Wait, where's the news blog? Shouldn't there be a news blog before the last five battles? Wait...what do you mean it's just going to be finished one by one instead of a set? Come on, Wonder, you're not supposed to be so quick with your uploading, you need at least two more months before you can upload your next battle. >:(
But yeah. Buckle in and get ready, because these next few battles are gonna be some of my most requested ones yet. Well, this and two more will be. The other two aren't really. Whatever. Here, we're starting with Dante vs Dante, a battle that's been in the works since the beginning of this season, and was initially planned to happen first season, in fact, before being pushed back to this season. But here it is, and dear god do I love the end result of it.
It's a really big stretch to say that this is "my" battle. Because, as it turns out, it's not! It's written for my series, but I didn't write any of this. Instead, two guests, as it turned out, both really wanted to write for either side! And as I couldn't say no to them, I let them both write. And goddamn, did it turn out better than anything I've written yet. All I did was make the cool pics and choose the beat.
So, I can't stress this enough. DO NOT COMPLIMENT ME!! Compliment Lexi and Gravity instead. They both wrote this whole battle, and they are amazing. Again, do not say "good job" to me. Say it to them. pls. I deserve no credit in this battle. ;-;
DMC's Dante and Vergil were written by Lexi.
Dante and Virgil of the Divine Comedy were written by Gravity.
Neither and no one was written by me.
Please compliment them on this battle, not me!
That being said, let's get this underway. :)
'Main protagonist of the Devil May Cry series, Dante, and epic poet writer of The Divine Comedy, Dante, face off in a battle of hell-ish Dante's.'
btw, many thanks to Grav and Lexi for all their hardwork, especially to Lexi for putting up with my constant bothering about getting this done. <3
Battle[]
(Starts at 0:01)
EPIC RAP BATTLES: VIDEO GAMES VS HISTORY
VS
BEGIN!
Dante:[]
(0:22)
Let's get this party started! I'll be starting my combo of verses off Dope,
Ye entered here to battle rap me? Well somebody's abandoned all hope.
Needless to say, Aligheri the defeatist can't realistically expect to beat this,
Don't believe it? Little secret; my "sword" left your dearest Beatrice speechless.
Speaking of swords, least my Rebellion has actually made things better for me,
While yours on the other hands have gotten you rejected how many times from Italy?
Had to deal with Black and White Guelphs right in your very own home city,
Hope you're used to throwing shade, cuz I'm shooting you up like Ebony and Ivory!
Dude, you got arrested and rejected even more than Mussolini,
And now I'm breaking down your work even harder than Barolini!
You'll die from fever a second time, my raps are so ill, so cold, so vile.
Think I'll taunt this inferior Dante, already know I got that Smoking Sick Style!
Dante Alighieri:[]
(0:54)
GAH! How can you fail so badly if you were based off of me?
You can call me your debt, because my lines go deep!
You should run from my Inferno, but you keep on blowin’.
Now lemme hand it to the master to give me motion!
Virgil:[]
(1:05)
If emo Nathan Drake stares into my gaze, I will make him a grave.
For gods’ sakes, I just croon my tune and the royals faint!
It would be treacherous to mess with disses colder than the Ninth Ring!
And oh, non-canon, but I saw your father down there, how’s he doing?
Dante and Virgil:[]
(1:15)
We set the bedrock for our nations, literature, and language.
While you boned your mom’s clone, our loves are legends for generations!
We’ll re-boot your ass so hard, even your fans will be butt-hurt.
You’re more useless than Kyrie! Go reunite with your brother.
Dante and Vergil:[]
(1:26)
(A katana blocks Dante and stops him from starting his verse as his brother, Vergil steps forward.)
Well look who finally came to the party, let's Devil Trigger these amateurs!
Why not? Somebody should burn Virgil since his works never were.
Now the superior Vergil will be your guide as he puts you through lyrical hell,
Send Maro back to his tomb, he'll learn our differences aren't just how our names are spelled.
You don't spar with a Sparda, he'll send bars strong as Nero's arm against untalented bards,
I go hard, Fall Stars, you digust me like the scars of Arkham, can't guard, I fight with no holds barred.
Good so far, now lets maim our angsty namesake disgraces with one last shot!
Indeed. Because when it comes to easy opponents we hit the jackpot!
Dante and Virgil:[]
(1:47)
Who are you, plebeian? The male version of Elsa?
I’ll make you choke on your words like it’s a glass of vodka!
You won’t be the first sleuth to crack at the sight of my death mask!
Because the only D you have is the first letter of your class!
Devils never cry? Ha! That’s an excuse for pussies!
You’ll be safer under my two stones! Trust me!
How can you both kill on the mic if Dante killed his own brother?
We just murdered these fools! How’s hell? Say hello to your mother!
WHO WON?
WHO'S NEXT?
EPIC RA-
(The logo is suddenly lit on fire.)
-AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH-
(The fire disipates.)
-P BATTLES VIDEO GAMES VS HISTORYYYYY!!
Hint[]
Fire - hell has fire
Circles - Nine circles, referring to the nine circles of Hell
Lutece twins hint - they directly said it would be a name battle, lol
Lexi doesn't have a template I don't think, but check out her battles anyways. <3
| Mythical Battles of Historical Stuff | ||
|---|---|---|
| Season 1 | Hansel and Gretel vs Jack and Jill • Atlas vs Earth Turtle • Mowgli vs Tarzan • Aladdin vs Master Thief • Aztec vs Hindu • David vs Jack • Mulan vs Pope Joan • Slenderman vs the Bogeyman • The 12 Labors | |
| Season 2 | Three Bears vs Three Pigs • Davy Jones vs Bloody Mary • Gilgamesh vs Beowulf • Fu Manchu vs Allan Quartermain • Snow White vs Sleeping Beauty • Odysseus vs Sinbad • Zorro vs Robin Hood • Baldur vs Achilles • Hades vs Osiris | |
| Season 3 |
Area 51 vs Shangri-La • John the Baptist vs Priapus • The Three Wise Men vs Journey to the West • Thor vs John Henry • Romulus and Remus vs Cain and Abel • Maui vs Manco Capac • Samson vs Rapunzel • Jack Frost vs the Snow Queen • King Midas vs Nicholas Flamel | |
| News | Series Announcement • 1.5 News With Pope Joan • Season 2 News With Zorro | |
| Off-Season |
Robespierre vs the Headless Horseman • The Gingerbread Man vs Frosty the Snowman | |
