in and out of the horror industry.)

“You’re someone that gets mixed up with the man who’s Austin Powers.”

(Michael Myers is also the name of a famous movie actor who’s mostly known for playing in comedies, most notably the Austin Powers movies, which are titled after the main character.)

“You’re not good enough to be a character, so they call you The Shape.”

(Michael is occasionally credited as “The Shape” due to Carpenter wanting to give him a mysterious and dangerous vibe. Jason is saying this was actually because he wasn’t good enough to be considered a real character.)

“I’ll chop your head off hardcore, like your sister, Keri Tate.”

(Keri Tate is the alias Michael’s sister, Laurie, used in Halloween H20 to hide her true identity. At the end of the movie, she cut off Michael’s head with a fire axe, although the sequel revealed that the decapitated man was just a decoy and not the real Michael.)

Michael Myers – Verse 2

“I wear a mask on face, to hide the evil behind it.”

(The purpose of Michael’s mask is to make evil faceless to suggest that evil actions can be perpetrated by anyone, anytime. In the Rob Zombie Halloween remake, Michael as a child says he wears masks to hide the ugliness he sees in himself, and that they are symbolic of the way he feels. His main mask has the most meaning to him, and reflects the unconsciousness of his mind, which Dr. Loomis describes as being the ultimate kind of evil.)

“You wear one ‘cause your face looks just like shit.”

(Michael is mocking how Jason wears his mask to hide the fact that he is very ugly due to his deformity.)

“Wait, did I say a mask? Your first one was just a bag,”

(In Jason’s first movie as a killer, instead of a hockey mask, he wore a pillowcase over his head.)

“‘Cause you got your nasty looks from some bitchy, ugly hag.”

(Michael is insulting Jason’s mother by calling her both bitchy and ugly, claiming that she’s where he got his ugliness from.)

“And sure I kill my family, but because it gives me joy.”

(Michael is justifying why he’s driven to kill his family.)

“At least it’s better than being a dumbass mama’s boy!”

(Jason is well-known for being a mama’s boy who will do anything his mother tells him, and has been tricked by others who pretend to be his mother to get him to listen to them. He’s also insulting Jason’s low intelligence.)

“You chased your family too, so you’re just a copy, mister,”

(Michael is calling Jason a copy of him because he primarily went after his remaining family members in Jason Goes To Hell since he could only be killed and reborn by someone of his blood.)

“But the difference between us is you violate your sister.”

(After Jason was blown apart, his heart demon crawled up the vagina of his sister’s corpse in order to be reborn through her.)

“I got more bars than movies, and yet they cry for more.”

(Michael is saying that despite there being numerous Halloween movies, fans are almost always eager for more additions to the franchise. He’s also saying that he has more rap bars than he does movies, and people still want more.)

“Your repetitive crap is really quite a bore.”

(Michaels is saying that the Friday the 13th movies are boring and repetitive, as each movie is essentially the same, just with different characters.)

“You can tell that a series is stuck going no place,”

(Michael is saying that the Friday the 13th series isn’t going anywhere or doing anything different.)

“When they send the main villain up to motherfucking space.”

(The movie Jason X takes place in the future, where Jason ends up on a space station. Michael is mocking Jason for his franchise taking this unpopular route.)

“There’s no two ways about it, you really kind of suck.”

(Michael is saying that Jason sucks as a character.)

“And this Friday the 13th, it looks like you’re out of luck.”

(Michael is saying that Jason’s luck has run out, both as a franchise and in their rap battle. He’s also referring to Friday the 13th being unlucky again.)

Jason Voorhees – Verse 2

“I’m actually surprised that you can look about,”

(Jason is saying how he’s surprised that Michael can see.)

“Considering you had both of your eyeballs shot right out.”

(In the second Halloween movie, Laurie shot Michael in both his eyes, blinding him.)

“I only possessed my sister to come back piece-by-piece,”

(Jason is countering Michael’s earlier jab about him violating his sister by saying that he only did so in order to be reborn through her.)

“But I’m still wondering why you knocked up your niece.”

(Though never explicitly stated, it’s been implied that Michael raped his niece, Jamie Lloyd, to pregnancy, and that her child was meant to be his final victim.)

“We both have lots of movies, but my franchise runs strong.”

(Jason is saying that even though both he and Michael have a lot of movies, his franchise is the one that’s running strong and maintaining its popularity.)

“They kept redoing your series ‘cause they get their shit all wrong.”

(Jason is mocking how the Halloween franchise keeps getting reboots so that the different movies have different continuities. The continuities include the movies 1, 2, 4, 5, and 6, movies 1, 2, 7, and 8, and movies 1, Halloween 2018, and it’s two upcoming sequels. The franchise also includes a remake of the original and a sequel to the remake.)

“Got a reboot and remake, but I don’t which is worse,”

(Jason is saying that the Halloween remakes and reboots are both bad and that he can’t tell which of them is worse.)

“Both of those disasters, or your dumbass fucking Curse.”

(In Halloween 6, which is called The Curse of Michael Myers, it’s revealed that Michael is under the curse of the Thorn of Thurisaz, which drives a person to sacrifice their entire family, and this is the reason why Michael is so obsessed with killing off his family. Jason is calling this plot point dumb.)

“And you wanna bring up copies, did you think that I’d miss this?”

(Jason is referring to the earlier jab of Michael claiming that Jason is a copy of him and saying how he noticed something.)

“You got your schtick from the movie Black Christmas.”

(Jason is claiming that Halloween and Michael are just copies of the movie Black Christmas and it’s killer, which came out four years before Halloween. There has been debate on whether Halloween was inspired by Black Christmas, as it did ride on its popularity.)

“You may think that I’m a rip-off, but I’m actually an improvement.”

(The same way Halloween rode on the popularity and used the same gimmick of Black Christmas, Friday the 13th did the same with Halloween and took inspiration from it. But Jason is claiming that rather than being a copy of Michael, he’s an improvement.)

“You sat there for several years, and without a single movement.”

(Jason is making fun of the fact that Michael is known for spending years at a time being dormant and inactive before he goes on his killing sprees.)

“And just one more thing, warning, this may trigger,”

(Jason is warning Michael that he has another jab coming and that it may upset him.)

“If we’re comparing sizes, my machete is much bigger.”

(This is in reference to what Michael said earlier about Jason’s machete compensating for him having a small penis. He’s countering the jab by pointing out how his machete is bigger than Michael’s knife, while also suggesting that his penis is bigger than Michael’s.)

Michael Myers – Verse 3

“I took the world by storm, you hardly took Manhattan.”

(The first Halloween movie is considered among the best, if not thee best, and scariest slasher movie of all time, and Michael is considered the best and scariest slasher of all time. The eighth Friday the 13th movie is called Jason Takes Manhattan, but only the very end of the movie takes place in Manhattan, giving the movie a very misleading title.)

“Just stayed at a lake killing teens all dressed in satin.”

(Michael is mocking Jason for the fact that nearly all his movies take place at Camp Crystal Lake, where Jason spends his time killing teenagers, usually in their bathing suits, underwear, or counselor clothes, if they’re not simply naked.)

“They reboot my series, ‘cause I’m too good to throw away,”

(Michael is countering Jason’s jab of how his series keeps getting rebooted by claiming that he’s too good of a character for the slasher genre to move on from.)

“But your same old crap won’t live to see another day.”

(Michael is once more saying how Jason’s series is very repetitive and that nothing more will come from the series because of it.)

“The reason you won’t die is ‘cause you’re already dead.”

(The reason Jason can’t be killed is because he’s already dead, so he can’t actually be killed again. Michael is also using this as a way to suggest that Jason’s franchise is dead.)

“They throw tons of shit at me, but I stay alive instead.”

(Unlike Jason, Michael is still alive and simply can’t be killed. This is also his way of saying that his franchise will stay alive, unlike Jason’s.)

“You’re a peeper who gets triggered seeing teens having sex,”

(Jason is known for stalking his victims, and particularly targets teenagers who are getting intimate, due to a grudge he holds since he drowned because the counselors that were supposed to be watching him were too busy having sex.)

‘Cause you know that you’ll never get to have some triple X.

(Porn movies have an X rating, with the more explicit ones have an XX and an XXX rating. Michael is using this to say that Jason will never get to have sex.)

“I’ll wrap this up now with this very next jab.”

(Michael is saying he’s about end his rap with his closing insults, claiming that he’ll win the rap with them.)

“You’ll feel it like my knife, Jason. Stab, stab, stab.”

(Michael is saying that his incoming jab is going to sting as bad as getting stabbed by his knife.)

“You’re a hydrophobic retard, and just as a bonus,”

(Michael is insulting Jason for being mentally handicapped, and because he drowned as a boy, there have been instances where Jason has shown to have a fear of water.)

“You weren’t in the fifth film, and no one even noticed.”

(In the fifth movie, Friday the 13th: A New Beginning, Jason was not the killer. Instead, a man named Roy Burns impersonated Jason and went on a killing spree to get revenge for the murder of his son. Everyone thought he was really Jason until he was killed at the end of the movie. Michael is insulting Jason by saying that no one noticed that he wasn’t the killer and that anyone can do Jason’s job.)

“Hey, is something cooking? I recognize that smell.”

(Michael is saying how he can smell Jason getting burned by his jabs.)

“It’s you getting burned, now go on back down to Hell.”

(In the 9th movie in the franchise, Jason Goes To Hell, Jason literally gets dragged down to Hell. Michael use of the word “burned” is both in reference to the fire of Hell and Jason getting burned by Michael’s raps.)

Jason Voorhees – Verse 3

You wanna talk about Hell? That’s the development your in.

(“Development Hell” is a phrase used when a movie is having trouble being made. In reference to Michael’s previous jab, Jason is saying that Michael’s character and franchise is in such trouble.)

“Now watch me as I come back in now for the win.”

(Jason is claiming that he’s going to win the rap with his final verse.)

“I’m an OP super zombie, you’re a fragile sixty plus old man.”

(OP is the abbreviation for “overpowered”. Jason is essentially a zombie with super strength, and he’s boasting at how powerful he is. In the 2018 Halloween reboot, Michael is over 60 years old, so Jason is calling him fragile.)

“Hell, you even lost a good portion of your hand.”

(In Halloween 2018, Michael had half of his hand blown off by a shotgun.)

“Been an undead monster since I was struck by lightin’,”

(After being chopped to pieces in the fourth Friday the 13th, Jason’s body was put back together and buried, but was later dug up, and resurrected by bolt of lightning.)

“And just like Frankenstein, my shit is really frightenin’.”

(Similar to Jason, the Frankenstein monster was made from the parts of seven men stitched together and brought to life by a bolt of lightning. Frankenstein is one of the great horror classics, and Jason is comparing himself and his franchise to how he is in terms of scariness.)

“Friday Five’s killer may have impersonated me,”

(Jason is referring to Michael’s comment of how Roy impersonated him to be the killer in the fifth Friday the 13th movie.)

“But what is your excuse for Halloween 3?”

(The Halloween franchise was originally meant to be a series of standalone movies, with Michael’s story ending with the second movie. Halloween 3: Season of the Witch did not include Michael, and instead focused on a cult that used androids to do their dirty work while they used pieces of a Stonehenge rune that they put in computer chips for the purpose of committing a ritualistic sacrifice. The chips were placed inside Halloween masks that would be activated by a TV signal in order to mass murder the thousands of people who bought their masks. The movie was widely hated by fans of the first two movies, who wanted Michael back, and so he returned for the fourth movie and has been in every Halloween movie since.)

“You faced your sister twice, and she’s got a twofer.”

(A twofer basically means two for the price of one. In two different continuities, Michael faced off against his sister, Laurie, twice, and she beat him each time.)

“Guess who I beat: Freddy-motherfucking-Krueger!”

(Jason faced off against Freddy Krueger from the Nightmare On Elm Street franchise in the movie Freddy vs. Jason. While Jason didn’t directly kill Freddy, he delivered the final blow in their fight, fatally wounding him. But since Freddy was killed off and Jason survived, he’s considered to be the victory of their fight.)

“They called in a whole swat team to catch me for my crimes.”

(In Jason Goes To Hell, an entire swat team lured Jason into a trap and shot him up before blowing him to pieces.)

“You got you ass kicked by fucking Busta Rhymes!”

(In Halloween Resurrection, the character Freddie Harris was played by Busta Rhymes, and he defeated Michael with a series of cheesy karate moves.)

“This battle is over, there’s no need to have a duel.”

(Jason is declaring his victory in the rap and that there’s no need for him and Michael to continue.)

“Your holiday is canceled, you post-Mischief Night fool.”

(Mischief Night is the night before Halloween, where kids play pranks, typically by egging and toilet papering houses and property. Jason is calling Michael a fool and a victim of this day while declaring Halloween to be canceled, which refers to both the holiday and Michael’s franchise.)

{Ok, so, this isn't mine. A friend of mine wrote this as a song-fic on their FanFictionNet account after getting inspired once they discovered ERB. They don't like using Wikis, but granted me permission to post it here. It be awesome to see this become the real ERB. Got all the lyrics, it just needs a beat. Warning for language, but it's a rap battle, so you knew that already.}

Battle of the masters of disguise! I like the idea of Borat, but I think not having Bruno or Ali G would be a missed opportunity. I think it could be fun to have 4 verses, with the first being Cohen, and then in each subsequent verse he's in character as Borat, Bruno, and Ali G. Obviously his opponent would have to be someone associated with disguises, and I think Count Olaf is the most fun person to put him up against, and he can also do the different disguises per verse thing. What do you think?

George Appleby vs. Walter

Clem Kadiddlehopper vs. Bubba J

San Fernando Red vs. Achmed the Dead Terrorist

Freddie the Freeloader vs. Peanut

Sheriff Deadeye vs. José Jalapeño on a Stick

Jacob Singer Vs. Donnie Darko

Lloyd Kaufman Vs. Charles Band

Jim Henson Vs. Andre Toulon

Jake from Statefarm Vs. Flo

Vince McMahon Vs. Tony Kahn

Jim Cornette Vs. Dave Meltzer

Ash WIlliams Vs. Finn Shepard

Hi, could I have an explanation as to why the Rap Battle polls are not working, I was going to start voting on the battles again a few weeks ago as I hadn't been on here in a few years, but the poll would only show the background but the actual poll itself wouldn't show up, is there any other way I can vote, and or have an answer to what has happened to them...

David Brent vs Michael Scott

Steve Urkel vs Fonzie

Spider man vs batman vs superman

Sheldon Cooper vs Frasier Crane

Leslie Knope vs Michael Scott

Jeff Winger vs Michael Bluth

Patrick Stewart vs Ian Mckellen

Captain Jean Luc Picard vs Captain James T. Kirk

John Locke vs Thomas Hobbes

Friends main characters vs How I met your mother main characters vs Seinfeld main Characters

Phil Dunphy vs Hal from Malcolm in the middle

Mork vs Dick Solomon

Kamahla Harris vs Mike Pence

Happy Gilmore vs Billy Madison

Elton John vs Billy Joel

Sam Malone vs John Becker

Erb vs vrb

Something like this:

(Pablo E.)

Call me Pablo.you can call me an expert of drugs,all you were expert in was causing children to get plucked.I'm the best drug dealer since Walter White,you really put me against a crazy lunatic that gives a sugar bite? you may have funny short men on your side,but your the reason of causing child suicide,your a crazy,ugly,lunatic that can't compare,from your purple dumb suit,to your terrible hair.Your clothing is bland and your movie is eerie,that ticket was a scam but that's just a game theory.

(Willy Wonka)

You came with that whack rap? you really are a bubble popper,your so bland that your raps stopped my gobstopper! you really came here to goof around? well let me show you an actual choclate quarter pound.your more gluttonous than Gloop and more feisty than Salt,you do drug dealing so stop accusing me of assault.your more poor than Charlie and more annoying than Mike why don't you give the world things they actually like.

Please make something like this ERB help me out

Would have made a blog but FANDOM™ doesn't seem to want that right now either.