Epic Rap Battles of History Wiki
Epic Rap Battles of History Wiki

Dis Raps for Hire - Season 2 Episode 1: Glasscock is the eleventh installment of Dis Raps For Hire and the first episode of Season 2. In this episode, EpicLLOYD helps BliinD21 with some bullies who make fun of him for his last name, Glasscock. This also marks the first appearance of Lloyd's CD salesman ego, Vinny Squiggliani. It was released on March 11th, 2013.


It makes me wanna scream CAPS lock and break kids

Who trash talk Glasscock on a day to day basis!

I vacation a few weeks; I gotta come back to this?

It's the type of thing that only Dis Raps can fix!

BliinD21, he ain't too keen to come

To school with these dudes always offering condoms!

I hear your please, please, please, and I'm here to help.

You tell some dude to keep his rubbers and go fuck hisself!

Say, you can take an art class, and glassblow me, homie!

Last time I checked, y'all inspected my junk too closely!

Does it break? Does it hurt? You're so curious!

Tell you what, stuff my balls into your mouth for some lunch!

Give my reproductive organs a suck until they bust a nut,

Then ask my knot directly whether or not they're made of flesh and blood!

Call me Glasscock, and when I clutch my crotch,

I see your bling and rocks, and take 'em up a notch!

Y'all circle my style like vultures,

'Cause when I drop my draws, I'm hung like an ice sculpture!

Thick and solid; I'm clear and ballin', ooh,

Gotta see through tube like porn stars use!

And plus, not for nothing with the ladies, I'm nice!

I just utter my full name, and I break the ice!

That's right, Glassssscock! You fuckin' own that shit!

There's a million boring pricks all named John Smith!

To you Weiners and Wangs, and all you boys named Sue!

Say your name with pride, too! Nothing else you could do!

These folks making tired jokes, yo, it's just sad,

'Cause your cock's the size of a shot glass, maaaan!

I get it; I mean it. I could see how that'd shrink your self esteem

To the size of your tiny little penis!

And you think it's nothing, taking shots daily like that,

But it's the type of thing that drives a cat to grab a gat and shoot back,

And that sucks, so y'all keep your big traps shut!

Dig down in your guts and man up for once!

Just remember who the message is from: Glasscock

And a raging EpicLLOYD as the mascot!



  • This is the first Dis Rap in which the episode name is the name of the person Lloyd is defending.
  • This is the first time where Lloyd's client's letter is read to the viewer.
  • This is technically the second Dis Raps where he disses a whole school, or at least a big part of one, the first being Southwest High.
  • Mike Betette appears here as a model/endorser for Lloyd's CD, together with Vinny Squiggliani.
  • At the start of each Dis Rap, after reading the requester's comment, Lloyd yells angrily. In this episode, he says "Poor kid!"

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