Third off-season. It's Johnny Storm aka The Human Torch from the Fantastic Four against Dash Parr aka Dash from the Incredibles I wrote this one during massive writers block and was too lazy to come back to it afterwards. I would like to thank and credit Joe for helping me come up with some lines during my block. More words, you know the drill. It's time.






Johnny Storm

Do what you do and run away, little boy

Because I didn’t come to play, little boy

I’m as fantastic as Reed

Your real power isn’t speed

It’s your power to annoy.

You’re not incredible, you’re just Dash,

The miniature baby version of the Flash.

Who will find his brash ass in the trash

As my style flames on, burning you to ash.

You and victory, just simply do not mash.


I’m a speed machine who rules supreme.

You are the one who should run back to his team.

I flow like a surfer, I’ll straight up murder ya,

Send this arsonist to his Doom, come no further

Burning down buildings, doing damage by the truckload

I spit the ice cold disses, just call me Frozone

You and your skill simply are below Parr.

You can’t beat this MC star from Pixar.

You winning is problematic, since my rhymes win this automatically.

With you being a member, technically your team is the Fantastic Three.

Johnny Storm

Incrediboy is more incredible and less forgettable

And definitely less homosexual; You’re just expendable

I am always dependable and my dick is ever extendable,

While your genitals always stay the size of a grape.

My style is too hot, wherever you run, there is no escape.

You went down faster than a hero with a cape.


(Fast rapping)

The baddest kid from the baddest family spitting burns rapidly.

Running over MCs till they’re burned out is my specialty.

You simply can’t win, not even if Franklin warped reality.

You’re done within a blink, your disses are all misses, can’t hit the quickest.

You must be Mad if you Think you’ll walk away when this battle is finished.

You can’t be distinguished from your flow, since both have been extinguished.



The poll was created at 18:20 on October 10, 2014, and so far 5 people voted.



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Again, thanks for helping Joe

List of Joe's Battles
Season 1

Tintin vs. Asterix the GaulKatniss Everdeen vs Harry PotterEzio Auditore vs Jango FettHAL 9000 vs GLaDOSAtticus Finch vs Pheonix WrightWalter White vs Sheldon CooperHercule Poirot vs John LutherLyra Belacqua vs MatildaDovakhiin vs EragonTerry Pratchett vs Roald DahlKenan and Kel vs Drake and JoshMario vs Link

Season 2 Goku vs Teenage Mutant Ninja TurtlesYugi Moto vs Light YagamiJason Bourne vs Jack BauerZeus vs Homer SimpsonDoctor Who vs Phillip J FryRoy Race vs Rocky BalboaAsh Ketchum vs Bill & TedPercy Jackson vs AquamanHannibal Lecter vs Sherlock HolmesBatman vs Peter PanElsa vs Sub-ZeroHarry Potter vs Katniss Everdeen IIEmmet vs PoRobin Hood vs Captain Jack SparrowLewis Carroll vs CS Lewis
Season 3 Romeo and Juliet vs Tris and TobiasSHODAN vs CortanaEgypt vs ScandinaviaDaredevil vs NeoGamzee Makara vs The JokerNaruto Uzumaki vs OmiDaenarys Stormborn, of the House Targaryen vs Hiccup Horrendous Haddock IIIRoboCop vs Inspector GadgetFreddy Krueger vs Wolverine • TBA
Season 4 Sam and Dean vs Dipper and MabelKirito vs Brian DBeowulf vs HerculesEdmund Dantés vs Lelouch vi BritanniaBuffy Summers vs Ash WilliamsAlbus Dumbledore vs Miss PeregrineDeathstroke vs DeadpoolEren Jaeger vs ShulkHal Jordan vs Frodo Baggins • TBA • TBA • Season Finale
Joe's Possible Parodies Weavile vs Negative IV (Joan of Arc vs Miley Cyrus)
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