| Joeaikman vs Mortal5075 | |
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| Battle information | |
| Release date | 20/01/2023 |
| Timeline | |
| Beat Information | |
| Beat(s) | The Beat |
| Other information | |
| Rappers | wow theres still a tourney happening |
Ummmmmmmmm Josef Stalin Aikman vs me lets agoooo
Me and Joe are pals and we liked doing the regular battle so when a compliment tourney started Joe was one of my most wanted opponents. This is a really sweet battle I think. Joe really stood out last battle by being super sincere and genuine and I think the trend carries on here this is a super wholesome battle with a lot of genuine nice things that we think about each other and our feelings opened. Hoping everyone enjoyes this as much as we did making it. Beat is definitely something I can't use outside of a compliment tourney idk if Paddy will like it especially with the last 8 bars being a fadeout but I htink it works better than Abon vs Smoshery personally.
Hope everyone else also won't have dementia and forget this tourney exists and deliver some good battles thatd be nice.
Joeaikman:
Here’s me trying to explore ya, Fedora, but I don’t know where to start
I just adore ya, this Russian’s gone and annexed a place in my heart
The only beats I care about are the beatings you’re doling out
Won the semi-final on disses so you’ve already taken the first round
Now you’re just sleepwalkin’ sweet-talkin' me into a trash can
With more inches in your pants than I have chat bans
You win the ladies with your passion to oppose racist hate
Lenin’s not the only commie comrade getting' laid in state
Those thick and girthy verses serve some pretty phallic imagery
With lines as lengthy as your penis, though that has perfect symmetry
When life was fucking tough it was always you who got free
Maybe in the future it could be you teaching me aboutHot D
Mortal5075:
No wonder you rep Steve Harr cause what you served up was real sweet
When Joe Ackerman swings at Titans he's sweeping freaks off their feet
And you should treat yourself NOW, dude, you deserve proper support
Please know your worth, it's a big price to pay to sell yourself that short
Like you used to just lose in round 1 but man look at how far you've grown
Cause with how I see things you're at the top of the list in this Game to the Throne
And if the Battle of Bastards to finish it off will have you and Meat throwing blows
Then Meat’s the perverted Ramsay and you’re the heroic Jon Snow
Threatened to anally rape an underage dude, now some might say that's a diss
But there's no one else here who has the balls to say some shit like this
Always unsure but if you look back on your life and reflect like a rear view
You're an archaeologist, dude, dig up the buried treasure within you!
Joeaikman:
So before the emotional spout, you asked me to care for the beat count, boo
I’m sorry, but there’s just so many great things to say about you
If you’d stuck at university I’d have watched every play you starred in
I’d have let this rhyming ruski rummage at my southern borders like he’s Stalin
But there’s no shame in dropping out, mate that place was beneath you
Just where everyone on the wiki would want to be, I guarantee you
There’ll be no dust in your verses, you keep them all fresh with no wrinkles
If you must compare the mere mortals, then pick Fyodor; simples
Mortal5075:
Well I knew you were my mate and our friendship will go far
When you even said my Smoshery verses were some fire ass bars
Called you an asshole while writing this so some squabbles? Might have had a few.
But know that when the shit goes down then I will be right there for you
It's a fair issue, sometimes I wanted to sock you square for all you've done
But if I’m counting for support or votes then I know that Joe's the 1
So don't see yourself as the burden, I threw some proper tantrum fits
The only way that you're an arsehole is how you put up with my shit
Joeaikman:
I’m not worth the friendship you afforded me, I’ll never understand why you supported me,
A caustic, boorish white kid hid behind a sordid nonconformity,
Memories that always haunted me, wounds that scar me mortally,
Yet only one guy out there ever saw me to be more than a deformity,
You’re abnormally perceptive, detected the truth behind my amorality,
And in honour of your sagacity, I used Rhymezone to pen this salmon hatchery
And actually, you attached to me, even when the wiki cancelled me
When the calling of the knives rang with an absolute finality
When tears stained my face at the apogee of my reality
It was the truths that you then sang to me that pulled me from the tragedy
But even now I wonder if you wish you’d dipped quick and ignored me
And now I can’t imagine life without you in it, so just call us Dick and Morty
Mortal5075:
You're the wiki trend setter, with you the place was made better
Will never have our chain severed, will push 40s and still exchange letters
Your words are like the Cosby allegations, they can’t be fake
It really matters when you value my takes and say nice things for my sake
Know that I've got your back like a brothers back, will stick by you like an alpha pack
Took down your rotten ego when I saw through it like a lumberjack
And here's another fact, Joe's mad raps are so crazy
You can say this Aikman's like a white version of Jay-Z
But then sometimes we have that vibe like we'd be holding our sweaty hands
Like we could make our hairs clash like a fight for inheritance
And I don't think of you in that way, but shit, the gay mood is too blunt
So the only time you'll hear a beat is when you’re feeling my pulse
Joeaikman:
I said no to meeting up, and now I’ll confess to what the truth is
I just don’t feel worthy of your friendship, compared to you I’m fucking useless
You call yourself Mortal, but to me you belong up on Mount Olympus
Going by your dress sense, perhaps as the God of drip and trimness
That was a little joke to mask the fact that I’m crying as I write this
In the knowledge that I’m beneath you, and the fear you might also realise it
That one morning I’ll open Discord and drop you a DM that just won’t send
That the greatest friend I ever had has succumbed to wounds that don’t mend
Honestly I wouldn’t blame you, you’ve shown more patience than I could hope
More care than I am capable of, and an understanding of which I wouldn’t cope
You’re perfectly well-rounded, the angelic light toward which I reach
Whilst I shackle you to the shadows, lost in the darkness underneath
Mortal5075:
Asking me how to rep the gays, mate, I don't fucking know
But the fact that you even asked shows just how much you want to grow
So I'm sorry that I made you red, but these are straight facts, not that fake shit
Cause the only thing that can't possibly be more expanded is our friendship
Oh you gained a few pounds like a lotto? That's not much to beat yourself on though
Man, you don't look like no Moto Moto, a belly is not a lot, bro
You're beneath me? Bitch, you loco, when it comes to insults you're top tier
A type of guy to ask for pronouns before you say someone's too queer
Using swears don't make someone an ass, it brings a balance to the world
In the need of time the dickheads say the much needed harsher words
No Dave Groll Cave Troll, you're More Baller Momoa with style
And the only payment for all my time is having a big ol smile, dickhead
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