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{{CharacterInfobox |
{{CharacterInfobox |
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|name = <big>George R. R. Martin</big> |
|name = <big>George R. R. Martin</big> |
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| − | |image = [[File: |
+ | |image = [[File:George R. R. Martin Title Card.png|300px]] |
|caption = <big>[[EpicLLOYD]] as George R. R. Martin</big> |
|caption = <big>[[EpicLLOYD]] as George R. R. Martin</big> |
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|fullname = George Raymond Martin |
|fullname = George Raymond Martin |
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|nicknames = George R. R. Martin<br>GRRM<br>The American Tolkien |
|nicknames = George R. R. Martin<br>GRRM<br>The American Tolkien |
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| − | |born = September 20, 1948 (age |
+ | |born = September 20, 1948 (age {{Age |
| + | |birth_year=1948 |
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| + | |birth_month=9 |
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| + | |birth_day=20}})<br>''Bayonne, New Jersey'' |
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|hair = Gray |
|hair = Gray |
||
|eyes = Blue |
|eyes = Blue |
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| − | |image2 = [[File:George R. R. Martin Based On. |
+ | |image2 = [[File:George R. R. Martin Based On.png|300px]] |
|ERBnumber = [[J. R. R. Tolkien vs George R. R. Martin]] |
|ERBnumber = [[J. R. R. Tolkien vs George R. R. Martin]] |
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|vs = [[J. R. R. Tolkien]] |
|vs = [[J. R. R. Tolkien]] |
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|releasedate = May 2, 2016 |
|releasedate = May 2, 2016 |
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| − | |votecount = |
+ | |votecount = TBA |
| − | |location = [[The Great Hall]]<br>[[Somme |
+ | |location = [[The Great Hall]]<br>The [[Somme]]<br>''HBO logo''}} |
| − | {{Quote|My readers fall in love with every character I've written |
+ | {{Quote|My readers fall in love with every character I've written!|George R. R. Martin}} |
'''George R. R. Martin''' battled [[J. R. R. Tolkien]] in [[J. R. R. Tolkien vs George R. R. Martin]]. He was portrayed by [[EpicLLOYD]]. |
'''George R. R. Martin''' battled [[J. R. R. Tolkien]] in [[J. R. R. Tolkien vs George R. R. Martin]]. He was portrayed by [[EpicLLOYD]]. |
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==Lyrics== |
==Lyrics== |
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| + | ['''Note:''' ''George R. R. Martin is in <span style="color:#88ACE0">light blue</span>, while [[Jon Snow]] is in regular text.''] |
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| + | |||
==='''Verse 1:'''=== |
==='''Verse 1:'''=== |
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| − | Brace yourself! |
+ | <span style="color:#88ACE0">Brace yourself!</span> |
| − | Gather up your trolls and your |
+ | <span style="color:#88ACE0">Gather up your trolls and your [[High Elves|<span style="color:#88ACE0">soldier elves</span>]],</span> |
| − | And your Ents and your |
+ | <span style="color:#88ACE0">And your Ents and your [[Orc|<span style="color:#88ACE0">Orcs</span>]], and your Wargs and your Stings,</span> |
| − | Your dwarves and Glamdrings, 'cause there's a new literary Lord in the Ring! |
+ | <span style="color:#88ACE0">Your dwarves and Glamdrings, 'cause there's a new literary Lord in the Ring!</span> |
| − | My readers fall in love with every character I've written! |
+ | <span style="color:#88ACE0">My readers fall in love with every character I've written!</span> |
| − | Then I kill 'em! ( |
+ | <span style="color:#88ACE0">Then I kill 'em!</span> (Ahhh!) <span style="color:#88ACE0">And they're like, "No, he didn't!"</span> |
| − | All your bad guys die and your good guys survive! |
+ | <span style="color:#88ACE0">All your bad guys die and your good guys survive!</span> |
| − | We can tell what's gonna happen by page and age five! |
+ | <span style="color:#88ACE0">We can tell what's gonna happen by page and age five!</span> |
| − | Tell your all-seeing eye to find some sex in your movies! |
+ | <span style="color:#88ACE0">Tell your [[The Eye of Sauron|<span style="color:#88ACE0">all-seeing eye</span>]] to find some sex in your movies!</span> |
| − | (Yeah!) Ditch the [[Mikey Walsh|Goonie]] and cast a couple boobies! |
+ | <span style="color:#88ACE0">(Yeah!) Ditch the [[Mikey Walsh|<span style="color:#88ACE0">Goonie</span>]] and cast a couple boobies!</span> |
| − | There's edgier plots in that ''David the Gnome''! |
+ | <span style="color:#88ACE0">There's edgier plots in that ''David the Gnome''!</span> |
| − | Your hobbit-hole heroes can't handle my throne! |
+ | <span style="color:#88ACE0">Your hobbit-hole heroes can't handle my throne!</span> |
==='''Verse 2:'''=== |
==='''Verse 2:'''=== |
||
| − | I conscientiously object to what you're doing on these beats. |
+ | <span style="color:#88ACE0">I conscientiously object to what you're doing on these beats.</span> |
| − | I'll cut you like my teeth on ''Beauty and the Beast''! |
+ | <span style="color:#88ACE0">I'll cut you like my teeth on ''Beauty and the Beast''!</span> |
| − | You went too deep, Professor |
+ | <span style="color:#88ACE0">You went too deep, Professor Tweed-pants!</span> |
| − | We don't need the backstory on every |
+ | <span style="color:#88ACE0">We don't need the backstory on every fucking tree branch!</span> |
==='''Verse 3:'''=== |
==='''Verse 3:'''=== |
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| − | Man, your fat jokes are worse than your pipe smoke! |
+ | <span style="color:#88ACE0">Man, your fat jokes are worse than your pipe smoke!</span> |
| + | |||
| ⚫ | |||
| + | |||
| ⚫ | |||
| + | |||
| ⚫ | |||
| + | |||
| ⚫ | |||
| + | |||
| ⚫ | |||
| + | |||
| ⚫ | |||
| + | |||
| ⚫ | |||
| + | |||
| + | ==Scrapped lyrics== |
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| + | <span style="color:#88ACE0">I was pushing boundaries and taking chances!</span> |
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| + | |||
| + | <span style="color:#88ACE0">You were daydreaming, squatting in the trenches!</span> |
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| + | |||
| + | <span style="color:#88ACE0">You should've made like [[Hodor|<span style="color:#88ACE0">Hodor</span>]]: obeyed your orders!</span> |
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| + | |||
| + | <span style="color:#88ACE0">Spend less time on Mordor and more on the mortars!</span> |
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| + | |||
| + | ---- |
||
| + | |||
| + | <span style="color:#88ACE0">Bilbo's a dildo; my imp's a pimp!</span> |
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| + | |||
| + | ---- |
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| + | <span style="color:#88ACE0">You're a bigger wooden stiff than [[Gandalf|<span style="color:#88ACE0">Gandalf</span>]]'s staff!</span> |
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| ⚫ | |||
| + | <span style="color:#88ACE0">You gave us abstinence and Gary Gygax!</span> |
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| ⚫ | |||
| + | ---- |
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| ⚫ | |||
| + | <span style="color:#88ACE0">Fantasy movies need violence and boobies,</span> |
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| ⚫ | |||
| + | <span style="color:#88ACE0">Not folk songs and washed-up kids from ''The Goonies''!</span> |
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| ⚫ | |||
| + | ==Gallery== |
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| ⚫ | |||
| + | <gallery> |
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| + | George R.R. Martin Kills Jon Snow.png|George R. R. Martin stabbing [[Jon Snow]] |
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| + | </gallery> |
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| ⚫ | |||
{{Rapper}} |
{{Rapper}} |
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[[Category:Character main pages]] |
[[Category:Character main pages]] |
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Revision as of 09:06, 17 July 2019
| George R. R. Martin | |
|---|---|
 EpicLLOYD as George R. R. Martin | |
| Character information | |
| Birth name | George Raymond Martin |
| Nickname(s) | George R. R. Martin GRRM The American Tolkien |
| Born | September 20, 1948 (age 75) Bayonne, New Jersey |
| Physical description | |
| Hair | Gray |
| Eyes | Blue |
| Based on | |
| |
| Rap battle information | |
| Appeared in | J. R. R. Tolkien vs George R. R. Martin |
| Vs | J. R. R. Tolkien |
| Release date | May 2, 2016 |
| Official vote(s) | TBA |
| Location(s) | The Great Hall The Somme HBO logo |
| “ | My readers fall in love with every character I've written!
— George R. R. Martin
|
” |
George R. R. Martin battled J. R. R. Tolkien in J. R. R. Tolkien vs George R. R. Martin. He was portrayed by EpicLLOYD.
Information on the rapper
George Raymond Richard Martin, better known simply as George R. R. Martin, was born on September 20th, 1948, in Bayonne, New Jersey. He is the author of the critically acclaimed fantasy novel series A Song of Ice and Fire, the basis for the popular HBO television show Game of Thrones.
Lyrics
[Note: George R. R. Martin is in light blue, while Jon Snow is in regular text.]
Verse 1:
Brace yourself!
Gather up your trolls and your soldier elves,
And your Ents and your Orcs, and your Wargs and your Stings,
Your dwarves and Glamdrings, 'cause there's a new literary Lord in the Ring!
My readers fall in love with every character I've written!
Then I kill 'em! (Ahhh!) And they're like, "No, he didn't!"
All your bad guys die and your good guys survive!
We can tell what's gonna happen by page and age five!
Tell your all-seeing eye to find some sex in your movies!
(Yeah!) Ditch the Goonie and cast a couple boobies!
There's edgier plots in that David the Gnome!
Your hobbit-hole heroes can't handle my throne!
Verse 2:
I conscientiously object to what you're doing on these beats.
I'll cut you like my teeth on Beauty and the Beast!
You went too deep, Professor Tweed-pants!
We don't need the backstory on every fucking tree branch!
Verse 3:
Man, your fat jokes are worse than your pipe smoke!
My show's the hottest thing on HBO!
I'm rock and roll; you're a nerdy little nebbish,
And I may be dirty, but you got a hairy-foot fetish, dog!
Even the names of your characters suck:
You got Boffers and Bofurs and Brandybucks!
I got a second breakfast for all them goofy fucks!
Lift up my gut and tea-Baggins my nuts!
Scrapped lyrics
I was pushing boundaries and taking chances!
You were daydreaming, squatting in the trenches!
You should've made like Hodor: obeyed your orders!
Spend less time on Mordor and more on the mortars!
Bilbo's a dildo; my imp's a pimp!
You're a bigger wooden stiff than Gandalf's staff!
You gave us abstinence and Gary Gygax!
Fantasy movies need violence and boobies,
Not folk songs and washed-up kids from The Goonies!
Gallery
